Newbie - FAQ

As long as the references are established, I'll contact them...
VOO-doo 288 reads
posted

To me, 'established' means that they possess all or most of the following qualities: 1) Have a website, 2) Have active ads on venues other than BP, 3) Seem intelligent in their presentation and correspondence, 4) Seem like they give a sh** about who they see, i.e. have some standards, 5) Have reviews, 6) Have been around for more than a few months, and 7) Are not known for lax screening, drug use, or other risky activities.  

If a reference has all - or at least, say, 4 of 7 - then I'll contact her. Whether or not I accept the reference depends upon the vibe I get, though. Some girls don't screen... some girls accept behaviors from clients I wouldn't... some girls can't even remember if they saw the guy or not. They'll say, 'Well, doesn't ring a bell, but if he did anything bad to me I'd remember.' Plus, I'm always surprised how many women have seen guys I'd personally think *nobody* would, like, EVER see.  

I don't recommend asking to meet for coffee (or a drink) as a way to make her feel more comfortable. To me, it comes across as a way to avoid screening... or, if you don't make it clear that you understand that the time is compensated, I'll feel like you don't value my time/business. I mean, how much time am I expected to spend with you until you feel comfortable? An hour, or even two or more? And that's in addition to the BCD time? That can easily turn into a whole evening spent, and I'd hope you're not just thinking it's OK to pay for one hour after taking up my whole afternoon or evening.

It also kind of screams timewaster. I personally travel to all of my dates, so I incur travel costs (tolls, gas, parking). That's in addition to the time and money it takes for me to be date-ready (hair professionally blown out, fresh mani/pedi, etc.). So when a guy tells me he wants to meet "for coffee" and then "hopefully"... I'll usually tell him that he needs to commit, or choose another lady..

If a provider is a member of P411 and they say that they will see 'All 411 members with references', does that mean that the references have to be P411 members also?  Or can they be from other sources?  I'm just trying to get this all figured out.  I'm trying to set up some coffee dates, hopefully leading to the real thing.  Should I ask only P411 members out for coffee then?  Thank you members for all your help.  Bless you, Friskier.

I will keep to myself what I think about those.But all 411 members with references means as long as you have a reputable reference she does not need to be listed on P411 necessarily.

Yeah Jay, coffee and dates are NOT what I'm looking for in an escort.  I may as well sign up for Zoosk or Match.com.  By the time I sign up for P411 and who knows what else, I'll probably find that having a real girlfriend is cheaper.  That's really what I want anyway in the long run.  It's just that it's been over 5 years since I've been with a woman and I kind of feel like a kid starting over again and I want to get my confidence back.  This is really difficult for me. Thank you for your response!

A bunch of ladies were arrested a couple of years back because cops were acquiring P411 Okays solely from coffee dates. It was a big hit to P411 in terms of provider safety so Gina mandated that Okays could only be given after an actual BCD date. Just to let you know.

"Provider Safety", but NOT "protection" ... Got it.  

Posted By: Tobi Telford
A bunch of ladies were arrested a couple of years back because cops were acquiring P411 Okays solely from coffee dates. It was a big hit to P411 in terms of provider safety so Gina mandated that Okays could only be given after an actual BCD date. Just to let you know.

Posted By: Tobi Telford
A bunch of ladies were arrested a couple of years back because cops were acquiring P411 Okays solely from coffee dates. It was a big hit to P411 in terms of provider safety so Gina mandated that Okays could only be given after an actual BCD date. Just to let you know.
About a month ago I screened a P411 member and each lady I contacted from his "Okays" list told me that he was not full service; he just likes to talk.  But he'd written many explicit and detailed reviews to the contrary, and then turned out to be blacklisted when I checked another resource. Not someone I want to meet.  ;-)

Should I notify Gina about this?  Based upon the above "coffee dates" problem it seems like she might want to know about it.  

TIA!

GaGambler248 reads

I think you would be doing the community a giant favor by telling Gina.

From what I understand, those ladies should not have given him Okays per Gina's requirements following the Denver debacle. I find it particularly unsettling that he's writing explicit reviews that are essentially fiction. Very fishy.  

In any event, it's probably a good idea to let Gina know. Whether she takes action or not is her prerogative (typically she'll just "make a note") but this is the kind of information that needs to be known. I'm going to guess that the girls who Okayed him didn't intend to break any rules, but it's against P411 protocol regardless and I'm fairly confident that Gina would want it brought to her attention.  

It's these kinds of situations that serve as a reminder that verification sites are just one tool in the proverbial screening toolbox. There are multiple tools available at the ladies' disposal that can help reduce risk (I know you know this, Debra, just a general PSA :)).  

Posted By: Debra_Hollander
Posted By: Tobi Telford
A bunch of ladies were arrested a couple of years back because cops were acquiring P411 Okays solely from coffee dates. It was a big hit to P411 in terms of provider safety so Gina mandated that Okays could only be given after an actual BCD date. Just to let you know.
   
 About a month ago I screened a P411 member and each lady I contacted from his "Okays" list told me that he was not full service; he just likes to talk.  But he'd written many explicit and detailed reviews to the contrary, and then turned out to be blacklisted when I checked another resource. Not someone I want to meet.  ;-)  
   
 Should I notify Gina about this?  Based upon the above "coffee dates" problem it seems like she might want to know about it.  
   
 TIA!

Ms. Hollander,  
The underlying question is now is p411 a social escort verification service or a sexual escort verification service?  Although you have the disclaimer on the website, when your asking Gina that question, we have an idea of where the encounter is supposed to end up.

As long as the reference is well known and has reviews. The references don't have to be members of P411. I've never come across a lady who has that rule. Ask out whomever you want from which ever site you want.. just know that not many like to meet up for coffee, unless you pay for their time.

Posted By: SamanthaBright
As long as the reference is well known and has reviews. The references don't have to be members of P411. I've never come across a lady who has that rule. Ask out whomever you want from which ever site you want.. just know that not many like to meet up for coffee, unless you pay for their time.
Verification sites.Escort promoting business well known escorts.

VOO-doo289 reads

To me, 'established' means that they possess all or most of the following qualities: 1) Have a website, 2) Have active ads on venues other than BP, 3) Seem intelligent in their presentation and correspondence, 4) Seem like they give a sh** about who they see, i.e. have some standards, 5) Have reviews, 6) Have been around for more than a few months, and 7) Are not known for lax screening, drug use, or other risky activities.  

If a reference has all - or at least, say, 4 of 7 - then I'll contact her. Whether or not I accept the reference depends upon the vibe I get, though. Some girls don't screen... some girls accept behaviors from clients I wouldn't... some girls can't even remember if they saw the guy or not. They'll say, 'Well, doesn't ring a bell, but if he did anything bad to me I'd remember.' Plus, I'm always surprised how many women have seen guys I'd personally think *nobody* would, like, EVER see.  

I don't recommend asking to meet for coffee (or a drink) as a way to make her feel more comfortable. To me, it comes across as a way to avoid screening... or, if you don't make it clear that you understand that the time is compensated, I'll feel like you don't value my time/business. I mean, how much time am I expected to spend with you until you feel comfortable? An hour, or even two or more? And that's in addition to the BCD time? That can easily turn into a whole evening spent, and I'd hope you're not just thinking it's OK to pay for one hour after taking up my whole afternoon or evening.

It also kind of screams timewaster. I personally travel to all of my dates, so I incur travel costs (tolls, gas, parking). That's in addition to the time and money it takes for me to be date-ready (hair professionally blown out, fresh mani/pedi, etc.). So when a guy tells me he wants to meet "for coffee" and then "hopefully"... I'll usually tell him that he needs to commit, or choose another lady..

Also please expect to pay near her hourly rate for just coffee. Some ladies have different rates for this, others will still be 50% or more of their hourly rate.  

Posted By: Friskier1
If a provider is a member of P411 and they say that they will see 'All 411 members with references', does that mean that the references have to be P411 members also?  Or can they be from other sources?  I'm just trying to get this all figured out.  I'm trying to set up some coffee dates, hopefully leading to the real thing.  Should I ask only P411 members out for coffee then?  Thank you members for all your help.  Bless you, Friskier.

You would actually do better to submit employment verification, and perhaps offer to submit a deposit to show you're serious and reliable.  
This will save you time and money.  

This is only, of course, if you were only intending to meet for coffee as a screening method.
Maybe you actually prefer to have coffee before committing to a full rendez-vous. But, as others mentioned, you will need to pay her for her time.

As I have a 2 hour minimum, I will occasionally offer a meet & greet rate. I'm sure there are others who are ammenable to it.

Well, this has been nothing but a stone wall so far.  I am working part time on my mom's rental houses that are down, for no pay.  She's old and needs help.  My income is the monthly payments I'm receiving from my body shop business I sold.  Up until 6 months ago I had been living at a Christian ministry volunteering for free (What a great reference that would be).  I am not LE!!  I am harmless, only want to have a little fun before I'm too old to, kind of like most of us.  I understand that providers need to protect themselves, but I need someone to give me a break!  That's why I thought we'd just meet first, with compensation for time, of course, and I could hopefully prove that I am who I say I am.    I'm sure that most clients would just as soon not help me and freeze me out.  What benefit is it for them to have another client out there?  As far as R411 goes, the gal said with no job, proof of a pension, or references, I was bummin'.  So, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. So forgive me for my persistence, but it seems my only recourse is to reach out to a provider that will give me a chance.  Trust me, I am deserving, and trustworthy.

Register Now!