I appreciate that you've taken mine and others' reactions to heart.  Yeah, you're right that you're not the only hobbyist who has ever put up an offensive post, but the hostility towards providers you displayed on the national board and in your comments on the TC board were really (IMO based on more than a year as a TER member) in a league of its own.  To your credit, you seem to recognize that.  

As for the point that your posts were moderated, one of the privileges of being a TER member is to be able to give feedback to the moderator, including objecting to a post that the moderator has approved.  

Good luck, WJG.  My strong feelings about your posts were not intended as a personal attack; they reflect personal views about this hobby that have evolved over many years. In a nutshell, my opinion is that the decision to participate in this hobby is a personal choice, which carries with it the responsibility to treat providers with respect, especially in a public forum such as TER.

Your sins are no greater than many here and among what are found on the regional boards everyday. You 'fessed up to poor taste and that's good enough for me. Whether these ladies are here from their own choosing or some other reason, we only owe them respect and courtesy for the time spent together and  of course that should be reciprocated. If there is an un-written contract, that's it, no more or less. The only time that a provider should be mentioned negatively IMHO is when poor performance occurs and that should always be in the context of a review. What we think about their personal plight cannot be discerned in an hour or two even when it comes from her lips to your ears. Like most things in life, people take their own roads to these venues; you and I are passer-bys. If you decide to take an interest in anyone, fine, there is morbid curiosity in all facets of life.

As people though, who may be experiencing a dark period in their lives, who among us cannot relate to the demons that at one time or another seek us all? So when her looks fade and her pages of reviews multiply, ask yourself what do you really know of that history, of those moments in time? You and I can only guess, and it's that supposition that often crosses the line that you have been so severely scolded. I have never written or discussed half of the people I have met in these pages and along the way. You won't either. So stick around because you have learned what all must learn and that is one man(or woman) can live only in the skin that they were assigned, no matter how troubled our days may appear,  So learn it now. "No man (woman) has ever yet lived out any life, but one, and that one, his (her) chosen own, and most of that alone".

-- Modified on 8/6/2005 6:31:29 AM

-- Modified on 8/6/2005 6:34:51 AM

Cause, quite frankly one of the ladies that I really do enjoy has more pages than that!  and still she provides an excellent experience - so my comment to the pages of execelent service would be "who and where is she?"  Again, ya don't know what will happen!

Yes, you have been chastised - I would suggest that you be quiet for a bit, I know your feelings are hurt - but really, is cyber wet noodle lashing soo bad that you have to comment as people get this out of their systems!?  

Thanks.

You're right in everything you wrote except, I think, in your conclusions about WJG.

Isn't is obvious how much this guy has learned in a few days about treating people better?

Isn't that one of the truly valuable things about TER - that it warns people in this world how to stay safe and it teaches them how to understand and respect one another better?

Hasn't WJG just shown that he is very able to improve himself because he is open to criticism and thoughtful enough to listen and try to understand?  Isn't that what makes for a decent human being?

Yes, I have read some of his posts and been appalled.  But the beauty is that he is learning and learning amazingly fast.  He is honest here about himself and his less lovely thoughts because at some level he knew enough to question them and, perhaps unknowingly, outed his demons so he could be seen for that unpleasant part of himself and have those things addressed in a forum in which it was safe for that to happen.  A lot cheaper and quicker and more effective than therapy (perhaps)!

Of course, I was not the subject of his less noble thoughts...either directly or by implications.  Someone with many reviews would, of course, take his comments as a personal attack and be justified in doing so.  Someone who is a provider...or for that matter, a woman, would naturally feel threatened and violated by the comment that he did not regard them as human.  But there are MANY people who feel this way, they just don't post about it here.  The fact that he did shows, not that he is total scum; rather, that he finally recognizes those thoughts as scum.  I think he always knew it in his soul but hid the knowledge from himself.  I think he posted about it in an effort to cleanse himself of his own more vile side.  It would be a better world if we could all do that - the ancient Greeks invented tragedy as a way to do so and those works of art have managed to survive with respect and admiration for many centuries because there is something innately beneficial about them and their use in improving our lives.

Ironically, not only do I think he would be a good poster to have around TER as long as he thinks he might benefit from it...I also think what he has learned here will help him hugely in his other life, with family and friends and business relations, and that he may ultimately find that he got out of this world what he most needed and has raised himself to a higher place than where he was when he started.


-- Modified on 8/6/2005 12:10:45 PM

you turn the knife on men with your generalizations about how we see women and sex. Yes, some men will always be complete assholes about the women who are free with their sexual activities. NetMichele seems to be one who gets it right in that we are all sluts if you are participating. Let's leave it at WJGs post was indeed wrong and shameful, but let's not use it as  a bandwagon approach.

I liked your web-site-  You ARE HOT! indeed!  Would not mind seeing you... how do you feel about green?! Does constant phone ringing to right the wrongs of the world disturb you?  And most importantly, do you have any Kryptonite around where it could hurt me?!

Clearly, I enjoy women who enjoy their sexuality..., in or out of the hobby, and clearly you are such a woman.