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Is losing one's virginity to a provider stigmatized?

Posted 5/17/2012 at 6:14:00 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

Is losing one's virginity to a provider stigmatized?

In my opinion, it sure seems like it is, at least on here occasionally. Could my perception be wrong? Sure, and I welcome posts that state the contrary.

To those who would stigmatize those who lose their virginity to a provider: can I encourage you to not put everyone into a box, not demand everyone conform to what you think is "normal" and to not make such broad generalizations? Everyone's story is different and just because someone loses their virginity to a provider does not necessarily mean that he is a loser. Does this mean that no one who loses his virginity to a provider is a loser? Of course not! I just want to warn against unfairly judging and stigmatizing others. It's best to learn someone's story and walk in their shoes before denouncing them as this or that.

Again, I'm not trying to throw stones. This is just the impression I get on here sometimes. I welcome correction if I'm wrong.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 6:20:01 PM

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HeathersLuv4u

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Depends how do you feel about the constant reminder that you paid someone to take it..? Do this

Go to a club and get your drink on...see what happens .
Hopefully you'll at least stumble upon some fugly around closing time. If so, aske her if she'd like to go to the waffle house then hit her up for a piece of ass...just kidding

Posted 5/17/2012 at 6:21:02 PM

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London Rayne

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"I" would not take money to take virginity, and I won't. What another woman chooses to do, is her business. I happen to think virginity is a sacred thing...so what. I wish I had waited until I was in love to lose mine. I don't judge another for their decisions, but that does not mean I have to be the one partaking in it either. Just like I take money to fk a married man, I won't cheat if I were married. If a guy is hell bent on cheating, I sure as hell would not give the nookie up for free...that's the only difference.

While we are on the topic of stigmas though, I also won't fk my brother or sister just because it's considered cool for some guys in the hobby. I doubt I would fk an 18 year old either at this age, but have when I was younger.

-- Modified on 5/17/2012 2:23:15 PM

-- Modified on 5/17/2012 2:24:07 PM

Posted 5/17/2012 at 6:45:34 PM

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Martha_Focker

I feel bad for guys who are so scared of rejection that

They won't even try to meet a woman under normal circumstances.

There are men on this board who have never been on a civie date in their life. Have never experienced the joy of courting a young woman, holding hands with her, falling in love...

These are parts of growing up and becoming a man.

I just think that it's a disservice to hire an escort to lose your virginity, rather than court a normal lady. If a guy chooses to take the easy way out, so be it, but as London said, I would not knowingly participate in the hobby with a virgin boy.

Quote:

Posted By: Jack_Inhoff
In my opinion, it sure seems like it is, at least on here occasionally. Could my perception be wrong? Sure, and I welcome posts that state the contrary.

To those who would stigmatize those who lose their virginity to a provider: can I encourage you to not put everyone into a box, not demand everyone conform to what you think is "normal" and to not make such broad generalizations? Everyone's story is different and just because someone loses their virginity to a provider does not necessarily mean that he is a loser. Does this mean that no one who loses his virginity to a provider is a loser? Of course not! I just want to warn against unfairly judging and stigmatizing others. It's best to learn someone's story and walk in their shoes before denouncing them as this or that.

Again, I'm not trying to throw stones. This is just the impression I get on here sometimes. I welcome correction if I'm wrong.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:36:29 PM

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SoftlySarah

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I'm going to differ here

from the other ladies. While I completely respect their views, I completely disagree. I was just thinking about this topic the other day, as a matter of fact.

In many cultures, paying a lady to take your virginity is very common and expected. And I don't believe virginity is sacred either. I think mystifying virginity and sexuality in general is a bad idea, and leads to a lot of guilty, shame-bearing, messed up people unable to connect to their real inner selves. Especially women!

Paying someone to take your virginity, if you find the right woman, can really set you up for life as a man. She can teach you so many wonderful things about women's bodes. She can teach you many intricacies that most men won't learn in a lifetime. She can teach you marvelous things about your own body before you get all weirded out by things like anal play by civilian girls.

So it is not stigmatized in my mind. Not at all. I have dated enough men in my civilian world from other countries to know this is common and unremarkable. Go with a professional!!

If I want to learn to surf, I am going to a professional instructor, not some dude on the beach.

You go!! Have fun!! My recommendation: Get an older provider- someone who's been there and done that a bit. She will be able to teach you the most. There are plenty of "gorgeous" mature providers out there. There will be plenty of time to date the young hotties after you've learned a few tricks.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:39:38 PM

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SoftlySarah

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I'm also going to say

at the risk of differing yet again from my colleagues, that young, inexperienced ladies who are out for a good time- god love 'em- are probably far less safe healthcare-wise than a professional. If you go that route, be extra careful.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:03:27 PM

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cock-up

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Re: losing one's virginity, For most guys it's a simple rite of passage ...

I think girls and guys have a very different point of view about losing their virginity.

Most girls think like London , they see it as "sacred" associated with deep feelings for "the loved one", almost a religious thing...

For most guys it's a simple rite of passage to manhood and to feel how it is to stick their dick in a pussy for the first time...nothing more...

Don't know who's wrong or right, blame porn or the church...

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:21:35 PM

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lungman

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had i not already lost my virginity, i wouldn't have a problem getting laid by a provider. Hell, you would think the way guys think, getting a piece of ass for the first time, would be something they welcomed!! ( even if it's paid for ) Remember, we think with our dicks!!! No emotional harm here!!

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:56:47 PM

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harbor_view

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It was once traditional in Colonial America

for an older male relative to take the young gentleman to a lady of known skills to get his carnal education.
I happened to lose mine at a tender age, however I would feel no shame had I chosen to break the dry spell which followed with a professional lady. I feel that some can indeed educate a gentleman, give him confidence & skills so that when he has an opportunity he will have a level playng field with his peers... maybe even an advantage.
I recall a first date during my senior year of HS, having broken up with my former GF. Without anything being said, she sensed that I was considerably more experienced than she. After HS, more experienced men were suddenly more desireable partners...
I do not consider my "losing my virginity" to have been a special gift. I remember it more as the fumblings of 2 teens. But amongst the college crowd, lack of skills was more of a disadvantage & women & girls expected a guy to be at least competant.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 4:40:53 AM

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ChiefRedbeard

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In our society, albeit is changing, losing virginity for a woman is far different than for a man. Women are raised to "be a good girl" and to save it for their true love. For men, there is far less emphasis on love. For women it is a point in their life when everything changes. For the man, it is a milestone. The nearest thing for men, to a woman losing her virginity, is their first tit in hand, and even that, wonderful as it was, pales in comparison.

Posted 5/20/2012 at 8:05:05 AM

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courtesanmonroe

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i think its brave

i have deflowered 2 that i know of. and i am proud of them. and one of them was damn good. they last longer than any of my other clients too.

Posted 5/20/2012 at 5:51:14 PM

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JT1902

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Actually, I don't think...

Most providers ask their clients if they are virgins.... so they'd have no way of knowing anyhow. I would imagine there's a few out there that might prompt the guy if he appears really young and nervous, but I don't think the majority would even ask. Especially considering if they are already in the room with him by the time they suspect this, then they are on the verge of getting their donation anyhow, and would not be inclined to waste all of their time leaving when the guy really hasn't done anything wrong.

As to whether it is "correct" Quite frankly I think this is another question of personal freedom and the right to make a decision, and people shouldn't be meddling in other people's business. In Afghanistan prior to 2001, a man could be arrested if his beard was not long enough. That's a case of the government trying to control others. With people who take the moral high ground and criticize a virgin who sees a provider, this is just another case of an attempt to control when no harm has been caused... except "possibly" to the virgin, depending on your perspective. However, just as with everything else, the virgin willfully made the choice, whether it caused him harm or pleasure. If someone chooses to screw themselves up and no one else gets hurt in the process, then that's their business as far as I'm concerned. However, I see no possible way that a virgin will experience harm by seeing a provider. Obviously everyone does not feel this way though.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:21:39 PM

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HarlandSanders

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Based on your response

I guess there is a stigma, huh?

Posted 5/18/2012 at 12:24:20 AM

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Duplicitouslust

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Dear Ms. Rayne:
I was wondering what was the socialization and set of mores that gave you certain parameters that you would not exceed? I also was wondering do you usually require a certain psychological and intellectual development that is usually correlated with age and that is why you would knowingly see someone so young or someone who falls into the age bracket you mentioned? Would you also be somewhat afraid of giving a person a complex at that age and not letting them fully develop themselves socially by engaging in the hobby at such an early age?

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:02:24 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

Martha, it can be hard, especially these days.

Martha, first of all, you are more than entitled to your opinion, and you certainly have a right to provide service to who you want to provide service, and to turn down any potential clients you wish due to their virginity or other reasons.

But let me say this. The conventional dating game, especially for us men, can be extremely brutal, and I'm not sure many to all women understand this. We have to do the wining and dining, paying and always make sure we put our best foot forward. These days, more than ever, women, especially the ones that give me a hard on, have such ridiculously high expectations that relationships die before they ever get off the ground.

Now, I have done my share of civie dating, but it never got to the point where I got into bed with my civie dates, and there's plenty of reasons for this. I'm certainly not free of blame. It also doesn't help that I went through an extremely evangelical Christian stage of my life where I lived a lifestyle of asceticism that discouraged sexual activity outside of marriage. I couldn't even jack off without feeling guilty. I'm glad I left religion behind.

In the civie world, just like in the provider world, I can only get a hard on for women who are absolutely gorgeous.... and those gorgeous women in the civie world tend to be married, have a boyfriend, or be complete bitches because they know they're hot and men will do anything to get them in bed.

Perhaps this might give a glimpse why getting a civie girl in bed is so hard, at least for me.

Quote:

Posted By: Martha_Focker

They won't even try to meet a woman under normal circumstances.

There are men on this board who have never been on a civie date in their life. Have never experienced the joy of courting a young woman, holding hands with her, falling in love...

These are parts of growing up and becoming a man.

I just think that it's a disservice to hire an escort to lose your virginity, rather than court a normal lady. If a guy chooses to take the easy way out, so be it, but as London said, I would not knowingly participate in the hobby with a virgin boy.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:19:57 PM

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LonerGuy

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Re: I feel bad for guys who are so scared of rejection that

Quote:

Posted By: Martha_Focker

They won't even try to meet a woman under normal circumstances.

There are men on this board who have never been on a civie date in their life. Have never experienced the joy of courting a young woman, holding hands with her, falling in love...

These are parts of growing up and becoming a man.

I just think that it's a disservice to hire an escort to lose your virginity, rather than court a normal lady. If a guy chooses to take the easy way out, so be it, but as London said, I would not knowingly participate in the hobby with a virgin boy.

You make it sound like going on a date and falling in love are choices. If either one were remotely a choice, I'd have fallen in love and gotten married by now. I'd much rather be in a loving, monogamous relationship than be a hobbyist, but not everyone gets to be a winner in life. Some people are just evolutionary cannon fodder.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:20:02 PM

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anorgasmia

So in your mind

it is better to die a virgin and never ever have the opportunity to be close to a woman than to pay for it?

You don't realize how hard it is for an introvert, or people with social anxiety, low self confidence, etc, to actually meet someone. if you are not in their shoes, you don't know. If for some guys that is the only way they can be with a woman, so be it. I say that is better than never ever knowing what it is like.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:20:24 PM

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HarlandSanders

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You're wrong about one thing

It's not that a guy is taking the easy way out to lose his virginity. It's the he may have been turned down over and over and over and over for just a simple date. I have friends who have been turned down 20 times before they ever got a girl to say yes to a date... much less a romp in the hay. I have a friend who struggled for years to find a girlfriend. He was 28 and decided he didn't want to be a virgin anymore and hired a pro. Should he have waited? Maybe. But, I couldn't fault him for being 28 and having faced so much rejection that he just wanted to get it over with. He took a way out, but it was definitely not easy.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:37:37 PM

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ddp71

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I'm confused ...

... as to why you think losing your virginity to an escort is any different than fucking anyone else. Maybe it's because I'm a guy and you're a woman, and I certainly can't speak for men in general, but losing my virginity meant nothing special to me. I was 15 and I fucked a girl in the backseat of her car at the beach. It wasn't some life-altering magical moment like some crappy John Hughes flick. Actually, if it had been with a provider in a really nice hotel room with candles and all that other romantic stuff it probably would have been alot more memorable. Yes, overall I prefer to be with a woman who has real feelings for me, but I don't believe a majority of guys hold their virginity in such high regard.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:18:05 PM

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Martha_Focker

Are easy to bed.

From jailbate to age 23, I was as easy as Sunday morning.

All you had to do was buy me a burger and put a few cocktails in me and I would put out.

I can understand that dating is hard. It's hard for women too. But getting laid by a civie is NOT that hard! I promise you. Young, hot, tipsy women who don't yet have standards are the easiest women in the world.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:21:54 PM

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anorgasmia

Yeah if you are a handsome hot stud who has "game"

A lot of guys are not, and do not.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:27:23 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

Martha, you're assuming...

Martha, you're assuming that all of us dudes are in to geting shitfaced and hanging out in the bar/club scene. Maybe that just doesn't appeal to some of us.

Quote:

Posted By: Martha_Focker
Are easy to bed.

From jailbate to age 23, I was as easy as Sunday morning.

All you had to do was buy me a burger and put a few cocktails in me and I would put out.

I can understand that dating is hard. It's hard for women too. But getting laid by a civie is NOT that hard! I promise you. Young, hot, tipsy women who don't yet have standards are the easiest women in the world.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:29:51 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

And Martha, just because you were easy, doesn't mean everyone else was/is.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:57:15 PM

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LonerGuy

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Re: Young women

In some jurisdictions, "a few cocktails" would be called "diminished mental capacity," a state in which a person can no longer legally consent to sex, even if they are 23 years old. You are, in effect, advocating statutory rape.

Quote:

Posted By: Martha_Focker
Are easy to bed.

From jailbate to age 23, I was as easy as Sunday morning.

All you had to do was buy me a burger and put a few cocktails in me and I would put out.

I can understand that dating is hard. It's hard for women too. But getting laid by a civie is NOT that hard! I promise you. Young, hot, tipsy women who don't yet have standards are the easiest women in the world.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:49:09 PM

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SoftlySarah

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"evolutionary cannon fodder". I think there is someone for everyone out there. The problem I see with professional women is that you may be used to paying for some really beautiful women and not notice some very average but willing and loving women out there.

Quote:

Posted By: LonerGuy

You make it sound like going on a date and falling in love are choices. If either one were remotely a choice, I'd have fallen in love and gotten married by now. I'd much rather be in a loving, monogamous relationship than be a hobbyist, but not everyone gets to be a winner in life. Some people are just evolutionary cannon fodder.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:28:14 PM

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London Rayne

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You guys are reading way too much into this. I don't think seeing a hooker

to lose your virginity is the end all be all, but I simply won't be a part of it. I also agree that it is easy as hell to fk a hot chick in today's world. I was a bigger slut than I ever am now that I am a hooker lol. I had bars on my windows at 14 and you are crazy to think all those boys were young, good looking, and had any kind of game lol. There are girls today offering up tag teams and anal, when I was 21 before ever doing that bs and I have still never done a full DP...never will. Saying because you can't get laid leads to seeing hookers, is like saying a depressed person has the right to use drugs to feel better. You won't die without getting laid! You WILL die if you don't eat and have plenty of water for weeks on end though. When we get to talking about what is really important in life, this does not even rate in the top 3.

-- Modified on 5/17/2012 3:33:48 PM

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:26:00 PM

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HarlandSanders

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Not handsome or hot, just game

It's all about attitude with the young drunk ones. The thing is, by the time you spend money on that burger, cover charge to the club, $12 appletinis for the both of you til everyone is sloshed, all you have is a maybe. Save up that dough and get a sure thing. That's why these ladies are in business, right?

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:34:00 PM

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Martha_Focker

YOU don't have to get shitfaced. Just her!

Also, I don't advocate underaged dating but hang out in the parking lot of high schools. They are the easiest girls out there.

(18 and over of course!)

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:34:25 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

It may not be so easy to fk a hot civie chick

As I told Martha, perhaps not every hot gal was as easy as you are. Just because you were easy, doesn't mean every other hot woman is. Let's not make generalizations It's been my experience that the hottest civie women are the hardest to fuck, and many of my fellow dudes would agree with me.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:36:15 PM

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Martha_Focker

All of my friends were easy too!

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:35:50 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

Now that's just asking for trouble. You're kidding, right? EOM

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:45:56 PM

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SoftlySarah

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Are you serious?? You'd advise this poor fellow to troll HS parking lots before hiring a professional??

I have all kinds of respect for you ladies here, but I am very surprised that you're all recommending young, drunk, and dumb as some fellow's first experience. There's something a bit hypocritical about that if you're so insistent that virginity is a sacred thing! Wouldn't you agree?

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:38:15 PM

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London Rayne

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Move to Louisiana..that's all I am saying. Half the Cheerleaders

in the junior and senior classes were knocked up. Has nothing to do with being easy dude...even the most innocent ones of the bunch seem to be giving it up. Now, maybe not to some old guy 20 years her senior, but they were certainly serving it up at Homecoming. And, if you need a perfect 10 to get laid that could be your problem. If that's the case, then yes you need hookers. Does it make you a loser? No, but it makes you a bit unrealistic.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:37:40 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/18/2012 at 5:11:21 AM

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mrfisher

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When you said that "virginity is not sacred", that was a bit of an epiphany for me....

as I spent an entire adolescence thinking it was so.

How much that fact might have warped me and in what direction is hard to say, but I think mankind would be improved if that yoke of oppression could be lifted somehow.

I don't have the answer, but I thank you for pointing out the direction to look in.

Yours is the most thoughtful insight yet.

By the way, I lost my hand and mouth virginity to a pro, but the intercourse to a civie, so I guess I fall somewhere in between. I was 22 when all three events occurred.

I wonder how many men do lose their virginity to pros versus civies?

A poll might be instructive.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:39:49 PM

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London Rayne

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Nope, they don't and that's ok too. They are free to find a hooker who feels the same way.

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:41:43 PM

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SoftlySarah

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also don't. I didn't. I just wanted it gone so I could get on with being wild.

I would have been MUCH, MUCH better off with a professional!!

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:45:00 PM

38 of 63

Jack_Inhoff

Perhaps you are right about me being unrealistic....

Perhaps you are right about me being unrealistic, but I am who I am, and nothing can change that. Your high school experience was your experience, but it wasn't mine...

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:43:46 PM

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London Rayne

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Welll yea, I doubt the bar girl makes him use a condom lol.

You are free to your beliefs babe, no need to apologize for them. I happen to know what happens when we get too liberal with our feelings and views on certain things, and it has never led to anything positive at ALL in my life. Others don't feel guilt or shame for anything they do, so they have no problems being "free."

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:49:34 PM

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London Rayne

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You are only being unrealistic if you think that every perfect 10

you try to bang is going to do it...nothing else about your posts is so unrealistic.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:48:08 PM

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London Rayne

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She is kidding! You were not around for the prom thread when she was against it.

If a girl is stupid enough to spread her legs for free no matter what the circumstance, wtf do I care? She is the dumb, easy one just like I was at one point in time. As long as she is a "willing" participant, at least the boy knows she wants to be there.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:49:15 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

Sarah, just to clarify...

Sarah, just to clarify, I lost my virginity a LONG time ago, and yes, it was to a provider. I'm obviously not looking to lose my virginity now. I'm just bringing this up for a conversational topic.

But yes, you are right about Martha's advice. It borders on horrifying.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:51:43 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

I sure hope she is kidding! EOM

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:54:04 PM

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SoftlySarah

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Glad she's kidding! eom

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:54:26 PM

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London Rayne

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BINGO! The illusion of the hobby only sets guys up for even MORE

reality! If you think that because you can pay for a 10 that you can also get a dozen for free, you are kidding yourself. I mean yes it is certainly possible, but it has nothing to do with this business here and what is done in it. This is not about some poor dude who gets rejected..sounds more to me like a horny guy who just wants to fk hot women by any means possible. There are good women of all shapes, ages, and sizes, but you get used to fkin porn stars and supermodels and suddenly a regular 8 is only a 2...whose fault is that?

I think the difference between "most" men and women is that we don't go this route all too often. I too would love to marry a hot, successful guy again, but I also know that going out and thinking I can pay for his affection is not real. I don't get off on just sex from someone I paid, but my makeup is a bit different lol. You can't by "true" feelings, but yes you can buy sex...I am not in need of the latter.

-- Modified on 5/17/2012 4:00:19 PM

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:54:54 PM

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SoftlySarah

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And so how was it? Are you glad you did?

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:58:21 PM

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SoftlySarah

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This is very true. It is one thing to want to hire someone for a special time, quite another to imagine that you'd like to spend the rest of your life with someone like that. Sort of like when women get used to only having orgasms via power tools.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 7:59:24 PM

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LonerGuy

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Re: BINGO! The illusion of the hobby only sets guys up for even MORE

Quote:

Posted By: London Rayne
reality! If you think that because you can pay for a 10 that you can also get a dozen for free, you are kidding yourself. I mean yes it is certainly possible, but it has nothing to do with this business here and what is done in it. This is not about some poor dude who gets rejected..sounds more to me like a horny guy who just wants to fk hot women by any means possible. There are good women of all shapes, ages, and sizes, but you get used to fkin porn stars and supermodels and suddenly a regular 8 is only a 2...whose fault is that?

This is definitely on my mind. I like to think I have reasonable expectations when it comes to dating. I usually try for what I consider to be "average looking" women. I just hope that my definition of "average" doesn't get skewed by the hobby...

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:01:56 PM

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Jack_Inhoff

The first time.....

The first time wasn't the best, and that's for several reasons. But ever since then, it's been wonderful!

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:12:49 PM

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London Rayne

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Well then most hobby sex is also just that.

I can't even count the number of providers I know personally who drink on their dates...have yet to see the review end with, "And I just couldn't fk her." Being drunk is one thing, but drinking as an adult is legally allowed to do is another.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:02:31 PM

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London Rayne

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I am starting to like you ha ha. I tossed the tools long ago! EOM.

END OF MESSAGE

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:15:36 PM

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London Rayne

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Well as long as you only do 4s, 5s, and 6s, you are ok ha ha.

I simply don't see how it would not mess up expectations. I mean if all I got to fk were Brad Pitt and Jason Statham every day, I think Tom Cruise would even be average to me. The difference is, you get to know a person on a deeper level without the sex first in real life, so for many that is all it takes for a 3 to become an 8. You should see a few of my exes ha ha.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:08:43 PM

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SoftlySarah

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Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:17:59 PM

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London Rayne

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You are right ha ha. I did not enjoy my first time and wish

it would have been with someone I loved. Would I have paid for it? Hell no, but wish it was more special. For that matter, I wish my first two husbands were more special lmao.

Posted 5/17/2012 at 9:28:36 PM

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SoftlySarah

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Mostly the church. eom

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Posted 5/17/2012 at 8:23:13 PM

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LonerGuy

Reviews: 14

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Re: Well then most hobby sex is also just that.

The word "few" is vague and leads to confusion. I'm well aware of the difference between responsible drinking and being drunk.

Quote:

Posted By: London Rayne
I can't even count the number of providers I know personally who drink on their dates...have yet to see the review end with, "And I just couldn't fk her." Being drunk is one thing, but drinking as an adult is legally allowed to do is another.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 7:19:30 AM

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LoboGris

Reviews: 2

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Re: Well then most hobby sex is also just that.

Drinking and being drunk are two different things... I have had a glass of wine with several ladies which is a tad different from the first non brothel hooker I saw that needed to get drunk to do her job.. she passed out, I didn't fuck her nor did I write a review (didn't even know such existed).. it was quite some time before I found review sites and put my toe back in the water (or if you prefer, dick back in the ....) of p4p...

Quote:

Posted By: London Rayne
I can't even count the number of providers I know personally who drink on their dates...have yet to see the review end with, "And I just couldn't fk her." Being drunk is one thing, but drinking as an adult is legally allowed to do is another.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 8:20:50 AM

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London Rayne

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There are just a few things I would rather not get paid for,

and that is only one of them. I would never do two brothers, a father and son, would never turn someone out so to speak, and this one. I know it's a shock that some hookers don't just say YES to any situation concerning sex these days, but what did you expect from me ha ha. I have a charity page full of churches I support financially every week too. Just because ONE part of my life does not line up with what I believe, does not mean I have to toss it all in the toilet. If you smoke pot, does that mean you may as well hit the crack pipe too? I think not. If you see hookers does that mean you would encourage your own daughter to join the biz? Again, I think not. I also don't curse in front of my child or my parents, and don't dress like a stripper...ever.

-- Modified on 5/18/2012 4:28:19 AM

Posted 5/18/2012 at 4:36:53 AM

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SoftlySarah

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I wonder too. And those who did- I wonder if they bothered to teach you anything?

Yes, we mystify sexuality way too much. It can be mystical, but doesn't have to be- completely personal choice. And I for one believe it should be an informed personal choice- not brainwashed into us as children.

Sex is he whole reason we exist. It is the most primal urge and basic reason for doing most of what we do. Whoever decided that we had to stem our passions was truly brilliant. No better method of social control.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 10:36:46 AM

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nahtynikkey

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I noticed that many take this view, which is actually just a belief constructed by society. The whole "being a virgin" when you got married/for the "love of your life" actually has it's roots in the fact that decades ago, birth control was not common, & so when a couple was married, the wife being a virgin was a necessity, in order for the man to ensure that the child she was carrying was his & not some other man's child. In this day & age, with a woman being able to control when she gets pregnant(for the most part) sexuality has taken a different tune.

I personally was brought up with the belief that you did not have sex until you were married... well, at 16, hormones raging & thinking I was in love(1st boyfriend) I lost my virginity. Four months later, caught him cheating & was sooo confused (now what? I'm no longer "sacred"). By my 3rd boyfriend, I had completely gotten over the stigmatization & realized that men do it all the time. Do I regret my decisions I made at 16? Nope, not a bit. Because that decision made me who I am today & made me realize that sex is just sex... is does NOT equate love, unless both parties are in a committed relationship with equal feelings.. THEN it is "special" and means something... otherwise, it's JUST sex.

I do not think anyone should be stigmatized for their decisions about their bodies. As others have pointed out, a man loosing his virginity is not the same as a woman(although that completely depends on the woman). Someone else also pointed out the fact that fathers, with the knowledge that their 16 year old was still a virgin, would commonly take him to see a provider to loose his virginity with.... although this is not as widely practiced now-a-days.

Quote:

Posted By: ChiefRedbeard
In our society, albeit is changing, losing virginity for a woman is far different than for a man. Women are raised to "be a good girl" and to save it for their true love. For men, there is far less emphasis on love. For women it is a point in their life when everything changes. For the man, it is a milestone. The nearest thing for men, to a woman losing her virginity, is their first tit in hand, and even that, wonderful as it was, pales in comparison.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 8:17:16 AM

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London Rayne

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As I wrote, yes drinking and drunk are different but

unless the girl is falling down and slurring her speech, I doubt any of you guys bring a breath test machine, so it is no different than fking a civie girl who is drinking or paying to fk a provider who is drinking. For my body weight, I have been legally drunk many times but you would never know it. So, you're saying those guys raped me? LOL...ok, but I took the money so there ya go.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 11:48:21 AM

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LonerGuy

Reviews: 14

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Re: As I wrote, yes drinking and drunk are different but

The key phrase that would make it statutory rape is: "diminished mental capacity." Do you feel you were in a state where you were so far under the influence of alcohol that you were no longer in a position to make decisions for yourself? From what you said: "I have been legally drunk many times but you would never know it" -- it doesn't sound like that would qualify and you were still functioning just fine, but I'm not a legal expert, I just talk to them sometimes.

Quote:

Posted By: London Rayne
unless the girl is falling down and slurring her speech, I doubt any of you guys bring a breath test machine, so it is no different than fking a civie girl who is drinking or paying to fk a provider who is drinking. For my body weight, I have been legally drunk many times but you would never know it. So, you're saying those guys raped me? LOL...ok, but I took the money so there ya go.

Posted 5/18/2012 at 7:46:13 PM

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scoed

Reviews: 9

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I would have no issue as long as.....

A, I could not tell because of you behavior, or other factors.

B. I could not smell it.

But if I in any way could tell, I would walk. I have done so in the past. If I think a woman civie or pro, is in anyway has her judgement impaired by any substance, I will not touch her sexually. This includes my wife. It may not be rape, but it is far to close for me. Now if the amount consumed was not enough to have a major affect on her judgement, we are good to go as that is something different. But that will not help a guy get laid as she will still say no if that is what she would do normally.

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