I submitted my information to a very well reviewed, very well regarded provider to be screened. Over a month passed, so I followed up with this person. No reply. Several more reviews popped up. I was a little confused since I had all the required information, good references, and was very respectful and very polite in both the initial and follow up e-mails. Still nothing. Then I realized this provider had asked for ethnicity on their screening form.
Now let me be clear, I'm not here to start a firestorm about ethnicity/race - not by any means at all. I believe - and this is just my own humble opinion - that people are entitled to their preferences, and I respect and understand that. But I guess what kinda hurt my feelings was that this person declined to simply reply with something along the lines of "I prefer not to see you." That's really all I was looking for. Simple, effective, provides closure and we can all go on our merry way.
Anyone else noticing that people - and I realize it works on both the provider and hobbyist ends - are losing common courtesy? Thanks for letting me rant/vent. I'm curious to hear your thoughts.
Not to blow this into a statement about people and society, but yes I agree. You took the time to fill out her form, so you're showing some genuine effort. Assuming the requested info was adequate & sufficiently provided (like the name says), a response wouldn't hurt.
Now you're left thinking something that may or may not be true. But sadly it's only natural that we assume the worst, right? Thank you, no. I'm going back to school & don't have any more availability. I only seeing regulars. My rate is $3,000, and I require 100% prepay by personal check. All acceptable responses (or convenient lies) and you'd be on your way.
.. Frankly this board has been rather dull of late so please by all means please "start a firestorm about ethnicity/race " maybe we'll even have an honest conversation on the subject and get some issues out in the open.
What issues I don't know, but we might get lucky and have a civil, discourse which enlightens us all.
to think that the lady did not respond due to your ethnicity.
Maybe, she didn't get your information. Maybe she got it and deleted it by mistake. Maybe she ___________. Well, you can fill in the blank with lots of possibilities.
To go right to the "race card" is very presumptous on your part.
Most ladies state on their website whether or not they wish to see "men of color" or not. Did she have any such language on hers? I ask since you said you filled out her "screening form" and I am thinking by that description that you were on her website.
While it may or may not be true (only the lady knows for sure), you mentioning this is simply going to open the door to start the firestorm.
While I consider myself colorblind, I know that prejudices are still around. I don't like it anymore than anyone else, but I have learned to live with it nonetheless. It really is a sad thing.
I had an interesting manners problem because she was really great and friendly the first meeting and then the next time was barely worth the effort . I added a third visit and she was awful, showed up at my place might as well of had a sign on her back that said escort she was sticking out like a sore thumb. Didnt show any flirtation, didnt remember me and kept looking out the window and didnt do anything close to what the first visit entailed. Never saw her again and dont understand how you can go into a situation where an hour of being nice to me could mean future visits and extra roses yet you choose to be a bitch.
In the past, I have found that a curt, unfriendly phone manner is pretty indicative that the session will be bad. Recently I have made the decision not to see several gals based on this. Yes, I'm talking about BP gals. Some are just clueless about common courtesy.
Posted By: McDonald000 And like you said, it would have been professional for a provider to update her response, this way, a hobbyist would know and not attempt to email her for inquiries about his initial email.
These days, I will avoid providers asking for a clients race. I know they have a preference, but I also know that they put that up there for a reason.
Now, I simply don't even bother, despite how hot looking she is.
Oh my gosh!!
Are are...are.. you [ Checks his Politically Correct Speech translator App on his phone on how to say this]
A person of color ? * gasp *
[In his best clueless WASP voice]
Because you're a really well spoken and write so intelligently........
I've seen girls that exclusively post "No African American Men" before, so, I am not African American. I just don't want to tell providers that I am white, Hispanic, Asian, or what ever race I am. All that really matters is I'm a good guy, and treat them well. However, I know some providers have a personal preference. Some do it not because of personal preference, but other reasons.
It's just my preference. But, what does my opinion count for. If I want a provider to screen me, then screen me through P411, here on TER, or use provider reference. I don't want to tell them my race, work info, or that other stuff that I feel is unnecessary.
I may have overstated the ethnicity aspect of the issue in my original post. What I really wanted to emphasize was that if that provider had ANY issues with my screening information - no reply from reference, not able to find me on verification site, etc. - a simple reply would have been appreciated. That was all. The ethnicity thing was a side bar, and another example of IF the person had any issue, they could just tell me and let us both move on with our lives. Being ignored is the worst feeling in the world - as we all know from our buddy the Silent Treatment. Tis all I meant, and I went out of my way not to burn this provider or provide any identifying information in case one of your examples was indeed what happened. Either way, I am disappointed in this provider, but am moving on with life. Thanks for letting me rant!