The porn girl ghosted me... and I have no idea why... The last message I got from her was over a week ago "Last night was unreal, and I can't wait to do it again" and no attempts to reschedule have been responded to since. I wish I knew what to take away from this, she was super into the sex on a physiological level... it wouldn't be so much simpler if people would just say what the problem is, lack of closure drives me nuts.
I re-upped on SA to get back in the pool, and messaged her there that I didn't mind the unavailability but the total radio silence was bothersome, and I hoped she was alright. Checkmarked, read, also no response.... I mean I'm smart enough to know that this means not interested at the moment.... but she talked about repeating while we were together and in her last message... I can't make sense of it. ArggghIMO the chances of finding a lady on SA that isn't BSC to some degree or the other is slim. Throw on bi polar ladies, financial trainwrecks and hookers into the mix and it is best to never be surprised.
I'd have a shit load of fucking nickles.
Shrug it off, and move on
LEM, I am not surprised in the least because I maintain that money/allowance or whichever you wish to put it, is one of the fundamental motivators in SugarVille. I also understand that you are (or wish to) play with a more limited budget but you bring other factors into the foray, ostensibly fun companionship and great sex. So why not look at the positive side that with limited dispensable "investment" you still have managed to get some relatively inexpensive p*ssy on SA?
I lose and have lost SBs in the past to SDs with deeper pockets and I allow 500 which is not exactly a meager sum which incidentally in 'Diego will get me an hour with almost top tier hookers in our town. When I was allowing 300ish, I was losing more SBs to attrition and I came to learn that they are capable of lying through their teeth just to keep the peace (after BCD fun) in order to gather up their clothes before they GTFO and often ghost for good.
As long as you manage your expectations within the budget which you are playing with, you will not get hurt. Note that SftD's tales have not been too different to that of yours. He refers to them as BSC, bipolar and train wrecks whereas I rather refer to them simply as financial mercenaries.
That would be fine... if it weren't for her last text which was completely uncalled for if she had no intention to see me again. I don't have any problem understanding the finance portion of this, and would even be fine with her telling me she has better offers this week and would see me when she doesn't.
I don't care to be lied to, that's all. I just like to know the answers to things... the mystery drives me much crazier than not getting what I want ever would.
About 3 weeks ago I met a new POT SB. At the end of the date, I told her that I was offering 1K-1.5K per month in 2-3 allotments whence we meet. She had indicated to me that she was most def interested in my style of making it seem like a real date with overnight stays, etc...
I even gave a ride back to her place and she was telling me what a wonderful night she had and that she wanted to see me again soon. She was telling me all this sh*t all the while playing with her phone, which I thought was her texting. That night after I dropped her off, I texted her when I got back to my place to let her know that I got back safely and was looking forward to seeing her in the next couple of days to start our arrangement.
Well three weeks later on, I still have not heard back! LOL. And that thing about when I thought that she was texting during me being her Uber driver, I am now convinced that she must've been erasing my contact info and that the ride back was the actual crime scene! LOL!
Ckassic. Just like vegas biatches. Maybe. Just maybe. These young girls don't want to fuck old guys! Lol
I even gave a ride back to her place and she was telling me what a wonderful night she had and that she wanted to see me again soon. She was telling me all this sh*t all the while playing with her phone, which I thought was her texting. That night after I dropped her off, I texted her when I got back to my place to let her know that I got back safely and was looking forward to seeing her in the next couple of days to start our arrangement.
Well three weeks later on, I still have not heard back! LOL. And that thing about when I thought that she was texting during me being her Uber driver, I am now convinced that she must've been erasing my contact info and that the ride back was the actual crime scene! LOL!
She claimed to be 31 and looked to be in her 30's. I went against my own cardinal rule but the damage was only about $60 for some wine and appetizers plus like $20 for her Uber ride to the wine bar. Good news being that I lived for another day to tell this tale. My explanation? I was not her type so she lied tin order to keep the peace and also to get me to give her a ride back. No big deal!
Still too uoung. Just sayin. The long term SB model wont work lol.
Several times, I just "wasn't feeling it" in the looks department, but they weren't so hideous that I found myself running away screaming in terror. lol I have gone through the dates, made small talk along with the "best of the situation" and then simply done just like the SB's and ghosted on them.
I can and will tell a hooker she is too fat/ugly/old/fugly for me, but I have a hard time doing it to civvies or POT SB's. It just seems "mean" to me. and yes this is GaGambler, no one has hacked my account. lol I know I do have a reputation in Costa Rica and a couple of other places for being a bit rude to the fat ugly putas that hit on me at the bar, but unless the girl is overtly trying to sell me her pussy, I just feel bad telling a woman she is unattractive. I suppose many POT SB's feel the same way about POT SD's and then of course they are most likely worried about the physical risk involved in telling some old fuck he is too old and fat to sleep with, I am sure "some" guys don't take it too well.
Simply put I was injecting some anecdotal tales in the thread to soothe some of LEM's sufferings
I've had a few recently who ghosted after we'd had a really great arrangement going and what I thought was a good connection.And in both cases they sent me messages saying they really wanted to see me again, didn't want the separation to be permanent, etc. But then radio silence and no closure. Drives me nuts! Good thing I'm normally nuts, so no big deal.
One thing that is needed in the Sugar World is tolerance for ambiguity. These women don't reply or are slow to reply or they say something vague. Get used to it. It's the norm. As long as you have options, losing one or two is not a big deal. I recommend seeing a pro if you can't find a SB you like in the short run.
I Agree completely, and have already made an appt with my local atf ter girl! We'll ring in the new year with a bang! And I'm also setting up dates with a few new SBs. So multiple options is truly the only way to go. Tolerating ambiguity is a challenge for me though, which I'm trying to deal with by keeping the pipeline flowing!
I'm sure that a lot of SB's have been ghosted as well, by guys like us who have lost interest and find it easier to just disappear. Guilty as charged.
It's super frustrating when they ghost for no reason, but all I can say is keep the lines of communication open for her and you never know when she might pop back up. Even if she says she doesn't want your money, I would not believe that. The other thing you can do if you REALLY want to see her again is sweeten the pot a bit for her and then she may come back. Just remember, she's in it for the money even she if she says she's not.
She resurfaced a couple of months later and confessed she had thought about leaving her long time BF/fiancé to find an SD as he had been pressuring her to marry him, but that he had eased up and she had decided to give him another chance which is why she ghosted on me.
We hit it off wonderfully and we were very close to BF/GF status, which wasn't a huge leap as she never wanted any of my money, good wine, good pot and great sex was all she wanted. but sure enough, just when I was thinking we might have something, she ghosted on me again.
For the record, if she ever resurfaces again. Yeah, I'd see her again in a heartbeat. The sex was THAT good. lol
and no, she really wasn't in it for the money. She knew quite well I'd give her anything she asked for. I made that very clear that if she ever needed rent, a car payment, anything she wanted/needed all she needed to do was tell me and I'd take care of it, she never accepted a penny from me.