Would like to know what your thoughts are or if anyone has tried anything similar. Have a POT who is physically a 9.5. Emails, texts and phone call raise no red flags. She wants an amount that is $300-$400 more per meet than I am willing to pay. Thinking about accepting her offer and getting BCD activity. Would show her a great time, respect, and fun. I would then negotiate future meets at my preferred price. She will either accept or decline. If she declines, I move on. Thoughts?
I don't think the ladies on the SA are looking for "one and done". The initial meet under terms of $x is an implied agreement that if both parties enjoy the time, then thats the deal. What you propose is creative, but disrespectful. If you can't afford her, tell her. Just my opinion.
I am going to respectfully disagree with manshow on this one. A per meet arrangement is exactly that...there is no obligation on the part of either party to go through with a second date. While both hope that it is not a one and out, the reality is the OP owes her nothing more than respect and the agreed upon amount for the first date. I agree that, after meeting you, having a nice time and realizing you are safe and reliable, she may take less. In fact, i would argue that there is absolutely nothing wrong with respectfully attempting to renegotiate the terms of the "first contract" as long as you have fully met those obligations. Here, the risk seems to be overpaying (based on your comfort level and past arrangements) and then having a mediocre time. Are you willing to risk that?
Personally, I think manshow should give up his mancard. lol
I "renegotiate" with SB's all the time. This is not the hooker world where somehow the hookers have brow beaten the johns into actually believing that negotiating is somehow "rude and disrespectful" Those idiotic rules fortunately do NOT apply to the Sugar Bowl and a "fair" arrangement is simply what both parties feel comfortable with.
I doubt I would overpay by $3-400 for the first date, and I completely agree that there is a very big risk of both overpaying AND having a lousy time to boot, but hey it's the OP's money and he can do with it as he likes. I think it is a strategy that "can" work, but IMHO I think overpaying, just like paying for a date with no intimacy, sends a totally wrong message and gets the relationship off on the wrong foot with the SB feeling like she is "in charge"
Hookers have set prices and you can either take it or leave it. The Sugar Bowl is the opposite, I have a certain amount (which fluctuates depending on the "hotness" of the SB) of money I am willing to spend and the SB can either "take it or leave it" The key to success in the Sugar World is to be willing and able to walk if you can't come to terms. Women, all women, have no respect for a weak man, and they have an innate ability to sniff out weakness. If you are a spineless worm, they will sense it, as I am sure manshow can attest to. lol
If so, there is a risk of you becoming known for doing this and after a while, you'll be unable to find gals, at least not as easily.
By rights, what you suggest would seem legitimate, but there is a bit of odor about it, as if you are not being entirely forthright.
What is dishonest about agreeing to overpay ONCE, but reserving the right to bring things back to earth after overpriced trial run? No guy OWES an SB a second date, much less a neverending allowance unless he's happy with the arrangement.
Are you sure there isn't someone looking over your shoulder as you were writing this? I know how certain hookers feel about the way us TER guys approach the Sugar Bowl, and from THEIR perspective as women who do this for a living, I can understand it, but I COMPLETELY disagree with it.
This is a forum where the guys can discuss what works best for us, if the SB's want to create their own forum to create their own "Sugar Baby union" that's on them. There is more than enough "sucking up" on the rest of the boards, I will personally revoke the man card of anyone who attempts that kind of behavior here, even you fish. lol
Say Hi to "you know who" for me, and ask her to return your balls to you. lol
I said that it may be viewed (by the gals, anyways) as less than forthright, and that could lead to the OP being shunned by this and other gals, especially if they do back channel.
As for the morality of it, I make no judgement on this.
All's fair in love and war, and I'd include sex in that if it were up to me.
As for my man card, I hocked it and got $5 which paid for the gas to see my last date.
I'd ask for my balls back, but her cat got them, damned nuisances!
-- Modified on 5/7/2017 9:01:25 PM
The initial meet was to see how we clicked. If her bcd skills werent up to expectations then why would I continue at the same rate? Ive had a few SBs that wouldn't do bbbj and the sex was one and done. In those cases there is no negotiating. We dun!
First, why would you pay 300-400 more than you are willing to pay? We are looking for values in the Sugar Bowl and this just goes against that. I was tempted a couple times but decided to move on.
Second, even if you decide to overpay for the first BCD, you have absolutely no obligation to pay her the same amount next time you see her if the sex was good. As others have suggested, it is pay per date; you did not agree to a monthly allowance. Just say you cannot afford to pay her the same rate regularly and ask her if she will take less for regular meets. If she declines, move on.
I guess I'd go for the higher rate once. But I'd tell her in advance that it's a stretch for you. Maybe call it a "signing bonus" as has been previously suggested on this forum. Then I'd be perfectly comfortable with renegotiating for a lower rate in the future.
OP here. Thanks for everyone's feedback. Will proceed with the POT at her requested rate for our initial BCD and for subsequent meets, will either negotiate down or walk away. Can afford the $$, just don't think the ROI will be worth it long term. Rather spend my money on current SB, golf, wine and clothes.
Will report back with results of this strategy.
Will be interested to hear how it works out for you. I did this once. Very hot Asian woman (born and raised in US), who wanted 400 over my normal rate. I got her down to 200 over my rate and saw her twice. Off the charts fun BCD, but there are too many options where I live to continue to pay the higher rate, so twice was enough for me.
I usually pay more on the first BCD date and the drop the rate for other dates, if they occur. My reasoning is she now knows what I want, just good sex and nothing unusual. Most, but not all, also get a few orgasms out of the deal.
I have yet to have a girl complain about a lower rate for the second or third BCD date.
Follow up information on the alternate negotiation strategy. Had an initial meet for drinks with hot POT SB. Went well and we agreed for BCD meeting a few days later. She was absolutely outstanding! In subsequent email/phone conversations, I informed her that I wanted to continue seeing her, but at a lower rate that was closer to my normal PPM. She initially declined giving all of the reasons she "needed" the higher rate. I wished her well and good luck in the SB. Two days later, she contacted me and accepted the new terms. She is still $100 over my previous baseline, but I am OK. Her looks, attitude and performance are all fantastic.
Congratulations! Sounds like it played out the way you wanted it to. Despite being $100 over your "typical," I think most would agree that is a small price to pay for a real hottie and great sex. Enjoy
Congrats but I doubt it will add up on math. Say you paid $400 more than your normal rate, extra $100 on the 2nd date. You are still overpaying $250/date.
You would have date her more than 10 times to get the number close to $100 extra per date. But nonetheless this is a good strategy, I think I will try that on my normal allowance and re-negotiate for less on a 2nd date.
The math actually works for me, as I'm not looking to "average out" over time following the initial expenditure. Paid $300 over my typical fee for 1st date BCD. Negotiated down to my standard rate for subsequent dates and I now have a young hottie with incredible BCD skills at my price point. For me, that is $300 well spent. She is listed as "Substantial", but as others have pointed out, many SB's will take less than their profile request.
The better looking younger SBs do not want to do a first date for less as they probably know (true fact actually) that we men sometimes just like a variety and won't stick with one SB for long. So while we can sell them the high frequency of meets card, some girls just don't bite. And if that girl is really making your heart pound then sure go ahead and meet her for a bit more first time. I know this 20 year hot girl who wanted 500-600 for first date and was ready to see me for lower 300-400 later on. It also gives them assurance that they will make whatever their minimum monthly goal is.
But like others said, 300-400 is way high, like I wont see anyone for more than 600k first time unless it's a sleepover. I have gotten weekend dates for about 1K which is mostly a couple of nights with a full day together.