TER General Board

Recognizing a provider..Question for the providers.
Paxem 14 Reviews 4638 reads
posted

I was browsing through reviews etc...and opened a website link and lo and behold an old friend of mine appeared. She does not live in the city I am from but is in a city I travel to on occasion. We have not spoken in a number of years for no reason other then life goes on and as usual contact is often lost when friends move. She is a wonderful woman and I would love to at least chat with her but also respect the fact that some providers prefer anonymity from real life(for lack of better words) How would you feel if an old aquaintance contacted you via the hobby?

I often think wistfully about friends I've lost touch with. It would give me joy to be reconnected with a friend through this arena.  A seemingly chance event like that would only afirm my life choices and participation here.

Oh man... wow. I think this is a very delicate subject. It is truly going to have a lot to do with how well you knew her, and how you knew her, and whether or not she told you she was a provider in the past ... or if you knew at all, or if she was not then and is now.... or hid it from everyone and so on and so forth. If she hid it, or didn't then and does now, it is going to make her feel very uncomfortable to be approached by you through the business. If she told you, or was open about it, or knew you knew, it should be fine.
How badly do you want to see her?
If you really MUST see her and are willing to risk her being embarrassed or offended, go ahead. You might want to preface the discussion with, "hey just so you know, I don't judge you for being a provider and I would never tell anyone ...."
You will have to weigh the desire to see her against the possibility of her not wanting to see you... and if you want to see her badly enough, go ahead. Or you could have someone you know that doesn't know her contact her and he could somehow mention your name to her and get her reaction....
Just a thogut or two.
Um.... personal experiance here .... was working in Vegas.... a guy I dated a few times (and really liked)  was in town with friends ... they called ... I showed up ... DIED of embarrassment ..... never saw him again.
Every situation is unique. There may be another way to contact her without it being through the business. Maybe you can find out where she hangs out and just "bump" into her.... I don't know ... good luck!

Be honest.
Tell her how you ran across her name and let her know you just want to say hi.

Anais_nin3178 reads

I think a sense of panic would set in :)  heh.  I think perhaps the best way to get back in touch is to somehow look her up and see if she is listed in any other way (non hobby related) on the internet or phone number and go from there.  That way if you call her up and have lunch on one of your visits, you can leave it up to her to decide if she let's you in on her various activities and if not, you'll know that you are respecting her privacy.

If I was good friends or if I got along real well with someone I met through these exciting circumstances, such as the provider, hobbyist relationship, I would love to reconnect, if we went our seperate ways.  But it might not be the smartest thing to get a hold of your friend. Unless she has a number or website with an address that states hobbyists can contact her, I would just remember the memories you have of her.  This special lady may be in a committed relationship where you contacting her could prove dangerous.  So dont do it unless it reads somewher for you she doesnt mind people getting in touch with her.

Anya3537 reads

I wouldn't mind at all, but I'm probably in the minority.

-Anya

Thank you all for the insight. I looked her number up in the regular phone book and she is not listed. I did not know she was a provider, I assume that she entered the profession after I saw her last. We were never romatically involved, platonic all the way, but always had a great time when we saw each other or talked. I have given this thought since my first post and after reading the responses I think I will let this one lay(pardon the pun) and see if some mutual friends have means of contacting or a different non-hobby manner. I hope this is also helpful to other who may be in a similar situation someday. Respect and benefit of the doubt rule the day in my book. Thanks again[EOM]


by pretending that you don't know she's a provider you can "get away" by not paying for her precious time

Im guessing her email addy is her provider address and not her "real life" one, so rather then risk it Ill do some investigating. Im really not interested in seeing her as a hobbyist, more so to just say hello and catch up on life.


if you only KNEW what an insidious farce is being perpetrated on this board by 'old-timers' you'd be saying:   "tactful, tactful, tactful"

LOL

Rick7772279 reads

Singleton, Megapig and Cynicalman are all my hero's.  They are funny and pass along a lot of good information.  But thats me.

Hey Rick777, you got a little something on your nose.  

I agree wholeheartedly about Megapig and Cynicalman.  Megapig and Cynicalman are certainly both sensitive, caring, renaissance men with God-like intellects of a length and girth never before seen and rarely even imagined.  Singleton is just a squirrelly little fucker, but he's got some serious nuts on him.

Note to the humorless:  This was a JOKE.  This was not meant as an insult to the testically impaired urban rodents who need our love and understanding, and more importantly our financial support.  This was meant as an insult to Megapig and Cynicalman.


-- Modified on 9/21/2003 6:29:43 PM

Rick7772927 reads

Is that anyone you know?

Cynicalman 2.04811 reads


N U T S    &     B A L L S


to have balls enough to be nuts!  

;-)

elegantelise4828 reads

I say go for it even if all you have is her provider email address.

"Say WOW is that you? It's ME, Paxem! How wonderfully resourceful you are!!  I think it's GREAT what you're doing!! KUDOS!

I'd love to see you to catch up on life on a PURELY platonic basis next time I'm in your town! How about we get together for drinks if you've got some free time, my treat!"

You know, we often feel the same way you guys do. And this type of lifestyle can be somewhat isolating.

If she's anything like me, she may offer to pay for YOUR drinks and maybe even your dinner!

Peace,
Elise

Ill give that some thought, thanks. I'll even give singletons suggestion some thought too (ohhhh do I have an evil grin right now~wink~)

...in terms of contacting her via her email. OK, she escorts....you contact her......what is there to think? I don't see why she would want to crawl under a rock and deny anything. Remember, she may be an escort, just explain that you found her while you were looking for an escort. Level the field. It just doesn't seem like an issue of two worlds colliding to me.

-- Modified on 9/21/2003 11:47:14 AM

It happend last week someone I once was involved with who is now married and living on the east coast found my working name on some msg borad did a google search and saw my face.  The uncle of a friend in high school.  Someone I interviewed with for a job. So far it has been mostly innocent. I must mention I went to the doctor, and the next day received and email....he is now a client.

Yes you are correct providers prefer anonymity from real life.  If I were in her shoes I would not want you to contact me via the hobby. However I am not her nor do I know your backround with her. Maybe she was a dancer friend and now a provider in that case I am sure she would love to hear from you..each situation and each girl is different.

I was able to get her regular email address, through her mom of all people lol.(It is in fact not her provider email address but her personal.) I sent a message and we have been relaying emails back and forth and talked on the phone earlier today. We will likely get together for dinner on my next trip. I have not nor will I mention knowing about her profession and let things just develop. There are plenty of providers out there and I will do nothing to cause any anxiety for her. Thank you all for your suggestions and feedback (I do have to admit thought that singletons suggestion is still on my mind ;) )[EOM]

MisterGuy4965 reads

if she'll bang anybody for money she might as well bang you for free bro. Taker her out on a date,,, could be an easy lay.

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