Jesus fucking Christ on a cracker, the descriptions some of your ladies put in your ads are amazing. I don't know wether I'm going to get laid or read MacBeth to followed by interpretive dance.  

The best is when they break out the thesaurus and you follow the link to selfies taken with an iPhone 4 in a bathroom mirror. Good thing you used the word rubenesque otherwise I would have though you were just fat.

The weather has been absolutely amazing this spring I bet summer will be a BLAST!!!

To Vegas, and it's already hitting the 80's.

Happy to hear, Delaney, you're enjoying lovely weather too.

and I personally wouldn't be opposed to Shakespeare before or after fucking. And I'm sure Shakespeare during fucking could make for quite a kinky and fantastical time!

p.s. Don't come for me unless I send for you.

p.p.s. Miss me with "fat" as a pejorative.

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Check out my “vice and verse” package. Currently featured is the alliterative verse form in pre-Norman conquest Europe, which includes a naked staged reading of “Beowulf” in its original Old English.  
Now that’s hot (or fyrenlust, as the Anglo Saxons would have said.

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Do you REALLY have 3 balls?

http://hystericalliterature.com

fyi I posted this once before but imho it's worth a re-run  

Marne is my fav ...

Hey beautiful! It's always sunny in fabulous Las Vegas!   Let's turn it out this weekend,  here's to another day above ground!

or at least, I'd love to fuck you..

I'm not sure about "Beowulf", but I do know Shakespeare wrote porn for the masses. He just made it sound prettier than Jacqueline Susann or Harold Robbins..

No, the 2 I have are so big a girl once asked me "do you have 3 in there ?

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