I know why providers got into this buz. The money is good. But how did you get into this buz the first time? Your girl friend did it and you joined her? You were actively recruited by an agent? You responded to ads in the paper or internet? You started out in the strip club and naturally progressed into providing? or others?
I imagine from the providers perspective that it can be terrifying to get into this buz the first time because of the unknow, the scare of STDs, and the scarre of meeting total strangers who could be a pervert that hurt you. I can explain why men got into this hobby because we are dogs and has the biological urge to spread the seeds. Women won't do it unless they have the economic needs. I am curious on how providers overcome the fear and got into this buz the first time.
BUZ-Get a life- Don't be presumptious and live vicaroiusly off the bio s of others- Content analysis of your post reveals that you are the one who is most scared !! I am sure everytime you go to your doctor or your lawyer you ask the same question--" Aren't you scared of having me as a client and by the way had did you get in the Buz "?
Be grateful there are providers out there who will give us pleasure. The reasons are unnecessary for the consumer. Perhaps you will find out from an ATF but that is irrelevant. Or maybe this is for that term paper you never completed; Or maybe for 60 Minutes ? Now, what is your favorite soap ? and did you ask your Mom why she gave birth to you ? lol
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 11:30:47 AM
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 2:32:06 PM
I am asking a very sencere question, and I'm sorry I got on the nerve of a few ladies in a profession I respect. I think the profession provides a great service to the society. The profession fulfills the biological needs and pleasure to many men without breaking the marriage. The first time is always tough. I am just curious on how providers have the nerve to get into this buz the first time. I was very nervous the first time to seek commercial sex. Having been monogamous with one woman for 18 years, it was tough for me to make the first decision to try commercial sex. I recalled my heart was pounding for hours waiting for the lady to knock on my hotel room door. I was so nervous that I almost couldn't cum if not because the lady knew I was first time client and patiently comforted me. I would imagine that the first time as a provider would be difficult.
I am surprised that the few replies I recieved were so nasty. Was the first expericence as a provider to some ladies so traumatic that they are sensitive to even bringing it up?
You started your first post by stating, " I know why providers got into this buz. The money is good.".
Isn't money why anyone works in any profession?
Don't people generally want to earn the most they can in a chosen feild?
Why should this business be any different?
People tend to work in careers where either they are good at it, or they enjoy it, and for the very lucky, both. Doesn't it follow that it is entirely possible that is why a number of the ladies in this line of work are in it? (From some reviews I have read, and some posts made by the ladies themselves here, I would say a number of them fit in that "lucky" catagory of both enjoying and being good at what they do.)
You also in your posts use words like, "terrifying", "scare", "fear", "nerve", "difficult" and "traumatic"....why do you assume it must be a bad experience?
Why do you assume that it is something that the ladies have to overcome?
That it is purely negative?
If I were inclined to play amateur psychologist....which, as it turns out I actually am *grin*, I would say that your choice of words and apperant predilection to believe the worst of the profession , says more about your own preconceived negative veiws of this line of work than anything about the ladies themselves.
If I really wanted to make a conclusion about you from this....which again it seems to be that I do *grin*, I would ask you if this idea that being a provider is so terrible adds to your personal excitement, that perhaps you get an extra thrill from the idea that the women are somehow damaged by what they do?
You also stated in your first post, "Women won't do it unless they have the economic needs."
Huh?
No women can actually enjoy this line of work?
I'm thinking you were one of those men raised to believe that women only have sex as part of their "wifely duties" and do not enjoy it.
Not all men will have sex with anyone that will let them, and not all women will only have sex with someone they "really love" and then only because that person wants it, or because they are forced to endure it for "economic needs".
"I think the profession provides a great service to the society. The profession fulfills the biological needs and pleasure to many men without breaking the marriage.", might the profession not also fulfill the needs and pleasures of the ladies in it?
Woman do have needs, and experience pleasure...you know that right?
As to why you got the replies that you did, perhaps the ladies were a bit put off by the supposition of negativity.
Perhaps it was because sharing one's "life story" and how they came to be in where they are in their lives, for some, is a very emotionally intimate expression, and in a profession where the lines between business and real intimacy can already be blurry to some, may not have seemed the best idea.
(Just a few thoughts though, I could be completely off the mark on this....I probably am...I am usually off the mark...that's what kept me from pursuing a career in archery or skeet shooting.)
He asks a really good question! The ladies in the business are PEOPLE, not objects that you use for your pleasure. It must be really scary at times when things are not pleasant during an appointment. I always wonder how these ladies can remain so strong, and be emotionally detached after sexual encounters. I must take extreme will-power to stay in this business.
Indeed providers are necesities in a civilized society. Too bad there are too many conservatives who just can't see the good side of this business. I wish I could just chat with a provider for hours to really understand the emotional side of this business. Whether or not Tigerguy is doing research, I don't care. I'm just really fascinated by the people in this business. Before I started this hobby, I thought providers were all disease-stricken, smelly, low-class desperate drug-users. Obviously this is nowhere near the truth, at least when it comes to reputable providers. This hobby has really opened my eyes to this world that not many people understand.
my 2 cents.
The reasons are going to span from "because I like it....to because I had to" Kind of reasons. To me, this isn't something that is open for public discussion. It's avery VERY personal decision and to even ask the question, smacks of insensitive disregard for the provider. Why do people become Catholic or Muslim? Why do some like doggie and some like mish? Would a frog jump is he has a glass ass? We would ask questions all day long and never get true answers.
I have a suggestion. When your with a provider next time, ask her this question. Do this everytime you see a provider and then you might just start to understand the sensitivity. Providers do what they do for their own personal reasons.
While your at it...Go ask a Vet if he killed anybody in Vietnam, or the Gulf. Go ask a priest if he molested a kid today. Ok maybe these are a bit extreme. I wonder if this is going to make it thru the sifter....
Just to field irratating questions from guys like you. I could see the session now: a question for every five minutes. My head hurts.
Wait was there a question there?
LoL
I got into the biz so I could meet chick a dee's like Nettie.... When I grow up, I want to be just like her.
Seems like a pretty legit question.... Whenever anybody is in an unusual line of work (film industry, firejumper, horse whisperer), it would seem that others would be curious as to the path that led to that line of work.... Anyway, if some think it presumptious, perhaps, to them, it is, but other providers may be interested in sharing their stories -- so why not just let Tigerguy enjoy such posts or PM's as come his way without all the shit? Hmmmm? MA
I'm with you on that, MA! No need to get riled up about a polite question. I doctor screenplays, and people ask me all the time how I got into the business. Okay, after telling my lifestory for the umpteenth time, it gets a bit monotonous, but why should I be offended? Same thing with providers. We're not a very judgmental crowd here - at least when it comes to morals - so why not invite someone to share?
I had been wanting to ask this question for awhile but I thought it would be best asked on a provider's board. I needed a car because mine died. I was a waitress working at a place where nobody tipped at all. It was a really cheap eating place where the average waitress made $75 a week. Then my car threw a rod and I had to get up extra early to take the bus and I hated it. I was looking through the paper for another waitress job and our papers have wait jobs and escort ads next to each other. In bold print was an ad, MAKE LOTS OF MONEY MODELING LINGERIE. $1,000 A WEEK. I called because that was good money and it would definitely be enough to get me in a ride. I called on my break and made an appointment. After work I changed and took the bus over. Got the job. It turned out to be a jack shack. Threw caution to the wind and quit my wait job. The modeling job was slow at first then it picked up. I ended up leaving there because the money wasn't coming in for me. I had a D cup and a 22 inch waist but because the place looked like a rat's nest and there were very tight restrictions, the customers didn't stay. I found the Excitement magazine and ended up getting another job up north. It was way bigger and nicer. They advertised heavily and all the girls made good money. There were no restrictions. At my first jack shack job I could only go topless and the guys could only touch my breasts. I had to keep my bottoms on. In fact I couldn't even watch him jacking off. He had to cover himself up with a towel because laws in that county were very strict and serious. At this job a guy could touch my boobs, put them in his mouth (which felt really good)and I could not only watch him jack but do it for him and I got paid very well for it and the rooms were unmonitored unlike the first one which had two way mirrors. One guy came in and offered me money to let him DATY. I thought OMG this guy is paying me to eat my pussy! It was great. I paid off my car in about 6 months but I was enjoying the other perks as well. lol I had guys ask me about FS but never thought seriously about doing it until one day a client came in waving enough money for me to take him up on his offer of FS. It helped that the customer was cute and well hung. I worked there for a good while until it got busted. (Only the manager was arrested) I went to another place and my clients followed. My new manager, of all people, gave me hell because she was doing lots of sessions then some of her guys started seeing me. Then she and I had a big falling out and I left. It might have had something to do with me sleeping with her boyfriend. I still wanted to see clients so I started entertaining at my house doing both outcall and incall which I still do now. I had always said that once I get my car and pay it off I will leave the business but I am still here. I have three cars and all are paid off. I paid off my mortgage early this year. I helped get my parents out of debt. I have money in the bank and my life is very good.
YRMM, Thanks for sharing. Sounds like a movie of the week, or at least a good country song. 
This part is hot! "At this job a guy could touch my boobs, put them in his mouth (which felt really good)and I could not only watch him jack but do it for him and I got paid very well for it and the rooms were unmonitored unlike the first one which had two way mirrors. One guy came in and offered me money to let him DATY. I thought OMG this guy is paying me to eat my pussy! It was great."
LJ
and they get off on childish attacks on others. Its a legitimate question that maybe providers get too often but none the less didn't deserve such nasty answers.
Hope they feel better now
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 2:21:25 PM
i would bet that a good percent of them had some sort of trauma in their past be it sexual abuse or physical, i would also bet that most grew up with out a father. if you want the real answer call love line on kroq and ask dr. drew
But for me not true. I came from a "good" Christian home, with "loving" parents, who sent me to a "good" school. I just couldn't fit into the box they picked out for my life. So I went my own way and Im much happier for it.
And I would bet you are wrong. I grew up with both my parents. I had no kind of abuse. I was called Princess because my daddy spoiled me rotten and to this day I am still spoiled. My father and I have a very good relationship and I almost always take his side when he and my mom argue. We talk all the time. There is nothing in this world I wouldn't do for him and vice versa.
If your father spoiled you rotten, your relationship with him has issues.
Perhaps among SW's this would be true, but they are a different breed from the independent providers. One diligent provider here (Dani) wrote here about her failure trying to bring SW's up into independent provider status. Conclusion: one does not become the other. If women do pick themselves up from SW's, it would be to get out of the sex industry completely.
Think about what you are saying. How could it ever make sense to life revolving around sex when you associate it with pain and horror? It doesn't. The only people who'd do this are those so crippled by the experience that they can't get a real job, they are desperate to eat, or kill the pain, or get the non-sexual pleasure of drugs: namely, the street-walkers. This does not fit the pattern of an independent provider.
My observation is: the independent provider's life before she takes up her stilettoes is typically (gasp) not much different from other women. Many live double lives-- a hard thing to manage if they're damaged from childhood-- I hope you agree. The only difference I would expect with them with the general population is a lack of an attachment to or a downright rejection of mainstream religion.
Then one day, at a varying age, perhaps by happistance, they discover that they can make money, a lot of money with sex. Perhaps after that, then they discover, with further experience, that they can do the work. Many also discover that they can enjoy it a lot of the time, and that they feel good about it, who actually love the fact that they bring pleasure to people.
There are the exceptions to this. There are a few who find out a bit after puberty hits that they really love sex. And then it's a blessing to them, if they're not too proud or too morally hung up, they realize they can get paid for it, too. These women are real treasures to find.
Of the independent providers I've met now, about a dozen, I'd say that there was only one who was sexually traumatized in early life. And it was an impediment for, not a drive to a thriving career as a provider.
/Zin
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 11:22:37 PM
I would be very keen to respond to your post, because I think my response, and that of many of the women on this board would dispel many of the myths you hold so dear. But it seems you've already made up your mind. Frankly, your mind isn't just closed, it's shrink wrapped
... found out, much to my shame, how it turned me on (8 hour tricks 5 days per week). I've tried to stop, many times -- BUT I JUST CAN'T WALK AWAY FROM IT!!!
Christ, somebody help me.
Harry
first it's 40 hours a week of vanilla, associate, stuff and before you know it you're hooked. Then it's a slow slide till you make senior partner and it takes over your entire life. Before you know it you're working 80+ hours a week and pushing the concept to other fresh, naive graduates. One day you wake up, still in your dark grey skirt suit, matched with cream high cut top, nude pantihose, mid-heeled black pumps and discreet pearl jewellery, next to the shredder where you'd fallen asleep after spending all night 'preparing' for an audit. It's then you have your epiphany....
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 6:38:57 PM
... I will never forget the first time the senior people let me finish the blow job we were giving to the client. I was scared and excited at the same time. Would I like the taste? Would I gag in those last few moments? Did I have a clean hanky to wipe off my face if he decided to pull out before he came? Even worse, what if he DIDN't cum? Would I lose the promotion? Would I make partner?
I was SO lucky. The client was very thoughtful: he even remembered to drink some pineapple juice that morning. He wiped me off with his own hanky. Even today, I can still fill the little bite marks where he nibbled on my ear after he kissed me.
The promotion came through. I was hooked. I got a chance to hire some junior people. As part of their training, I spent many sessions with all of them, teaching them the right way to close the sale.
There have been down times. But the highs -- those highs! They are SO addicting!
They got me through the first case of thrush on the back of my throat when the doctor told me not to take it so deeply.
Thanks for caring Emma.
Harry
Harry...you da man!
Cheers!
PM me and I'll try to help.
and why so often one party thinks their saying one thing, and the other party interprets it differently.
Guys, instead of making snide comments about providers' insecurity, first experiences, horrific childhoods full of abuse and neglect etc etc (yawn) why not read his initial post and try and understand why women find it so offensive. It might give some useful insights into the way women think and, more importantly, how not to piss them off
The first sentence is "I know why providers got into this buz" To most women this kind of statement is inflammatory. It implies that a) his question is largely rhetorical and therefore its real purpose is to demonstrate his certain grasp of our life histories, b) his list of reasons for making the leap doesn't include any that might have been the motivation for an intelligent, adventurous & resourceful women and c) the underlying assumption is that it's all about the $$$.
Yes, I see that in a later post, Tigerguy expresses himself with a little more tact and hopefully this might draw out some informative, entertaining and interesting responses.
Few questions in the history of providing has ever been more irritating to providers than "How did a nice girl like you get into a business like this?"
If you've ever watched "City Confidential", you'd know that a famous "nymphomaniac" in Fort Lauderdale went into the profession because she felt like it. (By the way, her husband was a sheriff's deputy.) I'm sure there are some providers who have been abused and/or desperate for money, but there are others who went into providing because it sounded like fun.
Imagine if you had asked a politician, a doctor, or professor, "How did you get into this business?" This, while assuming that becoming a politician, doctor, or professor is a result of childhood abuse or greed. Some do it to pay the bills, but assuming that everybody needs to pay the bills, many professionals do what they do because they really believe they are doing something that will make a world a better place.
It may be hard for you to believe that the police officer who arrests you is thinking that your arrest is his small contribution to making the world a better place to live, but that is often the case. Earlier in my life, I considered going into law enforcement. The reason? I was desperate and I needed the money. Luckily, a better option opened up and my life has gone in a different direction.
Just think, if my life had gone a little bit different way back when, I might have become one of the policemen watching this board. And some provider I would have been busting could be asking, "How did a nice guy like you get into a profession like this?"
...not ALL of us working girls are here for the money. Some of us truly enjoy having this profession; we like sex, we love to meet new people and try new things, and we like to please and be pleased. But instead of going around doing it for free, we choose to make a living off of it (especially if we are very good at it). Take a chef for instance, they became chefs because they like to cook, and they are good enough at it to charge; they put two and two together and instead chose to go somewhere with their love for their artform and talent instead of creating dishes for free and so forth; just the same with any profession where the person enjoys what they do (teacher, writer, actor, contract killer), whatever the pay may be its not because of the money, but because they can get paid to do something they enjoy.
I just had a similar conversation, by the way, arguing with a friend of mine (who knows what I do) on the subject that selling sex wasn't any different than any other profession, as he states it "sluts do it on impulse" for free, but when they become whores its all of a sudden a charge; he went on telling me that prostitutes that like sex should just do it for free, for the hell of it, since if they met a guy they liked they would do it anyway... it of course became a rather heated conversation and went on for hours until I just agreed to disagree, but thats a WHOLE other topic for another day.
Aaaaaany how... True, I am using this as a stepping stool to bigger and better things in the near future (hopefully), but that doesn't mean I am ONLY doing this for the money, I love this and find it truly gratifying...
Dani
I origionally got in for financial reasons. I had a girlfriend who was working for an agency in Phoenix. She took me with her and I sat in and observed the first two calls, then did my own for the agency. Found I had a better time than regular dating most of the time. Then worked & did the June Cleaver thing for a number of years, then came back on the scene about 2 1/2 yrs ago as an independant. Same thing, financial got me back in, but being an independant has been a much nicer experience than the agency stuff was. Now, all I want is a very HOT, SEXY, generous man to keep me in the lifestyle to which I have become accustomed, who travels alot and doesn't mind if I see my favorites while he is out of town seeing NetMichelle and the likes of her.
You do not trump your intelligence, but you always give intelligent answers to reasonable questions.
Most of the women did not have your self-confidence, and so were offended by the question.
Every voyeur starts out just curious, and many of the professional curious can degenerate into voyeurs at any time.
You have to understand, Tiger, a provider's life depends on her secrecy as well as her sex. For that reason alone, you are not going to get many of them who will answer this thread, mostly, they are not going to tell you, en masse, much about who they were. Better to find this out from providers individually when they trust you with it. I mean, it's a lot like asking Batman who he was when he first decided to put his ridiculous costume together and start punching bad guys-- and the comparison is more apt than it first appears.
Besides, if they feed your curiosity with this, they will never know when the voyeur can't get enough.
/Zin
-- Modified on 1/14/2005 11:55:13 PM
I believe the whole problem with this thread is a misunderstanding of the question. I believe Tigerguy's initial question was, what was the immediate series of events that led you to get into the business. He believed that learning these series of events would help him to understand what providers did to get through that "knot in the stomach" feeling.
Unfortunately, he prefaced his question with a statement that is inflamatory. Saying that all providers got into the business for the money is like saying all doctors, lawyers and computer programmers etc. got into their businesses for the money, and not for loving or even liking what they are doing first. He then further dug himself into a hole by saying that all men are dogs and solely want to spread their seed. Basically he reduced sexual relations to a simple equation: for men sex=pleasure and for women sex=money. I believe the reason everyone got so upset is because people's reasons that for getting involved in this hobby, that he assumed so casually, are actually more complex.
For me, most simply put, I got into the business of providing because I was a horny teenager who needed loving, sexually satisfying attention from older men, and I was also unsatisfied with my current employment. The catalyst for my involvement was my girl friend giving me a book about sex work. It talked about how sex work could actually be quite feminist, empowering and enjoyable. The night before my first job I went to a party. I had to leave early because I was so nervous that I was making myself nauseous. But the next day, I took a lot of deep breaths, and sucked it up and went for it.
Excellent Aboutface! I also read The Happy Hooker when I was very young, and saw the movie Klute. And somehow knew in my late teens that I would someday be a whore. I wanted to do that somewhere in my psyche, and it didn't have anything to do with the money at that time, as I had no concept what money could do! But long before I ever had sex, knew I was a very sexual person.
I ultimately got over the fear of going for it when I met a girl that was working and she taught me the ropes. I also was driven by financial need. Watching her routine got me over the fear very quickly as it was all quite nice and natural.
My first call was a sweet young boy of about 23. Girls did not kiss at all during that time, even though no one was using condoms. I did not know this, and kissed that boy like I loved him. He called me back the next day and many times thereafter.
To be honest, one of the reasons I like being a whore now, is because I get treated better than I ever dreamed of being treated by a husband once the honeymoon was over. I recieve compliments, kind gifts, go to dinner and have great conversations on a day to day basis.
It is hard to give that up. I have had a couple of occassions since I came out in the last couple of years to marry men I have met in this arena. But I have a terrible time with that because I don't want to go back to the humdrum. I really don't!
You should travel, I am sure that many hobbyists outside the OC would love to spend time with you. The conversation alone would make the time more than well spent.
I have to agree with Emma. The way you put the question one would think things like:
well what else could women do for money ?
they are scared, weak, pliable, easily led, and so on.
those ideas and other implicit ones are indeed male stereotypes that serve a purpose you would not want to expose.
Currently I do this part-time, I also work for a fine upstanding company and have a senior positon there, I also hate the politics and the kowtowing just to keep one's job. But I am well-educated, and actually what excites me a lot isn't a nice cock really but intellect, I love fucking intellect, I love artists, artists of any gender.
I first thought of being a Whore when I read Xaviera Hollander's pink book, 'the happy hooker' when it came out. My mind and my body felt the power of her taking control of her body and her life and doing what she wanted. She was the one in control, not anyone else, also her 'in your face' about it attitude appealed to me a great deal. I was NOT going to end up a simple housewife or go quietly.
It took me awhile to permit myself my power to do the same.
I enjoy meeting men on an equal basis, I enjoy shattering their ideas of who we are. I am a Whore and I own the word. I'm proud of it. I have a lineage that goes back to the sacred temples.
I have met some outstanding men, and some not so.
I have tried 'dating' from time to time, but I get much more respect from clients than I do from the gentleman out of match.com or anyone else I've met.
a few years ago I stayed with Xaviera in Amsterdam and gave her back rubs, it was great, we shared stories about the biz.
what's your story tigerguy ? what do you do to feel alive ?
a bientot
Aut.
Quote: "I love artists, artists of any gender"
Quote: "what do you do to feel alive ?"
Can I answer?
(In the possibly unlikely event you would respond affirmatively to my last querry of my answering, I shall supply it here, now to save time and space.)
Drawing, Painting, Printamking, Digital Art (Figure Artist)
(sorry, I couldn't resist. The vast majority of people I meet generally not only don't "love" artists, but when I tell them I am an artist, look at, and on occasion treat, me as if that translates to "looser". I do hope that you don't make any conditions like they have to be "good" artists though, as I am really pretty much just a talentless hack with a passion for art.
Which is why I work in computer graphics and webdesign. *insert sheepish grin hrere*)
WT, you're fine, call me for an appt.
I didn't realize that a statement "Providers provide because the money is good" can be offensive. Many doctors and lawyers provide because the money is good, at least it is the driving motive notwithstanding other positive attributes like prestige and challenging work. I am not asserting that providing has no other positive attributes like picking one's time and schedule, realizing the female power, and meeting gentlement who can be intelligent, interesting and educated professionals. But a lady won't know it until she gets into the buz. Before she became a provider, she probably believed that all Johns are pervert, rude and ugly who have trouble getting laid. The work carries legal, emotional, safety and desease risks. Not so, many providers soon found out. But taking the first step to get into this buz can be terrifying. I am sure not only fellow hobbyists but also providers are curious of sharing the first experience.
I have absolutely no doubt that providers already know all they want and need to about first experiences. I would suggest that you get into the biz and then write about yours. I do beleve that most men would not be able to do it, also that they believe it's just a fun fun time with lots of cash coming my way. I don' feel like sharing anything more with you for your private amusement. I also noticed that you didn't answer my question.
Aut.
mid-life crisis is not a synonym for epiphany.
What an insulting post to Emma. You have attempted to marginalize her and create your image of her life to fit your mental model, then say 'she is not representative', nice.
Pity the poor ho's, crack pipes in hand, age 30 or less, destitute with no future. I know many women, not girls by the way, with 2 or more degrees and who are very creative people, with a more accurate sense of life and where they want to put themselves in it than most men. I prefer the company of whores come to think of it, then there is the question; "what are men so attracted to this archetype ?"
Tiger is, if you thought about it, as insulting to men as women. Men just 'have' to spread their seed ? that's all you're about ? sort of a mindless reptilian brain ?
and tiger is by the way not of the same strata as William Gladstone.
Personally I feel Gladstone's work, his 'rescue work' as it were, was due to both his feelings of personal guilt and his fondness for pornography and his subsequent shame as common in 185X, read up on the discipline applied to the 'rescued' women at the Houses of Mercy. Remember that even in his diaries, he felt he had to use codes. Being English/Scottish/Irish myself, I can say that the English are not the saving grace of civilization.
since multiple providers have now read his original post and responded in the negative, does that not suggest something ?
I must be off to meet my pimp and drug dealer, he is most cross if I am late and he knows I am worthless without him.
Aut.
Autumn,
It works both ways you know...yes, I love a hot woman (I have to since I am a pornographer) but I much more enjoy an intelligent woman that can challenge me mentally. I can sleep with any number of hot women, but when the sex is over...what then? I wish you the best in your life, you sound like a wonderful person!
-- Modified on 1/16/2005 2:27:58 AM
When I kept a blog, people would ask this all the time. I'm surprised it triggered such a response here.
I got into it indirectly. I was in grad school, I had bills/rent/debt, and I needed to make some cash. The problem was that I also needed a flexible schedule so I could get my academic work done, so I browsed classifieds for temp jobs and ended up pursuing different gigs. I started in part-time modeling, and gently pushed the line over time. I crossed over into roleplay and fetish, and when that went well, I found myself having coffee with a woman to discuss her proposition. I'm glad I did.
This work has never made me nervous or afraid. I was probably drawn to it because it's vaguely taboo and risky, and that gets me off. The money matters, but it's certainly not the only reason I do it.
Your seed theory is a little wacky, though. I have an outrageous libido - always have - and I'm not the only provider with a sexual appetite.
The seed theory is not a wacky one nor my theory. It came from evolutionary biologists who explain why men are naturally infedil because men have the biological urge to spread the genes as widely as possible. Sperms are inexpensive biological investment in comparison to eggs. Monogamy is an exception in the mammal kingdom. Monogamy is imposed by the society and women on men to keep them around to help raise the offsprings. Human babies are the weakest and slowest in development that need bi parrent effort to raise one child. This may explain why human is the only primates in which the female are receptive to sex all year round to lure men into staying around.
Prostitution is the most unusual line of work. The money is good but the stigma is bad. This is not a glamorous job that providers would talk about it with their friends and relatives. Yet, many providers earn more than their clients without having to invest years of education and experience. I thought that providers are all used to this negative stigma that I am shocked to find out some providers took my question as an insult. True, there is a lot of myth about this profession among the general public. Only providers and John who interact with providers truely understand and respect the profession.
Lately, the porn industry image has changed for the better. Some porn stars became celibrity and a few have entered mainstream entertainment industry. A few have even run for office in U.S and abroad. But the porn industry is legal in U.S. but not prostitution. So a change of image will not likely happen soon in the most religious conservative developed country in the world.
the same as agreeing with it. People who have a chip on their shoulders get in the way of good discussions.
Assuming the seeding theory is correct, men are just acting out their mammal instinct to seek variety. Women aren't naturally polygamous. Even lesbians act more like heterosexual women than gay men as lesbians tend to be monogamous, whereas gay men are notoriously promiscous. So in this biz, women are paid to act against their instinct. In my years of hobbying, I met many ladies who have moved on. The drop out rate is high. After a while, money doesn't mean everything anymore.
The ladies who frequent this board are probably the minority. They seem to genuenly enjoy the work and not just the money. But the stigma is always there. This board allows a rare opportunity for providers and clients alike to air their feeling about a biz they can't talk openly with their friends and relatives.
I believe that culture has a lot to do with men being "naturally polygamous" and women not. Someone is more likely to act a certain way, if it is expected of them.
You are right though. I do not feel comfortable discussing my job with my family and most of my friends. This is why I love coming to the TER boards. I am working to change my ability to discuss with civvies, but it's not easy to get past all the stigma. But the stigma will only go away if we talk about it!
However, your generalizing and hyperbolic statements such as "prostitution is the most unusual line of work" are the reason for all these people who have a "chip on their shoulder" to be all up in your face about it. Considering how many prostitutes there are, it's not unusual. I would say that someone who sniffs dog breath or dust bones at the Smithsonian for a living (from a description of the book Odd Jobs) would be classified as an "unusual line of work"