I found this post on a providers journal and it really struck a chord with me.
I think the post it too long to cut and paste but here's the part I'm talking about.
"Men customarily fail to realize that every bawdy little slut has a good girl lurking inside her and every good girl has within her a filthy tramp waiting to emerge...she may just mistakenly feel that she needs permision. I honestly believe that if men could recognize their wives as the wanton cock loving tarts that they frequently want to be, they'd eliminate much of my income." From a post called "Your wife, the wanton slut".
I'm really curious if others here feel that if things ever actually fell apart with their relationship, their wives would actually do all the stuff that you see providers for, but with some other guy. And how could you convince her that things could be better if she'd do them with you?
As I've learned through the years, she's most often convinced when I put my dishes in the sink, or compliment her on her hairdo.
It has been said men are typically "left-hemisphere" thinkers"...so, you'll understand when the thought process of your query comes out - garbled to most.
I've been married 15 years to a wonderful (most of the time) woman...Opening up new bedroom techniques and/or pleasures at this juncture neither interests or excites me...sortof "been there done that..." if you understand that?
excite you? Understand that I am single and never have been married. Maybe your 15 years of marriage gives you insight into an SO relationship that I do not have or want and cannot get a sense of.
I agree. I have been married 14 years (the vast majority of which I can honestly say has been great). My wife does everything sexually that I would ever want from a provider including Asian, French and Greek. In fact, she has told me of her fantasy regarding another woman.
I hobby for various reasons that even I cannot fully comprehend or explain. Variety? Excitement? Horniness in the middle of the day? All of these. Yes there is risk but I do not do it from a lack oif sexual energy in my relationship with my wife.
There is an old saying, "you could put all the lipstick you want on a pig, but it is still a pig."
Having been there & done that, (past tense, thanks very much!) i.e., married for a long (tooo long!)time, I have found that people just get to a point where anything new is greeting with suspicion. I used to hear from her, "Where did you learn that new trick from, your slutty girlfriend?"
After a while, it becomes a self-fufilling statement where I actually went out and found myself a "slutty girlfriend" since she was so adverse to anything different and at the very end, sex at all. And I have to say "Thanks, B*tch!" as I am now much more happier than I was before!
StillTrying - Can't speak for anyone else, but will share my thoughts/experiences. Been married for 18 years. Got married when I was young and naive. All I knew was that I liked sex and wanted it more than my significant other. As her body has changed she wants it more than she used to, which is great, but the lovemaking has not improved. For example: She thinks DATY is kind of gross, but when she has been drinking I slide down there and she enjoys it. Has never been interested in giving me a bj, but after getting her real excited can beg her for it, but this once a year treat only lasts a few seconds. Recently tried to get her fired up, licking her breasts and telling her how nice they were. Slid my dick between them and did that for awhile. Then tried to slide it into her mouth, never saw her head move so fast. So, I guess I have not been able to bring the slut out of her. Not sure what the reasons are, her prudish upbringing, my lousy lovemaking... All I know is the lack of wildness at home is one of the reasons I get so much joy from getting a great dtbbbj from a hot twenty something lady.
Would love to hear others experinces in trying to bring the wild side out of their so.
I apologize for the misunderstanding, or would you call it qualification? Anyway, you can't know until you've been there kinda thing is the gist of it.
I can empathsize with having tried and failed for any inumerable reasons...Sometimes trying to candy-coat the truth comes off as being cold-hearted. The "same ol waterin hole" just doesn't appeal to me anymore. From a strictly genetic view...We (men) are the hunter-gatherers. Meant to propagate as many females as we can. Religion pigeon-holed us into this box called matrimony.
I haven't been borne with any phobias, nervous ticks or other miladies...Just boredom!
jc, All I can say is DITTO. Everything you said applies to my situation, except I can get a BJ during foreplay for 30 seconds up to a minute. No second cups ever, not since high school days. And that is the reason I try to justify the hobby. Best of luck.
Let's see.... It's Monday afternoon, I have the day off, and I am in the mood to watch a 19 or 20 y.o. asian girl gobble my manhood while another young and pretty woman goes down on the first gal.... Or, maybe, I want to penetrate the sphincter of a delightful black woman with an ass like two unripe halves of a melon.... Or perhaps I am in the mood to get a bj from two older, but very accomplished deep throat providers...at the same time...
Yes, I am sure my wife would love to provide these services.....
Thank god, you just saved me $10k a year. MA
If your wife can really do all those things, could you rent her out for a couple hours?
Like most, my SO gets older every year. For some wonderful reason, providers don't!!!
I have to chime in here. Been married 2x and like one of the other posters the more fuel you add to my SO the sluttier she gets. I prboably get a BJ abot every 4 months from her. Which just does not cut mustard. I also enjoy reciprocating and she is not into it that much unelss again there is fuel in the tank(alcohol). The lack of oral stimulation is one of my biggest reasons for being in the hobby. Also unless I am buzzed myself my wife drunk and horny annoys the shit out of me. Should have kept the frist wife she gave the best BJ to date I have ever had(that includes from providers). It took lots of practice on her part, but you have to admire her perseverance she became really good at it. Well the story about the slut waiting to get out for me seems to include alcohol priming the pump and it just tkaes away form the advnture of it. Whoo that was long winded.
A woman has to know that she is safe to pursue her sexual desires. Either she needs to not care what you think about her or she needs to have enough faith in you to know that you won't look down on her for them.
Too many men think that only nasty girls do hardcore things. Your wife may be afraid that you think that way too.
Communication is the key.