TER General Board

Re:I am consistently surprised by how many providers are prudes, and feel thatregular_smile
Damian1 148 Reviews 2573 reads
posted

They feel guilty and want a spanking.  LOL

WhatTheHeck5165 reads

prostitution is morally wrong.  The obvious answer for these women is to leave the business.

They often seem to have been raised in a religious environment.

Cynicalman4057 reads

We all do some things that we find morally wrong and then rationalize away our guilt in doing them. Many providers also engage in sexual practices that they would not have ever previously considered but now find that it equates as a major factor in their financial/professional success.

 IAATM (do I need to spell it out?)

   Cm.

WhatTheHeck1944 reads

are too high a price to pay.  This is true for all of us, not just providers.  Yes, we all do some things that we think are morally wrong from time to time, but it is a question of degree.
We all have our own personal line - at what point have we gone over the line?

Personally, I do not think that there is anything morally wrong at all about being a provider.  Religion can teach people otherwise, but religion is wrong on this score.

Exploitation is wrong, of course, and clearly there is international trafficking going on which is morally wrong.  It is wrong to people to be trafficked to do menial labor, and it is wrong for them to be trafficked for sex.  But it is the trafficking which is wrong, not the sex.  Sex is only a hot button issue for people who have unhealthy attitudes.

Anyhow, getting back to the original point, I think it would be a very good idea for anyone involved in prostitution, whether as a provider or as a client, who thinks that it is seriously morally wrong (as many obviously do) to consider realistically the price they are paying psychologically, and leave it.

Cynicalman3659 reads

I would think ladies who have a great amount of "moral conflict" about the profession would be forced out of it by the simple fact that their distaste for what they're doing would reflect in their service, hence undermining and ultimately destroying their business.
As for Hobbyists who feel it's morally wrong;
Whydafuck would they become a hobbyist in the first place???


  Cm.

many years of hobbying.  Maybe I've been lucky.  Or maybe you've just had a bad spell?

is morally wrong for me, but I didn't grow up in a religious background. Don't know, if that even matters though. I think it just depends on the lady, being secure within her self.

I chose this as my profession and enjoy what I do.
If, they can't handle what they are doing, they need find a new profession. This business is not for the faint heart.



-- Modified on 11/14/2004 5:10:42 PM

I'm not sure growing up in a religious background is a major factor, but then, I'm not a provider.
We all have our own view of morality.
I do not look at escorting as immoral at all.
But then, I don't equate escorting with prostitution either.
I believe there is a distinct difference in the two.
The ladies I have seen have all been beautiful , sexy, intelligent women who knew exactly what they wanted out of life and were using their God given talents to get where they wanted to go in life.
Not one of them ever indicated that they were unhappy in their "job".
Most of them had a specific "plan" in mind as to how and when they were going to retire from the business.

I guess I rambled a bit.
The bottom line for me is this;
any lady involved in the hobby  who is torn by the morality issue, in my opinion, will not last long and will be very unhappy in it.
The "best" providers, like yourself, have their own minds and are not affected by the morality of others.

Just my opinion...
B

Yes, some are prudes.. Money makes people that way. We know what we do.. we know what we are called , we know what it is called. We just rather call it escorting.. In our eyes.. A prostitute is a hooker on a street corner making a  20 for  her fix.. None of us are that..


blakkromeo2g1752 reads

Hmmm...this post had me thinking. Would prostitution be morally wrong if it was legal, like it is in Nevada? Is it wrong to take a girl to dinner and a movie; and then finish the night banging her guts? We don't call that prostitution; it's a date. I think what's right about it is when it's between consenting adults and neither feels exploited. What's wrong about it is the fact that I wouldn't want my daughter doing it. This is a very dichotomous enigma for me. Now I need a drink...

I agree that there a number of ladies who have moral or other issues of a similar nature with the business, their clients, etc.  Cynicalman was pretty accurate in his first post or as one well known TER provider said to me recently  "Anybody that tells you it isn't about the money is lying".  Of course what gets the ladies into the business and what keeps them there are not necessarily the same so money may not be the only motive.  Some ladies may enjoy the adrenalin rush, others may enjoy the power, some may find they enjoy being needed and helpful, etc.


-- Modified on 11/15/2004 9:46:17 AM

-- Modified on 11/15/2004 9:49:57 AM

I think you are meeting the wrong providers.

While that may be true, openmindedness is not a requirement to be an escort. I've seen a couple that were very good at what they do, but it didn't change the fact that they felt the same way toward it as the original poster states.

It's called confliction.

I just KNOW I shouldn't have another drink.

Is abortion really murder?

Do we really need to eat meat?

Shouldn't I give more to the "needy"?

The presence of these conflicts don't by themselves make us bad people. Just beacuse an escort has a conflict in her own mind, it doesn't mean she should leave the business, unless it grows so severe that it affects her relationship with herself or her clients.  I know several providers who have this conflict...however, the business presently makes sense for them, and they don't bring their conflict into the bedroom.

However, if he saw someone who showed this enough to be labelled a "prude", that is why I would feel he might need to meet different providers.  I would think that provider is either 1) conflicted enough that it affects her performance/comfort level, 2) not enjoying her clients, or 3) holding back on services so much that it renders her overall service unenjoyable.  In all three cases, there are plenty of ladies, conflicted and unconflicted, who don't feel the same, and who you can tell that from their reviews.

My initial response was somewhat flippant, though.  I just think that providers who really love their job (and would likely be provide the best performance), whether they are conflicted in their own private thoughts or are not, will likely not bring this issue into their client's space (unless he asks for that info), and therefore, if he has seen several providers who did, he likely isn't seeing providers who are giving him the best time possible.  I mean, to me, a "prude" isn't going to ever give BBBJTCCIMNQNS, use sex toys, do anal, or role play, and, therefore, wouldn't give a "superior" provider experience.  Maybe we have different definitions of the word, though.

However, again, that is just flippant conjecture...I could be wrong.




-- Modified on 11/15/2004 1:06:51 PM

i do not know any providers who feel that way.
On the other hand, I am continually astonished by how many hobbyists continue to hobby, in spite of the heavy weight of guilt it brings them.
I for one have reconciled my feeling of legal vs. moral right. While i am on the fringe of one and willing to accept any consequences that arise for that, my soul bears no burden about what i do.

In spite of the fact that i feel that exploring our sexuality is as much a part of us as eating and breathing, we make promises and vows which bring with them duties.
I feel it is neither my right nor my responsibility to attempt to "lighten that burden” of guilt so many feel. Being true to our promises is deeply rooted in our cultural beliefs and it is not for me to tell you where you duty lays. Only the individual can reconcile beliefs /vs./ actions.

Love and light
roxy  





-- Modified on 11/15/2004 1:35:27 PM

Primordial2884 reads

Maybe in your experiences religion is a factor but what appears to be overlooked is the situation of some that have basically gotten "stuck" in the profession. The income is substancial when compared to other lines of work including upper management that are available to women, they are very under paid in comparison to mens income which is definitely wrong. There are of course many variables to the original statement and this is only one of them. It is never correct to assume the reasons for anyones actions as no one knows the reasons except that individual so anything that is voiced by anyone other than them is simply speculation.
Be At Peace.

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