Have you ever seen a provider that you thought was so sweet, and so perfect, that you wanted to ask her to be your girlfriend? Maybe you've seen her over 5x or ever 10x, she knows your name, she knows what really gets you off, and you think she would actually be a great girlfriend.
I've seen a number of ladies, and awkwardly asked if I could take them out sometime...I got the real name and number for a couple of them, but it never worked out. I didn't follow up, and when I got time to think about it, I would feel weird. I did try to follow up with one of them, but just got her voice mail, and no return call. Does this ever work out? Would you be able to date someone who was once an escortCome to think of is, most of my GFs over the last several years have either been hookers or ex hookers.
but be VERY VERY careful, both in broaching the subject and your expectations if she does say yes. Can you handle your GF fucking other guys, or if you can't, are you prepared to make up for her loss of income? That is just one of about a thousand questions you need to ask yourself before going down this road. BTW not getting a return call is an answer, unfortunately for you, the answer was NO. Don't confuse GFE with GF, it can make most men go completely fucking nuts and prompts a thousand "I have fallen for a hooker and can't get up" threads.As my hooker dating friend points out well, you better be able to put up with your gal fking other dudes. That isn't a bridge too far, its a universe too far, for me anyway.
I know this is a cliché, but its true for me...I don't pay them to stay, I pay them so they leave. Would I date them if I knew fact certain they left the biz, sure, no issues there. But many a john has found out the hard way that the green eyed monster can be deadly to a p4p turned civie relationship. Many girls have said here over the years that civie dating is very complicated and many have said they wont do it, until they leave the biz. Its simple for me. Relationships can be complex enough without having to add that very difficult extra burden of where she goes to work and what she does while there.That makes the "I've fallen" threads even more entertaining.
Nothing like reading/listening to a guy fall into the abyss. I prefer my GFs an hour or two at a time. I hate walking her dogs, or putting the toilet seat down, or heaven forbid have to go to family functions that I have no interest in. So much easier to just go...do my thing..leave...and start again with my next GF. I think most of the gals feel similarlybut be VERY VERY careful, both in broaching the subject and your expectations if she does say yes.
Can you handle your GF fucking other guys, or if you can't, are you prepared to make up for her loss of income? That is just one of about a thousand questions you need to ask yourself before going down this road.
BTW not getting a return call is an answer, unfortunately for you, the answer was NO. Don't confuse GFE with GF, it can make most men go completely fucking nuts and prompts a thousand "I have fallen for a hooker and can't get up" threads.
Yes, as a hobbyist I have no problem with a providers line of work, it's a job. If I were to ever date a provider I would only ask one thing, that she not do business in the City or area we live in.
lol work place romance happens in every industry.
There is no doubt that a provider would make a terrific connection The qualities that make her desirable as a providerwould, of course transfer
I do see other problems beyond knowing her profession. That, obviouly is something that you would have to come to terms with..But other things. You want to have sex but she, in spite of the personal connection with you, has had sex that day , maybe more than once, and maybe with someone better looking and more skilled than you
You pick her up flowers or a small gift to show your affection. But she has had several gifts given to her and several different flowers that week.
You plan a fancy dinner and night out. But she has had several guys take her to fancy restaurants that month.
This is not to imply that a personal relationship is not possible or desired It certainly would be, but the normal complications in a relationship would be multiplied by ten.
Providers are wonderful and I have dated several, one seriously, but it is complicated. Through no ones fault. You just can't apply normal standards and reactions to what is, by definition, an extraordinary profession. With, greatfully, extraordinary personalities
I've seen a number of ladies, and awkwardly asked if I could take them out sometime...I got the real name and number for a couple of them, but it never worked out. I didn't follow up, and when I got time to think about it, I would feel weird. I did try to follow up with one of them, but just got her voice mail, and no return call.
Does this ever work out? Would you be able to date someone who was once an escort?
I thought that was called the Girlfriend Experience...something so real that you wish you met her under different circumstances?
There have been some unhappy tales on these boards regarding that however, so do be cautious
Agree with Alyson. I have been married for 12 years, during 10 of which I planned my divorce. Marriage is so horrible, it makes me think of every other provider I meet whether she could be a GF material. BUT, you know what they say about grass not always greener on the other side. Wait a second, I don't even have it green on this side!
Consider SD/SB arrangement?
The most obvious block to this would be if you're married. If you are, don't be surprised when women get insulted. If you get the best bits of someone and can't really give that back in return, then you should be giving a white envelope.
with the cautionary notes already addressed, I'll answer the part below with "why wouldn't I? She'd be dating someone who paid for sex." Fictionally speaking, of course.
[edited for typo]And it is running wild. Stop reading all those fantasy novels.
All the thing you mention does happen but only rarely..Is to avoid the complications of a girlfriend
I have not been able to pull it off (what others call it MAN UP). I have 2 children that I care about more than anything. We shielded them from our marital issues. However, I am looking forward to the day they turn 18.
Kids are a hell of a lot smarter than you give them credit for. Do yourself a favor, don't live in misery for another decade only to find out your kids knew everything the whole time and all your "sacrifices" were for nothing.
No child wants to be the cause of their parents being miserable, so MAN UP if you are really so miserable, it's the right thing to do for ALL your sakes.My two kids are indeed aware of conflict. Even on one occasion, we informed them we were separating. One handled it well, the other did not. Shortly after, we entered into marriage counseling which kept the ship afloat and backed off from separation.
What I meant by saying "shielded" is that no verbal altercation, debate, or arguments occur in their presence. We keep it calm and cool. She is on three different psychoactive prescription pills. I admit that I take one - Effexor. Call us medicated; but hey, pill kept my sanity trying to handle an unmotivated wife.No child wants to be the cause of their parents being miserable, so MAN UP if you are really so miserable, it's the right thing to do for ALL your sakes.
Going through life doped up to cope with a lousy marriage might be enough for you, but I know I am not going to get anywhere near enough years on this earth to throw away ten or twenty of them being miserable. but that's just me of course, You are a grown ass man that didn't come here to listed to a lecture by the likes of me. I hope it all works out for you.
I can sort of understand the ball nipping that goes on and the thoughts that can pester you and put a damper on your gestures.
In the guy's case, it could be the financial competition, (other guys with money and good jobs in his mind,) and the physical competition (him being the champion in the sack,) was what seemed to be the trouble. (And knowing another dick was there.) For me, the female, it would be more the competition in looks/body/dress, normal lifestyle vs alternative lifestyle, and independence/prestige of another woman... And possible emotional connections to other women. Though agreed upon, it can be difficult for some types of people to deal with that. But you have to experience it to know how that feels, and if you can or want to handle it.but the best advice I can give to a guy with those insecurities is just remember "She is with you because she wants to be" Some other guy can give her more money, he might have a bigger dick. be more handsome or have a thousand other qualities that might make you feel inadequate, the difference is when you take her out, it's YOU doing it, the guy she actually WANTS to be with. If that's not enough for a guy, he shouldn't be dating hookers. His insecurities will ultimately drive her away
So why do you think I ended up here? Life is definitely a lot more exciting and much less miserable now that I have been in the hobby for 3 years.
-- Modified on 7/30/2015 8:41:32 PM
Great post, Alyson. As usual, you are spot on. Am in a relationship with a former provider right now. We've been seeing one another for about 6 months now. Legally separated from my wife last October. Saw her twice before my separation, and twice after. She's the only provider I ever had an overnight session with. Our last real "session" was around the end of January. I had scheduled a 3 hr. appointment with her, at the end of which she asked me to spend the night with her. The subject of dating came up, and we decided to give it a go. And it's been lovely. There have been some challenges, but we continue to work through them, and I can honestly say we love each other very much. Our interests are different enough from one another that we can introduce new things to each other, but not so different that we can't relate. So that's been good. And our sex life is even better than when we were provider/client. Have to say I am completely happy with the way things are going between us, and it was totally worth the risk! ~~~~Robert
And is always ready to go...no batteries required.
My resume doesn't exist....a man of my incredible wealth doesn't need anything more of an introduction than.... BOB.SUGAR.....or just for short BSMy grandfather bought my grandma from her father (tmi i noe) and they did pretty okay (70 years married!!!!)
One of my reasons for hobbying is to avoid civvie relationships. I think it really takes a lot of masochism to stay in a long term civvie relationship. One of the only reasons i see of being in a long term civvie relationship are the children. I have had plenty of civvie relationships and the longest lasted four months, mostly since im someone that almost never compromises. Call me old fashioned but when the time comes to settle down i'm going for traditional women with a big, warm family. There is just too much i dont know about an escort to just ask her out. I'd rather she help me with my pent up sexuality and I help her by giving her dough and just leave it at that, why ruin such a perfect symbiotic relationship? Being old fashioned i dont really enjoy the prolonged company of a girl that is too independant, ruins the childrens perception of roles of mother and father and this impacts generation after generation. In previous posts i said i would love to date an escort after some thought i now have changed my mind.You have given some great advise on this thread!
Bob Sugar
Biggest, baddest, doesn't think he needs this resume.
Yes. Wealth in Asia back then wasnt distributed right, well it still isn't. It became such that you can just go up to a farmer and offer to buy her daughter. The farmer would have some money in his pockets and wouldn't need to feed one extra mouth