Would you see a provider with your husband that he had previously cheated on you with? The provider is ok with it, the husband not so much.....the wife is working twards it as it was her idea because the lady is pretty inexpensive........is this a good idea or a train wreck waiting to happen???  Thoughts????

...everyone being good with it. Especially when it's a couple bringing a third person in. If he's not good with it then it very likely won't go well. Now apparently you're ok with it but turn the situation around. How would you feel about it then?

who cheated on who?  who's being asked?  why would the husband suggest it if he's not into it?  why would the wife see a girl her husband.... what the what?

No chance. The husband is not on board but the wife is working towards it as the girl is pretty inexpensive? I'm second to none on loving a bargain, but frugality alone is not what drives people to see providers.  There's some other reason for the wife.

Yes, all has been forgiven, deff not trying to rub his nose in it as it has been several years since this happened, hes ok with it but afraid i will freak out.....i dont blame her for anything, nor do i dislike her, he is afraid i will freak out and it will break what we have fixed, i feel we are both strong enough to make it work.......its of course not a done deal, i was just curious if anything like this could work.  

Lol, hubbs cheated on me with a provider, all is good now, i actually suggested seeing her as she is inexpensive and decent looking, hes ok with it just worried i will have a freak out, i do not blame her or dislike her, and im not trying to get back at him.......he found her attractive and her reviews claim she is fantastic with couples so i thought why not.

True, in a way it woul be a form of closure,  its not malicious in amy way, i have had conversations with the provider and we get along fine, hes more worried that it will hurt me in the long run, im actually ok with everything, and if you knew my husband, being frugal is HUGE for him, that was the main reason he saw her to behin with, shes not local to us so im not worried about that, i am just curious if something like this would or could work.

and the motivation(s) seem pretty unclear. If someone has a hidden agenda and another is uncomfortable... I see nothing but a train wreck in that future.

It would be hard for the husband to enjoy this because he is going to feel like there are psychological land mines everywhere. Even if your intentions are good, pushing this could feel (to him) like an oblique form of sadism from you.

but it might take "grudge fucking" to a whole new level.

Your question was directed toward the ladies, and none have chimed in.  i'm wondering if there is a reason for that  so I'll throw my opinion out there.  It sounds like you and hubby have talked it out pretty well, and it also sounds like you communicate pretty well.  I'd say go for it, unless he really doesn't like it.  If your relationship is solid, the worst outcome is you've each learned something. And it may open up a whole new form of fun for you.  I have been known to make poor decisions, just to see what will happen, so grain of salt and all that

Lol, i knew yoy would tell it like it is, thanks for the input.   Of course there sre scars but i have healed well.   I seem to be getting a lot of WTF are you crazy type of feedback, which is cool, i expected as much.

Very true, thanks.....and your right ,it could go south very quickly, but im definitely not trying to push the issue it was just a thought i brought up to him a wjile ago, so i thought i would bring the question here since everyone here usually has pretty strong opinions.

No hidden agenda, me and the lady actually get along grest and have man things in common,  shes within our budget and cute, and loves women, which has been hard for us to find in our area, and we will be in her area soon so it was just a thought.

Are that the guys who just answered ur question are women at heart lol, or they can't read a fucking tittle "for the ladies

Thanks for the input,  we are in a great place and i am very secure in our relationship, i think we could handle it.

I figured that since I went through this, I'd give it a whack.

Sorry, I should have picked up on the feminine tone to your alias...  

You're right. There are a number of gender neutral aliases here, but a math reference is clearly an attempt at butching up.:-P  

We havw already seen several lovely ladies, so thats not an issue, and i am in this for th long haul, we have been together well over 20 years, so were not going anywhere,  i habe had a troubled relationship with sex, but have since recieved the needed help for that and we are on a great path, i love the time we spend with others as well,  and we only hobby together now so im not worried anout either of us straying. It was just an interesting thought.

Thank you for the input, i enjoy spending time with other women so thats not a problem,  and we do have a very open line of communication, his concern is me being hurt again,  but i think im strong enough to handle it.  Its still just in the thought stages.

They're issued after you pass the oral exam

I wouldn't session with you two, and I love couples.

Thanks for the feedback, we follow each other on social media and habe spoken via text and email, its a long story, but to make it short, we contacted her and asked if she would be wlling to see us th next time she came thru town, she said she would as long as i was ok with it, an we started corresponding her and there, i am not out to trap anyone, or hurt anyone, yes hat he did hurt ME but i have forgiven his one mistake and moved past things, the fact that me and her get along kinda freaks him out, he just doesn't want it to bring back old bad memories, hes fine if i am, but seeing all of th feedback i am going to take your advice and not go throug with it, and just leave i as a what if thought.