There seems to be many opinions on screening..
The good:
Client has no issues providing his full contact info that a site like Date Check uses for verification which is pretty standard screening info across the industry..
The bad:
Client does not understand the 'WHY' screen and 'WHY' this info is required.. Seeing a provider who does not screen you opens you up to a date with LE or worse, a set-up.. She most likely sees anyone at any cost.. Freedom is a big one to give up..
The ugly:
Client gets all nasty and defensive about his info.. He has something to hide..
The low-low on info:
Across the net at provider help sites all suggest the following for screening:
full name, residential address, city/zipcode, DOB, phone number, employer, position, work number, email address, contact number, contact preference - contact time
Just as verification sites and/or agencies do..
Providers may even have on contact forms other info that may be desired.. height. weight, race, when you would like a date, references, review board nicknames..
If you are serious about seeing a certain provider then providing screening info should not be an issues as it fosters trust at the very beginning and enhances the whole experience for us both..
You forgot to ask for a social security number.
There is certain info, that I will not give out. I will not give my home address, and home phone # to ANY provider. If I can't get passed screening based on other methods, then so be it.
I will be more comfortable giving out certain information to very well known and established providers, but for a newbie provider, it will not happen.
Am I hiding something? You bet! My family and their right to privacy.
"If you are serious about seeing a certain provider then providing screening info should not be an issues as it fosters trust at the very beginning and enhances the whole experience for us both.."
As a provider, I used to be from the school of "You don't want to be screened through extensive personal information? Fuck you. *dial tone*"
Then something very traumatic happened to me, & my entire family's way of life was threatened.
There are unbalanced people in this business on both sides. We are all at risk-clients included.
I went out to dinner with a provider the other night and she was carrying around a notebook. I asked what was in it and she said "oh all of my clients and their information." At the end of the evening, she left the notebook on the table in the restaurant and walked out-we had to go back to retrieve it.
In a world where plenty of providers keep Excel & Google databases for months to years upon end-despite the fact that a client has been verified and proven himself a relaible client, if I were a man I would be entirely hesitant to provide private information. I would establish a hobby name, provide references, white list referrals, a Date-Check ID or any plausible, non-invasive means of being verified and if the provider couldn't become comfortable or meet me half way, I would seek the next.
Don't get me wrong-I have been "had" twice in this business, and I sincerely wished that I had kept the guys information until after the appointment-something that I have now employed, destroying the verification material upon the completion of a successful session. BUT, thats the nature of the game-its not rainbows and leprechauns and pots of gold all the time.
Even though we know there are inherrent dangers and that we must employ the necessary methods to have a recourse should something negative transpire I think that its very important that we providers remain empathetic & dedicated to the protection and discretion of our clients by developing several screening methods that allow our guests to remain relatively anonymous should they require it. I'm sure as hell not giving him my full name, showing him my ID or providing him with my home address "just in case"-its important to level the playing field a little bit though through obvious effort and care for his feelings and hesitation. I've found that playing hardball over screening does nothing but drive my blood pressure up and agitate them into a frenzy. Two adults can come to agreeable terms if their intentions are on par with each other.
So I would modify your thought with one of my own: if a provider is serious about establishing a worthwhile clientele, meeting a gentleman halfway with common sense and empathy shouldn't be a "hassle to her" as it fosters his trust in her professionalism and discretion.
Good luck & stay cool.
-- Modified on 1/20/2008 7:52:32 AM
No doubt I can agree with you.. IF someone comes to you with a reference and/or verification site info then the rest is not needed as this is suitable for verification purposes..
Yet I have seen very few people who are DC members..
Seen quite a few "review writers" from here.. That to simplifies the process but is not a guarantee as there are hundreds of fake reviews here..
I do meet half way.. But I will not stack the deck against me as the odds have changed..
After verification that data should be canned only keeping name, safe email, safe phone and maybe notes about what you like and last date seen.. That is what I do.. Once we get to 'know' each other it is sort of mute to have that info.. It's not mine and I don't want the hassles of keeping it even though it resides on a 1024 bit encrypted mysql database right here at my place..
There are a$$wipes in the world for bad reasons..
For me, a review history verified through WhiteList reverse search is an acceptable step; though typically if it can't be followed up through contact with a reputable provider who is listed on that body of reviews then the process isn't complete.
Personally, the "DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM!?" reviewers do nothing for me anyway at this point LOL!
Good post & good luck!
-- Modified on 1/20/2008 8:01:32 AM
Well said
Your perspective is in the middle. Perfect.
This why I mentioned other methods.
There is also a big difference between giving information out to an unknown provider, versus a well known provider, such as yourself, Ally.
The comfort level must be on both sides, or as you say, a level playing field.
1) Where and how long do you store web forms?
2) Why do you need my home address. Anyone with a little understanding knows that with name, home address on can get any other information. Heard about Intellichoice?
3) Please don't tell me you delete the information. Unless you reformat your disk five times or more, you can get the information out and that is what LE do. It is called forensics.
4) If you do use a Web hosting service, they back up every 24 hours and are legally bound to provide the information to law enforcement upon demand. This includes your email.
This is what I will provide;
I will give my Cell # and name.
I will give you provider reference, reputable of course. Nothing more nothing less.
If that is good enough, will go somewhere else and see someone else.
Never have filled Web Form and never will.
Too many ways to track emails unless you use a proxy email service.
I'm glad you understand the sensitive nature of our private information and have found other ways to screen. And I'm glad you posted about the other provider who accidentally left her black book with client information in the restaurant. Any provider keeping our contact information in a non-secure form is risking outting her clients and is doing a huge disservice to those gentlemen she sees. She's also doing herself a huge disservice should that book ever get into the hands of LE. There are much more secure ways to keep client info and it's not on a cell phone or on a computer hard drive or flash drive or any other form of easily compromised electronic media. There are secure email sites where this information can be safely stored for future reference. Thank you so much for understanding the risk to your clients as well as to yourself. I wish all providers had your understanding of the screening risks to the client instead of being caught up totally in their own interests and convenience. Bless you!
-- Modified on 1/20/2008 10:09:32 AM
If a provider will give me the same information I give her, then I might consider giving her my personal information. By that I mean her real name, home address, phone, etc. But they don't. I mean, wait a minute: The clients are clients. They are paying for a service. There is real risk from the client's viewpoint, just as there is for the provider. It's the provider who should be taking the extra risk, not the client. What ever happened to the customer being always right? As has been stated on this board so many times, providers are not doing clients a favor; it is a business transaction.
i think the point is, you have to have a reliable trust mechanism.
being a provider is like riding a dirt bike. if you know your limits and the terrain is well lit, it can be a blast. if you are just twisting octane on a dark road, you are asking for it.
if a provider wants a reference, i have plenty of phone numbers to give her, and i let the girls work it out.
if a provider wants replicable info, like a work phone number, then i have to pass. not because i'm devious, but because i'm retired. and married.
the simplest trust mechanisms are the best: he's cool, he's not supercool, and he's public (hotel room, house number, or your massage parlor where other girls are working). there's nothing squirrelly about his phone and he uses the same phone for all contact. whatever.
a private situation with a complete stranger is the worst situation to be in, no matter who you are or what you're doing. look at how people behave in a hotel elevator.
your last paragraph got it exactly right. you stay cool too ... and safe rather than lucky.
Nichole,
Screening is not going to help you AT ALL. You see, when LE set ups operations to catch drug dealers, child molester, or anybody else, they will create fake records of themselves because they know that they will or could be checked out. They will create fake IDs, criminal history, school they attended, place or work, etc., etc., etc. So, if they are going to catch you -they will. You are really wasting your time and money on screening, and at the same time potential clients will not see you -like myself. I realize you want to make sure the person is not LE, but there are other ways of doing that without invading people's privacy, because as I've said if LE has place the eye on you, they will get you. Anyway, good luck.
Thank you all..
Yes "one side" I did not have the 'whole' Picture now I have more complete info and am tailoring my methods to better fit..
That is why I posted this message in the first place.. This is what I have read about and been told about.. FROM one side..
Needed some feedback and got what I was looking for..
Another board had the pleasure of critiquing my site.. I am changing it accordingly..
Review and feedback are a very good thing.. Thanks for your wonderful feedback..
Now if you guys that have seen we would just write a review...
Oh well, we know don't we.. 
Been some real help here..
Nichole
-- Modified on 1/21/2008 3:30:26 AM
I am an escort newbie and I am still very confused on the right ways to screen a potentiol client
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