I'm posting this anonymously to get objective feedback from ladies and gents alike.   Let me just preface this by saying that I LOVE my job and would not do it if I didn't love it.  I chose to do this as a profession and made a conscious, well-informed decision to do so.  I obviously enjoy sex as I'm in my sexual prime but I THOROUGHLY enjoy the diverse, fascinating, and cool men and women I've had the pleasure of meeting thus far.  

he admitted to being in a SB/SD type relationship with a woman at his job. Yikes! I advised him of the possible problems but overall he took it well.

Wow! What a great post..  

Not at all that there is anything wrong with what you did.
Sounds like it totally worked out.

Hope you feel better now.

In and out of the hobby. But not caring about the worlds opinion doesn't make you so. It is  good to be honest too. No one likes having an ax over their heads waiting to fall. Once I tried to keep my wife and my hobbying a secret, but we got outed. Well I did at any rate and my wife outed herself in my defense. It was the best thing that happened to us. It is so freeing not to have to hide even if I lost friends over it. I do feel liberated.

I have a large family whom I'm close to.  They all know that from time to time a visit certain "lady-friends", and that's about it.  We all remain very discreet and tacit about our thoughts and feelings on the subject, but it's been that way for years now and it seems to work fine

Although, taking that step takes a lot of courage! Congratulations on your new found freedom.

-- Modified on 11/27/2015 10:01:46 AM

Please I would greatly appreciate it, if posted anonymously as well. I just want congratulate her/him and just to let her/him know that I would feel the same, for being free......
I am replying to your vent/share...........Feedback  to congratulate you. I am so happy for you. I Love what  I do as well.... I truly wish I could feel  the same as you are. As for me feeling free, no guilt trips is priceless. Is just too bad that we are living in the hypocritical society. Once again, Congratulations.  
Happy Holidays!.!.

Your mom sounds like mine never misses a beat. When I opened up to my parents about this they were not happy but understood where I was coming from. We always had the relationship were we wouldn't lie to each other and give it to each other straight. As the child I always gave them the respect of listening to their opinion to what I shared with them. Circumstances of my life have led me here but I don't see me doing this the rest of my life. I enjoy the sex and meeting some amazing people.

Posted By: need2vent

I'm posting this anonymously to get objective feedback from ladies and gents alike.   Let me just preface this by saying that I LOVE my job and would not do it if I didn't love it.  I chose to do this as a profession and made a conscious, well-informed decision to do so.  I obviously enjoy sex as I'm in my sexual prime but I THOROUGHLY enjoy the diverse, fascinating, and cool men and women I've had the pleasure of meeting thus far.  
   
  My mom lives in the same city I do and doesn't miss a beat.  She had noticed the improvement of my physical appearance and the sudden change in my financial situation and made plenty of comments and asked a million questions.  I really never intended to divulge my profession to her but I decided I had to be truthful with her about how I was able to afford the car I was going to pick her up in to take her to surgery.  The week before her surgery I "came out" to her at dinner.  She claimed that she knew all along and almost had a break down in the restaurant.  She knew that I was going to be steadfast about my chosen profession and that no amount of guilt-tripping or the emotional blackmail tactics that used to be effective were going to work this time. Since the outing our relationship has shockingly IMPROVED because I have nothing to hide!  Even though she thinks it's a part of a manic episode I'm having (NO she's not a Psychiatrist) and that I'll snap out of it, I feel FREE!!  Am I fucked up?  I have become divorced from societies' opinion of me and that includes my parents.  I lead an unconventional lifestyle and I'm totally HAPPY!  Are there any other providers or hobbyists who have chosen to "out" themselves to loved ones and feel liberated?  Please share!!

One of my main axioms is never to divulge this hobby to anyone. I try to be very careful with what I do so as not to have to explain any certain situations. I wouldn’t even tell my best friend if he shared that he’d like to do this, and wondered if I knew anything about it. The other thing I’ve gotten over is the guilt, whether it be from society, religion, or familial. It’s just a decision I made without telling anyone. I don’t have to have a big pronouncement to feel free. It’s from within. Another reason for not telling anyone is something I alluded to in recent post. It’s the secrecy and taboo of it all that’s alluring. I wouldn’t want to lose that allure with a coming out.  

When a boyfriend of mine found out- (as they always seem to do) he was shocked!!  
 The same man who sleeping with other woman the whole time; had a rude awakening..  
However he then became curious about the industry; wanted to know about my encounters, book another girl with me, etc. etc. and then wanted to start an agency with me!!  wtf.

Of course so does everyone else and I can't think of a single negative effect it's had on my life

Collectively we are a bunch of cowards, sneaking around afraid to tell the world that either we pay for sex or get paid for sex as if it's something that we should be ashamed of.  

Guys I Golf and Snow ski with know.  Some of them are hobbyists as well.  We have had a few casual conversations, but really have not compared notes.

Posted By: need2vent

I'm posting this anonymously to get objective feedback from ladies and gents alike.   Let me just preface this by saying that I LOVE my job and would not do it if I didn't love it.  I chose to do this as a profession and made a conscious, well-informed decision to do so.  I obviously enjoy sex as I'm in my sexual prime but I THOROUGHLY enjoy the diverse, My, and cool men and women I've had the pleasure of meeting thus far.  
   
  My mom lives in the same city I do and doesn't miss a beat.  She had noticed the improvement of my physical appearance and the sudden change in my financial situation and made plenty of comments and asked a million questions.  I really never intended to divulge my profession to her but I decided I had to be truthful with her about how I was able to afford the car I was going to pick her up in to take her to surgery.  The week before her surgery I "came out" to her at dinner.  She claimed that she knew all along and almost had a break down in the restaurant.  She knew that I was going to be steadfast about my chosen profession and that no amount of guilt-tripping or the emotional blackmail tactics that used to be effective were going to work this time. Since the outing our relationship has shockingly IMPROVED because I have nothing to hide!  Even though she thinks it's a part of a manic episode I'm having (NO she's not a Psychiatrist) and that I'll snap out of it, I feel FREE!!  Am I fucked up?  I have become divorced from societies' opinion of me and that includes my parents.  I lead an unconventional lifestyle and I'm totally HAPPY!  Are there any other providers or hobbyists who have chosen to "out" themselves to loved ones and feel liberated?  Please share!!

My parents are both gone, but I have told my sisters...it just came up in conversation once about my health issues and surgery and it's really just part of the story...and I have never been ashamed it embarrassed about my life choices...

My psychiatrist would have fun with this..

Posted By: need2vent

I'm posting this anonymously to get objective feedback from ladies and gents alike.   Let me just preface this by saying that I LOVE my job and would not do it if I didn't love it.  I chose to do this as a profession and made a conscious, well-informed decision to do so.  I obviously enjoy sex as I'm in my sexual prime but I THOROUGHLY enjoy the diverse, fascinating, and cool men and women I've had the pleasure of meeting thus far.  
   
  My mom lives in the same city I do and doesn't miss a beat.  She had noticed the improvement of my physical appearance and the sudden change in my financial situation and made plenty of comments and asked a million questions.  I really never intended to divulge my profession to her but I decided I had to be truthful with her about how I was able to afford the car I was going to pick her up in to take her to surgery.  The week before her surgery I "came out" to her at dinner.  She claimed that she knew all along and almost had a break down in the restaurant.  She knew that I was going to be steadfast about my chosen profession and that no amount of guilt-tripping or the emotional blackmail tactics that used to be effective were going to work this time. Since the outing our relationship has shockingly IMPROVED because I have nothing to hide!  Even though she thinks it's a part of a manic episode I'm having (NO she's not a Psychiatrist) and that I'll snap out of it, I feel FREE!!  Am I fucked up?  I have become divorced from societies' opinion of me and that includes my parents.  I lead an unconventional lifestyle and I'm totally HAPPY!  Are there any other providers or hobbyists who have chosen to "out" themselves to loved ones and feel liberated?  Please share!!

Even if I did out myself none of my friends would care since we have better things to worry about like where we are eating out this week or what movie to watch next month. But its my private life, no one needs to know! For this reason I've never felt the need to expose this part of me. Its not a big deal! I don't need the attention nor want it and I am good at keeping secrets.  

Good for you...I have a few friends who know and already got rejected by one long time friend.i dont live in the same city as most all of my family so there's no reason to come out with that information for me nor would I but I'm sure it feels good regardless

My story is very different than yours. My family just used that information to humiliate me, and I still felt regret for having told me.

My mom won't tell ANYONE the truth about what I do even if they ask her directly. She has always been an expert at putting on façades so this situation will be no different!

Thank you girl!  I appreciate you sharing your experience and the need for a support system in our industry!

Absolutely!  Thank you GaGambler!!

Awesome!  Thank you my friend!

Thank you my friend!!

You know I understand the urge to be in a "normal" relationship but I ask myself if I could just turn off my desire for uninhibited sex with multiple partners.  I won't try and answer that question today but I do think about it from time to time.

From the provider side...the longer you do this, the more difficult it becomes to conceal. It's probably different for a hobbyist, especially one who dabbles every few weeks or so. For someone like that, I can't think of any good reason to disclose this activity to anybody...it just invites judgment and misinterpretation (Aren't they all trafficked or pimped? What if you get aids?).

During the chit chat, one of my hostesses told me how her mother found out about what she was really doing. She accidentally found out when [no need for boring details]. I gathered that it was difficult at first, but her mother realizes that she won't be changing her daughter at this stage of things and just encourages her to be safe and stay safe and, it seems, is there for her if needed.

Thank you girlfriend!! Happy holidays to you too!

You're priceless!  I love it!

ACCEPTANCE is the answer to ALL my problems today!! I'm used to the generic, ignorant questions and comments I get about not only my profession but my ethnicity, my appearance, my height, it's standard fare isn't it!?  LOL.  Thanks for sharing your experience!

Good point thank you!

I am sure you know the look of abject horror many women put on the moment a guy (or a woman) tells them they have either paid for sex or been paid for sex. Sometimes after the initial shock wears off, it's replaced by curiosity, but in many cases people just can't accept the fact that P4P is essentially harmless and not morally deplorable.

I thought you mainly dated hookers as a status symbol. Not that there is anything wrong with dating hookers//providers, the only perk to doing so IMO would be the financial one.  

I've had at least 5 personas...with multiple agency working names, 2 pre-stalking independent personas, post-stalking (current) persona, even a short-lived stint at a dungeon...

was my ex.  She married me solely to solve her money problems & after she bankrupted me, threw me over like the trash.  I did not hobby until many years later...  or cheat...  or look at other women.  I'd have been so much better off if I'd hobbied instead.

and yes, a lot of hookers are much less needy and clingy from both a financial and emotional POV than most other "types" of women.

"There is another perk to dating hookers and that is unlike other women where you have to date a while before every finding out if you are sexually compatible, with a hooker you already know if you are good in bed together. "

Funny. The last provider I saw told me that my dog knew what we were doing behind closed doors. I just can't figure out why she (my dog) pulls condoms out of the trash and leaves them around the house. Little Bitch!

I like learning what a woman likes, and seeing if she is into things she may not have done before. For me that is part of the fun of dating a new person.

Mainly because I don't know what she likes, many are fairly reserved sexually at least upon your first time being with them. I'm probably not talking about seasoned vets here, just the majority of my experiences.

and I agree that with a few exceptions the more experience people have here, the less judgmental they "tend" to be.  

I still don't want to sleep with a blackman.

You are forever posting one line subjects without putting an "eom." Now you post an "eom" that has a message in it!

but quite possibly your best post yet. lol

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years.

They are the two important relatives who matter to me. At my age 83, many of my close friends and relatives are dead. Now my best friends are providers or  friends who live far away. So who cares that I pay for sex. Without my lady friends I would probably not still be alive. My wife of 53 years was the love of my life and I never strayed. It took me about 4 years to finally seek feminine intimacy. I've never regretted it

She sounds like a Good Wife And who cares about the friends they come and go as the seasons..  

You're fuckin hilarious girl!!  I can TOTALLY relate about dating a "civvie"!!!! I would prefer to date clients honestly...we'll have to wait and see!!

AWESOME!! I LOVE it!!!

Sounds like my ex, too.

at peace with yourself, enjoying your chosen profession, and not fucked up.

M biggest complaint about the term whore monger, is that on TER the word comes with the stigma of immaturity, and perhaps a bit of insecurity. On the GD board obnoxiousness seems to be the dominate personality trait, which might bee fine in the girls locker. My tolerance level for an obnoxious female is rather low.  

Not that I dislike American women, or that foreign women can't be obnoxious. I think that foreign women, providers included conduct themselves with much more respect than domestic women.