TER General Board

Providers: please help
jz22 4744 reads
posted

I'm an older guy (62) who finally got up the courage to try this hobby but when it came to the crucial point, my erection weakened and I couldn't complete. This hasn't happened to me since I was 19 and I'm assuming (hoping) it was just nerves.

The provider was super about it all and only gave up trying when I did. I don't understand all of what happened because she was gorgeous and really turned me on until it came to the real thing.

Here's my queston?  What is it like for provider when this happens (assuming I'm not the first)? And would you see the guy a second time?

Of course, guys who who have some insight are welcome to comment but I'm really wondering about the proivder point of view. It couldn't have been much fun for her, though I did give her a $100 tip for the extra effort.

I'm not a provider, but I am 60.  There are several things which need to be considered;  First, when was your last 'O'?  Second, what is your relationship status?  Is there any guilt going on here?  It is my analysis that if you think about these items you may be able to understand this process.  Take Care

i am a provider and yes things do happen and we have no control over. it has alot to do with what is going on in your life and meds that are being taken. things just don't happen because you want then to. i would never make anyone feel bad about a thing like that. yes i would see the guy again. and again. it is not your fault or hers. do not stop because of a thing like that get with a girl that understands. (makes me think, i told my dad the other day his zipper was down he said honey what won't come up won't come out. it was funny the way he said it.) don't let it get you down. it is life...sassy

interested in reading. I don't remember the subject title, but is probably on page three by now. The responses, as I recall, were very good.

Not to worry. And yes, we ladies are experienced with this, and of course, we'd see you again..
and again..

You say that you are 62..... well I'm 76 and I tell my urologist everything. He checked my prostate and my testosterone levels and found that everything was essentially normal. My problem was getting a good enough erection to perform. I now inject a solution of papaverine HCl and phentolamine..... just 0.6 to 0.7 ml into my penis about 5-10 minutes before action. The erection will last about 30-60 minutes.
I explain to my provider what I need to do and why. She usually cringes and can't watch. I tell her that she can watch me if she would like .
After I get about 4-5 big "O"s out of her I'll let her start on me !! My goal is to suck and lick her clit and labia until I get tired.... about 20min. and she has had enough.
Warning !! do not buy those so-called medications that you get with SPAM.
Get yourself to a good board-certified urologist who specializes in erectile dysfunction. I'm hoping to keep going til I'm ninety or until I drop dead.
REMEMBER... the urge starts in the brain!!!

Ginger girl2895 reads

Let me start by saying that, I think it was very nice of youto tip your provider. When this happens and it often does with new guys of all ages, I for one do as much as I can to help which sometimes does require alot of work. I never of course expect a tipfor somthing like that and consider it my duty to help my client to relax and to experience as much enjoyment out of the appointment as possible. Getting a tip for that is not at all necessary and your a sweet gentlemen for doing so.

If you are feeling nervous before an appointment and want a glass of wine or cocktail to take the edge off please stop at one or two max. Take into consideration any meds you may take that can have an affect as well.

I have found that starting the session off with a relaxing massage can really help to relax things and keep you nervous newbies from getting those thoughts in your head that can translate into performance anxiety. This can happen to the best of them so don't be too concerned. If you have continued problems or notice any other symptoms that are cause for concern set an appointment with your physician.

I'm not a provider.  but I'm going to give you my thoughts anyway.  

1)  You did not do anything wrong in the encounter and you don't need to be ashamed or leave a tip.  Save the tip for when the encounter exceeds your expectations.  

2)  Take your vitamin V before going and take it at the right time before you expect to have the encounter.

3)  Be bruitaly honest with yourself.  Was there something about the lady that turned you off?  This may be NO fault of hers, it just may be the way that it is.  If so, learn from the experience and don't make the same mistake twice.

ClareQuilty3396 reads

Definitely see a doctor or urologist and get a prescription for Viagra or one of the newer ED drugs.

SweetJaclyn3783 reads

I have had that happen a couple of times and the only thing that I ever wondered was what didn't I do?  I went over and over the session to make sure that I did my best to make it enjoyable.  Every single time that it's happened, the gentleman has always returned to open arms and everything has gone much smoother.  Don't worry about it... I'm sure that she would welcome you back and hey, if she doesn't, it's her loss!  There are other Providers out there that aren't so judgemental!  

Kisses,
Jaclyn :)

Jill Morgan3343 reads

I've seen several clients with the same situation.

It's a tad awkward but for me it's not all about the sex. It's the conversation, cuddling and laughter that you can share with someone and still make a comfortable encounter.


xoxo, Jill

I'm not a provider but I would advise you get your testosterone level checked before you spend the $ on V, if your emotional state is OK.  I am 52 and had a problem like this after a fractured vertebrae and evential back surgery.  All the drugs, especially the pain medication, put my hormone production into hybernation.  While I assumed nerve damage or age related erectile dysfunction it turned out I was very low on Mr. T.  Several injections got the machinery humming again and I now have normal levels and do not need V.  I tend to think this is overlooked due to marketing on V and others, IMHO.

You know, there are two sides to every story. As an all too often one trick pony myself, once I pop, that's it. But there is abslutely no reason not enjoy throughly yourself by doing other things like DATY. I love to pleasure my lady as much as she pleasures me. Often, that is all I need to get myself going again!

I find that if you adopt that attitude, it really doesn't matter what happens as long as it mutually works out for the two of you. After all, you are paying her only for her time.

Register Now!