So I made a booking w a high-end touring provider who was $1,200 per hour.  This lady is legit w/ good reviews here.  

She required a 25% ($400) deposit to book. So I did as I usually have no problem with that as long as I know the provider is legit based on reviews etc.  

The night before the date, I had a family matter come up and I emailed to ask to reschedule the date for another time while she was on her same tour. She replied: "Sorry I am fully booked the rest of my trip, I'm sorry you can't make it but I will require my rate paid in full now (remaining $800).  

wait what?  Why does she require me to pay the FULL rate? Isn't the point of a smaller deposit, so that if the client has to cancel or NCNS, then the provider at least gets a portion of that back?  What is the point of charging me $400 deposit, if I have to cancel then you are going to demand the full rate? Why not just insist on a FULL RATE deposit then??

After a little back and forth and her insistence I decided to just pay her the full rate and move on.  

She is a well connected provider and I assumed that if I didn't pay it all I would end up on some client blacklist.  I feel very annoyed about this however.  Was she right to do this?  NOWHERE on her site is it listed that if the client needs to cancel/reschedule then the full rate must be paid.  I feel bad that I had to cancel but I really feel like she took advantage of me here, I was happy to reschedule on my end.

Buddy you got hosed! If her ads or site have a specific cancellation policy, then that's what I would have followed.

it was a 33% deposit, according to Conan the Matharian.  

 
Second, what I would have done is:

1. Ask her to point out where on her web site or in any of her communications with you there was mention of a requirement to pay 100% of the session fee if the client cancels within a specific time window. If she could not do that, then I’d let her know I didn’t think it was right that I should have to pay another $800.

2. If there was a published penalty of 100% for a late cancellation, I’d pay it but ask that she refund it if she were able to fill that spot… which seems very possible, given that she’s otherwise fully booked for her tour. IMO a “legit” provider would volunteer to do that, as it would be unprofessional to charge a penalty in that case.

rconca_ter,
 I'll be honest with you. You screwed yourself. What you should have done was ask questions like "What if something comes up? Can I cancel without being charged extra?"  Why don't you contact me!? Schedule a date with me.  

                                               JANET  
                           Email: [email protected]

Indeed I can't math!  apologies.  

On your first point, yes that's basically how our conversation went. I said I thought it was a bit excessive, given that it wasn't clear on her site and I offered to reschedule at full rate in addition to forfeiting my original  $400 deposit.   She just went off on how she has a right to charge a "cancellation fee" (THE FULL ENCHILADA I guess) in addition to the deposit since that was a slot she otherwise could have booked.  

She did say however that if she had another slot open for me on that tour that she wouldn't have made me pay the rate twice, but since that wasn't an option, she needed to charge the full amount.  I didn't feel like arguing with her further, as I just felt I was going to get cut off and blacklisted.  

I'm not sure what the lesson learned here is. I feel that I will continue providing deposits, as most of the high end providers are requiring them now. I'll need to pay more attention to the cancellation policies (if they exist) but not something I want to ask for fine details before we meet as I don't want to come across as a douchebag and I hardly ever cancel.   I understand the need for deposits I guess. But you are right, I should have asked for a refund if she could fill it (not fully expecting her to be honest about that though).

Get screwed over for a deposit, you got screwed over for a whole session fee. The deposit doesn’t really matter.  

 
If you’d booked her with no deposit and canceled the night before, she still would have demanded the full fare. You still would’ve been worried about blacklists and paid it. Right?

 
Sorry that happened to you. It sounds very frustrating. If she doesn’t have a clear cancellation policy on her ad or site or emails, that’s BS in my opinion. In the absence of any policy stating otherwise, it’s generally accepted that the deposit is what the client forfeits if they cancel. That’s the whole point of the deposit.

yes, thank you for the vindication.  

You're right, even if I didn't provide the $400 deposit (which I was happy to forfeit) she would have likely requested the full rate anyway.  

And If I say no? Maybe she tweets about it, tells her large network of friends and bookers, gets my email and # on a blacklist.  I can't deal w that drama.

In my experience, girls at that price almost always have it very clearly stated on their rate or etiquette page or her ads that cancellations under a certain time line (most women, its 24 hours prior) result in her entire fee being due.  
Sometimes they even follow that up when you contact them for a date in their email/text response.  
If she truly did not have that listed anywhere as you claim, then that was unprofessional of her to say the least to demand the additional $800. She should have taken the loss, chalked it up to a lesson learned and change her publicly available, online policy.  
Sorry this happened to you. The way you are describing it, she was very unfair to you and placed you in a very untenable position.

What does she say about cancellation?
You weren't screwed if her policy was to pay in full if you cancel less than x hours before the appointment.

First, you broke the cardinal hobbyist rule - no deposits ever…ever…ever!! I assume you knew that, but thought you wouldn’t get burned by it! Well hopefully you learned your lesson. You also should have known when you made the deposit, the money was gone whether she cancelled or ghosted or you cancelled, even for good reason. The concept of full fee for a session due upon cancellation is BS, unless the full amount of session fee was deposited!  You know what’s coming next - you were equally stupid to send her the balance due for the session!  One blackball is inevitable over time due to no fault of your own, and it sounds like you had a legitimate excuse to cancel. Plus she got to keep $400! I think most providers would be happy about that! If she’s truly that hot, of course she will fill the time slot! A provider can check your reliability using references, and then she has to take a leap of faith, just like you set aside time to see her on speculation. If you don’t want to get burned again, don’t put up anymore deposits!!

END OF MESSAGE

Sorry this happened, but IMO she screwed you. She needs a clear policy, otherwise you don't owe it to her. If it were me, I might not book her if she shows inflexibility. Her posting her policy allows me to make this decision before booking her. If she doesn't spell it out, but then expects it, that just is not fair. If she does spell it out and you book her, you respect her rules.

You inferred she'd blacklist you, but did she say that? Did she threaten to out you? Was there an opportunity to just move on without dropping another 8 bills?

I skimmed over that. Thanks.

So in answer to his OP, he screwed himself by paying in full and he should call out this provider if all he claims is true. OTOH, I don't really care that much since I'd never pay a deposit.

-- Modified on 5/7/2024 3:53:04 PM

He, like many of us, just don't want or need the headache or the drama and calling her out could lead to a lot more than he is willing to deal with. If everything he is saying is true, she put him in a very, very bad spot with nothing but bad options. He has to make the choice between the terrible options left to him. I wont judge him either way as it's an impossible choice, imo.

I dont really get it.

My doctors typically bills me (or rather my insurance) several thousands of dollars a visit, yet the cancelation fee is anywhere from fifty to a hunnid.  

 
This is the only business I can think of that when service is canceled, requires the full price in many cases. And I cannot really get the reasoning. And no, "because they can" isn't good enough reasoning

touche touche, can't really deny any of what you said.  

 
I have sent several deposits before and hadn't run into any issues yet, but yeah this one burned me for sure.  

 
I mean the fact is several providers require them and it's either send it or don't see them. I can say many times it's been more than worth it so if you never send a deposit you are missing out on some great opportunities. I'm willing to take the chance usually. But  I never even imagined this scenario where she would insist on the whole fee.  

pretty much nailed it, not worth the trouble. It wasn't life changing money lost.  

But yeah I assumed ppl would like to know who it is but it doesn't make sense for me to say publicly or privately. Aside from this incident she seems like a great provider and I have seen several of her friends that have vouched for her.  

She did not threaten me, want to make that clear. I just figured if I didn't pay, that she would at least spread the word to her inner circle to block my #. I know there are easy ways to get on a blacklist, I'd rather avoid it. Maybe she would have done nothing, but wasn't willing to take that chance.

In this case, if we take the OP at his word, I agree with you. If we are talking about women who clearly state what their cancellation fee is, then I don't. To me, it's just about policies and the transparency of them. A provider can have any policy she wishes as long as she is transparent and open about them BEFORE I make a date with her.  
The client can choose to go elsewhere if he doesnt like the terms, like I do many times re: a deposit policy that I feel is too high, or asks for a method I dont feel comfortable with, etc etc

He implied it. You inferred it. I think we all did.  
If you call me pedantic now, I’ll understand.  

 
Anyways in one of his follow up posts he gave more details about their post-cancellation communications. He doesn’t claim she threatened blackballs but she doesn’t sound like the type to just let it go either. He could’ve kept the 8, but visions of blacklists, back channels and tweets with his phone number in the hashtag were dancing in his head. Tough choice.

If you're seeking confirmation, yes you got screwed.  Worse case scenario, she made $1,200 for doing absolutely nothing, best case (for her) is she filled your appointment slot and made $2,400 (your $1,200 plus another clients $1,200).  I have seen some ads that state within a certain time parameter, the full rate is due, but if you're saying it wasn't specified then it shouldn't have been paid.  

I have paid a deposit before (although it was presented as funds to cover the incall location).  But, I'm generally reluctant to do so.  I certainly would not have paid the additional 8C.  But, I am in a big market, so there are plenty of fish, etc., etc.

 
One thing to consider, should you find yourself in similar circumstances, is to ask her whether you can apply the credit to her next tour?  Even if it takes another year for her to come around, at least you have the option.

I actually understand basic grammar and vocabulary. And I was asking about how he interpreted her actions (inference), not about how he meant to describe to us her behavior (implication).

He interpreted her actions in a certain way, therefore he inferred. Or at least that's what I asked.  

Or do I need to keep reminding you you're not the smartest guy in the room.

-- Modified on 5/7/2024 9:14:47 PM

-- Modified on 5/7/2024 9:39:24 PM

like paying deposits NOW?   As Blue says above, you pay a deposit, you deserve whatever happens because of it.  I'm always amused that the hotshots that pay deposits for "high-end" pussy expect they will be treated fairly no matter what happens.  I stayed in a luxury hotel on the East Coast a few weeks ago.  The nightly rate was $2400 for the suite I booked.  They took a deposit of $600, and it clearly stated on their website that if I cancel less than 48 hours before check-in time on the first night, they would bill my credit card for the balance of the first night's rate.  The deposit was only to make them feel better about the prospect that I would show up in the first place, but if I didn't, they can still slam my card for the balance of ONE night.  

 
Chances are, a big-name hotel is going to stick to their policy, but they also give you all of the info up front so you can make an informed decision.  Providers often make up their own rules on the fly and you won't find anything on their website that explained some of the nuances about how they do business.  

 
If you see enough providers, like I do, that will vouch for you, that should be good enough to get an appointment with many other providers.  When it's not, I merely put line through her name and move on to the next girl on my to-do list.  With that said, you should name the provider here as a public service so that others don't get taken like you did.  Telling this story of getting ripped off without naming her just seems like whining.

END OF MESSAGE

All he has to do is post something like:
"Had plans to see X who is touring my area. Made the arrangements and paid the indicated deposit. An emergency came up and I let her know I had to cancel. She demanded full payment even though she does not have any posted cancellation policy."  

 
Personally I think he should have told her that and only let her keep the deposit. If she wants to blacklist me for that fine with me. I don't want to see that type of person anyhow and have to wonder just how great a session it would have actually been. If other providers want to BL me for pointing out her behavrior that's fine too. Now, this is also one reason I prefer agencies -- I only have to deal with the agency and will tent to spend more with the agecny that some independant as in many cases even a good session will lack the characteristics for many (or any) repeats. But as other ladies come I'll go see them so the agency has a bigger stake in not trying to screw me over for some onetime gain.

for saying "Fuck Deposits"!

In general.

And as I've said, "because they can" is not a satisfactory answer to me. When something is drastically different in a business model from other ibdustries, I would like to know the rationale.

The real question, are you still going to pay those deposits?  Consider it a life lesson.

Many things in life are not satisfactory to me either, but sometimes there is no other answer.  
When I go to a Phillies game, why is it $14 for a beer there, when I can get that same exact beer at my neighborhood bar for $6? It's "because they can."
Why is it my seat on a flight may be $200 higher than the person seated right next me? Its "because they can."
You almost always look at these things from the consumer/client side of things. I have done the same in these particular cases re: the OPs point. As long as the "business" i.e. providers, are clear what their policies are upfront, I have zero problem with whatever they request and yet it triggers you deeply for some reason.  
They want to charge $5000 an hour? Go for it. Need 100% deposit sent via Venmo? Be my guest. Need my social security number? Ask away. The answer from me will be a hard "no" on all accounts.  
But the beauty of being the consumer is that I have choices and can play with ladies that have less intrusive, more agreeable terms. That's just capitalism at work, isn't it?

That is your choice. But wording his public post and out her as you advise, could land him in hot water. No, that wouldn't be fair to him but he deemed it wasn't worth it.  
Some things are worth fighting for and taking the risk that comes with that fight. The OP has decided it isn't worth that risk. He knows more about the facts of this matter, his comfort level and risk tolerance than you do, obviously, and that is why we shouldn't question his decision. He was screwed either way and it's easy for others to say "Out her!" They/you don't have to deal with the repercussions.

-- Modified on 5/8/2024 11:05:58 AM

Are you really this dense? This shit doesn't work like other industries because it is completely different from other industries.  

 
This industry is illegal, so any comparisons to legal commerce should be thrown out the window to start. Other businesses are regulated, this one is not. Also this business has higher risks. Your doctor isn't going to get arrested. Your doctor probably isn't at risk to be raped and murdered by their clients. This business has high up front costs. Providers usually have to spend a bunch of money up front on hotels and other things, so there is risk of financial loss with a no-show. Plenty of luxury industries/service providers have high deposits and high cancellation fees. Escorting  

 
I bitch about deposits all the time but I understand why providers use them and will continue to pay them at my discretion. I've never paid a cancellation fee because I never cancelled an appointment. Honestly, most guys who bitch about deposits and costs are just mad that they can't afford a women that they view as beneath them. They look down at sex workers and women in general and get mad when sex workers aren't available to them. It reminds them the one thing they have (money) isn't actually THAT valuable.

So sorry this happened to you. I had 2 clients last year here in Myrtle Beach tell me they lost deposits too. After the second guy told me that, I went straight to my computer & did an edit, adding that I never ask for money before our appointment. I am by no means saying that the people that do are all bad, but that's a gamble with your money for sure. I know why they do it. It's risky with our time b/c unfortunately so many are playing games. Both ways. That is their security their time isn't completely wasted & that you show up. I take the risk, I don't have many no shows, but it does happen & I just ban them as best as I can. (Fool me once, lol). I just found out recently a butthurt guy I banned a looong time ago has been posting bad reviews about me that are SOOO not true. For years! Talk about psycho. I never met him, he harassed me for a long time, then started making his life about "Me" I guess. Dodged that bullet by never letting him in.  Most people can tell what is real & what isn't, review wise. It's tough out here on both sides. If it were me, I wouldn't do deposits unless you know someone that has personally seen them, keyboard warriors can't always be trusted, as I have recently found out. Even then, they can pick up & go, or ignore you & block your number. Play smart guys, Hugs!

Ugh. You are right. I don't feel like a cancellation deserves bad words. I ban No shows, but don't put them on a blacklist, or call them out. Now if someone HURT me, yeah! But I've never had that happen. Only a bad review from a client that was butthurt bc he didnt READ my website, got ugly with me, I banned him after he harassed me for months, & he has now made it his life mission to destroy me online with lies. There's douchy people in this world we live in & it is such a shame!

He knows he was screwed and has no intention of trying to do anything about it, including warning others. He apparently doesn't even hold ill will towards her.

I think guys need to understand what happens when you get blacklisted. Usually a provider means they will add you to a personal black list and not see you. While there are a handful of forums and resources there aren't any widely used national blacklists, databases or review boards for clients. Also many providers have learned not to trust these resources for various reasons. Being blacklisted usually means this provider will not see you again. It doesn't mean other providers will never see you again. She may post about you somewhere but it doesn't mean that every other provider will check it or care about it too. It is obviously best to avoid being blacklisted, especially if you want to see independent high end providers.

However if OP retaliated and named the provider, you better believe OP would end up on multiple black lists and his info would be posted across social media. OP is probably making the right decision. I also bet OP is leaving some info out, and if we got the providers perspective we might think differently. There's a chance this provider lays out their cancellation policy and OP just missed it.

It is easy to say no deposits but deposits are required by a huge majority of independent providers these days. This is why it is important to check the review history of the "no deposits" crowd. Most of their reviews are at agencies. Nothing wrong with this but agencies are a different beast and a different level of service. It is a different market segment. If you're seeing high end, independent escorts then you know you get what you pay for. All high end, independent escorts require deposits and have harsh cancellation policies. If you want to see these providers you have to do it on their terms. Like it or not, the hotter they are the more they get away with.

END OF MESSAGE

His will, be it “ill” or not is his business. Again, she put him in a terrible position and he, and he alone, needs to decide what is best for him as he knows so much more about his vulnerability  
than you you or I. Don’t blame him. Blame  the girl.

Yet another example of why I pass on providers who require a deposit.  It's their choice, but it is also mine and guess what, never an issue is 25+ years of enjoyable times with wonderful women.

guy in the room?"  Hands down, this gets the award for the most ironic post of the year.  And from the guy who once posted that he had been a TER member for longer than TER has been in existence.  Lol

 
Drebin should give you a drubbing.  

I dont need to know that you're OK with whatever rules the seller sets. I already know this. I know that if the seller says you need to cut off your dick in order to join the club, it's OK with you.
That is NOT what I asked.  

 
I'm asking as to WHY. I don't care if you think a seller is omnipotent and can do whatever the fuck they want. I feel really sorry for your slave mentality, but that isn't what I asked. If you can't answer me with rationale, then don't.  

 
"When I go to a Phillies game, why is it $14 for a beer there, when I can get that same exact beer at my neighborhood bar for $6? It's "because they can."

 
No, the answer is that for baseball games, just like in theme parks, there are no in and outs when you're in. The answer isn't "because they can" like you say it is. Stop making shit up.  

The demand for beer is inelastic once you enter the stadium. In order to buy a beer from a competing vendor, you need to exit the stadium and lose your ticket. If your neighborhood bar  and any bar in vicinity was allowed in at mlb stadium at no charge and was allowed to sell to anyone in the stadium, no one would buy beer at stadium prices. The mlb sells licenses for vendors to sell at the game, effectively stopping all guise of free and competitive market as far as beer vendors are concerned.  

 
"Why is it my seat on a flight may be $200 higher than the person seated right next me? Its "because they can.""

 

No, the answer is airline tickets are heavily dependent on time they're purchased. Dynamic pricing is based on supply and demand, as  aircraft capacity as well as flight frequency are both limited and there usually isn't a faster travel alternative beyond let's say 1.5k miles.

 

 

So no, the answer to both of these isn't "because they can". The answers are both rooted in economics and I can explain them easily.  

 
What I can't explain is how a service person's cancellation fee is the SAME as service fee. Just off common sense, it gives the seller an incentive to provoke a cancel over actually providing a service. If the pay is the same, most people would rather do no work and receive pay, than do an hour worth of work and receive the same pay. That's just common sense.  

 
I don't understand how a surgeon can allow a patient to cancel a 50k surgery for 50 bucks, yet a provider who charges 500 wants the entire fee for service they haven't actually provided.  

 
"You almost always look at these things from the consumer/client side of things."  

You're right, I am a consumer and champion consumer rights. Consumers can and do complain about practices they find predatory, unfair, or humiliating. Consumers often want justification for policy change. Consumers and investors alike demand answers from sellers when they create new policies and pricing strategies.  

 
For you, you think anything the seller does is OK as long as they lay out the rules in the beginning. And to me it isn't. Just because you say "I'm about to rape You haha" as a precursor, doesn't make what you're about to do anymore justified.  

 
For whatever reason in your mind the consumer is a voiceless mannequin whose only two choices are to take it or leave it... Not ask for rationale or complain vocally and publicly.  

 

"because they can" is a cheap blanket nonanswer that gives a Carte Blanche to whatever entity to do whatever they want. Stop using it as reasoning as to why. If anyone uses it as reasoning, they concede there is no good reason and the entity is simply taking advantage of the consumer because there are no consequences to their actions. Which makes them a greedy POS that is only concerned with profits, in my book.

Just happened to me.

Cost of doing business.

But why is it  taboo to rat them out?  I know there is a client blacklist out there.

I there was a provider blacklist wouldn't that balance out everything.

I think that stealing deposits and catfishing is more common that most will admit.

So many use fake pics and are still "verified".     Verified means nothing.

You answer the way you want, and I'll answer the way I want. If you don't like my answers, cease asking me questions.  
You just seem to want to refute the core essence of unregulated capitalism in this illegal market, as is your want.
The seller sets a price and also gets to sets rules and protocols. The buyer then agrees or goes to their competitor. This is news to you? Now, am I happy with all of the end results? Of course not! The changes the last 3-4 years have been tough on everyone as I have stated numerous times.  
The difference between us is that you seem to want to bang your head against the wall in every thread like this one when you think the seller is acting unfairly, looking desperately for some rationale to satisfy you that will never materialize. Fine, complain away. Keep looking for that elusive unicorn if you must.  
But at the end of the day you will just walk away with a concussion. I walk away and look for another women who will satisfy most/all of my needs.  
You live in a world of how things "should be" while I live in the world of "what is." I am just more pragmatic and you more of a dreamer. Does that make me right and you wrong? Nope. It just makes your outlook on this 180 degrees different from mine.  
I can live with that every day of the week. Can you?

You have failed to provide any rationale. In fact you said any seller can attempt any action without any rationale as long as they make that action known beforehand.  

 
So yes, that's not an answer to my question. That's trying to justify any action by any seller in any biz.  

 
You also tried using real world examples, but they were easily debunked as there is rationale and explanation for everything a major seller or vendor does. Now you're hiding behind "oh but it's illegal". So why did you use real world examples of baseball vendors or airline tix?  

 
Believe it or not, in a two way business, seller has an obligation to a buyer. And certain actions by a company or seller always trigger customer responses. Certain actions of sellers are forbidden by legislature. Customers in any biz, whether legal or illegal, are allowed to criticize any part of the product or business model they do not like. In any biz.  

If you cannot explain a sellers action, then you don't have an answer for my question.  

 

And Robert. The main difference between you and me is not the nonsense you wrote. I don't bang my head against anything. I champion consumer rights in any community, I don't like sellers taking advantage of buyers in any hobby. I like to call out unfair practices and make sure there is an attention spotlight lit well on such practices.  

And this hobby isn't any different from any other hobby, unlike how it is with you. Which brings me to the real difference between you and me.  

 
The main difference between you and me is that only one of us allows empathy for a certain group to influence what's fair and what isn't. And that one isn't me. I treat any seller in any biz exactly the same way. Doesn't matter what gender what age what type of work etc.

-- Modified on 5/8/2024 4:28:14 PM

I dont see what so special about sucking dick that it has to be put in its own category. Many women, men and NBs suck dick very often.  

Sorry!  

Your post does not answer the question I have. Higher operational costs doesn't answer how it is OK to receive the same fee regardless of whether service was conducted or not.

 
A flat fee I can see. A 30% fee is steep but I can still see it, maybe. A full price fee for a service you never had is robbery.

 

As far as your last paragraph, you went fully off the rails, making a really stupid generalization of how buyers don't like deposits and big fees because they look down on working women. Lol.  

 
 Ie, you played a gender card. Well that was dumb. You guys realize when you attempt to play this card when the discussion is strictly buyer vs seller, YOU are the ones being sexist and discriminatory?

-- Modified on 5/8/2024 4:22:22 PM

It is NOT "robbery" IF the client is told beforehand of the rules and penalties for not following such. I sided with the OP here because I am taking him at his word for the sake of the argument.
But in general, it is the BUYERS responsibility to engage or not engage in a service where all the rules and protocols are clearly listed. Only a child would cry about a provider following through with a penalty she has clearly communicated to the client if he fails to meet his obligation.  
You seem to want to take ALL responsibility off the buyer...just like a child. Now go get that concussion looked into. It is severely making you sound so silly and so obsessed. lol.

I was talking about in general. In fact you asked me in this very thread if I meant in general and I explicitly replied to you.  

 
And yet now you're talking about the op. What the fuck? Did you forget you asking me in this thread whether I meant in this case or in all cases? Are you sober?  

 
I said, in general having a cancelation fee equal to service fee in any biz in the world, is robbery to me. No matter whether it was communicated or not before.

 
If you're running a ponzi scheme and you ask for my money and you say yeah it's ponzi scheme, you're still committing a robbery.

 
Anytime anyone to attempts to justifiy unfair and unjust practices towards consumers, in any business, I'm going to push back on. Hard.

 
And no, I am a big believer in accountability and in responsibility. Just because I think hotel resort fees and bs restaurant fees are robbery as well doesn't mean I'm not accountable. If a customer signs an agreement, then yes - he's accountable for it. That doesn't mean literally anything he signs OK in terms of ethical implications, fairness and common sense.

-- Modified on 5/8/2024 5:03:40 PM

END OF MESSAGE

There ain't no break here. I do what I think is important.  

A cancellation fee in the same amount as service fee is laughable, indefensible and is not practiced in any real world business. There is no rationale for it.  

You trying to justify it in any way, will always elicit a public response from me. Not only that, I think I will make separate threads on this so it has even more visibility.  

 
But Im sure you will call me a misogynist just like you call cdl one.

Guts need to stop paying deposits and simping to these GPS ladies.  And don't get me started on their fucking rates.

I'd be interested in hear both what your think a respectable and well reviewed provider would do in response to a posting like I suggested. Nice and simple, not accusing or bemoaning anything, just noting how things played out.  I would also like to hear of any specific firsthand experience you have with similar types of situations and what the "hot water" ended up being.

Definitely not rebooking her. No interest in publically dragging her through the mud either—what's the point? Sure, it might entertain everyone and provide intel, but it's pointless for me.  

Despite this mishap, she’s respected and vouched for by other providers I trust. I don’t think she’s out scamming with deposits; she just lacks business acumen.  

what about sites like VerifyHim?  Many years ago a close provider once showed my info to me on there and I was blown away.  

But yeah you're right, the risk of me not paying and her personally blacklisting me is lesser than if I were to put her on blast here.  I've been in this hobby for over 20+ years and have kept a low profile and want to keep it that way. Not trying to be some kind of hero whistleblower, sorry guys.  

Her site only mentions a deposit, no cancellation fee. She had a couple ads up on tryst but nothing was stated there either. But let me ask you this, even IF she did have this cancellation policy, what is the point of charging a 33% deposit on booking? If your policy is to charge the full fee upon cancellation, why not charge $1,200 up front. You must pay $,1200 to see me, if you cancel then you don't receive back your deposit. Simple.

"I dont see what so special about sucking dick that it has to be put in its own category. Many women, men and NBs suck dick very often."

I mean if so many men and women are sucking dick for free then why are you on this site paying for it?

The thing is you talk about fairness and stuff but its clear you're just kind of cheap. Your review history is filled with agency girls charging $300 an hour or less. You're just not in the high end market place and so your opinion on cancellation policies of high end escorts is kind of moot. I think the process for buying a Ferrari is ridiculous but it doesn't matter, I can't afford a Ferrari and the people that can gladly pay the deposits and jump through the hoops.

And he is saying it is not worth the risk to him to find out and guess what? HE gets to make that call as he will have to suffer the consequences of those actions and not you.

The rationale is clearly obvious to everyone but you. The full rate charge for cancellations inside 24 hours is a common norm in this industry. What’s not a norm is charging the 100% fee without announcing it as a cancellation policy.  That’s the issue in this conversation. Was the OP screwed by the provider? The general consensus seems to be yes, and Robert laid out a good explanation why the answer is yes.

You, again, seem to have nothing better to do than attempt to derail threads here. You want an explanation of the rationale that everyone so clearly sees (even though some disagree and feel that it’s extreme?) Here’s the rationale, oh clueless one:

Full payment for cancellations inside 24 hours is applied because the provider blocked out said time for x dollars. If the client cancels at short notice, it becomes near impossible and unrealistic for the provider to reschedule and rebook said time slot, and the projected income is lost.  

Disagree with the rationale? Fine, many do. Then just don’t book providers with full cancellation policies.

Claim to not understand the rationale for the policy? Don’t try to make us believe that you’re really so stupid you don’t understand the policy.

There's a lot about the story I don't know so I can't comment fully. I don't know how much advanced notice you gave. I haven't seen her social media, website or tryst ad.

I've read through lots of ads and websites where providers post their policies. If you cancel with advanced notice notice, some will say you forfeit the deposit others will allow you to apply it to a future booking. If you cancel within 48 hours, they tend to be less forgiving and you start to lose deposits. If you're within 24 hours, it isn't uncommon to demand the entire amount especially with higher end providers on tour. So I would use that guideline to determine what is or isn't reasonable. If you cancelled same day or night before, I could definitely see things from her point of view (especially if she's fully booked, on tour and/or you blocked a multi-hour).

So, here is the rational behind deposits and cancellation fees. Deposits cover certain upfront costs (travel/hotel/makeup) so that if you disappear or flake on them they can recover some economic loss. Also, if paid electronically it creates a trail back to you if you end up being dangerous and harmful. The rational behind the cancellation fee is that she has limited time to make money. Most clients are going to be booking between 6pm-10pm. If she said no to other clients and can't book others you messed with her income. At that point its less of a cancellation and more like breach of contract. In the legal world, if you break a contract you can be held liable for performance. That is the equivalence.

She can't take you to court, of course. She can hold you accountable in other ways. Which as I said, not advisable to mess with if you care about your reputation.

So you didn't answer what's so special about sucking dick when you are the one who claimed this. Noted.

 
As for your question.  
I can cut my hair myself. I have pro clippers, pro trimmers and everything a good barber uses. Sometimes I do cut hair myself as my haircut is quite simple.  

But most of the time I use a barber. Is being a barber anything special to the point it needs to be treated in a different way from any other biz? My answer is a resounding no.

Why is sucking dick any different? What makes this biz so special it can enjoy lax criticism and predatory tactics without being disturbed? Who gave it this right?  

 
There are people like Robert, for example, who give this biz rights a seller never has in any other biz, simply because he feels empathy for working women.  

Im not one of these people. Honesty and treating customers well is thicker than any blood let alone water.  

 
As far as my opinion being moot because I see kgirls, this is more asinine logic from you. A predatory policy is a predatory policy no matter the stakes and anyone can discuss whether or not it's predatory. There is no prerequisite for a such discussion.

I think some guys forget who has the power. The power is in the $$$$, if more think like you and I then guess what ? Policy for deposits will be changed, yet the bleeding hearts out there continue to play the deposit game. I’M DONE WITH IT.

If you don't think a blow job is special why do you pay so much for it so often? Why don't you just jerk off for free? The reason why it is different is because giving random strangers blowjobs for money presents a certain set of risks and means dealing with certain types of stress/situations that most people don't want to deal with. As a result, providers command a premium for the services they provide compared to regular jobs and industries. So comparing BJs for hire to other, well regulated and legal industries is retarded and logically unsound. That's the answer, its pretty straight forward.

AND, if we are to compare it to other industries then simple capitalist logic takes over. The market bears the price it can bear based on supply and demand. Pussy and BJs are in DEMAND. There are way more guys willing to pay for sex than there are women selling sex. This gives providers market power, which has increased since COVID. You might think its not fair but there are plenty of guys with money that don't care. This is why I point out that you see KGirls. It shows that most guys operating in this market don't actually think it is a predatory policy. It is to point out that you have a ton of experience in this matter. It shows that you don't deal with high end providers, you aren't their customer, and they don't care about your opinion. It also shows that there are tons of alternatives. If you don't want to deal with deposits, screening and cancellation fees than stick with the KGirls, brothels and massage parlors. If you want to fool around for 3 hours with a drop dead gorgeous woman wearing designer dresses and luxury lingerie than you have to deal with all that garbage.  

"There are people like Robert, for example, who give this biz rights a seller never has in any other biz, simply because he feels empathy for working women.  
 
Im not one of these people. Honesty and treating customers well is thicker than any blood let alone water."

I am no simp but bragging about having no empathy isn't a great thing or a good look. I understand this is a business but we are paying for a service, not a product. The providers are humans, not a toy, who deserve at a basic level respect and empathy. I don't expect the providers to like me, respect me, or care about me but I still have empathy for other humans. You need to adjust your perspective because customer service is not above blood in any rational world.

I asked for rationale of full service fee. Not partial fee like it's done in any other industry, full fee.

And no, full service fee applied to cancellation isnt the norm in this industry.  

We have already discussed that no other industry does this. So what make this industry so special? No answer.  

 
"because I can" is what a fucking bully with a sly smile says before you hit them in the mouth and then they stay quiet.

 

If I book a two week stay at a hotel, and cancel on the day of checkin, I will only pay a tiny fraction of the cancellation fee. Wi will not pay many thousands of dollars. This is a fact.  

 
If I book a doctors appointment and cancel last minure I will only pay the flat cancelation fee, not the fee for the entire appointment. This is another fact.  

 
And yes, I have canceled ten minutes before with a doctor who couldn't fill his slots. Guess what I paid, cks?  
The same fraction of the fee of the procedure. Because I couldn't make it to the doctor because of extremely heavy traffic.  

 
So this whole "Full payment for If the client cancels at short notice, it becomes near impossible and unrealistic for the provider to reschedule and rebook said time slot, and the projected income is lost" was applied to the doctor. And he ate that loss. Because he's a seller who isn't engaged in predatory practices.  

 
Once again, there is no rationale to have full session price be the cancellation fee. The only rationale I see is greed for money. But of course no one here can say this.  

 
And greed isn't good rationale either. But it's at least honest and screams I care more about $ than the customer.  

 

And leave it to you to normalize shitty predatory practices instead of condemning them. Disgusting.

hilarious.

You asked for the rationale and it was provided to you. You then went off on a meandering diatribe. Here’s the thing, Rocket. You asked for the rationale and you received it.  

So you disagree with the rationale (surprising no one). That’s fine. But to get pissed when you get asked what the rationale is and get the answer, you’re only exposing your own stupidity. At this point, I’m not sure if it’s just basic stupidity. Are you by any chance on the spectrum?

LoL! Always funny when someone obviously more spun up than I am tells me to calm down or ease up.  

 
Did I hit a nerve? Try not to take it so personally. You’re being very un-Dude. Remember, I’m just some stranger on the internet. Not that you care, but I don’t think you’re a bad guy; just maybe a bit prickly.  

 
How do you not realize I was saying it in a friendly way? It’s not like I ran in here with my insecurity on fire, starting talks about who’s the smartest of them all. I acknowledged I was being pedantic. I made a reference to a popular show even.  

 
Hopefully I can cram enough really bad jokes into this post to get everyone to realize I’m being lighthearted.  

 
I still think your post can easily be read either way, but of course I see what you’re saying. If I wanted to be a putz I’d say we’re both technically correct; he inferred from her as you said, and then we inferred from his post as I said. But I don’t have a problem admitting when I’m mistaken, which I believe I was.

 
Inferences flying around all over the place in here. Of course, the inference only exists…. Because of the implication!

 
Axssshooally, I am the smartest guy in the room. I know because as I look around the room, I see I’m the only one here right now.  LoL!  
If you knew me at all, you’d know that’s the only time I think I’m the smartest in the room. A cool little reminder that none of us here can really know each other just by hanging out on the same corner of the web.  

 
Smartest guy on the board though? Nope not me. Certain folks work very hard to prove they’re the smartest around here. They’ve earned it.  

 
If you understood grammar as well as you seem to need me to believe you do, then you’d know that your last sentence was a question. Now, THAT is something so RIDICULOUSLY  minor and pedantic that I would only bother to point it out to someone who’s throwing rocks for no apparent reason.

I actually sort of agree with the rationale you provided, but only for fractional cost just like it's done everywhere else and in any other industry.  

 
The question always was what's the rationale behind charging a full session price - unlike what any other business does.

If my doctor takes 50 dollar cancellation for an appointment, why should seller of sexual services be any different? What's so special about them they abide by different fucking rules.  

 
If everyone else has an established fractional and flat fees what is so fucking special in selling sexual services that they needed to make it full price of the service - something no one  else does?  

 
That was the question. One of the answers I received is because I get my dick sucked. Which also doeant make much sense.

I have required a deposit to book, since 2010. Every provider has her personal policies. Does it clearly state on her website you owe the entire booking fee if you cancel with 24 hours, or less notice? I’m curious to see her website. Why not share?  

Kiss 💋 Keep it super simple.  

I am sorry this happened to you. I have empathy & care because life is ruff. I don’t tour anymore because it’s a loss without requiring deposits. I refund deposits no problem. I have integrity. I do understand window of opportunities when it comes to booking hotels, transportation, travel, etc. I don’t know everything she’s invested, but sharing is caring.  

Offering to reschedule next tour would be an option if she repeats on a regular basis. Again, I don’t know the provider because you never cared to share. The majority of the men in this community are 100% no deposits, so you won’t get any sympathy from them.

The OP was largely asking for feedback. Yes, he mentioned being concerned about some type of reaction if he didn't comply with the demand for full payment. I'm not telling him what to do, and you should not either. I'm raising questions about just what he should prehpas expect and also what the larger ramifications of such outcomes might be for him.

 
You don't seem to even want to talk about actual cases -- and we have had such discussion on the boards here -- and that is the type of response I think gives the original poster something to think about rather than some vague, and to some extent poorly defined risk with no good prior probability assessments to make a decision on.

 
As another poster here mentioned, more often than not, the event of getting blacklisted is about the specific provider never accepting an appointment from you and ignoring all your communications (at least if you don't start making things a problem by not taking the hint). In other words, most likely the worst that was going to happen was he would never be able to see that provider. Maybe that matters a lot to the guy, maybe not. If not, and having only left the deposit as the cancelation then largely no risks to the guy.  Hopefully it's a lesson for him, both about what can happen with deposits and what to do in the future should he have to cancel. I would think (and I suspect there are plenty of cases people can post to support the supposition) that a truely well reviewed and respectable provider would not take any retalitory action because that would move them in the direction of BSC provider and not respectable provider.

Most providers would likely just personally black list the client and move on. Some may add something to the various services providers use to share info. However there is a small chance the provider retaliates in some way. The provider could expose the clients personal info on social media (which happens more frequently these days). The provider could start harassing a client and blowing up their phone/work/e-mail. The provider can try to find personal/professional contacts and out OP. Provider can threaten/extort OP. These things, while somewhat rare, do happen all the time.

This is why it is usually a bad idea to provide personal information for screening. However, high-end escorts are increasingly moving away from references and towards deposits/verification.  

If you are going to take the risk of sharing PI it is essential to 0check their social media, especially twitter and reddit. Whenever a guy had an issue with a provider I noticed a few common red flags.  If they are complaining about clients, reviews, posting texts... then stay away. If they post about leftist politics, stay away. If they always make themselves a victim in their posts, stay away. Gauge how combative they are. If they are getting in a bunch of social media beefs, stay away.

Does your omission about right-wing politics mean you're OK with that but not "leftist?" I guess, by extension, that also means that if a girl was a "leftist" but doesn't ever post about it she should ban you? And that a left-leaning provider is more likely to misuse your PI than a righty? Your raising the subject in this way means this entire post should really be on the P&R Board.

OK, so a few things I wanted to touch on for this.  
If you are going to book a "high end" provider (I am *not* one, fyi) which for argument sake we will say any provider that is charging over 1K an hour you are paying a premium for her to be "low  volume". If she is touring to an area realistically she is going to be there 2-3 days and seeing 1 clients a day. So if she only had 2 clients scheduled and did not have a wait list then yes, she is going to need the full payment to pay her expenses and make a profit.  
I just finished my tour in DC and saw a total of 9 gents over 3 days (several booked multiple hours) and had a wait list of  4 guys. I do not charge a cancellation fee and thankfully did not have any cancel on this trip but if any cancelled I could have easily filled the spot. Just a little friendly reminder that when gals tour it is expensive. We are out thousands of dollars (myself included!) before we leave the door. If you book a touring gal please keep this in mind. Just because she is "high end" does not mean that she is not going to have to eat the expense if you cancel. You are paying for low volume, expensive hotel, hair extensions, nails, and plastic surgery, even if your schedule does not allow you to enjoy them in person.  
I am not trying to dissuade from seeing a provider in any price point (please be safe always!!) but you also need to understand and take into consideration what you are signing up for when you venture out of the middle of the road provider options.  
As always,  
stay sane and stay safe

I have no issue with anyone's personal politics, I've just noticed a trend. I try to avoid politics when picking providers because I want to avoid divisive subjects when trying to have fun. In general I avoid providers who openly talk about politics, right or left.

However, providers who post about left wing politics on social media have a tendency to openly disparage their clients, complain about review boards and complain about their job. I've also noticed they have less hesitation when posting pics of client interactions. These seem like providers to avoid but to each their own.

Providers who post about right wing politics usually don't complain about their clients or jobs. It can get a bit uncomfortable when they bring up politics (which they usually do) but not enough to ruin the date.

I am with iNicky with this but I want to give you the proper space and time for clarification as your post could be read several different ways. Please be specific, bc as it reads now, a provider could post all day and night about "Right wing" politics and that somehow would be just fine? Is it really just that simple?
To me, it wouldn't be about "politics" at all. I would read a providers social media looking for photos, demeanor, decency, kindness, personality, etc i.e. things that would make me believe we would be a good match or possibly a bad one.  
I am, self admittedly, on the Left side politically on most subjects but I wont rule out a provider that shows her to be conservative IF and this is a big IF...she shows a tolerance for those different than her and is a seemingly good and honorable person. I have people in my own family that are on the opposite side of my political leanings and most of them are VERY good people, we just disagree on many issues. I can live with that. Not everyone has to think like I do.  
Long winded way of asking you what you meant as I want to give you the benefit of the doubt here as you are clearly intelligent and make very logical, well constructed posts.

I would think a high end provider would be more reasonable. Thinking of real world comparisons, typically higher end businesses that charge more of a premium are the ones more likely to bend over backwards for the customer. When you are paying more for a brand and it's reputation, it's often because you expect more, which includes customer service.

 
A high end provider charges more, and should be making more if she is doing it right. Whereas, a low end provider who is charging less and making less might feel the sting more. I get that the price of admission doesn't tell all, because someone charging $600 an hour who averages 3 hours of work a day would make more than someone who charges $1200 an hour who averages one hour a day. But I highly doubt most providers would increase their prices to make less money because it means seeing less clients. They increase there prices because they can see less clients and still make more money. That's smart business.

 
So, using this logic, she might not profit as much, but she can still recoup her money at a percentage less than 100%. And with this approach, she supports her high end brand. If Macy's yoked me with a lesser service, I would think less of them, and I would seek out another store - say Bloomingdales - where the price and brand rep matches the service. Over time, any business would weaken their reputation and value if they behaved this way. In the same notition, a provider should too. Reputation is something earned, and something one needs to work to keep. No one is entitled to it.

 
FWIW, I have had providers who had a policy and still were understanding. For an example, not that long ago I had an emergency at work, and this was only hours before the appointment. I reached out to her and asked if I could reschedule and was very apologetic. Her policy was 25% for canceling. However, she said if I sent the 25% she would rebook me and count it towards the new booking, meaning no penality for the previous appointment. This to me is a provider who earned a good reputation. She didn't just treat me like a business transaction, but like a human being. And, we had a great time together.

Most providers are probably liberal/left leaning and most providers I've been with are liberal/left leaning. I've had great times with them. It has nothing to do with their politics, it is based on their posting history. I'm not conservative or right wing. I consider myself independent with left leaning views. It has nothing to do with a provider having different beliefs, it is simply a risk assessment based on my experiences.  

 
I've noticed that providers who post about left politics tend to complain about their chosen profession and seem to resent their clients. Some go back and forth between calling sex work "exploitive" and "empowering." There is a view very popular on the left that sex work is bad but that capitalism and men with money force providers into this work against their will. These seem like red flags and I don't want to get caught up in any of that drama or trouble.  

 
Right wing providers are just MAGA posters with thirst traps. Their political posts are grating and they usually bring up politics in a session which can get annoying (I've learned to steer those conversations). However they seem to be much more comfortable with their personal choices. I rarely see them complain about their job or their clients. They seem unashamed of their profession and own their personal choices. They are a bit more easy going. That's the difference, right leaning providers come across as less threatening.

 
I don't have a preference for right leaning providers nor do I agree with them. My preference is for providers who post advertisements for and information about their business only. I treat providers like any other professional. I don't want to see my doctor, lawyer or tax accountant posting their political views on their professional social media. I don't really want to discuss politics with them, I want them to provide me a service. Same with providers. I'm looking to have fun.

I figured that’s what you were getting at when you mentioned political postings being a red flag.

My reading on the subject (to the extent such literature exists) suggests that an equally (and perhaps more) popular view on the left is that sex work should be legalized, women should be free to do as they decide with their bodies, and LE should take seriously allegations by sex workers that they have been harmed.