To be quite blunt, I'm just getting bored with her. The fire is gone. I have seen her once a month for the last two years (she's a visitor). I do not want to hurt her feelings and she does read the TER boards and she knows my handle, so she checks up on my activities. I am interested in hearing from the ladies. Thanx.
She checks up on your activities?! What does that mean? Is she your wife or your ATF and why is she checking up on you?
To see what "she checks up on my activities" mean. Anyway, do you plan on not seeing her anymore or how is that going to go? It sounds like you should have been left if she is acting like your wife. If you don't want to see her anymore then you owe her no explaination. Just start seeing others. We are providers. I don't know about anyone else but my life won't end because someone doesn't want to see me anymore. I don't form attachments like that in my provider lifestyle.
I KNOW I did not tell her. In passing conversation, she would bring up someone that I have seen and ask, "You've seen her, how did ....". As for why, who knows! I just wrote it off that women are naturally more inquistive than men.
-- Modified on 5/6/2005 11:03:26 PM
Excellent question. Do you just stop calling? I in the same sort of situation where I don't know how to break it off. Ladies, please tell us what is the best way to do this! THANKS
Be honest and up front.
Tell her you want to try some variety.
She can't have any problem with that as I'm sure she has plenty of variety.
Just be honest and tell her.
Just my opinion...
B
Obligation w/o trust = slavery. I won't pontificate on how that "relates" to this hobby. Maybe a way to freshen things up or an excuse to move on - if you "have" to tell her!
I would tell her that things have changed in your life and you won't be seeing her anymore. Providers, know that clients come and go and we are prepared when that happens. We don't own you, so do what makes YOU happy and don't worry about it. Now, go find that flame again, that's what you are paying for, aren't you?
Gee, it was my understanding that guys saw providers to avoid this kind of thing. Now I'm really confused.
-- Modified on 5/1/2005 5:36:49 PM
I'm sure "Player to be named later" is just trying to be a nice guy but this is even too nice for my tastes. Tell her the truth...tell her you're moving on.
NiceGuy
Now, be nice...and lead by example. 
And by the way, here's the world's smallest violin for all your posts below constantly referencing your topic, how you were right and your "ill-treatment" by other TERs.
I'm sure you'll make good use of it.
-- Modified on 5/2/2005 10:16:59 AM
I was merely pointing out what was a clear and obvious contradiction to thngs that were previously said on this board--a contradiction that I found amusing.
Notice that my post made no personal attacks on anyone--you're the one who chose to do that. Your idea of the definition of 'class' is apparently far different than mine.
The poster asked how to end a long-term professional relationship in a sensitive manner. It is not a contradiction, but simply one of those grey-areas that can be handled with ease in this business. Try ending a two-year civie relationship with similar success.
You took this so-called contradiction and ran with it as your Gort "civie is better than provider" point you have repeatedly used on this thread, the mistress thread (which appears to be pulled), the two Gort threads and of course your original posting which took a chat comment completely out of context.
Your attitude in chat particularly, but also on these boards, show a clear disrespect for providers and the gentlemen who would choose to visit them rather than, as you describe it: pick up as model-type civie chick uncomplicated, no-strings attached hot sex/dating. One example was your counter-point to Ciara's reasoned and objective arguments was to snidely suggest she posted for the sole purpose of advertisement: http://webtv.theeroticreview.com/msgBoard/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=136736&boardID=12&page=2.
Definition of class? Yes, I have no doubt we differ on that as well as our perception of escorts, civilians and women in general.
But you are right on one point: I should not have replied and given you, and this topic, yet more attention.
If she checks up on you on TER, how about starting a new alias?
I can't imagone wanting to stop seeing her. My problem is needing more cash to see her more often. If she cut her rate in half i'd see her twice as often.
If its boring you there's a good chance its boring the hell out of her also. Just tell her the thrill and fire is gone and you're looking to move on.
Sounds like you need to take a break for a while. Then start looking for a new provider with the right mindset. You might want to consider having more than 1 ATF at one time, cycle through them. Explain to each one that you have a very busy schedule as a result you can't see them every month or week.
Make one more date and show up unshaven and unshowered walking arround in your shorts with a beer in your hand . Let out a big burp ;or even better a big Fart and ask her for a BJ to start off with. Stopping will be her idea.. and she will never even know it.
Since that is the way I always am, in my case, it wouldn't be noticed.
Now that's class 
Variety, you miss it and thats, that. Since you have seen her for so long a simple "goodbye and thanks for the good times" should be enough.
You might be surprised to find out that shes just as bored as you are so your doing both of you a favor, who knows....
Although restraining order was the first thing that came to my mind When I read that she is checking on your activities and knows your alias.
Good luck..
-- Modified on 5/1/2005 7:47:32 PM
All good points and I had a laugh on the restraining order comment. God, I hope the man doesn't have to go that far.
Can't wait to meet you Presley. Any new piercings to speak of ?
NiceGuy
I also got a bit of a chuckle out of 1woody's suggestion but at the same time that could backfire in that she may mention that lack of hygene in future when ladies ask for references.
As far as checking up on you have you been listing her as a reference when seeing new providers? Or writing reviews?
Either way I would just honestly tell her you are ready for a change for now. You can either choose to leave it open that you may call her at some point in future or not that is your decision.
I cant answer that NiceGuyForYou Mama Zoe reads this and board and remember she said NO.. (Wink)
There is more going on than you just being bored. If you were bored and you see her every month, she would know it.
If two people see each other over 24 times, an emotional bond is formed. It is inevitable.
I would like to know the complete story, because if she doesn't know where you live, it is easy enough to not call her, block her number and email. She would get the message after a while that you didn't want to see her.
TET.
As a lady in this business once told me part of what you are paying for is not to have to answer that question "Why don't you see me anymore?" It sounds like you should just move on - No explanation required.
Tell it like it is. You pay for the p so as not to be bored with it.
She probably wont like giving up the easy income, but I bet she's bored too.
On to greener pastures!
This is a HOBBY... sound like you are the one who
has gotten attached... yeah, it happens, but I would
think, provider or civie, the truth is the way to go.
I'd appreciate his honesty.You are IN this hobby for variety and we gals all know that. We don't own you nor you us. That is why you hobby in the first place but in two years time a relationship does develop. Just give her a call and start sampling the fruits again. We expect you gents will do that. At least those of us who are professional do.
Good luck,
Anneke
Well said. Variety is the spice of life.
Don't contact her, wait until she contacts you. When she does, tell her she's terrific but it's time for me to see other women.
This also works in the civie world, as long as you've established from the get-go there are no long term expectations. This business, by definition, assumes that.
-- Modified on 5/2/2005 8:59:22 AM
Ask her if you can begin using some of your frequent flyer miles. Of course she may give you a ride for free for nostalgia, but I doubt if you get past not paying her fee more than once (ok twice, call me a optimist). When it comes done to it fellas, no matter how many feelings grow bewteen you, this hobby is about money moving from your pocket to hers. If she wanted to do you for free, it would have been obvious in the first couple of months. But the more evolved side of me says to tell her that you won't be seeing her any more as you have lost interest. Other than a bruised ego, she'll only be out your monthly donation.
-- Modified on 5/2/2005 10:11:27 AM
There's got to be a kinder way to phrase it than that.
Interesting to note how few women have responded here when the poster was requesting responses from women.
Is that because women are uncomfortable possibly hurting/impacting the business of another woman?
My first thought when I read this post was that the woman invovled has probably already figured out who the poster is. He mentions she reads the boards regularly. Well, my guess is there are not all that many women who fall into the situation described and that the provider probably has a sense of what he's thinking. So, you may have already done the job of letting her know.
In the end, we guys can be such wimps about these things! I'm not criticizing anyone else, just commenting on the nature of our half of the species. It's tough having those conversations with women!
I think Gort phrased it best, of course he was slammed for it, but one of the beauties of the hobby is not having to explain yourself. Let's face it 99% of the time it's a business, the other 1% is another issue. Let's not make this into something it's not, we're not talking about a couple breaking up, he owes her the same respect he would owe his dentist if he wanted to change dentists after two years. I know the service is as personal as a service can get,but if she is still charging him than it's still just that, a service.
I agree...it's just that simple. Either contact us or let us contact you and then state that you are interested in visiting with other providers. We understand it happens.
I'm surprised by how many advocate lying and sugar-coating the issue. That's a good way to cause unnecessary friction. Just be straight-forward, respectful, and courteous. Problem solved.
bored with you as well if there was nothing else other than sex especially if seeing you once a month is too frequent for her. I think providers are looking for variety too; they are not doing this for the money alone. If they can enjoy and make money at the same time, I bet they prefer to see a variety of men that they enjoy having company with. Perhaps seeing her much less frequent more solve the boredom problem.
-- Modified on 5/3/2005 11:02:45 PM
-- Modified on 5/3/2005 11:04:47 PM
-- Modified on 5/3/2005 11:08:25 PM