Just curious about experiences with White Listing on TER.  A bunch of questions for both the Ladies and the Gents.

Gents:  Do you ask for White Listing?  Do you ask during or after a date?  Have you ever been pleased by an unsolicited White Listing?  Displeased that you received a White Listing without your consent?

Ladies:  Do you ever give a White Listing if the Gent hasn't asked for one?  Would you prefer the topic be brought up during a date or afterwards?  Have you ever felt the need to decline giving a White List and if so, how do you do so politely (especially if you have given out other White Listings)?  

Thanks for sharing!

after a session with a lady that I've had a good time with shortly after the session. I appreciate them when given since they show, at least to me, that they find that I'm a person worth spending time with. The feeling is mutual.

and yes, I am pleased that someone would go ahead and list me anyways.  On one or two occasions a gal has forgone asking me for references based upon my whitelist references.

But it was for two reasons. First, I had NEVER had a session with the provider who WhiteListed me, and Second, I would never see a provider of her weight/age/looks, and really didn't want my name linked with hers in a sexual way. I may have no morals, but I do have standards. I have zero shame about fucking hookers, but never old, ugly or fat hookers. Not that she was ugly, but the other two........

To be honest, have never asked any of the ladies I've seen to white list me.  Never felt the need to either.  I'd rather know at the end of our time together if I can see her again and haven't been turned away yet.  I also know that if I provide them as a reference to someone new, they will all give me a stellar reference.  That works for me.

Both of my WLs were a nice surprise and I met both ladies more than once.

The following is an approximation of a real-life exchange that occurred a few years ago, when I was still White Listing clients.

HIM:  Hey, we've been seeing each other for a while, so I guess you like me!  Do you mind giving me a White List?

ME:  Hmmmm.  This is a bit awkward, but - honestly - I don't feel comfortable White Listing you because of your barebacking practices.  I know you've never pushed the issue with me!  But since I know that's your preference, I don't feel comfortable giving you an unqualified endorsement.  

HIM:  Okay. Thanks for your honesty.  What's your schedule for next week?

(I'm still seeing this gent, all these years later.)

i have never asked but I appreciated when they did and I told them so. I only have seen very few providers, so it's no big deal

I have P411 and send OK requests there.  Since I make most of my connections through that site I don't even think to ask about whitelisting.  Did get one unsolicited, though.

...I usually ask by e-mail or PM after I have seen them. I was pleasantly surprised when I discovered the one given without my asking. I've never received one from a provider I haven't seen.

I find them useful when being screened.

...not that they mean all that much. I think the okays I've gotten on P411 matter more and you do have to ask for those.  

esta chica es muy caliente ... me puede lista blanca cualquier momento.

The two that were unsolicited were from providers who know me very well, so I took their unsolicited white listing of me as a compliment.  I've asked a small number of other providers to white list me, just to have more than two, and they promptly did it.  I could probably have many more white lists if I'd asked for them, but I've read that some providers see too many white lists as a red flag.  (Just why that is, I have no idea.)

So overall I've had a good experience with white lists, but I have no idea how helpful they've been for providers screening me.

-- Modified on 3/7/2015 1:52:31 PM

I did have a couple of people PM me about her, asking me if a guy like me who is well known to prefer spinners enjoyed his time with a woman this far removed from my "type" Like you I had to be honest and inform them that I was clueless as to how she was BCD as I had never seen her.

...a session with her.  I got whitelisted by someone I never met or even heard of and who was 3,000 miles away from me.   She was fairly new so maybe it was a mistake but I asked her to remove it and she did.  It saved her the embarrassment of me having to tell guys who asked about her that I never saw her and don't know why she whitelisted me.

I have been blessed with several white listings. I have never asked anyone for one.

...whitelisted, especially after a first visit.  Since I don't trade reviews for whitelists, it makes screening easy.

END OF MESSAGE

If we've had a good time. I ask if they'd be comfortable White Listing me. Am OK if they don't but have found White Listings helpful. Sometimes I will write a nice review, if they say it would be helpful.

Looks like there is going to be a boys and girls line for fake "reviews" from now on. BooHoo

Of the three that I have, I only asked for one (the first), the others the ladies went out of there way to give, which I thought was nice of them.

and I will ask for P411 and/or Date-Check OKs. They help with securing future dates, but are relatively invisible and anonymous unless I share them with a provider I'd like to see.  

After the (now closed) thread from yesterday, I'd suggest that we consider Whitelists are something else entirely... they indicate a shared knowledge of each others' identities here on TER (and likely on P411/Date-Check/RS2K or other boards) - fewer secrets and greater disclosure. To me, they seem to be a more public affirmation that someone is a good guy - despite what may be a somewhat crass writing style or abrasive-seeming personality on the boards.  

I'll not ask for a whitelist, but will accept them as a complement if I receive them.  

Thanks for the compliments, Steph and Nikki.

When I leave I ask her if she had a good time with me would she mind white listing me. A lot of times they do. I find it helps in the verification process. I want to try to give out as little personal info as possible.

I never did anything else about it because whitelists are rather meaningless.
Just as meaningless as blacklists.

One did when asked after a meeting. A few I emailed didn't know how but were always willing to be a reference. So I just leave it at that

A lot of the ladies I see I tend to see multiple times.  Simce I generally hobby only once a month or so it makes for a small pool of ladies.  However, in the past year I have gotten 3 OK's on p411 (which I did ask for after the dates were done).  (A guy needs references after all.) As far as my one whitelist.  The provider asked me if I wanted it and I said sure, why not!  

Since a lot of providers say that Whitelists don't mean anything compared to P411 or other references I tend not to ask for them but do appreciate them if offered

If someone has white lists on their account, I use that as a reference directory. Because of this, I don't give whitelists automatically. If someone asks me for them, and they were a gentlemen that I would see again- I'm happy to give them one. And, to me, it's best to ask at the end of the date or in an email afterwards. Since, I only give them to gents I'd recommend, I don't know if I will want to recommend you until its over.