My little franky is admiring the ceiling.  It's like the gremlins staring at food at 12midnight.  

Sometimes I'm still half asleep,  I toss and turn,  slam that stiff thing right into my bed. Lay there for a few minutes on top and Ouch,  it starts getting painful.  

Girls what do you do when your guy has a morning hard on?  

(Aside from the occasional dick cheese, giving an unshowered BJ is always nice. Just a friendly advice. :

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As noted in the post below, I am not one to have a LTR or overnighters, LOL! but I usually have coffee in the morning with a side of porn. If he doesn't mind a wet pussy in his face upon waking up, I wouldn't mind taking advantage of a stiffy!

The last time I went down on a guy that was half asleep, he fell back asleep and farted in my face! I vowed NEVER to go down on someone asleep to get things started, they at least have to get out of the bed, use the restroom and come back, then it's all good!

what's known as a "piss harden."  Don't go down on one of those because the warm liquid shooting into your mouth ain't cream.
That said, my ex liked nothing better than to be awakened by my erect cock stroking her pussy.  Her motto then was "you could put it in."  So I "wood."

but by about 6:30 this morning I had already found the cure for my "morning wood" lying right next to me. Here is it about 7:30 AM local time, and I have already sent her on her way, and I am contemplating whether to hit the gym or waste my morning here on TER before the Argentina/Belgium game that starts in a couple of hours, and then the big game (for me that is) Costa Rica vs The Netherlands. I guess it's also a big game for admin, but to them this should be a cakewalk on their way to the semis, I doubt anyone truly believed that Costa Rica would make it anywhere near this far.

Oh well, no matter the outcome, a day that starts with getting laid at 6:30 and where tequila is involved by 10:00 AM can't be all bad, right?

Purra Vida Perras.

BTW I didn't have to worry about it being a "piss on" as I got up, brushed my teeth and took a piss first. I thought it was the least I could do for her. lol

I hate to share my bed with a passion,but getting wakened by the Bj alarm clock is one of the better ways to wake up  throw in a Starbucks on the nightstand and I'll probably marry her.

ex. Maybe you should be back with her? Whether you know it or not, subconsciously your words speak the truth. It's ok, my advice is free

New review I see LOL

'crowing' you do. That's if I can add correctly of course but it sure sounds close in your lifetime. Not something I'd be bragging about but hey, to each his own LOL. You are a 'guy' apparently and well, that's what guys do. Hell, that's why they have the 'Review #' right under your handle (not that you need any to get the clear picture)....so you can all be big macho men, the more you have, the better you are, right? Why? I have no idea hahahahahaha. Looks ridiculous on the outside if you ask me. Just sayin' GAGme. But I will say good morning and hope you had a Happy 4th. I'm sure you'll say you fucked 3 girls last night. Come on, hit me with it.  

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 6:26:55 AM

You really should announce yourself in case one of us isn't here to do it for you. The turdster is simply beside himself when his "pretty lady" goes MIA for a few days. He is convinced that one day you will leave him forever, but we all know better than that, don't we? lol

Is having a warm up session on a cold winter Sunday morning.

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But it's nice to know you continue to study me so carefully.  I do appreciate it.  And, no, there is no way the ex and I should be together.  Friends only, sorry to say.  But thanks so much for your free advice.  You know what they say about that.

go as I please No need to 'announce' myself nor need you to do it for me GAGme, I think my posts speak clearly for themselves. I think you would agree. Unlike the majority here, I'm NOT here to make friends or buddies like all you people. Now where would that get me? Seeing all the same gents like all the other girls see here? NO THANK YOU. Recycle, recycle, recycle. Tis good for the TER environment, wouldn't ya say?

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 6:43:17 AM

ok, our lil secret. Promise. Study you LOL? No, not really necessary and deff not all that hard Nick. You are transparent as the light of day. Even your fav posters on here could figure you out in a heartbeat my love, I am sorry to say.  

But no, what do they say about free advice?

but I am sure it's several times a thousand. If I were to guess I would say it's in the 3-4000 range, but who's counting. I don't review, and I drink like a fish. I can barely remember who I fucked yesterday, do you think I have a clue as to the exact number or women I have fuck in the forty one years that I have been sexually active? Do you have any clue what your "number' is in the forty years or so that you have been sexually active??? lol

and no, I did not fuck three girls last night. I only had two chicas yesterday, one all day and one all night, but who knows what today will bring?

Be sure to say hello to the turdster while you are here, he will be so jealous if you spend all your time talking to me and Nick. and would you please go fuck him already so we don't have to watch him constantly dry humping your leg, it's downright embarrassing to watch a supposed grown man acting this way.

Gently waking up because of some playfulness down there.  Like most guys, I have a morning woody anyway.  But when I get to look down and see a young lovely nurse administering mouth to dick while she's looking up at me with a devilish look on her face, my wood goes from balsa to oak.  A morning face sitting to get her fully ready to go is also very welcome.  Can't do much about my morning mouth breath, but other than that, I love wake-up sex.

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But, no, you just don't get it, of course. And what they say about free advice is it's worth what you pay for it.

Painful as it may be now I'd advise having that smegma trap of superfluous skin removed so as to be more attractive to your bed partner.  

I don't know, what do 'you' do is the question.........

Lemme guess, you just lay there like the rest'of'em waiting to be 'served'. Good god. Get a clue. It's on your body, figure it out.

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 7:28:35 AM

...just isn't the same. An out here, very few women make themselves available for 7 AM outcall.

And those that do either arrive half asleep, hungover, or are such gung-ho morning persons that are so cheerful and bubbly...and loud...that they kill the sensuality of the moment.

I need a younger housekeeper.

I miss my dog so much more than I miss the occasional Sunday morning day start. And even when I got it, it was as if she was giving me a treat to get me to do something for her. Yes, she was successful in manipulating me for a short period of time without me realizing it, but when I caught on it was turn out the lights cause the party's over. The hobby is so cool, you get to fuck and suck and you don't have to move furniture around the living room because she's tired with the couch, love seat, recliner position, or get roped into helping weed the garden.

So, I'll gladly give up the few Sunday morning lazy sex sessions for the "no nagging no bullshit".

sleepy, hungover, and bubbly ladies, there is always your hand, always eager to see you, you always know where it's been. and it keeps on going till you are done. Shit why even bother with those troublesome woman?

thank you for clarifying. I didn't know that LOL, really I didn't.  

And already you're suggesting they get circumcised? And, for those who were nipped as infants, do we have to go through it again just in case the first one wasn't valid?

I took a chica home with me last night, knowing full well I was too tired (and drunk) to really enjoy myself last night, but what I did know was when I woke up this morning she would be there in the bed with me to start my day off right, and sure enough she did.

Here it is, 10:00 AM local time. and I have already been laid once today, had breakfast. posted on TER, and am about to have my first tequila for the day in a few minutes. Damn, life is just so fucking good sometimes. Now if both Argentina and Costa Rica can win today, it will be a truly great day.

Pura Vida

whatever floats your boat. I guess I can't count well afterall. And an alcoholic on top of it? Woh, you got some issues don't ya LOL. Compensate much?

Me, yes, I know how many guys I've fucked in my 40 years and I can assure you it's less than my age. Is that a problem? It's a millithousandth compared to your 4000 at this point hahahaha LOL. And how old are you? GOOD GOD I actually think you are serious. You don't wanna know what I'm thinking, holy christ.  

You're new name is PIMPMasterG. Go ahead, I'll let you take it free of charge for your new handle. The ladies will have no problem finding you again I'm quite sure of it.

how in the hell do you have time for a 'relationship' or as many as you claim to have had, providers, civvies and every damn thing inbetween.  

Care to share? I'm dying to know how that happens actually.

Or are you trying to convert the number of fucks that GaG is claiming and that you only fuck men?

Seems that from your post a few threads down you're heading into dangerous territory fucking "boys".  As Pan commented when 24 y/o boys are fucking women close to twice their age...well, we do have Rod here.  

That's seems a tad weird  

Oh well...I guess people in glass houses...blah blah blah

And if you knew where my hand had been, you wouldn't want it near your private parts first thing in the morning any more than I do.

It's not really a comment on the women, it's just that the most sensual women in the world aren't really at their best after negotiating rush hour traffic for an early AM incall. I mean to get to my place even by 8:00, they'd have to wake up at 5:00, shower, dress, whatever they need to do, then get out the door by 6:30, put my address in Google Map, chart the course dodging all the roadwork and freeway backups, find the place to park, lug their work bag up to the door...I really can't expect a magic moment after all that.

So...think about it. Would you feel your best starting your day that way?

If I were in Costa Rica, that would be a more appealing option. Or if I'd had the foresight last night to estimate the value of planning ahead.

No, holidays sneak up on me. Instead, I just forget about sex and seek stimulating conversation at the coffeehouse. Not finding it, I unpack my iPod, and...here I am talking to you clowns.

I frequently see a guy at 6 am and as I am an early riser and hit the ground running, I don't have an issue.

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Having a willing partner PERIOD really helps..

I'm still dreaming about shit at 6:00.  Then I need a couple of hours to get my ass in gear.

But if you wanted to come over at 6:00 feel free to water the plants and flowers outside, take a nice walk or just catch up on your emails and such.

Early morning is just not for me...sorry  

Because its worth it.

I promise he'll show up and not cancel due to his very busy work schedule! He'll set the date and send you a deposit!

He'll respect you, swoon over you, lay flat on you, flip you like a pizza because he works out and can lift 400 lbs. He'll bring you a gift which by the way doesn't make him a mangina but he'll act like a love struck puppy which does.

Also please teach him how to do sexy dirty talk, he hasn't a clue. And PLEASE let him know you calling him your little mangina isn't sexy dirty talk.

Also please help him understand starting threads on the DC regional board about manginas and is it really a bad thing, just makes people here go nuts on him.

And lastly he needs a BFF and a bromance so try to get scoed to give him the time of day.

Thank you in advance for making a Taylor intervention.

CGS

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Big difference in my book. They're barely out of highschool. Let's see 20 yo difference, 40 yo difference...BIG DIFFERENCE LOL.  

OTOH, never fucked a woman. Not sure I'll ever go there, maybe, maybe not. Have come close a few times. I'm afraid if I try it I may never go back.  

I'm holding out ya see.

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 9:30:26 AM

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works today. Funny how that happens when I pop in to say hello. Thank you I am flattered. The sharks have been circling for quite a while I see.  

As far as Mr. Tidwell, he seems to be doing fine all by himself. I highly doubt he and I will meet at anytime in the future nor will he need an intervention by me. But thanks for the thought.  

Do take care CGS.

she knows everything about everything.  Just ask her.  Look what she's done for Rod.  He's so much more mature and cool now, lol!  Even scoed had given up on him, but Taylor turned the trick....so to speak.

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The first of which is why are you always is such a lousy mood, and why I am always happy? You really should try getting laid a bit more often, it wouldn't cure the BSC's, but it might make you a happier person

and you really need to get a bit better acquainted with the English language, how does fucking a lot, and with a lot of partners somehow make me a "pimpmaster"?

I would also respectfully suggest you find a new line of work. If you are a hooker who has only fucked less than 30 guys in her life, presumably some of them for free, you must be eligible for food stamps, once again that would explain your foul moods. lol Even LR got laid more often than you seem to,  and she spent most of her time talking shit here on TER. Speaking of LR, i kind of miss her, she was proof that a woman can come on her, post her mind and not be a BSC hooker. You OTOH........

Girls don't play on this board to fucking cheerful, I got news for you Brut. If you were in our shoes conversing (or 'try' to converse is more apropos) with you all, perhaps you'd understand a bit more. We may not be all cups of sunshine (on here at least), but it sure is fun. Heehaw

Some 60+ dudes like the U21 gals...many others don't.

Not judging here...simply stating the obvious.

BTW...you won't be considered a lesbian if you tried a woman.  Homosexuality doesn't work that way.  Don't you recall all the threads on some small minded posters thinking if a guy get's anal (or prostate play) from a hooker he's gay.  

No shortage of stupid posters here.

Just curious...what in the fuck would you chat about with some mid 20's kid?  I would be fine if he's simply curious and wants to be there an hour and leave...but you have often claimed that it's an experience...one that should entail multi-hours.  Yeah...I would find that a bit off-putting.

smirk on my face as I type, type away hahaha. But you never will. But I will say this and you should respect this at least if nothing else, while I could get laid more, I choose not to as a being a 'dedicated' and 'devoted' woman to the gentlemen of this world. As long as I'm here, that's about all the fun I get when I can. As of late, it's been a bit crazy. I had to postpone my date with Mr.YoungGun that was supposed to happen tomorrow until next weekend because of it. And right before I jump on yet another plane to venture off again. That's just how it is.

Y'all know I'm one who can't mix business with pleasure. Far too weird for me personally, I could never do that to someone I was with. But rest assured, I am almost ready to venture into 'civvie' land again and if I am fortunate enough to find a stud to knock my socks off (I am kinda picky, ok VERY picky LOL) I intend to fuck his brains out every evening...MY way LOL. That you can be sure of. And when I do, I'll come back and post all happy...deal?

PS, I am quite a fun lil chica to hang with, not that any of you will ever get the chance to ever know hahahaha. That's what's hilarious to me. You can keep labelling me a drunk, med-taking, crazy old lady and I'll keep laughing my way to the .......................that's quite alright by me.

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 1:41:42 PM

the young guns I have met act much more mature than the guys I am 'supposed' to be dating. If you met me, I guarantee you'd see I am a very different '40' yo woman than most LOL. I really do just click with younger guys naturally. Call it nature's weird phenomenon. Me and older guys just don't work, but I did try in this world for the first time in my life. So be proud of me Papa for at least trying. I live a very young kind of lifestyle and relate to the younger generations, I don't know why. I do get bored very very quickly lol.

The majority of generations who 'check' me out on average I'd say are the 20 yo's and the 60 yo's, more than the 40 or 50yo's but they look the same as 60yo's to me (sorry guys). That's just how it is and how it's been. So Papa, do I bring someone home my father's age to meet my Dad someday, who I look like this guy's daughter too, or someone 20 years younger who acts older, with the energy, the bod, mindset and lifestyle that matches me...you figure it out. Younger guys are natural for me, but then again, I am a very rare and unique woman  

Ps....usually the 20yo's know what to do in bed too and aren't afraid to try anything you want them to. The 'programming' issue isn't there yet from years and years before. Young guys are GAME for anything new and keep it fun and light and they go after it. They don't stand there like a deer in headlights like Mommy hold my hand (some older guys). Oh, and they are EXCELLENT listeners. It's really a great time in this world and out. I'm pretty sure the guy I 'end' up with next as an SO will be around 33 tops.  

Old guys=Game, Set, Match. Done.  

-- Modified on 7/5/2014 2:04:31 PM

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The first time Taylor has admitted she doesn't know everything.  Perhaps there's hope for her and Turdy.

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I'm definitely a SPECILIST!!! In many many many categories!!! JUST CALL ME DOCTOR GEMMA  !!!!