Two quiestions:
1. Should the hobbiest ask if he may review the provider he just met with?
If yes, that seems to defeat the purpose of the review process.
2. If a provider has used the hobbiest's TER handle for screening him, should she not assume he would review her?
"1. Should the hobbiest ask if he may review the provider he just met with? If yes, that seems to defeat the purpose of the review process."
I think it's a very polite thing to do. Some ladies are more discreet and/or trying to be low-key than others. The reviews might not be wanted for a variety of personal reasons, and as long as it would otherwise be a *good* review, it is nice to respect a ladies wishes. If it would be a negative review, or of a ROB, bait and switch, etc... well, who gives a damned what her wishes are if she's not a lady?
How would that defeat the purpose of the review process if the session is already over? It's not like he will receive better retroactive services lol!
"2. If a provider has used the hobbiest's TER handle for screening him, should she not assume he would review her?"
No. Many gentlemen do not review at all, or only randomly review.
-- Modified on 2/3/2008 8:00:12 PM
1. He meant "just met" not "after he met". Meaning asking her before she ravishes him.
The answer is no. Don't ask before. If it was a great time go ahead and ask afterwards. If it was a horrible time, then write one at your own personal discretion (but most of us would appreciate it).
2. I agree, it isn't a given that a member of TER will write a review for every single lady he meets. But don't let the ladies know that, keep it hush hush. 
b-
SolaLove,
Thanks for your response, insight and suggestion. I would like to clarify my thinking a little further.
The provider I'm speaking of has an average of 2.5 reviews over the past 7 to 8 months. With this many reviews, I'm wondering if all these men asked for permission, and were given it, or just reviewed without asking. I've placed 7 reviews in the last 3 or for months, so she could reasonably expect that I would review, especially given the incentives regarding TER membership. Regarding the negative verses positive reviews, I've read that many guys base their decision to see someone based more on reviews than on the providers ads.
You don't know current circumstances. Always ask never assume.
No, a hobbyist has no obligation to ask a provider whether she prefers to be reviewed or not. Asking prior to the session would defeat the review process as an otherwise ho hum provider might rise to the occasion knowing you were going to review her (in which case I wouldn't review her). If a lady asks not to be reviewed and she has provided a good or superior session, than one should respect her request. If she sucked (in a bad way) then you owe it to the rest of us to do the review.
I wouldn't give out a TER handle to a provider if at all possible and if I did, I probably wouldn't do a review.
Some ladies are UTR for a reason. You may have the best intentions when you post her awesome review, but if one of her coworkers in her "day job" find that review, it could spell the end of her career.
There are plenty of reasons for asking first. Most of all, it will show you are thoughtful, causing her to like you even more than she already does.
The purpose of reviews is to give an honest assessment of the experience that a provider has afforded her clients in the past. Assuming that most/many bad providers know they suck and would therefore say no, why ask.
If you've had a great time, it would not be inappropriate to explain that to the provider and ask if she minded if you would post a review.
I always ask and let them see my review first. Its there life and respect there privacy if they want. Its the only right thing to do
Why don't you just ask her to write it up and e-mail it to you...
I also ask after the session, and also let them read and to check for any inaccuracy, or if they dont want something revealed that I dont realize I am not supposed to reveal (see Redbeard's response below for example). I have so far -I know limited, had no edits at all.
I usually write a little "thank you" to a lady after I get back home, and include asking whether she prefers that we write reviews or not. Some ladies just prefer that you don't, so I will respect their wishes. If it wasn't a good session, then I'm not going to write a "thank you" anyway, and she will probably get a poor review.
if you want to review to receive the benefits of reviewing or you feel that there is a significant reason for your review (different or sub-standard service) then you should write a review.
If the lady prefers that you not review and that is her policy, then you should respect it unless there is a very strong reason not to...ie: ROB, bad session, change in services offered.
If you use your TER handle for screening and you have reivews, I think a lady should assume you will reivew her and if she doesn't want a review it is her responsibility to ask you not to review, not your responsibility to ask her.
I have had great ladies ask not to be reviewed and I have had horrible ladies ask for a review, and I have never gone against a lady's wishes.
You have to find your own way and you should do what is comfortable for you.
Best Of Luck
If the session is bad, or significantly different from other reviews I've read, I don't ask, I just write it. My "responsibility" is to my fellow hobbyists, not to the provider.
If I like her and have a good time, I almost always mention the review process and ask if she wants a review. I don't think it defeats the purpose - if she already has a lot of good reviews, one more isn't going to change anything, and if she wants to reamin UTR and is essentially refusing a good review, I will respect her wishes.
As far as your second question, it does seem logical that she would anticipate being reviewed, but if it matters to you, you should ask. You know what happens when you ass ume.
At the end of a session (assuming it went reasonable well), I ask the lady if she would like to be reviewed, and which sites she would like to be reviewed on.
I write a different review per site, then email them to the lady to ensure that I did not reveal anything that I shouldn't. In one case I had remarked on a slight variation in the two call system. What I didn't know is that this variation was only at one apartment building within a 20 mile radius. In short, I unknowingly gave away her incall location. That was quickly fixed and no damage done.
I have only had one other edit, and in that case the lady asked me to exclude a menu item, as it was not normally available. Again, not problem.
It is simply a matter of respect.
with hungry1951. It would be very tactful to shoot a nice e-mail AFTER and ask at that point. It is polite and it reminds the lady to ask in return if she may whitelist him. I am assuming this would be only if it was an enjoyable visit.
They are an information source for hobbyists. No more no less. If you feel that you had an experience that differs from her other reviews, or reviews are scarce or outdated then IMO you should write a review.
If you feel that your review would not contribute new or useful information then skipping a review is no big deal.
The provider's wishes in this matter are not material.
-J
they HAVE become marketing tools. I understand that technically, you use these reviews to see if you will get off, whether you'll be able to do these things your wife won't do/ get off in a certain manner, but by placing a premium on the ladies who have these great reviews, they become a marketing tool. The well reviewed ladies raise their rates in some cases due to this, they put it on their sites, they post and you come a runnin'. So really these reviews are marketing tools... ESPECIALLY when there is a body of hobbyists out there who write emails/ make offers over the phone of good reviews for freebies or discounts. These gents will prey on a provider's dependency upon that marketing tool. I imagine they do so because in some cases it works, though not with me.
I suppose it may be the nature of the business, but the reviews work both ways these days for the ladies who are dependent upon them.
This is not to say that we SHOULD have a voice in the review, but I have heard a few times that in cases where guys gave ladies lower scores, these ladies won't provide references or see the gent again. I think that as a result, some men have adapted and thinking they had a nice time, will provide an email of the forthcoming review in order to ensure that this nice time will continue.
Just my .02
Katie
I always ask a guy's ter handle. Reading his reviews helps me to get a handle on his personality, likes, dislikes, what have you... In fact, once I used it as a reason not to see a guy. He had written this horribly anal and rude review of a girl saying some mean things about her in the name of "letting people know." I thought why would I want to see someone so rude?
Personally, I'm of the school that if you review me, cool. If not, no prob. I'm not desperate to set any records (low volume, remember) and it's fine if he wants to review to get his vip, but I figure I've got enough that you guys know I'm not some psycho chick with a pimp waiting in the car.
If you had a nice time and want to rehash it, submit a review. I've had guys send me copies of the reviews they sent in and that was cool, but at the same time, I kinda' thought well hell, why show it to me when I'll see it anyways? Unless you've said some messed up and untrue things, it's not going to preclude me from seeing you again. (Note: messed up things would include anything truly disrespectful and degrading.)
Katie
What percent of guys ask your permission to do a review vs. those who do not?
But if you want to write one should we meet,go ahead. No prob. I'm not opposed to it. I just don't live and die by my reviews.
Katie