For some reason this morning a line popped into my head a provider  once used on me.  Thought I's share it with the group.

I had scheduled an hour session, she arrived on time and left 4 hours later.  During that period, she came over and over.  While she was riding cowgirl, I asked her if she had ever had that many O's.  Her reply was comical and I'll never forget it.

"Yes, but not in one night!"

shivers.  It was so bold and so suddenly loud.  Good old fashioned enthusiasm.  (I was rimming her. But that's none of your business.)

(her on top) and I obviously hit the right buttons because she completely stopped what she was doing, arched her back, went rigid, and started hyperventilating. A few moments later I said to her "if there's anything I can do for you, anything at all..." she cut me off, looked over her shoulder, gasped (and I _do_ mean gasped) "you.....you.....you....did it", then collapsed and passed out for about 3 seconds.

Brings a smile to my face to this day.

The best line(s) are:

(1) Oh, you're so big down there that I cannot accomodate you.
(2) I thought that we had something special developing between us.
(3) I tell everyone about my special friend, and last, but not least,
(4) Here you go again, expecting something more from our relationship. I've given you every f****** moment of time you have paid for!

It has been a few months since I heard these, but the post made me think of them.

Mine was:

"Grrrrrr. I knew this was gonna be good..(pant)"

I was at a strip club in eastern Wisconsin when the dancer I had been talking to all night broke the heel of her shoe. She came back and sat down next to me and I started massaging her foot while she tried to fix her shoe.

After a few minutes of foot massage, she announced that I was going home with her. When we got to her hotel room later that evening, I continued the foot massage, and then turned it into a full body massage (because her body was so excellent, I wanted to touch every part of it.)

She started getting sleepy after a half hour or so, so I switched to DATY to wake her back up, prompting her to say "Is this a date or what?"

"I'll pay money to the woman who taught you how to do that!"

For months I had been trying to get her to come. She had always been a soft moaner. I had tried every DATY trick in the book.  I had asked her repeatedly what she wanted me to do. Maybe she knew, maybe she just didn't want anyone to know, but she wouldn't tell me.

Finally, with the flat of my tongue, I licked her old man in the boat extremely hard, while massaging her washboard in a circular motion. Eureka!

She tried to squirm away, her legs started to shake uncontrollably,  but the bedstead and my two armed grip on her hips wouldn't let her get far. She started to scream out loudly.

"Don't......  

STOP!"

"Don't....stop!"

"Don't stop!..... ARRRRRGGHHH!"

She changed after that. She calls me now.


BOT


-- Modified on 7/11/2004 8:26:18 PM

Not tonight honey I have a headach.

Oh wait you said best not worst.

Thank You

One lady was performing bbbj and was skillfully incorporated fondling of the "boys" into her repetoire when she stopped and just started staring at them.  She looked intrigued and I thought the worst, that maybe she spotted something on them she didn't like.  She didn't say a word, but she continued to look me over down below, now I'm thinking I've got a dingleberry going, or god forbid a wart or something, I'm such a pessimist!

She ponders some more, and then says in a serious tone "you have the most beautiful balls I've ever seen". She then gave me a introspective narrative of the beatuy that are my gonads, much like an artist would do when they critique a piece of art.

I'm thinking to myself.......balls are droopy, saggy, wrinkly, ugly things, they have no business being used in the same sentence as "beautiful". She's seen a whole lot more sets of balls than I have so I will take it as a compliment



She wasn't the first, nor the last, lady to make a casual comment about them, but I'll never forget hers!

Haven't ACTUALLY heard it but...

I so vividly imagined hearing Emma saying "WTF!!! Is that a dog on page 7!" last week that I had to wipe diet coke off my monitor.

Not necessarily the best line but the funniest.

Provider arrives at my residence, starts to look around, and asks if my wife is home to which I reply, "Of course, but I gave her a sedative so we probably won't wake her.

She said "What me pay you?"

Hard to understand without knowing the background that led to the moment.  Let's just say that is was somewhat removed from the normal "date" scenario.

However, to the beautiful lady who said this to me, I will never forget that moment...

"That's a big dick.  Go easy on me."

My ATF while in CG: "I'm just about there! Please wait for me!" and, later in the session, "Oh, you're going so DEEP!"

Yes, boys, it was a fun time....

flopster.

Me have small hands, make your dick look big.

mouth"

-When I asked her if she ever got turned on giving BJs.

In the heat of the moment when I shouted "whose your daddy?!".... she screamed instinctively without missing a beat. it was so funny and intense that we broke off and laughed our hearts out.

Another time, many moons ago when I was young, foolish and gorgeous (my my late teens). I was seeing an older (late twenties) vixen who after a steamy session looked at me and in a sultry voice said…” you’r coming back again for free”....damn did a score...

I always thought that was just a joke to make fun of the guys who think they are super macho.

Instead of "whose your daddy?", why not just yell "I'm a jerk"?

One girl I saw said you are really much better looking than I was expecting, she became very nervous and threw up all over herself. poor thing.