I know I only started escorting like 2 months ago but
I'm thinking of taking a break from escorting.  

The guys I've seen thus far have been really great and complimentary of me and that really boosted my self esteem when I first started this. But I feel the body image issues creeping back up and I kinda want to focus on losing weight.

I've gained like 40 pounds since I've taken the pictures on my website (earlier this year) and I feel uncomfortable taking pictures at this size and posting them all over the internet.

I might see a few returning gentleman that I've seen already, Oh and if there are men who are just looking for an obese escort I wouldn't mind seeing them. lol

The only problem is I have some people who have already signed up for my Nude Picture Service and I've been procrastinating about putting the nude pictures up cause I looked at them and I just don't like my fat body.


I just want to focus on using my new treadmill and getting my fat ass in shape so I can feel and look like a sex symbol.


Someone suggested that I do the FUCK IT DIET by margaret cho: http://www.margaretcho.com/blog/fuckitdiet.htm


-- Modified on 12/11/2003 3:59:13 PM

Vicki

Babygirl, when you start loving yourself from within, then others will love you for who you are, no matter what you look like If you want to lose weight, make sure it is for all the right reasons (for yourself, healthwise, which I know I will be joining a gym soon, myself), not for wrong reasons (like for a new client who only likes them thin or a guy who wants you to be that way, for you will never please them, no matter what you do). Honestly, I think that you are a very attractive, beautiful, smart lady, who has an opinion about various topics on the board. Many men have expressed a desire to see you, the way you are now (SMILE!) Those compliments alone, should tell you that you are indeed beautiful person No matter what you should decide, you know that you are always able to call me, and I will continue to give you much support, no matter what you decide to do Hey, we can even join a gym together (since we are not that far apart), but no matter if you lose weight or not: you will always remain beautiful in god's eyes, and to others around you

Your friend,

Mel

-- Modified on 12/11/2003 5:29:33 PM

I've been substituting AdvantEdge Nutrition Crisp bars for my breakfast and lunch.  In 6 months I've lost 35 pounds.  Slimfast didn't work for me.  Atkins made me feel sick.  This is the first thing I tried that worked.  And they ACTUALLY taste good, not like that stale fudge candle wax flavor most of the energy bars seem to have.  Go for the Oatmeal Raisin and the Rocky Road if you are a Chocoholic.  They have 210 calories and fill me up for 5 hours and no hunger pains.  I then eat a normal dinner.  No excessive exercise either (although I will probably have to start as I hit that plateau that inevitably comes).  This is from the Body for Life people BTW.

That takes care of the physical side of things.  Don't beat yourself mentally either.  Genetics play a big part, and can make it hard but not impossible.  Your image of self worth does NOT come from what you see in the mirror, only what you feel in your soul.  If you are self conscious pour extra effort into rocking his world.  I guarantee he won't be comparing you to Halle Berry when you are sending his brain into overload.  And look at it this way, YOU get PAID well to do something WE hobbyists all gladly pay to do.  Beats the hell out of running a cashier at Walmart or any of the other soul sucking jobs out there!

and we're here for you.

There are plenty of people on here who've been successful at weight loss and those going through special programs now.

One thing that helps me (even though not always weight related) is thinking "will this help me, or hurt me in achieving my goal"; and "is this one minute of pleasure worth the several days of self-incrimination??".

You can also train the brain to think differently, so every time you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror - tell yourself something very powerfully encouraging such as: "You're beautiful!"; "you're gonna DO IT!"; "nothing can stop you, girl!" etc.

Can't wait to hear your progress..

"Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon,
must inevitably come to pass."
                                       ~ Paul J. Meyer




-- Modified on 12/11/2003 7:25:45 PM

I don't know you, but I can tell you this. You weight is the least important part of YOU. How you feel about yourself is whats important. Granted 40 lbs in two months raises a question that only you know the answer too.

Vicki, you are absolutely beautiful!  More importantly you seem like a sweet, caring and intelligent lady.  Please don't let your self esteem rest on your perceived physical imperfections.

However, if your weight is a health issue, then please do try to change that.  Don't go on a 'diet' though.  Diets may help you lose weight, but they don't teach you how to eat once you go off.  What you need is a healthy lifestyle makeover.  Essentially you need to adopt an eating and excercise pattern which you can and will maintain for the rest of your life.  The focus is having energy, self esteem and as close to optimal health as possible.  The icing on the cake is that you will lose weight and become leaner and stronger.

As for escorting, if it is something you enjoy doing continue on.  You should never stop living the life you want just because you don't feel perfect enough.  Men are all attracted to different body types, and many are attracted to people predominantly on their personality.  Please never define yourself or your worth by the number on the scale.  You are so much more than that!

I know this isn't an exercise/diet board, so I won't give any nutritional advice on here.  But my 'real' job is as a lifestyle coach and nutritionist, so PM me if you would like any help on setting up a healthy eating program.  I'd be happy to help out if I can.

Have a happy and safe holiday season!

I think you are very attractive woman and you have one of the most charming websites that I have seen. I love the family and friends photos, you seem so down to earth.  IMHO Melinda is right, you have to lose weight for the right reasons, health reasons being the most important.  I am just sorry that I will most likely never travel to Boston and never get a chance to meet you (or Melinda).

Hi Vickinboston,

You have to know........it's all about the person you are! I know, because I am a very shy guy.

What I have learn in the past 48 yrs is..........It's all about the person. It dosn't matter about looks, money, and ect!

It's matters about who you are! If your a nice and special person......It will work out!

Just me,
1dogg12

PS I think your a very nice lady from your post. What you wish for you...........you do whatever is best for you and not worry about what others think!

-- Modified on 12/12/2003 3:23:03 AM

-- Modified on 12/12/2003 3:48:38 AM

Vicki -

Your post actually wants to make me see you more than I had in the past.  Your truthfulness is something that is appreciated.  I have not yet Melinda but there is not a local boston provider that I want to see more and that is due in large part to her personality and her honesty.  There is no substitute for that when dealing with providers.  I love thin busty providers and I love busty BBW's...the differentiating factor among providers for me is their personality!  You seem to have a great one.  Whatever you decide, I hope to make your acquaintance at some time in the not too distant future.

Umm I think you misread what I wrote, I did not gain 40 lbs in two months. I took my pictures in February of this year so I've gained 40 pounds in about 9 months I'd say.
Just thought I'd clear that up.
lol

I think the most important aspect is to be comfortable with yourself. If you feel the need within you to be a certain way, then do it! Whether you're 220 or 120...the most important thing to remember is if you feel good about yourself and believe in yourself that confidence is seen by others too.

i definintely think you are right and I think that is what my problem is, I'm not use to being this big and I'm uncomofrtable in my skin.

i look forward to meeting you as well hon