TER General Board

Tolerance "101"sad_smile
FreedomRider225 3442 reads
posted

I recently re-loaded Yahoo-IM and all the bells and whistles are now working again. A sound alerted me that someone on the "buddy" list(that I hadn't used in a year)was on line. It ended up being a woman from a "dating" site that tried to contact me long ago but I shrugged off as "not my type". Just for fun I decided to start a cyber conversation with her. She is a school principal living in Laguna Beach California. She questioned how much Dating I had done and I replied that I disliked the civilian dating scene and preferred to hobby. She was totally innocent of the terminology and started to question more. After about 15 minutes of her trying to figure out what kind of dating "hobbying" was I finally layed it on the line.  She replied with:

" I don't know if you are the the type person I wish to talk to"

I replied that how can she a educator, versed in the teachings of modern tolerance and in a city with a large Gay population be so INtolerant of MY life style. I then asked her why the Gays are embraced by society and protected by LE but heterosexual people like myself hated and hunted?. Naturally she had no answer and all her leftist liberal education and teachings proved a hypocritical sham.

   So much for tolerance training in our learning institutions.

   FR.    

Why do you frame the discussion as if it had anything to do with her political and philosphical orientations?

She could have easily responded that way based upon a very right leaning and fundamentalist viewpoint. You make so many assumptions based upon so very little information. Based upon the rate of exchange possible for yahoo IM, it seems very unlikely that you knew any more about her then she did of you.

Just from reading your post in the way you describe it, your idea of fun was to pick a fight and shock this woman from the start which is exactly what you did. The only part that is one incredible leap of faith in my opinion is the presumption that as evidenced by this very brief exchange, you can now sleep at night knowing the liberal agenda is one of hypocrisy. I know many conservatives, neocons and libertarians that would respond in the same way. The idea of hobbying is not mainstream and the opinions thereof run much deeper then the flaws in any particular orientation. Just my opinion....but tolerance runs both ways and includes not assuming someone else's sensibilities will be similar to yours, even if they appear prudish or antiquated. It's all about acceptance from all sides, isn't it? Seems like plenty of judgement to go around from both ends to me....but as I said several times, just my opinion.

-- Modified on 2/16/2004 9:24:19 PM

-- Modified on 2/16/2004 9:25:29 PM

Yo!  I didn't look for a fight with this lady She was coming at me with that "I want to know everything about you...NOW". I wasn't looking to shock her I am just brutally honest at times. I have no SO so I don't have to hide my hobbying regularly from anyone. I don't look at the hobby as shamefull so I don't treat it as a dirty secret. I just thought it was odd that someone like her so steeped in political correctness and "tolerance" for alternate life styles, religion etc etc should be so quick to pass negative judgement on another human beings chosen life style.
  BTW- Sorry if I upset You with my pointing to "left wing - liberal" values but that IS where the climate of current education stems from.

  Liberal, conservative, fundamentalist whatever! Coming from the "culturally sensitive" educational system that she does she showed great hypocracy.
 
   FR.  


Nadia_Imani4174 reads

I think the woman reacted in the way any woman outside of the industry would.

Only people within the industry or very closely linked to it, tend to really understand it.   Everybody else looks upon prostitution as dirty and something people do as a last resort.  

I can't imagine that changing in my life time.

Nadia_Imani3250 reads

I think some people are in danger of posting away on these message boards, they make friends with people in the industry and their whole lives get entwined.  Then, when they find themselves in the real world, it shocks them that this hobby isn't accepted by the average man on the street.

Keep your feet on the ground, and realise that this isn't the norm.  It may be OUR norm.

"I replied that how can she a educator, versed in the teachings of modern tolerance and in a city with a large Gay population be so INtolerant of MY life style. I then asked her why the Gays are embraced by society and protected by LE but heterosexual people like myself hated and hunted?. Naturally she had no answer and all her leftist liberal education and teachings proved a hypocritical sham."


Well for starters, you're committing a crime when you engage in the "hobby". Beyond that, your comparison to the situation that Gay people are in isn't valid, and does nothing to make your point. Additionally she probably figured you for a kook, criminal or psychopath.

I'm also curious how you divined that this lady, who you admittedly blew off over a year ago, and spent a few scant minutes in IM with, is a product of "leftist" liberal education? Because she didn't give you the answer you wanted to hear?

Isn't this post of yours mostly about making some political point? I mean come on, you're a grown man, you talk to some lady in an IM(a school principal for Christ's sake), tell her you frequent prostitutes, and then act incredulous when she tells you that you aren't the kind of person she wants to get to know. No one wants to see "escorting" decriminalized more than I do, but get real already. MFSD>>>>

Gee'z  Sorry to raise such Ire. Consider me "Flamed".
   I only brought up the Gay issue because just a few decades back it was a "crime" to be gay, and now as pointed out they are a protected class. As for the comment about the "leftist liberal" climate in education. If the current educational system didn't bend that way there would be NO mention of tolerance for alternate life styles, alternate family structures etc in our schools.
   My Ex is a educator. She has had to take many classes/lectures concerning tolerance and sensitivity of common contemporary life styles. I guess being reminded that ours is still not on their list kinda stuck in my craw.  

   My apologies if I offended anyone

   FR.


-- Modified on 2/17/2004 8:23:53 AM

dude- we all love you- fear not-

It's just that this interaction was a little one sided.  I think the fight club analogy is a good one.  The less said about one's hobby activities to civvies the better.  They just don't understand...

I have only one question:

In what way are you "hated and hunted"?

If you think it's so wonderful from the other (gay) side then by all means act gay and see what treatment it gets you at your job, in public and anywhere else you interact with other people. I don't think people are closeting their heterosexuality in fear of reprisal the way some gay people have been forced to cope. Again just my opinion....

F Rider didn't mean things as strongly as they came out, and everyone on here has made good points.  

However, just an extra kudo to mistershow.  He is totally correct in what he is saying about gays being persecuted.  TV may portray one thing, and you may have "successful" gays being outspoken, but that is in no way, shape or form the norm.  Most gays still hide their sexual preference at work and even from many of their friends.  I know this, as one of my best friends is the national sales manager for an established comany in SAN FRANCISCO, and he STILL is in the closet at work because the owners of the company are strongly religious.  That also says nothing about gays getting beaten up walking down the street just becaus ethey are holding hands, and if you think that doesn't still happen in places like San Diego, call the Gay & Lesbian Center, or the Lambda Defense Fund and check.  And that is San Diego...let's not even talk about Omaha, or Raleigh, or Houston.

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