The woman might insist on hearing the juicy details of his sexual excursions while away, and as he basically tells her dirty stories she's free to react however she wants. She might get angry, jealous, or she might masterbate, or she might demand sex, or all three in sequence. If a woman asked something like, "And this Irma, did you love her?" And if you assert that at this point you would go limp, does that mean you would fall out and abandon the improvisation? What if another was couple was watching the scene, or participating in the fantasy in other rolls? You would ruin it for them to? Just because that nasty L word" makes you go limp?
In a fantasy where a bride to be is undressed by the groom-to-be's boss and the seamstress fitting her wedding gown, the word might pop up in all sorts of ways, before during and after the threesome.
And I really don't think it's any different in vanilla fucking. That too is fantasy.
Even the laity act out fantasies. Everything from going steady to fending off jealous lovers to marriage itself is, in reality, nothing more than fantasies born out of the lives unhappy people who try to live their illusions. They might not call it fantasy, may not openly want to admit it, because that would tarnish the gloss.
You really seem to have some naive ideas as to what is real and what isn't.
Whoring is an escape from reality. Thrillseeking, drinking, gambling, drugs, overeating, all are escapes in the same way. Maybe everything is an escape except reality, which is unendurable.
