In my experience most of the tropes or clichés about Providers are actually true, especially the positive ones.
Not every Provider all the time, but more often than not, I have found the following to be true... Heart of Gold? YEP; Gorgeous & Kind? YEP; and what I want to talk about today... Wife Friendly? YEP. Speaking of Wife Friendly...
Another brother asked me this question a while back and I wanted to share my response.
QUESTION:
If I can trust what you say about yourself, you have been married to your first & only wife for several decades and she does not know you are a Hobbyist. I have also read your reviews and know many of the women you have seen. So, I have to ask, don’t you find yourself irritated or impatient with your wife after having spent an afternoon with what you describe in your reviews as a Unicorn-Class Ferrari?
Because when I've been with a Provider who knocks my socks off, like one of our shared UCFs, I find myself thinking “Why doesn't my wife do some of the things I love? Even if it is just a decent blowjob?” And then I get really frustrated at her. Are you able to keep the negative vibes under control? If so, HOW?
ANSWER:
First, I completely understand where you are coming from. Second, I don't really know how to answer the question without sounding presumptive or cheesy; but since you were willing to ask, I ought to be willing to just lay it out there. So, forgive me if I sound presumptive or cheesy, but here’s my story...
Yes, I am still married to my first wife; we have been married for 35 years, I love her more than anything, she is my best friend and she does not know about the Hobby; or she would set me on fire while I slept! and YES, I am able to keep the agitation, frustration and negative vibes towards my wife under control.
HOW? I’m not exactly sure, but here is what I could come up with...
TEN STEPS TO ALLOWING THE HOBBY TO BE WIFE FRIENDLY:
My wife and I do not have a perfect marriage. Obviously I have my issues; anyone who says he loves his wife more than anything and has slept with hundreds of other women has issues; and since I know my Hobby issue is a big deal, I remind myself that I owe her! She may not know about the Hobby, but just because she doesn't know it doesn't mean that I don't still owe her for it, I do.
STEP ONE: When it comes to the Hobby, she doesn't owe me, I owe her.
In general, I have an intense personality; so I am on occasion pretty fiery; but truthfully she's hella fiery too; and while we aren't Irish, we act Irish... we love, love, love; we fight, fight, fight; we cry, cry, cry and we start it all over again, LMAO.
STEP TWO: Find passion wherever you can!
We have been married 35 years, she is my best friend and she still is gorgeous; especially to me! She's almost 57 but looks like she's 45, especially to me! When I first met her, she was literally the most attractive woman I think I had ever met in person.
STEP THREE: Always choose to see her as beautiful!
She is 5'6", weighs 120, has gorgeous blonde hair, big blue doe eyes, large all-natural C-cups and a perfect ass, especially to me! I'll be honest, even if she is only one of five different ladies that I had sex with in any given week, chances are she is either the first or second prettiest with the first or second-best body, especially TO ME!
STEP FOUR: Constantly remind yourself of her physical positives, choose to dwell on them and compliment her!
Mid-coitus my wife will still say "Stop, what are you doing? You just don't understand women or their bodies." LMAO! But truthfully, I learned a long time ago that her tendency to be sexually-finicky has been a blessing; it forced me to become a student OF HER... to become committed to studying & adapting to HER, so as to better please HER; which made me a better husband AND a better hobbyist.
STEP FIVE: Be a student of your wife and never stop studying her!
My wife is still my most prolific sexual partner. I have sex with my ATF about 55 times a year and I have sex with my wife about 65 times a year; now if I could just pull off THAT DUO, LOL!
STEP SIX: Love having sex with your wife and you will love it even more!
MY WIFE DOES HAVE A NO-GO LIST: No BJs period and no Greek ever!
But why should I even care? I get plenty of BJs and Greek. Plus, my wife... Is the best kisser I have ever had!! Gives these insane standing HJs (that involve her flicking her fingernails on the head of my cock) that no one else has ever been able to duplicate for me!! Loves face to face standing sex more than anyone I've ever met; and she wears these sexy-as-hell high heels when we do it!! Never says "not tonight" and if she's not in the mood she'll say, “I'm not really in the mood, but if you let me sit on your face, I bet I'll get there"!! Has a pussy that just has my cock's number! I could have just come from a three-hour two-orgasm session with my favorite UCF, where, during both “Rounds” I easily lasted inside the UCF’s pussy for 5-10 minutes across 4-5 different positions... YET my wife will still get my old man shaft hard as a rock with those fingernails and then once I’m inside her slit, that pussy just consumes me and pops my top in less than 2 minutes!
STEP SEVEN: Make a conscious choice to relish, cherish and treasure your wife's sexual attributes! Accentuate the positive and decentuate the negative!
If I just spent three hours with a UCF and then go home, I'm not frustrated at my wife, I'm really turned on! I just got to fuck a UCF, then I get to go home, take a light shower and lightly brush my teeth (but I DO NOT wash my face or lips, so that I'm kissing my wife with the UCF’s pussy, which I find incredibly erotic) AND THEN... I’m going to fuck my gorgeous best friend while she is standing up in front of me and wearing a pair of black, stiletto, "fuck-me" heels. My wife could be short, fat and ugly (and who knows? Maybe, objectively speaking, she is) and I would still find all of that AND HER insanely erotic!
STEP EIGHT: Find things about your sex-life with your wife that you still find to be sexy and naughty!
In many different reviews over the years, I made references to the Prom Queen, as in "fucking Terri was like fucking the Prom Queen!" Well, in the real world my wife was the Homecoming Queen AND the Prom Queen AND older than me; and I should never forget that! Forget What? That I was desperate to be with her and love her AND fuck her from the minute I first saw her; further... she put on that White Dress for me and had my beautiful children and has been my best friend AND has let me fuck her brains out more than 2,000 times in the last 35 years; or at least that is the way I choose to see it!
You know how sometimes you make love to a Provider, as opposed to just fuck? Well, especially in your own mind, don't forget to flip that around; don't just have sex with your wife...
FOR HER, make love to her! and FOR YOU, make sure you are still fucking her! When my wife has on those heels, we are fucking! And the truth is, it’s up to me and how I choose to see her... do I want her, yearn for her and hunger after her?
STEP NINE: NEVER forget how much you wanted to fuck your wife, and don't let go of that! WANT HER, YEARN for HER and HUNGER AFTER HER!
I wish I could show you a picture of her, but obviously I can’t; so, just Google Image search “Mariel Hemingway in her 40s”, and that is exactly what my wife looks like today; at least that’s what I think she looks like today!
STEP TEN: Be excited about, proud of and really into your wife.
In final conclusion, I want to give a few of my Provider friends a shout out for the degree to which they are, as individuals, very “wife friendly”; CC and Mia and Jenni and Sam in particular, they are all ladies who I would describe as protective of my wife and family, and what an amazing thing that is! Thank you ladies.
Eastbound & Down,
Bandit Rex