What are some things that are on the good and bad lists from your experience or expectations...?
Here's my take.
Bad Experiences:
--Filthy/sloppy apartment &/or hotel room
--Smoke (tobacco &/or cannibis)
--Poor Hygene
--pets/(small) animals
--Provider tried to "short time" me (not willing to fulfill the agreed upon time)
--Completely rushing/clock watching
Good Experiences:
--Clean apartment/hotel room
--Well thought out session (atmosphere, ambiance)
--Careful consideration (asking for preferences, limitations)
--Excellent Hygene
--No rushing
--No clock-watching
The best experiences I've had was with my former and now my current ATF.
Both not only remembered my birthday, but during those dates, they went above & beyond to make me feel special on my b-day.
They also did the same for our dates during the Holiday (Christmas) Seasons.
I would say most people would mirror SD_Guy 's take.
I'd add in the negative category, hard drug use. If drinking and 420'n are your thing then good on you but if it goes beyond that I'm out. I had an ATF years ago that I would see with a certain amount of regularity and our last meeting became our last meeting because she was high as giraffe pussy on something way more that weed and she was always clean before. In our last meeting she was, anxious, disconnected, speech pattern was way off, jittery and bolted from the session as if she had to pay a dealer. We all have our demons but that was deal breaker for me.
On the positive side is connecting. If its a one time thing or an ongoing series of rendezvous, we're all human and crave attention and connection so when a session comes together where the chemistry is right (or at least feels right), that's a total turn on.
No rush as we all enjoy a little personal connection before disrobing begins. If I was to deconstruct an hour of total intimacy it would include the initial hug and light touch to go with conversation; the appreciation of a lady and her attributes and what drew you to her in the first place, the actual intimacy which usually only takes 30-40 minutes for me (no longer a 2x guy so savor the 1x), and the afterglow dressing and hopefully more appreciation for the experience you shared. $.02
I enjoyed the answers, and I personally during these times am offering my own amenities when booking a nice hotel to accommodate incall requests because I do not provide out of my private residence. I bring extras for my clients/friends to utilize, like bottled water, libations, snacks, hand sanitizer, toothbrush, comb, antibacterial soap, & anything that maybe needed to enhance the experience.
I need to come check you out. Sending love & positivity GK! xoxo
Parking. I've learned to ask ahead of time. I rarely drive to an incall location, I prefer taxi or Uber. If I do drive, I ask the who, what, when, where, and how. It I arrive and it looks sketchy or unsafe, I want to bolt, not good.
If there's a separate fee for the room and I'm expected to pay it, please let me know ahead of time. If I find out last minute and don't have enough money, I might have to use "someone's" tip money . . .
Please don't leave me standing on the doorstep for the entire world to watch me waiting for you to open the door! My privacy and discretion are just as important as yours.
If you or your other providers (roommates) in the apartment have another hobbyist or other hobbyists going on and out when I arrive or depart, please do everything possible to offset men running into each other. I'm not the mayor nor a reverend nor my supervisor nor my best friend, but I don't want to run into any of them either. I don't even want eye contact with men or to hear another man's voice.
Also, this applies when I'm going from the bathroom to bedroom and vice-versa. [In Tijuana, Mexico, the women have a great system. Before the hobbyist leaves the bedroom to go to the bathroom, she knocks on the bedroom door from the inside and says, "He's coming out." If another woman has a guy in the hallway or the bathroom or entering/exiting the apartment, she'll say, "Wait, please." If nothing is heard, then the coast is clear. When I'm in the bathroom, my lady is either in there with me and does the inside door knock when I'm ready to step out, or she waits outside the bathroom door until I'm ready to come out, at which time I myself will knock from the inside. She lets me know to wait or to come out.
After years of hobbying in Tijuana, I've got this down to a science myself, and I've never laid eyes on another man nor do I know of any laying eyes on me.
[Side note: I've also noticed that Mexican women guard their hobbyist from seeing or being seen by other providers in this same way, LOL. I don't know if it's territorial and jealousy, as if preventing wandering eyes on both sides, or if it's just respect for privacy both ways. In all my years, I've only caught a glimpse of one other provider as she went from bathroom to bedroom, she was in a sheer nightie, had a very sexy body, and yes, I was tempted.]
Whether the incall location is her actual house (rare for my experiences), a place she uses just for fucking, a motel/hotel room, etc., it shows. There is an extreme from being way too bare and barren to being way too "lived in/comfy". Neat and tidy always wins out.
Turn the TV off! Just lowering the volume or muting it is not enough.
Temperature! I've been in rooms too cold or too hot, or I've been with women who were the exact opposite of me on how they like room temperature. Mood killer. Erection killer. Date killer.
I'm not 16 years old, nor a gang member, so don't play that rap music crap. And whatever you do play, don't blast it.
Be ready to shower with me as Step Number One. It's my hard and fast rule. Oh, and I already know you don't want to get your hair wet. No woman in history has ever wanted to get her hair wet, we get it.
I carry my own bath towel after too many ratty, worn, threadbare, damp, outright wet, hairy, stinky, moldy, too small, or non-existent towels.
I carry my own toiletries too. No toothpaste? Ugh.
Many bathrooms and bedrooms don't have any place for my clothes once I undress. No closet, no hangers, no hooks, etc. Sometimes not even a chair or table.
I don't want to find out the hard way that the toilet won't flush or does not work in some other way. Ewww.
I carry my own slippers. No walking on bare bathroom floors, shower stalls, carpets, hardwood, tile, bedroom, or any other floors.
I very rarely leave a bed undestroyed or intact. Sheets come untucked, pillows and blankets fly everywhere, if the bed squeaks, there will be a symphony, mattresses are lopsided on top of box springs, any neighbors are going to know whether the headboard is bolted to the wall or an inch away from it, if the bed frame isn't sturdy, it's going down. Be forewarned.
I'm loud, vocal, and I like loud vocal women.
Have a trash can handy NEAR the bed, please. Nothing's worse than not having a place to throw stuff away, or not knowing where it is. I don't want to go hunting for it. [An old military habit is that I take the used condom with me when I leave. I tie it in a knot and drop it into a ziplock bag that I carry for that purpose. Plausible deniability.]