Newbie - FAQ

Re:Curious about doingteeth_smile
SunCharmer 2527 reads
posted

I have had a few overnights with regular clients and they've all been wonderful.  The evening was always centered around an event.  With one client we went clubbing, with another we saw a series of plays, and with another we went to a concert.  Then there is dinner, maybe drinks/dessert, or whatever else is of interest.  The evening was wrapped up at their place where we curled up in front of the fireplace with wine and relaxed.
The next morning is spent sleeping in and making breakfast.

If you're going to do an overnight I would suggest selecting someone you have already seen several times.  Otherwise you may end up wanting to scratch your own eyes out from her annoying habits lol.  

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 5:40:00 AM

What did you and the provider do all night? Did you two sleep at all? I honestly cannot do it 10 hours striaght, does it mean I'm wasting money to try that? What's the up side and down side of doing it? A newbie wants to know.

I have had 2 overnights. the first 1 was awesome, I had only scheduled dinner and escort about 7 hours.  We got back to my room and had about 3 hours left.  But somewhere between 2 & 3 hour she snuggled up and fell asleep. I woke up around 2 am with her sucking on me and we never fell asleep again for the rest of the night. I told her I was out of $. but she didn't care. I saw her alot until she moved.
2nd I paid for a all night and around midnight she fell asleep and that was it.

From what I gather, *nobody* can go for ten hours straight, and even if you theoretically could, you'd both be so sore you couldn't walk afterwards.

From what I've heard others say about the topic, it's best for people who are very concerned about the experience of just hanging out and letting things happen.  Sure, there's probably a *lot* of sex expected, but you get to cuddle a while, talk, share a bite to eat, do it some more, sleep a while, have "morning whoopie", talk for a while longer...

It's supposed to feel a lot more casual, like a date that has gone *extremely* well.  If that's worth the high price tag to you, then go for it.  For many, however, they don't have that much time, or that much money, to spare.

SunCharmer2528 reads

I have had a few overnights with regular clients and they've all been wonderful.  The evening was always centered around an event.  With one client we went clubbing, with another we saw a series of plays, and with another we went to a concert.  Then there is dinner, maybe drinks/dessert, or whatever else is of interest.  The evening was wrapped up at their place where we curled up in front of the fireplace with wine and relaxed.
The next morning is spent sleeping in and making breakfast.

If you're going to do an overnight I would suggest selecting someone you have already seen several times.  Otherwise you may end up wanting to scratch your own eyes out from her annoying habits lol.  

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 5:40:00 AM

An overnight is the ultimate GFE experience, especially if you don't pay for the whole night.  I know it is rare in the hobby, but I have spent the night with one of my ATF's more than once with out paying.  Of course there was no sex during the night, but in the morning, oh what a wake-up call!

Tori Of Atlanta3497 reads

Although I am sure everyone was as impressed as I was by your statement of the "free" overnight.... I am not sure blurring the boundary lines for a newbie might be all that advised.

Understanding you have probably been hobbying for a while, I am not sure the unspecified parameters of overnight intimacy might remain clear in a newbies mind.

My recommendation is to clearly understand going into an encounter what each party is interested in and expecting & then following through.

Especially being new to the hobby, exercising the ability to "leave it at the door" might be a better lesson in life than a free overnight.

Just my thoughts based on years of being a provider......  kisses ~T

We don't want to fry their little brains, as we like to say in the desert.  I don't have much opportunity for overnights, but I've spent time "off the clock", and it seems to be something that develops along with the relationship.  It takes time to understand that it doesn't mean that she's in love and wanting to chuck it all for a lifelong relationship with me.  If I had that experience the first time out, there could've been some serious trouble.

Tori Of Atlanta3769 reads

As a couple hobbyists PM-ed me already.... if you spend "personal time" with a provider, Why would you make a point of notifying the community that you did so? Do you think in any way this is helping your "ATF's" business image??????

Besides, if she is your "ATF" why would you not ensure she knows it by paying for the overnight?

~Just not a well thought out behavior in either case, (*the overnight or the posting*)~

Granted it, this does happen and friendships are made -BUT- that is personally not a part of the Hobby.
(draw the line) & keep it real....... kisses ~T

Number one,the point of my "overnight" post was NOT that I spent the night free, my point was to answer joeb_3872's question about other hobbyist  experiences with overnighters, which I did.  Sorry if you don't agree.  Second, I did not specify only one lady as my ATF.  If you read my previous post correctly about overnight experiences,  I said "ONE of my ATF's"  I believe "one of" means plural or more than ONE. So I truly don't think I have affected anyones "business image".  Also not all the ladies I have seen have been reviewed on TER. Third, why do you assume that I do not take care my favorite ladies? Just because I did not pay full price for the overnights doesn't mean I have not taken care of this particular lady in other ways or at other times!  As a provider do you really think she would have let me stay the night if I didn't take care of her? I don't think so!  Trust me, they know they are my ATF's!

Since when does friendships between providers and hobbyist not have to do with the Hobby or this board?  I would not have become friends with these ladies had I not met them while hobbying.

If others do not jump to conclusions or make incorrect assumptions, then there is no line to be drawn.  BTW its all real.

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 4:01:02 PM

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 4:02:41 PM

Tori Of Atlanta5341 reads

I don't think I made any assumptions. I am a highly educated, woman. I rarely make assumptions. My statements are very frequently based on first hand experience.

I did state that ...."I"... did not think a freebie overnight was a good idea for a Newbie as the lines of separation can become blurred.

I care not to address the justification stated in your points one & two but I will comment on point #3-  

......"Third, why do you assume that I do not take
care my favorite ladies? Just because I did not pay full price for the overnights doesn't mean I have not taken care of this particular lady in other ways or at other times!  As a provider do you really think she would have let me stay the night if I didn't take care of her?...."  

If you did "take care of her" you wouldn't have tried to degrade her services and insult her value by not leaving the adequate donation on the table when you left.

Spending the night with a friend and participating in the hobby are two entirely different behaviors.

If you have friends that you entertain and enjoy then that is in your personal life. In civie life you don't give the woman her donation or gift up front, in full view, where it can be counted and verified. In the hobby you do.

I too, am sorry we don't see eye to eye on this topic.

I've been in the "Hobby" eight years. There is a line and spending the night without recognizing her suggested gift donation is over that line. It is now personal,(at least in your mind).

Again I am sorry if you were offended that wasn't my intent. My intent is to try and help Hobbyist maintain their involvement in the Hobby in a healthy manner that does not threaten or infringe on their present status in regards to lifestyle, family & work.

If a Hobbyists has other ulterior motives, then he
obviously isn't going to agree with my suggestions. But it is a discussion board and I am only adding my thoughts to the discussion.  Happy Hobbying.....  kisses ~Tori

Tori, I fully realize that you are a very intelligent and well educated classy lady.  Those points always show in most of your post.  Even though we disagree on this certain post I deeply respect this and could probably learn a great deal more from you about the hobby.

I am sorry but I took offense to being accused of not taking care of my lady friend.  I have always been and have always been told by both providers and civie ladies that I am a true gentleman.  BTW as you stated in another post "Upscale?" ,which I found thoroughly informative,  I think I meet most of the requirements of a true gentleman.(lol)  Not that this makes me a true gentleman, but I do know the  max. allowed ground time before hangering a private plane at most of the FBO's in the U.S.  My family has been in the Jet Charter/General Aviation business for the last thirty years.  What I feel makes me a true gentleman or what my lady friends tell me is the fact that I have deep respect and care for them and I am always willing to try and usually fulfill their request, demands and wishes. Rather it be my time, gifts or money.

I agree that we must have rules, lines and boundaries in this unique world called the hobby for both parties to survive.  I will also agree that my "relationship" with this one particular lady is unique and special and yes we have probably crossed some boundaries.  I hope we can both agree that even though it is rare, these situations or relationhips do happen, rather it be a newbie or a veteran hobbyist.  I just hope others can keep the boundaries, wherever they may be, in check and enjoy the hobby and their favorite ladies.

It is true that once money stops being exchanged between the hobbyist and the provider, the rules change but that is not the case for me. I never have or had ulterior motives in this hobby.

I have alwyas enjoyed your thoughts and opinions on this board and will continue to do so in the future.  It was never my attention to offend you either (you're much to classy of a lady to do that to) and I to apologize if I have done so.

fz12637 reads

Hmm- not a free one- but an incredible woman that I just connected with on a previous meet. According to her- this was her first overnight in her short career as well.  

Lets see- she came over- off to (7pm) dinner and drinks.  Came home- kissed like teenagers and took our time to get our temps up.  She then jumped on me and did cg and a bj.  After that we went to my hot tub outside.  I don't know what was in me- but we played in it for at least two hours- we did every position we could come up with.  I was afraid we were going to wake the neighbors but at that point I didn't care- it was too good to care. We cleaned up- then to bed- I held her and kissed her and we watched a little tv- then again-we had sex- it was now about 2am would be my guess.  We both passed out with her in my arms.  She woke me up around 8am with a bj and then to some more sex for about an hour.  One of the best sexual nights I ever had with anyone in my life.  Funny thing this was my last night in this hobby- for her as well.   More to it- but I don't want to give the newbie's any false or unrealistic hopes.  

Recommend- yep- if you feel that click with a woman- absolutely- looking back I would of paid 3x what i did.

Tori, I have always been quite impressed with most of your previous post and have learned a thing or two about the Hobby from some of them. Sorry, but this post certainly is not one of them, you are totally wrong on several points.  Number one I did not write the previous post to impress anyone on this board or in this "community".  People say or write things with the intention to impress others because they lack self esteem or self confidence.  Trust me, that is one issue I don't have.  Just ask ONE OF my ATF's (plural) and THEY would tell you the same, also other friends, family and co-workers. In the original post, joeb_3872 was curious about overnighters, I was only sharing what I had experiencd with overnighters.  Maybe I am wrong, but I thought that was one of the many reasons this board and community is here.  Second,  the lady that I spent the night with was the FIRST provider I had seen and my FIRST experience in this Hobby.  I had or have no problem understanding the parameters of an overnight and they were and are quite clear to me.  So one should not assume that just because one is a newbie doesn't mean he doesn't understand the rules of the game.  

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 3:55:52 PM

-- Modified on 8/4/2006 3:58:10 PM

Tori Of Atlanta3938 reads

I merely stated my opinion and thoughts based on your post. Maybe with all the clarifications that you are doing and all the explaining, you just might explain what your motive behind this statement (*a statement you originally posted in the above thread*) the same very statement that invoked my reply:

"I know it is rare in the hobby, but I have spent the night with one of my ATF's more than once with out paying"

Having stated the information above do you care to
offer an explanation to that statement. That statement after all, is the 25 words that invoked my reply. I do not see where I have ASSuME-d anything.

I'm glad you enjoy the hobby, again my apologies if you took offense.    kisses  ~Tori

Stating that I spent the night for free may have been the incorrect thing to say. Because in the hobby/provider world nothing is ever free. BTW it was her that invited me to stay not the other way around.  Two reasons that I was invited to stay the night was first, because I have taken care of this lady far and above her requested donation more than once and the gifts I bring her which she really appreciates.  Second because she enjoys our time together as much as I do.  I guess you might say I paid for those nights in "other" ways.

Tori Of Atlanta4378 reads

~I am not here to intentionally hurt anyone's
feelings..... I have maintained my longevity in the Hobby for the past 8 years by providing satisfaction, protecting my clients and making sure Gentlemen do not get confused about what a relationship with a Provider really is.

This post is not aimed at anyone and any resemblance to any activity listed has probably occurred in the past and might very well be occurring now.

Why do some guys in the hobby start referring to
themselves as friends? All of my regular clients are my "friends"..... for some strange reason there are a limited few who just get off track.....

~I have been seeing you for 4 months so now you want a"special rate" because you enjoy our time so much ????
...... if you really enjoy our time together so much then show me by offering me extra money not asking for a discount.

~If you truly enjoy what we share, show me by
respecting my time, don't constantly go over the
decided appointment time.

~Don't bring me a "gift" but expect it to be credited towards your donation..... a donation is a donation and a gift is a gift. If you don't want to give me a gift then don't.... but please don't degrade me and belittle yourself by implying it will be part of the donation.

~Don't make my schedule more of a challenge by
demanding last minute changes because you "Just have to see me"

Gentlemen pleeeeeeze.... think about it: If I asked you to re-arrange your work schedule, if I disturbed your normal routine, if I invaded your private time...... WOULD YOU CALL ME A FRIEND????

I set up my expected behavior up front and make it
very clear what I expect before you ever even consider visiting me the first time..... so why is it that because you feel we are now "friends" my expectations have changed???? They haven't, I am still a service oriented professional.

Let's just compare what you are really saying to me-
Would you ask your car mechanic to give old Betsy a tune up for free just because he did such a good job last time and you were so satisfied?

If your dentist restored that pearly white luster to your smile would you call him back in 3 months and tell him he did such a good job last time you think he should give you $100 off this time?

If your accountant stood by you though an audit and you came out of it relatively together and in one piece would you tell him that next time you want your other two business accounts handled for the free???

Gheez, how hard is it to understand......


"Friends" in the business are......
 *Clients that are now comfortable enough to share intimate thoughts and concerns with me. (Who did you call when you thought your wife was leaving you? Who paid attention to your last hospital visit? Who answered your call after you had drank just a few too many Brandy's? Who listened to the problems you were having with your son.... your daughter... your mother.... your brother??? ~Yes, it's part of my service but please recognize that !)


 *Clients that remember from time to time that I am special, in their routine. (And show me)


 *Clients that offer to make their appointment in
advance and arrive punctual and leave as expected.


 * Clients that value the "extra" attention I offer to them by leaving a tip from time to time.


 * Clients that may see other providers but spend the majority of their available Hobby time with me.


 * Clients that offer to reset an appointment should something unexpected cause stress with our previously set the appointment time.  



You want to be my friend??? Show me respect and leave a donation that reflects your admiration ....... don't ask to exploit my generosity by requesting added services.

I have friends in this business...... Men who enjoy my company, Men who never request discounts or extra attention and who acknowledge the business aspect of the relationship. These are true friends.

Try to watch your motives and your verbalized
suggestions..... many times they may sound other than "friendly" (Just keep it real) I am a provider, not your girlfriend, not you S/O and not your lover .... I am a provider..... kisses ~Tori

I call my clients my friends, and do consider many as such... as per your definition.  Very well explained.  There is most certainly a difference in relationship with my personal friends, my business friends, my personal lovers.  They all have different boundaries which must be maintained and it helps when they are clear for all to see.

but there are a few rare occasions when I have seen discounts for "friends":

An agency girl is willing to see me independently, so no fee for the middleman.

A provider is running a special and emails me.

A provider needs money right NOW!!! or she will be evicted/car won't get fixed/kid won't get medical care/etc..  This is the worst, but I've seen it.  The hobby is supposed to be fun.

Jadie3157 reads

“but there are a few rare occasions when I have seen discounts for "friends":..

A provider needs money right NOW!!! or she will be evicted/car won't get fixed/kid won't get medical care/etc..  “

Would a real “hobby friend” take advantage of a ladies adverse situation?  I would think a friend would pay her normal going rate or pay her special rate a leave a gratuity to make up the difference between her stress induce special rate and her normal rate.

Please don't think that I would take advantage of anyone.  That's the worst way to hobby.

But it sucks if she has to be in that position.  The hobby should be for people who want to do this, not because they have to do it.  No matter what happens, I would still end up feeling like an asshole if I found out she was impoverished.

atl_mgr2889 reads

You also have friends in the business who have never been clients.  :o)

True, you are a provider, and not my girlfriend, not my S/O, and not my lover... but you are also not MY provider.

You are my friend, and a good one.

Tori Of Atlanta2658 reads

The friends that are not clients would only be invited to do an "overnight" as a friend. That further clarifies my previous statement: I wouldn't expect it to be discussed on a Hobby board because it wasn't a part of the Hobby.

I do consider you to be a friend..... and for that I am grateful (*I appreciate the friends I have in my life*) that is why I make sure they know it.......   much luv ~T

WebTerrorist3235 reads

As I read the first post, Mr joeb_3872, is asking about what to expect from a booked and paid for 10 hour or so overnight appointement...and somehow only two replies,those by Captain Midnight, and Miss Charmer, seem to have dealt with that.

The next two and all subsequent posts seem to be about freebies, extra time and the like...

To the guys that posted about getting free overnights and extra hours for free that turned into overnight appointments even though that isn't what was booked or paid for, I don't know what to say to that...ummm...congratulations? You da man?  Wow you must be quite the sexual and personal great guy to get ladies wanting to spend time with you off the clock?  

None of that has anything to do with what a planned and paid for overnight appointment is likely to entail...which is how I read the initial post (sorry Mr 2nd2nun, but in your reply to Miss Tori's post you said you were just answering the original posters question about other hobbyist's experiences with overnights...but how does that translate to they are best if you don't pay for them? He asked if he was to do ten hours straight, do you sleep, what's the upside and downside to them...not paying isn't really the upside to overnights, it is just your upside with that lady...not really an answer to the actual questions asked...unless you are going to get that lady to give the original poster a free overnighter with her.)

Miss Tori, informative and interesting post...but again not sure how that helps the original poster any...he didn't say he wasn't going to pay, or he was just hoping for an ATF to fall asleep and then do him in the morning as a bonus...I think your post deserves it's own thread, but is far more about the tracks that some replies jumped to and not this thread at all.

OK...now in my own weak effort to assist Mr joeb, my understanding of the overnight appointment is that it is the ultimate unrushed experience, the ultimate in the "date" fantasy, where you go to dinner and/or a show, and then back to the room for the rest of the evening....an extended GFE appoinment where you have your night out, back to the room for the sweaty fun, and then fall asleep together in afterglow bliss, to perhaps wake up during the night or in the morning for more of the behind closed doors activities.  

Is it a waste of money?  That depends on what you are wanting and what you think you are paying for...if all you want is the mattress acrobatics that you can accomplish in an hour or two, and aren't really interested in the non-nekkid sweaty time, then it probably would be a waste to have perhaps 5 to 7 hours of the appointment not be sexual per se, but if you want the fantasy of an evening with a beautiful, engaging woman that will fall asleep in your bed and awake with you in the morning...if you want the fantasy of the "romance" of an eevning with a lady then it would not be a waste...it really all depends on what you want and what to your mind the money is for...if it is for the TACO (Time And Companionship Only) then it can be money very well spent...if it the ala carte activities that you think you are paying for, then you might feel like it was money wasted.  

If you do decide to have an overnight appointment with a lady...I hope you have wonderful time that gives you memories that bring a twinkle to your eyes and a devilish grin to lips for years and years to come.

You consistently hit the nail on the head with your post and sometimes even with a unique since of humor which I find most enjoyable.  Keep it up!

I never imagined my measley tweny five words could create such a stir in this community.  One must always respect the power of their keyboard!

Jadie3265 reads

Arrange to meet one of my LONG TIME lady friends while she was touring my hometown of NYC.  Actually since the difference between an “all nighter” and a 24 hour appointment was only 5 Benjamins I chose the latter.  This appointment was preceded by several e-mail exchanges in which a PLAN OF ACTIVITIES FOR THAT DAY was agreed upon.  At the agreed time (11 AM) on a hot and muggy day we met at her hotel hug and exchange pleasantries over a glass of Manhattan Special I brought because I thought her being a caffeine lover would enjoy.  We then took the subway (not because it is cheap but because in many ways it is the fastest and best way to get around the city) to my childhood neighborhood; stop at two Italian Pastry shops for coffee and pastry and lemon ice.  After we walked about a mile to a renowned Jewish deli to get pastrami sandwiches and pickles for a plan picnic lunch at the Statue of Liberty.  While waiting for our sandwich we shared an egg cream. We than took a long cab ride to Statue of Liberty ferry. The cab driver did not know his way or he was taking us for ride since we went uptown about a mile to get on the East River drive to go downtown to lower Manhattan.  I am sure my lady friend did not know this.  When we finally arrive we waited in line for about an hour for the ferry.  We picnic and stroll, punctuated with embraces and kisses, along the grounds of Liberty Island before getting on another long line for a return ferry to Manhattan.  But this time we took a subway back to her midtown hotel, both took a shower, follow by some play time and nap before going out to dinner at an Italian restaurant.  We than took cab to the Empire State building and spent another 1 to 2 hours waiting in line for elevator ride to the 86th floor observation deck to see the city lights.  Waited in another line to get return elevator took the subway back to the hotel, showered and than more play time before we slept.  I think we also played in the middle of the night but I could have also been dreaming this.  I am sure after another shower we played in the morning follow by going out for breakfast.  After breakfast we muse for hour or so, before it was time to return to hotel and for me to leave.  I left a small gratuity and she gave me a King Kong-Faye paper weight globe as a memento of our trip to the Empire State Building.

As you can see “waiting in line time” exceeded “play time” but even than the amount of play time was as much as I can handle in a 24 hour period. My only real disappointment was that we did not get to do all the things we plan to such as having a knish, visiting china town, little Italy,  the village, and a piano bar or jazz club.  But this was her last stop and day of her tour and she was obvious tired and the excessive heat and humidity did not help. No really upside or down side or waste of money if you know what you are getting into and that why I emphasized having a general agree plan before you start.

Webbie did I stay on topic?


-- Modified on 8/6/2006 10:26:51 AM

except zero play time between us, LOL.

BTW, thank you all for the contributions. Even the off-topic discussion is entertaining.

Tori Of Atlanta2642 reads

There are several reviews posted on what happens on overnights......

Whether you decide to play all night and take a couple trips to the wild side  -or-
You decide to enjoy a night of seduction and romance..... (*if you think the time won't be filled with escatsy and sensual erotic fun....
you might be in for a treat!!!) As you can read below... some even bring their wives, now that's fantasy!!!

I believe reviews speak best from a Hobbyist's point of view. (*here are a couple that give two different views of what an extended or overnight might be*) ......ENJOY the juicy details... (*if you are not a VIP get a membership, these two reviews are worth it*)

http://www.theeroticreview.com/reviews/showReview.asp?Review=411844&user=352641



http://www.theeroticreview.com/reviews/showReview.asp?Review=395856&user=352641


Enjoy..... overnights are all about making fantasies come true!!  kisses ~Tori

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