Hi All,

I have always been curious about what motivates women to enter this lifestyle.  I realize the most obvious answer is cold hard cash, but is there something else?  

I've been with only a few providers, and though I enjoy the "excercise", I often find myself more interested talking to the provider about her life.  I will usually go down the usual list of questions and a lot of the answers are remarkably diverse.  Of course, I never know how much is true (which is understandable as I don't want to share too much about myself), but I am always hungry for more information.

So, for any provider who wants to be brutally honest:

How did you decide to get into this line of work?

Do you feel like you've sacrificed anything to do this?

Do you have any regrets about your decision? Or, conversely, do you wish you started sooner?

How do you separate your work persona from your personal life?

Please feel free to add anything else.  Honestly, I am really just so curious about what you do and why you all do it.  Thanks!

-- Modified on 4/12/2008 11:07:59 AM

Unless you are talking to some Russian or Eastern European prostitute, I don't think most Providers grow up saying I'm gonna choose this profession. 10/10 does it for money, for lack of other marketable skills. Some use it as a means to other things. One Provider I know started as a stripper, and gave only BJs in the clubs. Later got married, got divorce, and is now a single mother with only had a HS education. She also had expensive lifestyle habits (drugs and expensive rent). So, you guessed it, she went to become a Provider. The time commitment is short, makes a lot of money and she can take care of her kid.

We all go through life with regrets and disappointments, Providers are no different.

This comment COULD be interpreted to read that providers are all dumb crack whores who do this because they have no other skills to to support her kid(s), which was the result of a teenage pregnancy.

Guess what jt, I've met women who:

1) are better educated than me, and I have an MA, and once was in a PhD program.

2) are paying for their college, or graduate education education via the hobby.

3) have left successful careers in business, but realized that more more money could be raised having fun.

4) some fantastic moms who will do whatever for her kid(s).  I've also been there to comfort a gal who lost her son in a tragic accident.

Yes, providers have regrets and disappointments, and their career choice is often circumstance driven, but what you describe is nothing like my experience.

jazz32

I just saw my ATF this afternoon, and she left right afterwards b/c she has 2 terms papers due on Monday at a local college where she is a sophomore.

She is also, so she says, saving up her money b/c she wants to buy a 2005 Celica (last year they were made).  She had a 2001 Celica but it was totaled out.  Her dad died last year and she is helpin out her mother with her younger bro's and sis's.

She is an absolute wonder young woman who has her head screwed on straight.  She is rather typical of the women I meet in this busines.  I have not meet any along the lines you descibed.

GT

"There is none so blind as he who won't see"

Sadly, I think some men will never understand that we are not all impoverished, addicted, mentaly unstable women with double digit IQs.

We can get on here and give our credentials, and personal accomplishments, but it won't mean anything to someone that won't believe it. I wonder why some folks as questions when it appears their mind is already made up.

I can't really think of anything to say that you would believe.
The way I see it, you do not have a healthy out look on this profession. Yes it is exactly that a profession. There is so much more to be in this business than just giving blow jobs and spreading your legs. Sure there are woman that do just that and if its that simple for them and they are happy with that good.
For most of us, it takes a certain ability to connect with a sincere and intelligent Gentleman. To be comfortable with yourself enough to allow them to see your Sensual side. Passion is an Art. Not all woman or men can see this.  We are a breed of woman who know how to bring you to that place where you are able to just let go Intimately.

Now I know also that by your additude you probably have l;ittle respect for woman in general.
I know I won't see you. You are definately Not my Type!

I did it to pay for my education and get my life off to a comfortable start. I started my 2nd semester of college and now I am graduating from a top 20 medical school in 2 months and am the only one I know that didn't come from money that doesn't have any school loans.

There is no other job that is more flexible and has the same earning potential for someone still working on their degree. I worked a few hours here and there between classes and on weekends and managed to do alright for myself. I even had fun while I was doing it most of the time  I mean come on now, you can't beat the perks...multiple orgasms on a daily basis that you didn't have to rub out yourself... it doesn't get much better

Many times I have been asked this question and more often than not I give a standard, "I like sex" answer. The truth is far more complicated and perverse.


But I am sticking to it. I like sex.

-- Modified on 4/12/2008 6:25:57 PM

-- Modified on 4/12/2008 6:26:30 PM

Lets face it, we all want to dress them up and call them 'providers' cause it sounds nicer than 'hookers' but in all truth and reality, were it not for the internet they would be on the street corner and we would still be in our autos trolling down the street.  And yes, we all want to believe that line about how they were successful wonderful business women who found this career to be more profitable, but how often is that actually the truth...

-- Modified on 4/12/2008 6:33:44 PM

is so they have an excuse to join TER

you guys had the serious answers covered, so I decided to play this ridiculously absurd card instead.

post, there are 77,042 providers with reviews over the 8 odd years that TER has been taking reviews.  For discussion sake, to account for double or multiple profiles that haven't been caught, call it an even 75000.  

Seventy-five THOUSAND providers. That's how many reasons there are for getting into the lifestyle within your target audience.  People are people, brother, we're all different, we're all flawed, and we're all perfect.  Roll with it and enjoy.



-- Modified on 4/13/2008 3:41:58 AM

Not only did you misinterpreted my comments, but YOUR comments support what I said. My point is NO provider choose this lifestyle. They would have gone to other professions if given the choices. The reason Providers get an education (your points #1 and #2) are to get out of the hobbying business! How ignorant are you to think otherwise. I know many providers (and strippers) and they try and convince themselves and their clients they are working towards something bigger by going tp school part-time.

I don't agree with your pt #3. I have never known any person leave successful businesses period. There are Providers who try and (maybe failed) at business. Some continue to supplement income by "providing". But, the point comes back to that Provider is starting a business to GET OUT of providing.

Your point #4 supports what I said. Fantastic moms will do whatever it takes to care for their kids. I never said providers are not good parents. I know they are and many do it to support the kid.

My example about a provider is a true experience, and regretfully a lot of providers fit that mode...whether they admit it or not. Like I said, my point is Providers do not willingly choose this profession. I am not looking down on anyone (since I hobby, and we all wallow in the same mudd). I am merely answering the question, why Providers go into this profession.

Nobody cares about your inferiority complex and your comments do not address the question asked. The question is asking "why Providers go into that profession." Your personal attacks on hobbyist is not answering the question. That belongs under a thread "why hobbyist choose hobbying?".

If my responses to the question asked touched some nerve for you I'm sorry, but that was not my intention. My point is providers do NOT willingly choose this profession. I choose my profession willingly. All providers do this profession because of some negative circumstances. That could be said of other people of other professions too, but we are not talking about other people!

I like your answer and its straightforward and honest. I can't disagree with you and in addition to my answer, this is true too

Reveal themselves to be hobbyists with poor choice in who they see, an inability to intelligently locate ladies to visit, and a complete lack of judgment...because if this were not the case they would have availed themselves of enough of the smart, gorgeous, clean, outstanding ladies in this business and would have such a jaded, bullshit opinion.

IMO.

I'm no provider but what I learned from chatting with the girls, their lifestyle choose is not so different as a hobbiest who chooses a lifestyle.

I did not decide to do the work I do at the moment, I was looking for a job and this was available.
I grew in the job, and created a career

Off course it has everything to to do with your talents, and what you like to do.

Every kind of business has his up- and downsides.

Being a provider is a hard lifestyle, I honestly think that I do not comply with that style.
So I've very much respect for the girls that do!

But this goes vice versa, I think there are not many provider that could my job

I wanted to ask you about this statement:

"Unless you are talking to some Russian or Eastern European prostitute, I don't think most Providers grow up saying I'm gonna choose this profession."

I'm just asking out of curiosity (I'm not involved with the debate that you guys have above) because it sounded like a provocative statement.  Do a lot of Russian or Eastern European women come here to be providers?

Just keeping things in perspective, thats all. LOL

I discuss almost every personal topic with my atf, but this appears to be the one topic that she clams up about.  One time I just innocently asked a question along the lines of how she fell into this and she immediately clammed up.  I realized what I did and never broached it again.  I felt guilty about being so cavalier about asking such a personal question.  Sure, you might get the pat standard answer of I love sex so dam much that I decided to do this.  But, the reason's going to be more personal and probably something the girl would rather keep to herself.  Then again, how many other jobs can you think of, can you make such huge sums of money in a short amount of time.  The reasons might be personal, but the profession certainly offers a very tempting solution.

And I won't ask you to justify yours.

I realize you are just curious, but honestly, do you ever see anyone asking someone why they chose to be a doctor, or a lawyer, or a fireman, or an airline pilot? Of course not.

Why do I or anyone need a reason to choose to be an escort?

LONG before the internet was invented, there were high class call girls who wouldn't be caught dead standing on a street corner.

The beauty of the internet is that it has allowed the higher end of the escort business to flourish, and has allowed some women to get off the street corner.

And by the way, I don't have one college degree, I have TWO. I am in fact a recovering drug addict - 14 years clean and sober baby. Nary a drop of alcohol nor a drug that was not properly prescribed to me by a medical professional for more than 14 years. Fifteen years in June actually. I was already clean and sober when I went to college for my first degree, and I sure as hell didn't start escorting, which I have been doing for not quite two years now, in order to support a drug habit.

Nor have I ever been abused, physically, sexually, or otherwise by a family member or by a boyfriend. I do not have children that I can't afford to raise by working an "honest" job.

And I know I am not alone, in fact, I would say that my experience is far more the norm than the exception. Unless of course you are conducting your research on Craigslist.

JESUS CHRIST.

WTF is it with you IDIOTS who think that dollar signs are the ONLY function of escorting????

I completed both of my degrees BEFORE I chose to begin escorting.

It is simply amazing to me how much you "know" about escorts. We tried and failed at business. Some of us maybe try to start a business to rescue ourselves from this hell of a life we are living called escorting, or being a hooker as you so elegantly put it.

So if that is how you really feel about escorts, doesn't that mean you are exploiting all these poor underprivileged and desperate women??

My point is this shit for brains - some of us DO choose to become escorts for reasons of our own that have nothing to do with being unable to make a buck any other way.

But THANK YOU to you and to all the other guys who reveal this kind of judgement and elitism toward escorting on the discussion boards. It makes separating the jerks from the gentlemen so much easier.

graduated from Harvard, Reed, UCLA. UCSB, Northwestern (Kellogg) and Long Beach State (MA). One of the most famous  went to American U., stripped part time, moved on to escorting and made it to the top of the escorting biz. (someone should do a movie of her life).

"Some of us maybe try to start a business to rescue ourselves from this hell of a life we are living called escorting"

Are you admitting you dislike this lifestyle? If so, why are you doing it other than to get paid? (my point in the thread). If convincing yourself otherwise is how you get up in the morning, then kudos to you.

And no, you DO NOT willingly choose this profession. If you enjoy this so much, why did you waste so much time in school for your 2 Degrees? You are doing this because Escorting makes you more $$$ than the 2 degrees.

I've only heard one viable counterargument, and that is Providers escort because they enjoy sex. All other responses, are like yours and support what I said.

The original question asked was "What motivates women to enter this lifestyle" and "How did you decide to get into this line of work?"

I have seen/read documentaries regarding young girls in Russia and Eastern european countries, looking up the the prostitutes. That's what some want to do when they grow up. Sad but true.

I'm not sure whether a lot come out here to be providers, but it's probably more prevalent there than in the US. My guess is some do make it to the US, either via human trafficking or they find some sugar daddy.

Most people already have their mind made up on the suject. For the idiots out there that think all you ladies are victims of abuse or drug addicts or the like, no amount of proof will ever convince them. It is an effort in futility. Some people just need to feel superior.

For the rest of us who actually know you ladies on a more personal basis, not just as a piece of meat, not that you aren't very attractive pieces of meat. lol We don't need a laundry list of accomplishments we already get it.

My original point was simply questioning how many are successful businesswomen and how many are not, the answer I do not really know, but I know that it is not all of them. LOL

BTW: Can we go ahead with the leather outfit and smacking my bootie anyway....just in case?

SinsOfTheFlesh,

I'm not passsing judgement on you..just as I'm sure you are not passing judgement on hobbyist. You do not know me, nor do you know how respectful or disrespectful I treat my provider. I put a lot of value on truthfulness and straight-forwardness. I would rather someone answers honestly than sugar-coat manufactured answers. Let's face the reality, escorting is sex. we can talk all we want about companionship until the cows come home, but hobbyist go for sex. Likewise, providers do it for money. it is the oldest profession, regardless of how you package it.

For the record, I am probably the most "Gentlemen" my provider knows. But, not because I put on a fictitous persona when I am with her, but more that I interact with her like I do with my friends.

First, the statement you quoted from me was a paraphrase of YOUR assumptions, not an admission. Furthermore, are you psychic??? Can you read my mind?? Do you know my life story?? THANK YOU for telling me about me. I had no IDEA that I did not choose to willingly become an escort! What a total shock! Thank GOD you know more about me than I do. I really appreciate you for setting me straight!

Second, I most certainly did NOT 'support' your argument. I simply refused to justify myself. Sure, I could give the short and sweet answer of "I like sex" but that is only the tip of the iceberg, and you certainly aren't entitled to that level of intimacy from me or any other woman as to our motivation for the choices we make. By the same token, I will never ask you why you hobby. Nor will I ever assume that you must hobby because you are lonely, or desperate, or can't get laid any other way. Society makes those assumptions for us. We need not insult one another with the same stereotypes and labels that society forces upon us.

Thirdly, where the hell do you get the idea that I "wasted my time" earning my degrees? The last time I checked, education is never a waste of time. I can put my degrees to use if I want to when I am older and gray and no longer willing/able to enjoy my current occupation. The knowledge I gained in college is far from wasted. One of my degrees would have me starting at a salary of $60K and going up from there depending on the specialty I choose. I am neither gaining or losing anything monetarily by choosing instead to pursue this occupation. So, there goes that bit of logic too.

Finally, you have only heard one other argument because that is the only argument you can or will believe, and any explanation more complex than "Gee, I really like sex" would be a waste of time, as well as far more complex and intimate than you deserve. Why should I or any woman bear our soul so to speak on a discussion board to satisfy the curiosity of a man who clearly views us as little better than lazy, uneducated whores? Yes, your attitude really encourages some soul searching insight.

But I do want to thank you for your ignorance, and for voicing the opinion of far too many in this hobby. I am not saying that this occupation does not attract women who see it as a way to make far more money than they can working a different job, but only a geniune idiot would assume that all or nearly all women think and act the same. We aren't cut out of a cookie cutter mold.

I chose this profession and your ignorance appalls me.

All providers do NOT provide because of negative circumstances.

Where did you come up with your assinine thoughts?

but it would appear that I am not the only one to do so!  Your comments are IMHO very dismissive of our provider friends.

I expect that most of us aren't exactly following our dreams!!!  20 years ago, I had every intention of being a teaching professor.  Today, I am a Dilbert designing databases and spreadsheet reports.  I've chosen option b, or is it c, or d.  What changed, circumstances, health, finances, etc.  

I remember from high school career counseling that the average American changes jobs/careers 5 times before retirement.  We are all after a means to the end of of getting by.  Why begrudge providers for looking after themselves!!!

Ask a similar question of lawyers!!!  How many of them can honestly say that they entered their chosen profession due to a love of the law, or in the pursuit of justice?!?  In many/most cases, it is the money that motivates them, and attracted them to their chosen career!!!

BTW, as for comment 3, I know many gals, some with MBA's, who run very successful small businesses. We are all subject to losing our place in the traditional workforce.  The smart, sexy gal looks for other options, using many marketable skills, like communication, time management, marketing, business acumen, etc!  

Yes, in most cases the decision to become an escort is circumstance and money driven, but isn't that true of the career choice for most of us?  

Why criticize, of if you really believe you aren't being critical, why question her motives?!?

-- Modified on 4/13/2008 2:25:16 PM

thats just crazy! I was certainly not forced at gunpoint to enter the world of escorting. It can be and was for me a choice. I have another business on the side which I love also and it continues to grow. I prefer to do both. So that would be my choice.  I never felt trapped or stuck here, I have goals and decided to do this line of work and see what happens. I do love sex so I was attracted to it for that reason and the $$. What you don't understand is I had no idea how much $$ was involved. I entered this biz thinking I could make a few extra and move on.
I started in a different aspect of this. One Gentleman who wanted to see me exclusively and he payed quite handsomely. So why not. I had a great deal of time on my hands and thought...why not have a few more clients.  So that turned into this and here I am. Still have my other business, still see him less exclusively of course, but I have no regrets. Life is good for me, my family and its a win win. So It Is a choice for me. No drug addiction no hardships, its all good. I like what I do. Like any job there are stress factor. No more or less than if I were a teacher or an electrician or what ever. This way I can enjoy both of my jobs and not feel pressure to settle. You seem to not want to believe anyone would put themselves here intentionally.
If thats really how you feel why do you contribute to this biz by visiting the ladies who you say have no choice. Isn't that almost like taking advantage of their poor misfortune?

He won't be worth a damm anymore, I hope his head does not explode. LMAO!

-- Modified on 4/13/2008 5:27:16 PM

And why you or anyone else would need to reason to choose anything would be self-explanatory, I would think.

If the lady volunteers her reasons for deciding to become an escort fine, but otherwise, don't pry.

I don't think Eliz. in Buterfield 8 was a street walker, nor has that ever been the case.  Ask Wilbur Mills from Arkansas (How bout Bill & Monika)  Hey I need a Lewinski right now!!

GT

Self Deleted

-- Modified on 4/13/2008 7:03:28 PM

Haha, cute My focus is on the kiddies and their damaged hearts though

Not that I haven't learned PLENTY about that portion of the male anatomy over the years....lol However, children complain a lot less then grown men when they are sick, so I think I will stick to the adoreable little ankle biters

Wow, I posted this thread on Saturday and now two days later it has sparked quite a debate.  

Could I simply ask you people who are not providers to stay off?  The original post was addressed to PROVIDERS ONLY, so if you hobbyists want to start your own posts about your experiences and opinions about providers, be my guest.  In the meantime, please keep your opinions and comments off my post.  Again, this was an open question for PROVIDERS ONLY!!!!

Dude,

You may not have the brains to know it, but you've already dug your hole, climbed down into it, and for some time now you've been covering yourself with the dirt.  I could just sit back and watch (and enjoy, as you seem like an idiot), but I have my own faults so part of me wants to jump in and save you.  

You won't like this, but: 1) Shut the fuck up and listen to yourself!  Your argument is totally flawed.  You keep basing everything on "providers do NOT willingly choose this profession", something you've claimed as "your point" for some time now.  Well, the audience you're putting this out for consumption DID WILLINGLY choose this profession (remember, shut the fuck up and listen, I know it's hard for you).  Nobody on this board is walking the streets, fearing that their pimp is gonna beat or kill them.  Nobody joined this profession b/c someone put a gun to their heads.  O.k., I now suspect that you have enough intelligence to accept my last 2 sentences as fact.  You may not like it and you may think that I'm simplifying the situation, but the fact remains that my "2 facts" blow "your point" out of the water!  

If you can still breathe, then:  2)climb out of your hole and apologize to all that you've insulted.

She started out seeing lots of guys every day for less than $300 a pop. Ended up at $20,000 or $30,000 for a weekend, 1 million/year. (Some early reviews are still up) I don't have any contact info.

-- Modified on 4/14/2008 6:28:56 AM

-- Modified on 4/14/2008 6:31:11 AM

-- Modified on 4/14/2008 6:32:35 AM

Well, Ding, its an open board. So if someone wants to respond, they can and will.

You did get some pretty clear responses from a few of us ladies though. The fact that only a few women even responded is a bit of a clue how many women feel about this question.

Read both what is present on this thread, and what is conspicuous by its absense, and you should have your answer loud and clear. If you are still not clear though, take a look at the responses some of the men here posted. It will give you some insight into WHY women don't particularly like this question.

Then you can make up your own rules and tell us what to do. But for now and on this board, I think you need to take a chill pill, this is an OPEN forum.

I'm just asking for a little courtesy.  The instructions on the original post were clear.  

Perhaps more providers didn't post because they saw that people took the discussion in a direction it wasn't intended to go.  I try to be courteous to other posts and keep on message, and I was simply asking people to do the same.