Ok so I have two primary questions. This is a little long winded, so I really appreciate in advance anyone taking the time to review and comment.
1. I have contacted two well reviewed local (Seattle area) providers, and now two well reveiwed providers in another city to where I'm traveling shortly (Nashville). I have no provider references because I've never done this before, although I've been reading the Discussion Boards and checking out reviews for about 3 months now while I get up the nerve to do this. I've done everything from the short and brief "love to get together with you", leaving my e-mail and cell number, to full disclosure with a photo and my company website, e-mail etc. I have not gotten any responses. I'm not interested in working my way up through studio-type providers. I'm not even sure I want to do this more tan once (more on that in a minute). Any advice for how a guy who's married and needs discretion to go about being contacted? I own my own corporation so it's not as if they can't check out my viability, etc.
2. I know there are STD risks. I know there are statistics. I'm just looking for some honest feedback on the risk experience of those who might know first hand (i.e. slim to none, modeate?)if I chose a well reviewed, $300/hr-plus provider. No one can promise anything, I realize. I'm married, love my wife to death, and our relationship is unfortunately stale on the sex side. However, I would feel like the lowest scum on the earth if I contracted something and then passed it on to her.
Perhaps this is "TMI", and naïve but there it is. Again, I am forever greatful to those who might respond with feedback.
1. Consider a screening service, like Preferred 411. That will make it easier to be screened.
2. Yes there are risks, but nothing crazy. Only you can decide if you're willing to take them, since none of us would be having that conversation with your wife.
Good luck
A large number of well established providers, myself included, won't see folks without references or "okays" on preferred 411 and date-check. Some will, many won't. It is what it is. I typically return those e-mails but many providers will simply delete.
As far as STD risks, keep in mind that as we do this for a business - we are the ones getting tested regularly and know how to properly use condoms. Personally, I have never had sex without one. I have never sat around going, "damn, I wonder if I pregnant" from screwing a boyfriend BB on a drunken night or any other seemingly typical story you might hear from a sexually active girl in regular life. Having said that, using a condom and keeping your actions low risk is the best you can do in any situation.
There are two main ways:
One is to have a pay as you go cell phone such as a track phone where you pay for minutes in advance. Be sure not to keep any records around for it and store it in a safe place where it won't be found. (E.g., not in the glove compartment!)
The other is to get your own email account at a place like Yahoo and be sure to erase the history of using it each and every time you go on line if there is any possibility of someone other than yourself using the computer.
As for STD protection, it sounds like you'll be most relaxed if you do everything covered, including oral sex. I have been hobbying for over thiry-five years very regularly and enjoying uncover oral sex and have never had a problem. The gals take their health and yours very seriously.
Best of luck. I hope you enjoy taking the plunge.
A few things – your overtures don't sound exactly right. If you want to book with an independent provider your e-mail should be straightforward, business-like and provide a lot of information. You should mention in the first e-mail that you're a newbie and you should be prepared to give complete employment situation. Are you saying you don't want them to contact you via e-mail in response? That would be a big problem. The women make a judgement about your sense of responsibility and seriousness based on that e-mail. I wouldn't send flirty little e-mails. You really need to lay it out for them.
Have you considered working with agencies? I don't know what a studio-type provider is, but there are some extremely reliable high quality providers who work through agencies. In Seattle in particular, there is Elliot Bay. They only do outcalls so you'd need to get a hotel room. But agencies will often work with you even without references.
I'd be really surprised if one of the verification services would be of any use without references.
The risk of catching an STD from a high quality provider is slight.
I don't know how old you are, but basically you're the ideal client for most providers: stable, mature and professionally successful. Remember that you have that going for you. I'd be really surprised if one way or the other you weren't able to break through.
and follow that format to the T!
and if you want follow my advice to study the gal's website, and make reference to something to show you really did read it!
Good Luck!!!
-- Modified on 3/4/2009 7:07:39 PM
Try sending an email explaining your situation, newbie, include your work information, and your name. Ask for a session on a specific day and time, and see if you get a response. Sometimes that will make the difference between getting a response or not. The ladies get so many emails, this is the way they figure out who is serious.
-- Modified on 3/4/2009 7:24:43 PM
Being a hobby virgin myself soon to lose that in a couple of days, I found the folks in here to be enlightening not to mention educational. As for my $0.02 worth, you don't have to get a real second cell phone, just a SIM card from the same carrier and just swap it out when necessary. Oh yes, SIM cards can be purchased, pay-as-you-go. It is easier to hide a sim card than a cell phone, you can stick it in your wallet along with the emergency condom.....
Have fun!
Be safe!
You all totally rock. I appreaciate the great feedback. Perhaps it put the energy out there to the universe, because it looks like I've got myself a date in Nashville! Wow what a feeling 
. I'd still appreaciate any other feedback. It's good to have the support in taking the leap. Anyway, thanks again!
Asking for a specific date and time will often get a response!