Ok...so my wife has been out of town for two plus weeks and I was thinking of staying home from work an afternoon to get things back in order. I had this devilish idea of a hiring a naughty maid to help make the work more enjoyable. There are some services out there but thought I'd post and see if any of our local favs have ever done anything like this. PM if you want or just reply. Thanks!!!!!
The one site in the area I looked at says:
"We are NOT an escort service! Therefore do not offer or suggest sexual favors. If our maids feel uncomfortable, harassed in any sexual way or threatened we will leave the premises immediately with no refund. We are a professional cleaning service; you must keep your hands to yourself. This helps to make our professional sexy maids feel comfortable, the more comfortable we feel, the more flirtatious we will be." I don't want to pay $110/hr with a 2 hour minimum for a tease and potentially blue balls.There is no touching at all! The maids just clean in the nude.
"We are NOT an escort service! Therefore do not offer or suggest sexual favors. If our maids feel uncomfortable, harassed in any sexual way or threatened we will leave the premises immediately with no refund. We are a professional cleaning service; you must keep your hands to yourself. This helps to make our professional sexy maids feel comfortable, the more comfortable we feel, the more flirtatious we will be."
I don't want to pay $110/hr with a 2 hour minimum for a tease and potentially blue balls.
I'll make the bed when we are done 
If I had another woman in the house, somehow my wife would see or smell some evidence. She misses nothing. In other words, be very careful!
It only works in the movie. So many ways the 'maid' could easily fuck up your real life, unless you really don't care.
... sex life, you seem tremendously eager to express your contempt for other people's ideas. If you bothered to read the original post, he is talking about inviting an established "fav" over to take on the personna of a maid. It's called role playing, with maybe a little actual cleaning getting done in the bargain.
Now to be sure, any time you invite a provider to your home to deliver an illegal service, it has the potential to fuck up your life. That's why we take pains to ensure we only invite established and trustworthy ladies to our homes. There is risk, no question, but just in case you hadn't noticed, there is risk in every aspect of the hobby. We each get to make our own calculation about what risk we are willing to accept, and your eager desire to caste scorn on someone else's calculation is just, well, stupid. It would be easy to talk about your penchant for posting lowball and "brutal" reviews, and then bragging about it on the board, while booking with "just about every chick that came through Bloomington" for the past year+ (all your words), and how that has real potential to fuck up your life in so many different ways. Have you heard the one about glass houses and stones? See, the OP didn't ask if you think it's a good idea. He asked if any ladies were interested. So basically you offered up a gratuitous insult. But if he had asked for opinions, the way your presented yours makes it virtually certain that no one is going to pay any attention.
When I first started someone called me to do his dishes then do a strip tease. Pretty fun! I used to clean houses and found this role easy to fall into 
And I didn't ask for your opinions of me, so STFU.
Now to be sure, any time you invite a provider to your home to deliver an illegal service, it has the potential to fuck up your life. That's why we take pains to ensure we only invite established and trustworthy ladies to our homes. There is risk, no question, but just in case you hadn't noticed, there is risk in every aspect of the hobby. We each get to make our own calculation about what risk we are willing to accept, and your eager desire to caste scorn on someone else's calculation is just, well, stupid.
It would be easy to talk about your penchant for posting lowball and "brutal" reviews, and then bragging about it on the board, while booking with "just about every chick that came through Bloomington" for the past year+ (all your words), and how that has real potential to fuck up your life in so many different ways. Have you heard the one about glass houses and stones?
See, the OP didn't ask if you think it's a good idea. He asked if any ladies were interested. So basically you offered up a gratuitous insult. But if he had asked for opinions, the way your presented yours makes it virtually certain that no one is going to pay any attention.
You feel so free to offer your unsolicited opinion and are so quick to admonish others that offer their opinion to you. That is classics narcissistic behavior, have you been formally diagnosed yet?
Moderated
We weren't talking about my life we were discussing your narcissistic behavior and your offering your unsolicited advice while admonishing other for doing the same. Please try to concentrate and stay on task
Do you have a list of fucktards..It seems that we should be standing in line to make sure we are recognized as a fucktard by you.
Most of the time the term Bat Shit Crazy is reserved for a crazy provider-
But you are now officially deemed BSC. Being the narcassist that you are, you will probably wear the title with honor.
This is not the usual GFE thing. We know ahead of time that she will wear a skimpy outfit and I get to fuck her randomly as she goes about her cleaning duties. Greek included. PM me if you want more info.
I am single, so no worries on the SO/wife part. And my place really needs cleaning. I have arranged an hour.
Unfortunately, people wouldn't adhere to our "no touching " rule to keep it legal and safe. Better than what I used to do back then for side work though ..clean and deodorize death houses as if nothing had happened there.
Only a couple left- they probably never happen
Getting a blow job from a beautiful nurse in the hospital.Getting a bj (love those bj's) from my stylist as she cuts me hair and after she rubs her huge titties in my face and lets me finger her to multiple orgasms. Anyone with a stylists chair in their infall?
You've had a good run at them, surely there's more to be done.
there were a couple that I didn't write home about
I'm the new fucktard#1 in town. Do I get a badge or something?
Thanks!! PM with details if you can!
What he said. Women have senses and smell better than a bloodhound when it comes to other women, never underestimate that power!
I've had a few uncomfortable moments. I once wore a shirt on a "date", my date did not wear any perfume or lotion at my request. I hung the shirt and pants away in a safe place for 3 months as precaution before pulling out the shirt to wear one evening. My wife says "where did you wear that shirt last". I say, no idea. She says "It smells like someone else". I could smell absolutely nothing but the closet it was hanging in...I just said, have not worn for a long time, it was just hanging in the closet dear. Another time I had given my date a ride home since she took a cab to the hotel I was at and it was very late. I did not check the seats for hair...needless to say my wife found a couple very long dark hairs (she is blonde) and could not figure out where they came from. I blamed it on giving my sons friends a ride. Glitter....watch the glitter!