Things we really don't want to hear.
1. I don't want to hear you talk hateful about your wife and how you are soo unhappy with her. What she does or doesn't do in the bedroom.
2. Most of us don't want to hear about your "other sessions".
Questions best not asked .. if asked a probable response.
1. Do you think my dick is one of the biggest you have ever had?
"Sure it is"
4. Would you consider dating me?.
Acutally, what your asking is "Can I come fuck you for free".
NO.
5. How many men have you seen today?
"Just you." 
...That is all I can think of for now
I enjoyed your reply to Joc, very appropriate, except for the first one. I think listening to your client lament his incomplete relationship is actually in the job description. The way I look at it, is that you all are engaged in the practice of therapy, and that is part of the therapists job, especially when it is the reason for your success in the field. If it weren't for those types of marriages, your business would be greatly reduced.
I am not your psycho therapist. I am a companion. I am here to create a fantasy for you. I am not here to take on your problems and solve them. I am here to listen to your desires and fantasies and do my best to make them come true and to make you feel the way you want to. You don't have to put down your wife or your marrige in doing so. Fortunately there are several amazing women here in Atlanta who can not only do that but are also genuine AND are caring. We also happen to care about you as people too. It isn't fair for you to dump your crap on us. This is exactly how we get burnt out. Can you imagine having to deal with every single one of your personal lives on a monthly basis like we do? I think not. I care about you, I love being with you. I love making your wishes come true. That is my passion.
Don't bring your crap to me.
You are also mistaken when you say if it weren't for those types of marriages our business would be greatly reduced. You're making another wrong assumption. First of all, a great deal of my clients (always has been) are single professionals who just don't have the time or desire for a relationship. I am kind of like a surrogate girlfriend. (without the strings) The married friends I do have are generally happy from what I understand. They have a great married life. They just like variety and a little spice. They wouldn't give up thier marriages for anything.
It's always interesting to get other people's perspective..
Just don't bring your crap to me.
Respect me equally by coming to me fresh, excited to see me and don't expect me to be your dumping ground for your emotional baggage.
-- Modified on 2/13/2004 9:27:27 AM
I will say this...The last thing we are talking about is the state of their marriage or how miserable he is. I rarely have to be a therapist so to speak. When he walks through the door, its all about getting to know one another. He usually has a big smile on his face and lots of affection ensues. Small talk and answering a few questions about myself. It is usually a short time as the anticipation of getting to other things is generally how it goes.
When I go to see provider, I don't wnat to hear her problems nor do I wish her to hear mine. I am there to have a good time and may be find little about her a person and may be build friendship.
None of us need to walk around grumpy blaming others for all our problems, which is hardly true anyways.
My simple philososphy is, Got a problem, can you do something about it, then do it. If you can't do anything about it, forget it. If can do something about it and don't want to, keep it yourself and don't dump on others or rest of the world for that matter.
Simple philosophy for simple mind.
I do NOT want to hear belly-aching about how bad life is or what "bad luck" a person has run across lately. There is a time & place for everything...this ain't the time nor the place. Also Miss Provider (just a hint)...never...NEVER ask about the wife & "how many children do you have?" What a friggin' downer (pun intended).
I totally agree with you Brooke and you stated it much better (nicer) then I ever could!
Part Timer .. Please don't take that as I don't want to hear about your "life" ... I just hate to hear men talk hateful about thier wives. It is just a real mood buster for me. I enjoy spending time with "nice" men....not haters.
A counselor I am not....a listener, yes...But you can't surround yourself around too much negativity in this business or like Brooke said you will burn out or turn to other venues to numb your feelings.
Raven
Brooke I think you hit the nail on the head, but it works both ways. The last thing guys want to hear from a provider is all about problems with the kids, the ex, the boyfriend, the cashflow, etc. Likewise, there's no way we should expect it to be OK for us to unload on a provider. Both parties should hit the room with a positive attitude about how the session is going to go and concentrate 100% on making it an unforgettable experience.
I agree with you that it's better to have the encounter be an escape, and one should treat you like a lover, not a therapist. I personally don't like to talk about my marriage and I certainly never speak hatefully about my wife. She is a wonderful person and I love her, it's just an incomplete marriage. I was referring to the guys who do feel the need to vent about their marriages. My point was simply that being a good listener to someone who is pouring out their troubles can provide a very valuable service. I was probably wrong in saying that it is part of the job description. It can work for some providers and not others. It would perhaps be best to get a guy who is feeling down about his marriage involved in enjoying his fantasy instead.
It sounds like a touchy subject for you. You must get frustrated with people sharing their feelings with you too much.
This isn't touchy for me at all. lol This is common sense.
I find it interesting that you say when you are down about your marriage, you should just enjoy the fantasy instead. I am beginning to wonder what you look for in a session with your girl. How about instead of expecting the provider to make your troubles go away, you wait until you can fully appreciate the experience and get the most out of it.
Again, you say that it can work for some providers. My question is why expect us to handle it at all? I don't want to sound like a cold hearted bit%h. Anyone who has met me will tell you I am a genuine caring person who cares about the people I meet. I also develop amazing friendships with some. I have tremendous amount of compassion for people.n What we are missing here is that this is a fantasy world, not dating! The lines are so easy to smudge.
This is actually a rather easy and yet complex issue.
If you see a girl who does nothing but complain about her life, blah blah blah and you don't put that in her review, you are perpetuating her bad business and provider experiences because another guy is going to get the same thing (Now this doesn't mean we can't have bad days). I am the first one to say that a girl should conduct herself with class, professionalism and be the best she can be. If she isn't, then she needs to take the day off. I've done it. I've done it recently. I would rather not take an appointment if I am not 100% than to have a piss poor session and not be my best which is what we both deserve.
There is responsibility on both sides. You have the ability to see whomever you want. What can you possibly expect but a bad session if you see a girl who has a less than stellar reputation? You gents either don't realize or care that you set the bar in some ways. If you want great experiences, go see a proven provider who has a reputaion for what you are interested in. It is also great to meet new girls and TOFTT now and again. Again, you also have the ability to use the review service on here to say whether it was good or not. However, you also have the responsibility to be fair. Understand we do NOT have the ability to tell our side so be careful in using the power of words.
This is amazing to me. Go see someone who you will have a good time with and don't support the drama ridden, unclean, or whatever, girls who can't get thier crap together. Your lack of dollars will eventually get rid of them. You would be amazed how much the service level would step up if some of these girls thought their livelihood was in jeapordy. YOU HOLD THE POWER! lol
Girls who have good reputations and great service won't ever have to worry. They will have business till they decide to get out.
This is simple basic business principles. It amazes me how so many of you gents have successful businesses, hold important positions in your company but when it comes to a woman, you guys lose your minds. LOL
We ALL have a responsibility. That is what part of being grown up and not playing with crayons is about. Although, I'll admit I love playing with crayons.
As always, think naughty thoughts....
xoxo
B
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You are right in your feelings,.... and obviously this is not a touchy subject for you.
-- Modified on 2/14/2004 10:05:22 PM
Question, Brooke. What if the role is sometimes reversed and the provider shares frustrations with the hobbyist?
Are we suppossed to be total cads and make it a game?
A lot of providers laugh behind the scenes and take a hobbyist's feelings for granted.
Or should we listen, not be judgemental and try to offer our support.
Not all hobbyists 'fell off the turnip truck' yesterday. Most of us respect the fact that this is hard on the ladies. And to quote Emerson 'The only way to have a friend is to be one.'
True friends can always be counted on the fingers of one hand and often change with time. That is the main reason that the baggage is out there. You should appreciate the fact that people trust you enough to share thier true feelings.
Consider the fact that they choose to treat you as human and not just a sex object!
Speaking as a single professional I think Brooke was exactly right in what she said.
I am not saying that she isn't. I'm just pointing out that it can work both ways. However, if you see a provider frequently and book extended engagements of 3 hours or more you will probably have times when you see the genuine personality of the hobbyist or provider.
If you book longer engagements and see someone frequently, be prepared to accept that person 'warts and all'. Your time with them will not always be Fantasy Island over a long period together. Just keep in mind that everyone is human.
Thanks for the input and food for thought, Brooke and Ace. I hope you are both enjoying a wonderful Valentine's Day!
Actually I think the proper therapist for "how bad you have it with your wife" is the local bartender. Nothing ruins a session more than whining, which is the category this falls into. I suspect the correct conversation would be mutual ego building.
You are to dang funny..
How bout when they wanna drill you on what is going on with all the other girls..
LOL, Raven! Men have their own version of "does this make me look fat?" questions, and, the truth is...they can't handle the truth. I'm not man bashing here. It's just a fact of life that most of us aren't prepared to deal with the truth,and would rather continue in a cloud of delusion than grow. So,we surround ourselves with those who will tell us what we "want to hear" even if we suspect it isn't the truth.
My .02,which is not a pro or con vote for anyone else's comments:
Because I do spend some time giving massage before getting to other things, men often want to talk. THere are plenty who say they love their wives,BUT....
And there are those who are miserable. Although I don't think its in my job descrip, I don't mind listening. And being more blunt than most people (I feel I have nada to lose), I ask whether they've approached their wives with this issue. And I let them know the "she won't understand" response is a lame excuse. I don't think anyone does their spouse a favor by avoiding a subject of importance to them. It doesn't go away on it's own,and usually builds resentment. It's the old "I'm not going to tell you why I fly off the handle at little things. You'll just have to guess what's REALLY bothering me!" ANd staying in a miserable marriage? WHom are you benefitting is my usual question. Yes,it's how I get some of my business,but coming to see me is not a solution to one's marital problems anymore than drugs or alcohol. I don't pretend to have the answers, but I do like to get folks to ask themselves questions so they can solve their own issues. If it means they work on their marriage instead of coming back to me, then that cant be a bbad thing.
As A hobbist and someone whom is married I agree with Brook ...
I go for the fantasy .This is my off time from everything !!
Meeting and enjoying each others company is what is important .
If you need to unload your problems , or have your ego enlarged go find a srink .If you and the provider become friends thats a plus , don't abuse it .
Life is an adventure ,live it !!!
hmm, how things change... and talking about tool size, do providers tell guys that they are well equiped whether they really are or are not?
-- Modified on 2/13/2004 6:25:42 PM
Even when a woman does fuck for free, the guy always pays one way or another.
Providers, have you ever got someone who started crying right, during or after the session due to personal problems??
U talking about crying during conversation?
Crying is healthy. Some men can't cry but need to...so they go see a domme who gives a little pain. Believe it or not that provides a safe way for them to cry and it is a release of stress. They feel better afterwards if it is done right.
Raven
-- Modified on 2/14/2004 7:39:25 AM
During conversation. Just wondering if any dude go for the fun but is so much trouble from problems that you have to baby sit instead (not for fun of course).
No, it hasn't happen to me but I was just curios of the reaction of the provider and the outcome.
I realize I have a very special provider. She listens and does judge and I listen and do not judge. It is not a dumping appointment. Our own curiouity peaks many of our questions. Many questions are personal many are not. If she does or I do not want to answer the question, we just move on. It is just sharing.
I have been guilty of some of these often.
-- Modified on 2/13/2004 9:41:59 PM
As a Provider, I see myself as a therapist, of sorts, and as such, I feel it important to talk to each of the people who come to see me, especially if they're new, but I talk some before each session to people I've seen before too. I feel it important to listen to everything they have to say... I never pry into a client's private life, i.e., their wife, kid(s), work particulars, etc., however if they want to tell me, I'm more than happy to listen. The only thing that I DON'T want to hear is derrogatory comments concerning another Provider. It doesn't annoy or irritate me if they want to tell me they saw someone else, but I really don't want to hear what went on play by play nor do I want to hear anyone make negative comments concerning another. After all, that's what reviews are for.... well, some of them. I can read that if I feel so inclined. I take my clients sharing with me their personal problems as a huge compliment because if I am to label myself a GFE, then as their "girlfriend for the hour" so to speak, I feel that part of my job is to listen, offer my advice, opinion, and/or perspective if requested, and/or lend a helping hand if I can. I usually do not share the goings on of my personal life with my clients, because I feel that the session should be all about them. After all, they are the customer... I'm the service Provider. There have been a very few that I have shared bits and pieces of my personal life with, because they asked... or because a certain experience was similar to an experience they were going through. I feel that my job description as a Provider is to be whatever I feel my client needs and/or wants and I do that to the best of my ability.
Just my .02.
Jaclyn
1. How many men you have seen today.
2. How large or small my package is compared to others.
3. How sore you may be feeling from a previous session.
4. How many children you have.
5. Why you decided to enter into this trade agreement.
6. How long you have been in the trades.
7. When your cycle is.
8. What your tour schedule is.
9. How your boyfriend feels.
I like to be lied to. Please make me believe that I am the only one you have ever or will ever see like this. Make me feel that the money is only a generous gift bestowed upon you by me to show my gratitude for such a lovely lady. Please let me think that you are really enjoying our session and are turned on by my presence. Let me feel that it's all about my enjoyment not dependant on how quickly I can finish or whether I finish at all. Please thank me for coming and let me know that I am a special guy who deserves more. One last thing that you can do to make sure that I keep coming back: Let me believe that under differant circumstances we would have been a terrific couple. Make me think that I am just the type of guy whom you are attracted to. Tell me that my wife is a lucky lady and that you hope she feels better soon and is able to provide me all the love and affection I need.
Im not stupid. I know its all an act. But I choose to play into it. Im not going to read between the lines and divorce my wife to ask you out out to dinner. I just want to be in my own slice of fantasy for the hour or so. Girls that can do that are my ATF and truly are GFE.
Just my 2 cents
DO THAT AGAIN!!
During a session: Nothing.
If your talking, your not doing something right. I'm paying $$$ an hour to talk, they have other professional much more qualified for that.
Also when I use another provider(s) as a reference, I don't want to talk about the session with her/them. It's history and if you want to know, you'll have to wait for the book. Also when finished, don't ask me how you "Stack Up" to the other provider(s).
Ludwig Van Beethoven
Wow, I've actually been amazed at some of the responses to this thread....I understand that many providers do get burnt out...But you know, we are here for a purpose, and I have noticed that while some providers are well known for sucking it down at the drop of a hat, and taking the team without breaking a sweat, smiling and going on with the lusty fervor so many enjoy and adore; others are known for their passion, their attentiveness, and the ability to adapt to a gent's feelings/desires...whether it may be when they feel down because of something going on, or maybe an insecurity they need special handling for...
We do serve a purpose, for certain people. Many of my clientele would never see those on the other end...as many of the other end's clientele may never see me or those like me...But neither is wrong...the beauty of this board and others like it...We have a choice...See who you want to see, or not...
I've never heard a gent say once his SO/wife/partner was horrible or such...I'm there for whatever that gent may need...some like to talk...If they trust me enough, I will always listen...
But I'm a big softie, anyway...Because I know sometimes, you gents can be all we have on OUR not so greatest days....knowing that a gent enjoys my company enough to return, with a genuine smile, and the sweetest first kiss...
Priceless indeed....
But that's me....;-p
Sexy Sofia
"Just let me know if I'm hurting you"?
Perfect response:
"Okay.........have you put it in yet"?
Feed up Marriage Counselor finally screams out:
"Both of you shut up, we'll never get anywhere unless you stop calling her canyon cunt and you stop calling him neddle dick"!