Newbie

references
JUICYIITIMES 284 reads
posted

does it make you more comfortable or less comfortable if a provider asks you for references?

brat801635 reads

Hi all - I have made contact with my first prospective provider (phone) and have discussed setting up a visit for this coming Friday. We talked briefly and she told me to give her a call on Thursday to finalize. She didn’t ask for any references (or similar questions) and I have noticed that there are many discussions on the newbie board around the need for providers to request references from hobbyists. She is highly TER reviewed and has her own web site. I was a bit surprise she didn’t question me more. Any insight here or do you think she will inquire more of me when we finalize the visit. Thanks in advance.

based on their gut feelings, especially after a good phone call.

Did you give her other information such as work and home addresses and phone numbers?  Sometimes that is enough to satisfy someone.

I would think that if she wants references, she would have already asked.

Does she know that you have not yet seen a provider?

She might have her own system that she is using to screen you.

Knowing you are a TER member is a good start.

She can look at your profile and posting history here.

Also if she has a phone number and email address, she might have been able to find out some basic info from you.

She might do very light screening esp if the session is set up a few days in advance.   So I wouldn't worry about it.

...he has no "profile", and as a newbie, he has no posting history (only one other newbie post).

I didn't check him out, I was just stating that not all of us use references as part of our screening and someone who's a TER member can be checked out.

If he has no history on TER, the lady he is seeing may have looked at other things to screen him.

probably covered all the stuff she might have done.  Providers all have their own ways of determining whether or not you are safe, including gut instinct.  If she is well-reviewed on here, then you are probably good to go.  Thank your lucky stars you didn't have to jump thru dozens of hoops to get verified, and go ahead and enjoy.

Swim

I will glady give them, but asking for references causes too much info flying around for my liking anymore.

does it make you more comfortable or less comfortable if a provider asks you for references?

brat80239 reads

She does of course have my e-mail and phone number of course. The reason for my question was more along the lines of reading on TER that a provider not asking for references should be a flag. Glad to hear some/many providers go by gut instinct or other methods. Just another newbie going through the learning process. Thanks to all for the great information.

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