TER General

Good post Ziggy....
saturnsky 270 reads
posted

The part about being narcissistic was interesting. There was a thread not so long ago with a quiz you could take. I scored a 4, so my level of narcissism is low. I love to converse so I guess that's why I am on here.

Guys here seem fascinated by themselves and the women they hire.  Here's one of the more interesting articles I've read lately...

http://jonmillward.com/blog/attraction-dating/life-of-a-call-girl-fantasy-vs-reality/



-- Modified on 7/20/2012 3:20:36 PM

dinamohum463 reads

some of us gents know the other side and we know, "Hookin Ain't Easy"
And, it's usually, if not always, the clients who make it so.

I liked both of his blog posts, the one you posted and the original one analyzing hobbyist reviews, though I do prefer the one on providers. I think peer pressure has a lot to do with the conformity of the reviews, and so they reflect the attitudes of certain dominant providers, or the structure imposed by the review site, and not the personal attitude of most hobbyists. It would be easy to find all sorts of fault with the methodology, but since he admits it is qualitative research, probably more accurately a sort of analytic, investigative journalism, the criticism would be for doing badly something he does not pretend to be doing.

The perspective is helpful, though it is surely misleading, too. One thing I have not seen in any research or reports is how attitudes evolve over time. My guess is that some of what he thinks is just random variation might show clear trends if one separated how ladies (and gents) who had done this for less than a year viewed things, versus people who had been doing it for two years or more. At some point it goes from being something I am doing for a bit, trying out, to being part of who I am.

I like to refer to the house of mirrors aspect of this, where I am trying to genuinely please a lady who is trying just as hard to appear genuinely pleased no matter how she actually feels about what I am doing. So I look for clues aside from the careful performance, and one kind of clue comes from these kinds of report. Once again, it confirms how hobbyists view our favorites the way we view our political representatives. Much like we know that politicians in general are just interested in playing the game for personal benefit and to get re-elected, but still re-elect our representatives because we think they are different, we also know that the majority of providers never have Os and the rest seldom do, but we each believe our favorite comes every time she moans and shudders. A bit ironic, but of course she is our favorite specifically because we believe her performance, isn't she?

As for your comment, that we are fascinated by ourselves and the ladies - yup, this is all very narcissistic. I am pretty sure that to be around here very long either as a provider or a hobbyist, you need to be that way. And I suspect the most active posters are among the most narcissistic since there is this constant "look at me, look at me" aspect to the act of posting.

By which I mean no disrespect or criticism. I am one, after all.

zig

saturnsky271 reads

The part about being narcissistic was interesting. There was a thread not so long ago with a quiz you could take. I scored a 4, so my level of narcissism is low. I love to converse so I guess that's why I am on here.

In addition to what you have said, I feel that social skills are also taken into account when interacting with others.
You mentioned realizing that a provider is trying hard to act as if she is enjoying herself.  Your
Perception shows you have social skills and are aware of other's behaviors or lack thereof.
You, my friend, are most likely the exception to the rule.

serpius179 reads

Ziggy,

I do agree with you on this quoted statement below.

Providers call it "free advertising". Hobbyists call it "look at me" posts.

A few active providers who are the most active on the forums do tend to be this way. Those are the kinds of people I stay away from. Nothing but an ego trip for them and I won't be a part of it.

sunrosc

Posted By: ziggy440
And I suspect the most active posters are among the most narcissistic since there is this constant "look at me, look at me" aspect to the act of posting.
zig

No problem there since none of them want any part of you, since you 're the kind of people they stay away from! :D

Posted By: Capricornus
Ziggy,

I do agree with you on this quoted statement below.

Providers call it "free advertising". Hobbyists call it "look at me" posts.

A few active providers who are the most active on the forums do tend to be this way. Those are the kinds of people I stay away from. Nothing but an ego trip for them and I won't be a part of it.

Capricornus
Posted By: ziggy440
And I suspect the most active posters are among the most narcissistic since there is this constant "look at me, look at me" aspect to the act of posting.
zig
-- Modified on 7/20/2012 4:34:03 PM

matuschek185 reads

...for posting the link.  Interesting articles.  And thanks to ziggy, whose comments were, as always, thoughtful and articulate.  Good thread on what has become a weak board.  Hope it doesn't get pulled...

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