Legal Corner

Need some advisesad_smile
beccalicious 3739 reads

I had been seeing this guy for about 6 months and the last 3 months we have not been in a relationship as I told him I didn't want to be in one anymore I of course didn't tell him the reason why was so that I could become a provider at least not right away mainly cus in all the time we were in a relationship we would argue and I notice that our arguments got to be very regular and became more and more aggressive and down right nasty to the point of threatening me with violence. Now when I met him he had just found out his ex girlfriend had cheated on him with not one guy but 2 at the same time and if that was enough she then slept with one other guy the same day which she ended up staying with. Well he found out as she had sent him a MMS of her giving oral and many other sexual acts. Now what he did next should have sounded alarm bells for me but it didn't most likely cus I am not a cheater I would just assume end a relationship then do my thing so I didn't feel i would find myself in her situation. At any rate he trash talked her online badly emailed her family made a website of nothing but this ex and her nude pix and a lot of personal info and it got bad he become very obsessed looking and searching for stuff day and night. Well as I said I ended the relationship and didn't tell him about becoming a provider not at first but since we had broken up we were getting along much better he was giving me my space and the arguing had almost all but stopped. So though I didnt need to tell him it did bother me that he would get the information and it wouldn't be from me and that might set him off wrong so I went to him and explained that I was going to start making appt & he was great about it really for a week it was great but then last Fri all holy hell broke loose & the fun began as he had spoke to a hobbyist on here who had wrote a review on me (which is very incorrect all over the place I have asked for it to be removed twice now and have yet to get a reply) At any rate he claims he got in touch with this gentleman who left this review and that the hobbyist was very fourth coming and very helpful in discussing the session and so on. First is that proper? Can that be done? Should that be done? is there any rules regarding this type of thing? My privacy I feel has been violated in the worst way. To add injury to insult my ex not only spoke to this hobbyist he then to posted a review on my profile and then proceeded to attack my reputation making comments on my pix and trying to ruin me. He even sent me an email and texts telling me he was going to do this, and I just think this has to be illegal? He has ruined my rep already as I was getting a min of 3 calls a day but since Fri which was my busiest day as well as Mondays I have gotten 3 calls total. Now I cant pick up and move I have kids here and strong ties which reminds me he sent my grown kids texts telling them everything and sending them the links so needless to say not 1 of my 4 kids are really talking to me. I need some help some advice something to help me combat or better still contain the damage he has done thus far. Please help..........................

I guess it goes without saying that your story just goes to show that you have to be really careful about who you get involved in a relationship with.

As far as your questions, if you are a VIP member, you can private message other VIP members of TER.  Is that proper - what he did is not proper, but he probably messaged the other reviewer asking questions as someone that might be interested in seeing you - I would be VERY surprised if he told the other reviewer he was an ex-boyfriend.  Most TER members are fairly careful about who they respond back to in those types of situations.  

If you put information out there that is available to the public (which you have done) and then two people talk about it, that is not violating your privacy.  That is two people discussing information about you that you have chosen to make available to the public.

As far as anything he did being illegal, assuming that something he did is illegal, what are you going to do - sue him for libel or slander for lying about you on an escort website or talking to someone about you on an escort website?  Good luck with that.

As far as the false review, you should be able to submit a problem report or contact TER Admin and tell them the situation and ask that it be removed.

Good luck - hopefully this is something that will blow over fairly quickly and he will move on and get out of your life.

Wow, lets see if I can figure this out, lets recap what the problem is.....

1. Gal enters into a 6 month relationship with a guy whose wife was promiscuous and had abusively sent husband graphic evidence of her activities, however relationship with guy ends badly as result of argument and near violence

2. The husband had responded to wife’s sexual graphics by posting the images on Internet and vindictively distributing them to others including her family

3. For 3 months relationship has ended and gal decides to become an escort/provider

4. Fearing his response to her plans, the ex-girlfriend who still is in communication with the ex boyfriend, tells him of she plans to practice sex for pay and he seems calm

5. However, when a review of ex-girlfriend is posted, the ex-boyfriend becomes involved and contacts the man who wrote the review to discuss the session in detail

6. The ex-girlfriend denies voracity of review and wants it taken down

7. The now escort asks, “First is that proper? Can that be done? Should that be done? Is there any rules regarding this type of thing? My privacy I feel has been violated in the worst way."

  Let me answer that by saying, once a girl becomes an escort, it is probable that she will eventually be reviewed, her or elsewhere. Private activities that are truthfully reported are legitimate even if they have unfavorable repercussions; likewise even when these activities are reported in an untruthful manner there is little the escort can but ask for the review to be removed. If the reviewer, i.e. the guy who had sex with her, is one who has a reputation for voracity, the likelihood is that the review will remain. However an escort can have her self removed permanently from the reviewing process although this may effect her income thereafter. Sadly, as for you “worst way” privacy violation, note that when you become an escort and opened your private parts to use by the public, you can have little expectation of privacy.

8. The ex boyfriend writes his own review and denigrates the escort so much that her call frequency for business decreases.

If you were running a bakery and someone did all to ruin your reputation you could sue in court and seek damages, not easy but possible, and you might win.  However, if you are in the USA, in an area where prostitution is illegal, you would not be able to pursue the case in court without dire consequences and ultimate failure. You could however ask the review to be removed and explain that it is biased and revengeful and chances are it would be removed. Also, you could discuss other Internet actions to blacken the reputation of this ex with other experienced providers. For a person who disdains his partners form having sex with anyone than himself he does not seem to be at all unaware of "the hobby" and all that naive.

9. Ex has also sent notice of your activities with links to you grown children and disrupted your relations with them.

Here again, damaging your reputation with family members by informing them of your activities, as long as the info is truthful is difficult to combat legally as here again you are involved in an illegal activity offering sex for pay. If you were not pursuing this activity and his info was not truthful you would be able to sue him very successfully. Now, if you stop your illegal activities you could seek a court order to make him stop his activities, whether you would win would depend on the judge.
In the classic world of prostitution, your persecution would be reason for having a protector who would employ illegal means to punish this person. However, to do so would coin volt you in conspiracy charges and you might well end up in prison as a result.

As they say in the Bible, “the writing was on the wall” but you were already to involved to do much about it other than extricate yourself from the relationship with a really bad guy who gives men a bad name. Once the barn door is open and the horse has run out, closing the door is of little help. I wish I could take you in my arms and dry your tears but it is too late in the game for this to be a meaningful act, although it might ease your troubled mind. You had the courage to try a new life and a new occupation, risking the police and the downcast eyes of your neighbors and society as well, and you got unfairly hit in the face by a shit-hurling bastard. In time this ass of a human will lighten up or become old news. I am only surprised that he has not informed the police of who you are and what you are doing. If you did not have family or ties to where you live I would suggest you leave town but that does not preclude this bastard from following you. You are stuck in that proverbial spot between a rock and a hard place and I really cannot offer you a legal solution although I wish someone would throw the rock at your ex. What an ass!

-- Modified on 1/25/2012 9:30:08 AM

thats alot , thats 750 a day what in gods name are you doing with all that money? i do 5 a week and manage topay for 1700 month luxury apt, and shop like crazy and am saving for boobs by one of best doctors, Whats there to complain about three a day thats a disgusting amount of cash! omg.

not every phone call gets its reward or does she mean 3 clients a day?

Really one must be very cautious about telling anyone about what you do.  It's nice that here we can talk somewhat...  and this is the only place.  
Clients should be discreet about what they put in reviews...  nothing personal about her (which she should not tell clients much anyway) and nothing about locations.  Usually reviewers will not say much, except see the review...  maybe that she really was that good or looked better than her pictures.  
I think your ex didn't do anything besides follow up on information you gave him...  

You can ask to have your reviews hidden temporarily (voluntarily delisted) for family reasons.  It will look like you stopped.  An ex-BF review violates TER rules.

You should not provide from where you sleep.
You should not use your normal cell.
You should get a "work" email address, not linked to your regular email.  
These are basic security.

Ladies change their "stage name" all the time.  TER does not care so long as it is not done to avoid BAD reviews.   Changing your stage name might help in this case.

I don't think there is anything which can be done legally.

You should check other review sites to see if there are reviews there.  Once the reviews are down...  you could lie & say it was just something you tried.  Or is it a lie if you stop?  

You could tell a "Whopper" & claim the whole business was faked by someone else.  Not sure if it would fool anyone, depending on what you've said so far.  

As I posted earlier, you should not work where you sleep.  So you'll be going to hotels...  you can travel out of your area to work.  Be aware motels with outside doors are much easier to survail by Police.  

G22107 reads

she started working at one of the legal brothels in Nevada until the heat from her obnoxious ex-husband died down.

As bad as your situation is, it's very similar to hers.  Her ex hired a detective that discovered she was working as an independent escort (this was 1998 so there were no reviews involved).  Then, he took this information to his lawyers (he had two to use against her, one for him, and another one "representing" the child) and they used it in family court to take away her visitation rights, except when supervised by a court-appionted monitor.

Since this asshole wasn't going to give up, she decided she had no choice except to go to a location where prostitution was legal.  That meant that she couldn't be criticized for an illegal activity, or for seeing clients in her apartment- the same apartment where she lived and her daughter visited.  Of course, the later is a non-issue, in reality, but it looked better to anybody on the outside.

Now, she certainly didn't advertise to the world that she was working in a legal brothel, but since she was no longer doing the same activity locally, the ex couldn't get any more evidence to use against her, and she just went underground with her activities.

These are really terrible situations to be in, and people that haven't personally witnessed the vindictiveness that someone will pursue another person might not appreciate your plight.  But I've seen what it's like when someone wants to ruin your life and it's an ugly, ugly thing.  At first, I thought her story was absurd, then I saw it for myself and she wasn't exaggerating.

While I'm not really recommending you necessarily go to Nevada to work, I am suggesting you go totally under the radar and do whatever you can to prevent anyone from getting anymore dirt on you that they can use to hurt you.  This might include a new name, new location, new phone and email, don't run any ads showing your face, ask not to be reviewed, or whatever else you can think of to throw this guy off your trail.  Best of luck to you.

GynecologistPhD1461 reads

I don't know how anyone could give you an answer, due to a long, run-on paragraph that makes this difficult and painful to even attempt to read. I don't have the patience to try to read through a 1000 sentence paragraph.  Helps to break the story up into paragraphs of 4-5 sentences that are somewhat connected. That makes the story coherent (makes it make sense) and be readable.  All my eyes see is a mass of words. I am surely not alone in this, or there wouldn't be rules we were supposed to learn in elementary school.

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