The Erotic Highway

NO have i had a bad past by seeing providers?
shudaknownbetter 1636 reads
posted

This is a secret life...  you take the details with you to the grave.  You don't tell your brother, your best friend, your buddy and certanly not a GF.  
"You had Girl Friends before".  "You thought they were attractive" (though saying so to a new GF is dangerous) perhaps "you thought so at the time".  How long they were your Girl Friends for is between you & your conscience.  
Keep your hobby life separate.  Separate hobby phone, separate secure email, do not leave tracks like use of Credit Cards or EZ Pass somewhere you should not be.  At any time you can shut the Hobby off by closing the door.  

Best wishes,
skb

Well im in my early 20's and I've had a few girlfriends in the past few years, then i went awile without a girl and found TER and started going to Vegas and seeing providers.  Now im starting to date again and get back in the swing of things and im just hoping these past several months of seeing providers doesn't mess with my head.  How do I keep all this a secret? How would I go about telling a future partner about how many women i've been with?  Will seeing providers at such a young age mess a guy up? I have no emotional problems but i just don't want to be known as a player or a dog.

And i will not see a provider if im with someone, im not asking how to cheat but just how to carry on and not feel akward about my little past?

Thanks.

TheLoveGoddess2540 reads

It's quite simple, BoyToy4U,

Ask yourself if you tell every girl you've ever been with about every single thing you've done. Do you? If so, I would cease and desist immediately; it's not just about disclosing details from your sex life, it's about disclosing anything that is strictly personal and private.

Until you know someone deeply, intimately and really do trust the person, there's no need to spill extra beans in ANY area of your life. And why should you feel "awkward" about your "little past?" What's so horrible about seeing providers? Particularly if you're a young single guy and want to have some fun. You need to get past all that negativistic socio-cultural programming, first and foremost.  Seeing providers is not something bad, evil or destructive, particularly not if you're young and horny.

"Will seeing providers at such a young age mess a guy up?" Well, it depends on what you mean by "mess a guy up." Will you have more expectations in terms of sexual skills from your civvie girlfriends? Maybe. Is that so bad? I don't think so. There are civvie chicks out there who are also highly sexual, highly inventive and reliably orgasmic. Such chicks may have had a lot of sexual experiences and may even put some providers to shame!

The issue here is not to paint your life or someone else's with one brush. What if you meet a girl who gets all turned on from hearing about you with providers? What if you meet someone who WANTS to know about every sexual experience you've ever had? Most men don't like to disclose anyway, for fear that their female partner gets turned off or jealous, so they don't say much. It's more common that the girl tries to extract all sorts of info from her guy, and he just keeps quiet in turn.  Ultimately, it depends on the girl, her sexual history, her level of experience and her preferences for baring it all or keeping some privacy and distance. If she asks you point blank (it's not really the norm that teenagers or girls in their early 20s assume that a guy has seen sex workers), then maybe you can say that "yes, you have." And pretty much leave it at that. You don't owe ANYONE a blow-by-blow description - save those for TER reviews.

Don't fixate on it, don't make it a problem, and you'll see that it won't become a big issue,

The Love Goddess

Thanks LG for the help.  I wont make it a problem and I will look back at it just as some fun times I had when I was 21, which I still am for a short time. But most likly I will see providers in the future and I wont worry about what others might think, not that im gonna tell anybody anyway.

From the OP's post details and his moniker (if one is to take everything at its face value) one assumes that he is a young fellow chronologically as he claims, but by reading the OP's reviews, he seems to be "wiser" that the average guy in his early 20's. This leads me to believe that the OP is at least a college grad with a good level of social and communicative skills. I have also deduced that the OP is not from Las Vegas but maybe from So Cal and visits Vegas for business/pleasure.

All the reviews written by the OP are reviews of providers in Vegas and for those of us who "play" in Vegas, we know that there is a certain premium associated with the ladies in Vegas. In other words, one pays more to play in Vegas (both literally & figuratively) than most cities in the U.S. with the exception of perhaps NYC (Vegas is even pricier, if not on par, with LA) Some of OP's reviews indicate that he has spent multiple hours with escorts in Vegas and their activities are not merely confined to the bedroom and they expanded to a couple of threesomes, dinner dates plus some strip club/night club visits! Now, this information is all there in the OP's reviews and my objective is not to be too intrusive, but I am wondering as to whether the OP's apparent "guilt" and the need to spill the beans (he said that he is now seeing civvies) is more than what meets the eyes?

Knowing of Vegas escorts who are mostly consummate "pros" (not using this word in any derogatory manner, but referring to their more "elevated" status in the escort business) and the fact that the OP seems to have booked some of his dates through an agency, I very much doubt that the ladies have given him any kind of off-the-clock time based on his mere youth or let's say theoretically good looks. I know of some of these ladies and I can categorically vouch that some of them whom I know of are at least easily 5-10 years older that their TER age. This OP's story is more fascinating that what meets my eyes!

In closing, I hope that I am not hijacking this thread with my curiosity but what resonated with me personally about this story is this: While I was in my mid-20's, I had suffered from the vice of gambling excessively and having had access to a lot more funds (family resources) than your usual 20 year old, I was constantly acting out because I dared not tell the truth to anyone who really and genuinely cared about me (family members), but rather exposed myself and my secrets to perfect strangers who did not give a crap about me and in the process took enormous advantages of me, just because I had to spill the proverbial beans to someone to confess my "sins"...

Thanks for the positive comments.  It feels good to be known as "wiser" than the average guy in his early 20's. Also i've never been to college. Every lady has mentioned that im more mature than most my age, im not saying that they see many guys my age but they just know.  Your right, I dont live in Vegas but i visit for pleasure. No im not from Cal, but live in the big sky state.  Some of the ladies do give me off the clock time but it's more likly to happen with one's closer to my own age. Anyways im just having some fun before i have to settle down.

Then you must have had a heck of an education in the college of life, rather than a formal college education. Let us just say that it does not seem that you have lived a very sheltered life ;) In any case, if you've got "it", then use it and flaunt it. You are not in a committed relationship, so like you said, just have your fun and be smart about it :)

I held off having sex (involunarily) until I was 23, and I think that screwed me up more than having sex would have with escorts (Which I started out with right around then.)

madiba512445 reads

The most important thing is not how a potential future partner might think about it, but what you think about it.

I'm telling you flat out that there is nothing "wrong" with what you are doing.  But you need to understand that yourself.

TheApe1996 reads

My opinion on this is that if most of us knew about this hobby in our 20s we probably would have been more driven to make good money at an earlier age and we would have wasted less time chasing game playing women who would take up much of our time and money and then control the sexual frequency.   The young man is ahead of the game and will actually have a huge mental advantage over the civilian women that he will date over the next few years.

I agree with TheApe, I'm in my late thirties and before I found TER & Eros I would cheat on my wife because of lack of sex drive.  I would find myself getting frustrated and start an affair.  I always got along with my spouse except for the sex but it would cause me to have dislike for her because I felt like she didn't care about all that I was doing and providing for her.

Once I found Eros & TER I was like a little kid in a candy store.  If there is no sex drive at home or if the sex is like a dead fish then I just pick a new provider and have some fun and when I'm done I go home.  Another thing that it did for me is when an attractive woman tries to give you attitude like her s#*t don't stink, you can look right through her and know that you banged more "10's" that are way better than her.  You don't get all hot and bothered trying to chase that.

shudaknownbetter1637 reads

This is a secret life...  you take the details with you to the grave.  You don't tell your brother, your best friend, your buddy and certanly not a GF.  
"You had Girl Friends before".  "You thought they were attractive" (though saying so to a new GF is dangerous) perhaps "you thought so at the time".  How long they were your Girl Friends for is between you & your conscience.  
Keep your hobby life separate.  Separate hobby phone, separate secure email, do not leave tracks like use of Credit Cards or EZ Pass somewhere you should not be.  At any time you can shut the Hobby off by closing the door.  

Best wishes,
skb

A girlfriend can become an ex-girlfriend....a bitter ex who twitters and posts on Facebook about "my scumbag ex-boyfriend screwed hookers before me."  Charlie Sheen maybe a likeable hobbyist, but the general public considers the rest of us as diseased horndogs.

When civvies ask me about my current past relationships, I say my sex-life been virtually nonexistent.  If they push and say you must  of had sex this past year, I say the only sex I had this year was internet porn.

It never happened....

I'm also (just still) in my 20's and recently started the hobby. I don't know how it will effect future relationships but it has helped me make the decision to get out of the strained one that I'm currently in. I've realized how much better sex can be and have also been able to talk through issues with some providers that have opened my eyes to my other possibilities. I'm young, not unattractive and seeing other women - if only in an artificial environment - has provided me with a broader perspective. That's never a bad thing.

sk04012030 reads

So nice to see a post like this.  I'm a former hobbyist, who was in the same boat as you once.  I usually only read this part of the site b/c it's very amusing to see the questions and LG's responses.  Here's my advice.  I think it's actually a good thing to start hobbying younger for a few reasons.  I started seeing escorts at 21 and stopped a few years back.  My experiences were great.  I started during college and whenever I had some extra cash there was nothing more fun than seeing an escort.  Seeing providers in your early 20s is fun b/c of where you are in life.  You are young, hopefully unattached, and free of much of the baggage we pick up.  You're hopefully not in the hobby b/c you're in a bad, sexless relationship.  Sex, sex, & more sex was on my mind at that age, so no better way than doing it in a controlled environment with an escort who can teach me a few things.

Use these escorts as a tool to gain experience in pleasing a woman and actually communicate with them on a level you can't in normal life.  When you know you're going to have sex and it's a business transaction, this takes a ton of pressure off of a man.  Rather than fall for these girls, talk to them to find out what they like in a man, what excites them, and the like.  That's what I did b/c I realized that these escorts were just like every girl I wanted to pick up.  Most guys on here have a type they think they can't get in real life, so they pay for it.  Really they should think, I like hot, tall models, so while I'm paying for this girl, it's a good opportunity to pick her mind to find out what she may have in common with other hot, tall models I want.  I found the experiences with escorts appealing for this reason alone.  It's a great confidence boost that let me go on and pick up women.  In fact, I had so many experiences that I was confident in myself to talk to any girl and also stimulate her both in & out of bed.  

The best part about escorting earlier in life is that I found the grass isn't greener and you won't be a player unless you act like one.  Sex may feel good and alleviate stress, but it can't be your sole means of escape from a bad relationship.  The best way to stop a bad relationship is to date for a long time before committing fully.  You may lose a good girl, but trust me there are 1000s out there.  Realize being single is fun, so enjoy it.  As a man, you'll have ample time to find a great SO and sow your oats as well.  Sexist yes, but true nonetheless.  

Now, here's the bad part.  Don't tell anyone you know or your future GF/Wife.  Most women don't understand.  If you find that as life goes on you really need a partner who is into a ton of sex or swinging or whatever, then possibly open up the conversation about getting a provider for the both of you.  However, if you read the constant barrage of guys living a double life on here, realize such a partner is very hard to find, so it's better to protect yourself by keeping this in your past.  Pre paid cell.  Separate Gmail w/ an odd smashing of letters/numbers that has nothing to do with your life.  Keep the phone somewhere no one will find it & the battery separate as well.  Get a car charger & talk in the car only.  No txt ever, if possible.  Rules to live by to not get caught by a GF, Wife, or Divorce Lawyer.  A guilty conscience, I have no advice for.  That's you're issue which you need to deal with.  Therapy is expensive, confession is free.  Choose one if you feel shame for your actions.  Really as long as you aren't hurting anyone, you should be fine, but to each their own.  Trust me, as you get older, you learn to care more about life experiences than being judged by others.

I know this is long, but I'm just happy i could give my .02 cents on something here as I don't relate to most of the older gentlemen who came into the hobby later in life.  Not judging on the guys who harp on ATFs, sexless marriages, or sexual dysfunctions; just wanted to let a young guy know that seeing a hooker in your 20s doesn't mean you're f'd up the rest of your life.  Realize you're doing this for the sex and the fun of it.  You will be a totally different person in 5, 10, and 20 years from now, so no reason to let this part of your past bring you down.  Just know that you can use such experiences as a positive confidence booster.

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