I have always found that the best part of a sexual sexcapade is the bringing my partner to climax. I love the energy and feeling I get knowing that for a brief encounter I provided a feeling of extasy. Does that make me a sex addict? I know that in past relationships, sexual compatability is essential and a must for a relationship tp grow. I would like to know what your thoughts are on this subject...
Feel the same. I want my partner to come first and watch the great feeling as it happens
Elle, I don't think you are a sex addict. I think you enjoy sex.There is a difference. I attached a link to a detailed definition of Sexual Addition. It is very interesting.
One doctor defined it as follows:
Compulsivity: This is the loss of the ability to choose freely whether to stop or continue a behavior.
Continuation despite consequences: When addicts take their addiction too far, it can cause negative effects in their lives. They may start withdrawing from family life to pursue sexual activity. This withdrawal may cause them to neglect their children or cause their partners to leave them. Addicts risk money, marriage, family and career in order to satisfy their sexual desires. Despite all of these consequences, they continue indulging in excessive sexual activity.
Obsession: This is when people cannot help themselves from thinking a particular thought. Sex addicts spend whole days consumed by sexual thoughts. They develop elaborate fantasies, find new ways of obtaining sex and mentally revisit past experiences. Because their minds are so preoccupied by these thoughts, other areas of their lives that they could be thinking about are neglected.
Personally, I think about sex often, several times a day. In this profession, we are fortunate because sex is business and pleasure. We get a double dose. There is nothing wrong with that. I enjoy making my partner erect and climax. There is just something empowering about that. I also enjoy pleasuring myself. There are times throughout the day I may see something or think of something and become extremely aroused. I am very visual and have an vivid imagination. Also, I go through phases. Sometimes I am really into porn and will love to watch videos. Sometimes I think about certain pleasures. Sometimes the wind will blow a certain way...lol...
As with anything in life, do it for the best of it, do not let it get the best of you. If it starts to interfere with other areas of your life, then maybe it is a problem and you are addicted. As long as you have the power to control your compulsivity, there is nothing to worry about.
You might as well face it your addicted to sex...enjoy!
Toni provides an excellent defination and explanation of an addict.
In short to respond to Elle's thread, one who is a sexual addict, sexual activity in thought and/or carrying out the sexual pleasure(s) dominates/controls a person.
I soo agree on the difference......
Ever since I lost my virginity...dang that seems like along time ago...I have come to realize that I just love sex and the feeling of it all.
As we get older you go through many changes in life that allows each of us to focus on what part of our lives we will learn from and grow. I have become soo much more in tuned to my bodies likes and dislikes. Just like you Toni I am a very visual woman and not alot of women are like that!!
It brings soo much more joy when you can tell other's what you enjoy and what you don't like. Personally, my #1 thing is to please and I have always been that way. I just love looking at my partner in the eyes and seeing the ecstasy and expression on the face of my partner. Knowing how much pleasure I am giving to him is just beyond the best erotic feeling ever!!!
I was in a situation last night with friends and a very special friend where he was behind me and 3 other woman joined in for a major sandwich!!! Man I have to tell the senses were just a going...I would have taken all 3 of them women right then and there!!! Talk about being visual...all the guys in the place were just swarming around all of us....it came close to being an orgy...oh yummy...the conclusion of the evening was just a wonderful mixture of true pleasure and wetness beyond anything you can imagine!!!
So am I a sex addict...maybe, maybe not, but I sure as hell enjoy it and have no intentions on stopping now!!!
The expense is damnable, the position ridiculous, the pleasure fleeting.
yes i can be doing all days!!!!! during the whole week!! Yes Im addicted!!!! I dont have a problem, I cant take it manny times,everywhere.....
I know a lot about addiction, and Toni's post was very informative and right on (as usual).
Your post is very interesting because you mention the rush you get from bringing you partner to climax, rather than getting yourself off. I agree that being able to please your partner to the point of release is empowering. Many moons ago when I first started having sex it was all about me. Soon after I learned that I was going to get mine regardless, so I began concentrating on my partner. It didn't take long to realize that the more I pleased my partner, the better the sex got. At this time I enjoy giving as much as receiving. Relating this to the hobby, one of the things I look for in a review is how responsive a lady is. Sure I like to see that her giving skills are good, but I also want to know that she is willing to let go when I'm giving.
Finally, sexual compatability is very important in a relationship. When you get into LTR's it's a little trickier. You may start out sexually compatable, but over the years that often changes. I can tell you from experience that this is a very difficult and complex issue. When your partner no longer is interested in giving, and is only interested in receiving (and infrequently at that), it can be huge bummer. Without babbling further, I'll end it with this...thank god for the hobby!!
Well to me sex addiction means you need it for comfort and to releive stress like a drug. Always thinking about your next fix. If you're addicted, sex is always in your thoughts. Never satiated.. you get off, but then you cant wait to have it again.
Are we oppressed as a society...personally I think we are. men and women are sexual beings by nature there are no and's, if's or buts. You are totally healthy and so is the rest of us. Women have been confused as to what our roles are in society we have been led down a certain path in the 70's and because of STD's we are now considered unhealthy in our natural God given desires.. the question remains, are we fulfilling our role as men and women or are we letting society dictate who we are. I see no problem with sex in fact if we deny ourselves our pleasure then we get sick emotionally, physically and mentally. That is the problem which is why this hobby was created in the first place. we are forced underground because of the very change in society and relationships suffer because of it. we also as women joined the work force and that made things expensive. we no longer keep our men happy and bear their children and focus on motherhood. Who is the authority as to what is healthy for all of us. It is society's way of placing labels. That is the reason we are all here....just my two cents....
I love having sex with lovely ladies, and thus far, I, for the most part, have been very happy with the ladies I have chosen. Many are on my review list, and there are some I could not review, but trust me, they were fun, and have repeated with many of the wonderful ones I have had the pleasure to visit. Have no plans on stopping either.
I would not consider myself a sex addict, but a pleasure consultant. Sex is one of the most natural things that two human beings can enjoy with each other. In many other parts of the world, it is not made out to be such a taboo as it is in the United States. Safe, consensual, passionate, sizzling hot...I can go on and on. Who am I kidding, LOL! I have recently told a guy friend that men have sports and my favorite sport is Sex.