I am 57, very trim (5'7"/140#) and a good 10+ years younger than my chronologic age by all accounts. I've got a sugardaddy relationship, now of about 1 1/2 years, with a friendly 46 year old provider. I get a good strong erection easily, usually come a little sooner than I like the first time, then have a more leisurely second round. I am keenly aware that sex is probably more psychological than physical. Several times lately, in the middle of a good healthy fuck, on the second go round, I have lost my erection without any real reason. This last time, my partner had a real good thorough orgasm, and it was like I had a simultaneous let down... like I was subconsciously empathetic. And it would have been really nice to keep rolling. What do you think? Perhaps I'm missing some of the subtleties of intimacy because my provider tends to get wrapped up in her getting off more than helping me out a little more... that could be a facet of this.
deo, don't get in your head (no pun intended) about that. The More you think about it, the more it WILL happen. Plus, regardless or your health status, 57 is not 47 or 37 and definately not 27, the body will slow down with or without your brain. We like to think we can perform like studs forever and whenever, but it just isn't going to happen.
Strickly from a medical stand point though, have your doctor check out your heart. Hidden problems arise long before you notice them. And of coarse regular prostate exam...every single man alive will get prostate hypertrophy if he lives long enough...you may die long before that but it is a genetic fact.
But seriously folks....
I'm the same age as you, and what you wrote almost describes my situation to a T.
When that happens I take a breather for about a half hour, have some water, we chat and then start up again (if time to).
It usually works well the second time.
I've spoken to my doctor about it and asked if Viagra is that answer. He said no, as long as I've got no problem with the first one. It's just age. (He's also the same age as us.)
i am not as good as I once was. But I am good ONCE as I ever was!
Dear deolehipsta,
What do I think? I think you should:
a) get a prescription for an ED med to see if it will help
or
b) get with another provider to see if it makes any difference.
These two interventions will address either the physical or the psychological aspect of your erectile issue. You may be 57 and "a good deal younger than your chronological age," but that still doesn't take into account that aging is a slow and very gradual process. One of these days you're just not going to have the raging boner of yore, so to speak - regardless of what your cardiac stress test or other gerontological dimensions may indicate. The flagging in the second round would certainly indicate that age has something to do with it.
As to the psychological factor - any kind of worrying about your performance will conspire to tweak the reckless abandon needed to copulate with gusto. The point I'm making is that if you want the provider to "help you out a little more," then you're handing away your own powers to get excited and to get off. Think back to when you were about 20 or so - did you really need anyone else's help to blast off? Probably not. Some of the best and most intense sex is reportedly when individuals get into their own universe and fuck with nary a thought of what's actually going on. Maybe that's what's happening with your provider and maybe that's why she's having such great orgasms? Good sex is often 'selfish sex.' Particularly for women, this is key, since many women have genuine difficulties in orgasming and focusing on their own pleasures.
Now, if you have provider fatigue and need some variety, then switch a couple of times to stimulate the brain in its excited reaction to newness. Try it - the results may surprise you.
Forget about empathy - get a little selfish,
The Love Goddess
I'm a big fan of herbal supplements and have been using them the last 4 months.
I used to go limp at the first sign of the cover... sometimes I'd get in and go limp within a few strokes ... not anymore, maintain erection through multiple positions... also never had a second pop in the last 5 or 6 years, now every time!!!
I'm 55... PM me for info.
May I respectibly suggest that it's psychological. If you go limp at the sight of the cover or upon penetration, it's all in your mind. No supplement is going to help that. Most likely, you have experienced what's known as the "placebo effect."
sure - the first sign of a cover is psychological... but not the second pops via BJ - had a gal try for 3 hours to pop me a 2nd time a couple of years ago - no dice...
even just a few months ago - never... now, it's all the time... in fact, my current fav says she's going to get a 3rd out of me next time...
...when I use viagra the same thing happens, but the herbal?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=58Utb1R89uc
can you tame the lion?
while the loss of the erection might indeed be psychological to begin with, the ability to recover quickly or maintain a more robust erection that doesnt fade so quickly might indeed be reflective of the supplement. may or may not be placebo but as he mentioned, the other performance issues are certianly not do ya think?
Why couldn't the ability to recover an erection also be psychological? If you believe you can't, you won't. If you believe that some supplement will work, it often does. I'm not saying that's definitely the case in this specific instance, but as you say, it may or may not.
since I'm an avid nutrition nut... and study genetics and cellular biology... I've done plenty of experimenting... so not to damage your placebo theory... but there have been some days where I am just working on typical stuff and have had to whack off 4 times in one day - I've never done that! In my younger days, I may have whacked it twice in a day just to know I could... but 4 times at age 55... guess all that gene expression and single nucleotide polymorphisms can be quite erotic... lol
I'm 55 too, and it would take a miracle to get me to get off 4 times in one day...come to think of it, even 3 times in one day would make me think hell froze over.
now I need to make a shit load of money to hobby 4 or 5 times a week... LOL