This is fantastic.
I would add this as a permanent addition to this community.
Heck - why not get together, print out several million copies and drop it over every major metropolitan area in the country.
Iceman - you have gift.
12. Be consistent: For service, you will have your own limits and decide what level of service to provide. My main point would be to be as consistent as possible in your service from client to client. (This fits in with 7. Have a routine.) It is frustrating for a client to read a review that you do x, but then have a session and find that you won't. I am aware that some clients may be so offensive (halitosis, BO, obesity etc.) that you just don't have the heart (or stomach) for it, but in general, the more consistent you can manage to be with service, the better. Again, it's a matter of the client not wanting to be surprised negatively. This is a touchy issue, I realize, and many providers don't like explicit reviews because they like to have the freedom to choose what to do and with whom. They dislike having many expectations being set in that department. I respect that need, but remember, there is also a strong need for clients to have reviews to understand what they are receiving for their hard-earned dollars, it's the only way we can avoid rip-offs, and improve our odds.
13. Tips for Tips: Tips are at his discretion. If you feel that you would like to have a "tiered" pricing approach, with different prices for different services, be clear about this upfront. Clients will avoid you if they don't have a good sense of what you charge for various services, again, this goes hand in hand with 12. Be consistent in service and pricing.
14. Respond to praise/criticism with class: You will meet many different men who have different tastes and desires. You may develop a rapport with some, who may become regulars and true friends, but for others, the vibe may not be there. Be kind and courteous to all, regardless of how they review you, and realize that a negative review is only one client's opinion of you. Don't scramble to defend yourself, or try to put down the reviewer, this only reflects poorly on you, and certainly won't change his mind. Remember that the more reviews you have, the more accurate a picture your clients will have of you, and the more satisified they will be with you as a provider. If you are an excellent provider, the law of averages will work in your favor, and the review record will reflect it. Even if a client doesn't consider you their favorite provider, they cannot help but be satisfied if your actual L/A/S matches your reviews. Remember there will always be those pricks who are never satisfied (me) as well as stalkers who profess their undying love to you and ask you to marry them daily. Take both with a grain of salt.
15. Looks, age, smoking, tats, fitness: I consider these things to be fixed. It takes a level of effort to change these that is extremely difficult for anyone to do, provider or not. Unless you go under the knife, invent time travel, have extreme willpower, use laser removal, or become a Tai Bo maniac... these are a part of who you are. Don't sweat them. Looks are only one factor in the equation. Some providers are incredible looking, but are mechanical and uninspired from a service perspective. Others are plain, yet know how to exquisitely tease and please a man until he is on his knees begging for her body. Rarely do you see a direct correlation between model looks and success as a provider. The others things, age, tats, smoking, are rarely show stoppers. They are only show stoppers if he is expecting something else!! Don't try to hide or obscure these traits. Be upfront about who you are, even if you think some people may not become clients because of it. Over the long run, this will pay dividends.
16. Use the entire session: He has paid for the full session time, and you should expect to spend the full time with him. Again, if you have a routine, you'll be prepared with an alternative activity if he gets his rocks off in 4 minutes. Suggest a backrub, or just caress him, or ask if he'd like hot bath or shower with you, again, be creative, and have a plan. Make it clear that you are there for him, don't jump up and get dressed, unless it's clear that he is ready to leave. I understand that multiple pops are another touchy issue, and if you don't feel comfortable with more than one attempt, be open about it and tell him. While he might not be overjoyed, he'll be glad to know how you feel, rather than waiting for something that is never going to come, so to speak.
To conclude, in almost every case the underlying theme is that the client will respond positively if he feels you are responsive and making a good-faith effort in showing him an erotic, passionate, sensual time. Of course, YMMV, and hobbiests will vary in whether or not any/all of these items are important to them. But if you can do these right, you will already be ahead of 90% of the providers out there.
Have fun, stay safe, and leave the lights ON!!
Iceman
This is fantastic.
I would add this as a permanent addition to this community.
Heck - why not get together, print out several million copies and drop it over every major metropolitan area in the country.
Iceman - you have gift.
Excellent advice. I would add a couple comments:
1. Personal Hygiene- so obvious it goes without saying (but, hey, they left the Bill of Rights off the Constitution for the same reason!). For both client and provider alike, nothing can put a damper on the festivities faster than unpleasant odors. This is more an issuse for some of the agency girls that seem to schedule their days like a UPS driver does his deliveries. If you've had a long day, get caught in traffic, whatever, it's always best to just take a moment to be clean. Whether client or provider, it's always better to just ask if it's OK to hop in the shower before you get started. A provider can easily make it part of the fun by simply saying "Do you want to help me?" If you're worried about hair or make-up, you can still freshen-up first in other ways. Guys, the same goes for you if you didn't have time to go home first, etc. The few minutes you lose up front will be long forgotten when you are rewarded with a more enthusiastic provider.
I once dated a provider who was meticulous about her appearance, but one time was running late for our date. Later that night when I was dining at the Y I got a mouthful of the most horrible tasting chemicals I'd ever imagined. At first she couldn't figure it out but got a wash cloth and cleaned up. No change. Finally, she rememberd she'd had a client who used a condom with spermicide! What really put me off was the fact that if I hadn't tasted the chemicals, she would have let me go to it w/o having cleaned up after the previous occupant. Just because you're using a condom doesn't mean you're clean! Regardless of the circumstances, both parties deserve the respect of cleanliness. This one experience put an element of doubt in the back of my mind that diminished my enjoyment in the future.
2. Male sexual response changes significantly with age. Some younger providers in their early 20's who are used to only dating men in their age group are unaware of the changes in male sexual response when they start seeing middle-aged or older clients. They expect guys to be ready to go before the cloths hit the floor and are impatient if it takes longer because they see it as more work or time required on their part. But as the experienced ladies know, male arousal slows down with age and can vary greatly.
There is both a mental and a physical element to this change in response. First off, by the time you're in your 40's or 50's, you've seen enough pretty women nude that it takes more than just glimpse of breasts or a wiggle of the hips to achieve arousal. It's not that we don't enjoy the view just as much, it's just that we're not seeing it for the first time either so we don't automatically get an erection. You have to allow more time with foreplay to let things build, both in our minds as well as our pants.
Second, there are actual physical changes that occur with age that can cause the time it takes for an erection to be achieved to increase. More physical stimulation may be required over a longer period of time. This can result from a combination of reduced sensation in the penis as well as lower blood flow to produce an erection. There is no bigger turn-off than a woman saying in an impatient tone of voice "Can't you hurry up a little" or "Aren't you ready yet?" It's a real mood killer. Similarly, the time to orgasm may be increased, especially with condoms which make many mature men unable to feel the stimulation from contacting the walls of the vagina. If things are running long, use two fingers to increase friction, or offer to finish orally. Whatever you do, don't act frustrated or impatient or it will ruin the client's enjoyment and have the opposite effect of what is desired.
Most of the experienced providers know this already, but some of the women with MP, agency, or LPIN (Nevada brothels) backgrounds tend to have an assembly line mentality of maximizing through-put in the minimum amount of time. This just guarantees you'll never get any repeat business, or the safety and security that it can provide.
3. Directionally challenged providers. I don't know what it is about women in this activity, but many seem to have difficulty with maps and directions. If you're doing outcall, allow yourself enough time to find out where you are going and to get clear directions. And in cities like LA, allow enough time for traffic. There is no greater turn-off than getting calls every half hour saying you'll be another 45 minutes late. I've had several experiences where it took 2-3 hours after the appointed time before the provider actually arrived. Not only does this make the provider feel rushed, but she also has to face a client that is angry, or at least way past being in the mood for fun. This sort of lax scheduling can also create other problems for clients as you can imagine.
-- Modified on 6/18/2001 1:04:26 PM
-- Modified on 6/18/2001 1:20:14 PM