How do you guys and gals feel about a younger provider escorting an older client in public, especially when open affection is expected? I'm 25, demure and very conservatively dressed, so don't invite attention myself pretty woman style! But I feel awkward being "as a couple" in public with men who are old enough to be my father, or in some case Granpops. I'm always aware of the looks we encounter and it cheapens the whole thing. It seems obvious to other people that the girl is a w**re, so is the fact that everyone presumes he's paying for it not embarrassing to the client? Please let me know what you think.
-- Modified on 4/4/2006 10:11:15 AM
To follow your logic if I see a young gal walking with someone who can be assumed to be her dad or grandpa, do I have to conclude that she's a w*ore?
May I suggest that you look inward why you feel the way you do.
ok, point taken. I've modified my question.
I will be 50 this May but I look like I am in my 30's. My public dates are with men my age and upwards to the 70's. I have also had a few public dates with guys in their late 20's to early 30's. I never feel like I look like a wh**e. I never feel like a wh**r..I love being sexy..I love the flirtation and the awesome conversations. I am VERY comfortable with my sensuality and my person..Soooooo I always have an incredible time. When you are on a date in public your focus shaould be on your date..Don't worry about those around you..Enjoy the moments together..
Kisses
SexyC
I happen to agree with providerp. I am old enough to be her father and wouldn't want to embarass myself or her by having a 'public' date. That's why I have to laugh every time I see 'Dinner Date' listed on a provider's menu of services, especially the ones who advertise themselves as 'college cuties'.
Funny thing, the last time I was in NYC, my SO & I were having drinks in the Waldorf-Astoria bar and she commented about how many hookers were in the bar. Now, I hadn't noticed anything but when I looked around I couldn't help but notice all the great-looking women with sub-par and/or significantly older guys. Women have a much better eye for this I guess
"especially when open affection is expected." As far as I'm concerned, an older man out in public with a much younger woman should be particularly conscious NOT to display affection openly. It looks stupid, in addition to being embarrassing. I'm an older guy who has been out to dinner with younger women on many occasions, and displaying open affection in public is something I would NEVER do. There's always enough time to display plenty of affection later IN PRIVATE. Just my opinion.
Heck, I married someone younger than me, as did my dad. That was not the source of our marital problems however. I have also been on civie dates with younger, and some women my age who look about 20 years younger. I have also dated a stripper who is more than half my age.... I have also been in the presence, in public, with excorts who, to be honest range in ages from 20's to late 40's, in a one-on-on settings and with a group setting (TER Gettogether). I am not bragging, just setting the stage for my reply.
I really don't care. I used to escort my mom around town, and she always joked that perhaps others would look at us and wonder, how did that older woman attract that young man! Mom, I thank you for implanting the fact that if the two people in question are not bothering anyone, having a good time and in general not a problem, why should it be anyone's business. I should also add that I have introduced some of my friends to some of the hotter ladies.... it did not cause a problem... maybe because of the way I and the lady handled the situation.
I, sometimes,have traveled for work with younger and very attractive women... same question...! Same answer.
When I see an older dude out with a hot young chick, I assume nothing UNLESS - and here is the biggie.... he is unkept, messy, vulgar, dirty, and sloppy.... and in that case, I do assume that there is more than meets the eye... some of it very sinister and feel sorry for the lady in question. but that is about all.
Oh, and for the record, when I take my kids out, lots of folks assume that they are my grandkids. they are not. but hey, my ex is still knockin em out in her late 40s! go figure.
I would be very proud to "escort" some of the ladies on this board out in public. (pun very intended) To date, in this hobby, I have met one, count em, one woman that I would not do that with. Why? She made me feel bad about myself. but why would I not be ashamed.... let me tell you a little about the women I have met in this hobby...
by and large, they are
sensitive, - many of them giving to charities, doing volunteer work and helping others.
Educated - I know - many of my "brothers" on this board have reservations about the educational levels of the ladies, I do not. I have seen the resumes, I have quizzed them to determine if indeed they have a degree or not... I have found that if they claim to have a degree- they do.
Intelligent - many of the ladies in this are very intelligent - hey, they also have people skills! Never been disappointed with the vast majority - they make me think before I talk to them.... and that ain't bad.
Funny - ever talk Mikkithemilf!? she is a riot!
Who would not want to be seen in public with people like this!?
Yea, if you dress well, act well for the most part - no one cares...
my only true ackward moment? one night, the lady I was with hinted that she was curious about some of the dining places in my town... and that she was hungry.... Actually she kept saying "I'm hungry" - after our session - she said that again... so I asked, "would you like to join me for dinner?" Immediately she agreed. But then she looked at me and said that she only had jeans to wear... as I was in biz casual, and not too far off the jean wear... I said ok - lets go.... a really wonderful evening took place... she has a spot in my heart for that evening - and NOONE gave us a second glance. Why did I feel ackward? at the end of the very sweet evening, I walked her back to her hotel, there was the briefest of moments when I forgot that this was not a "Real Date" - and I really did a stupid thing. I shook her hand... I saw the look on her face and Immediately realized the terrible mistake.... she too had had a good time, and would have liked a sweet kiss goodnight... wow! Was I ever sorry about that!
At a TER meet and greet - the only stares that we got were from two tables (of all women) who looked bored! go figure.....!!! hope this helps... just one persons perspective....
-- Modified on 4/4/2006 11:09:00 AM
-- Modified on 4/4/2006 11:21:03 AM
You are pretty amusing too...
If you're not comfortable with it, don't do it. May require some extra screening once you discover what the client wants (i.e. asking his age).
The statement "open affection is expected" makes me think the man is either really stupid or trying to draw attention to boost his ego. He is not embarrassed at all, but he should be. I personally do not engage in public displays of affection because I have more self respect than that, regardless of the age of lady who is accompanying me. This guy sounds like a cheap thrill clown
ProviderP: Think you need to re-evaluate your service menu, or else have a serious discussion with your clients before you venture out as to what is and is not acceptable. I do not blame you for being embarrassed, but if you are offering this service and the client says yes, you are the one who has to provide the fantasy paid for and put your personal feelings aside. This menu option may not be what is best for you.
I can certainly understand your being uncomfortable about it. I think the main thing is feeling good about yourself and not worrying about what anyone else thinks. If not, then set the boundaries right away with a client before the date. Then, there's no confusion on his part or your's. If it makes you feel better, dress conservatively during the dinner part of your date, and tell him he's in for a surprise back at the hotel. Wink!
Hugs,
Ciara
You do not look old to me! actually you look quite hot!
-- Modified on 4/5/2006 7:12:02 AM
I'd feel very good about myself if you were on my arm.
I too must agree with everyone else... civie or escort - does not matter... as I stated in my previous post, how the people conduct themselves is more what draws attention than "how they look"
If this guy reaches over and grops you in public, then he is an idiot...
In the previous post, in all the excursions, when out with a lady, she is treated exactly as that! No exceptions, no excuses.
Dinner with a lady out is a treat for me! and I enjoy hearing what the ladies have to say... my ATF and I talk about a lot of things together, some which probably make us sound like an old married couple! lol!!!!
married couples don't have scintilating conversations. That just sit, eat and stare. Ocassionally she reminds him he has a dentist appt. on Thursday. Been there, done that.
I usually enjoy taking my ATF's out to dinner after the bedroom time. We both work up quite the appetite.
Only a varool would grope someone in public, but a hug and quick kiss at the end of the evening is innocent enough.
And if someone is bothered, screw them and their dog. We got a life to live here, Cha-Cha.
before our divorce, the ex and I went out to dinner... it was supposed to be a romantic evening.. and before we left the house, we made an agreement to not talk about the kids....
We said nothing for 2 straight hours!
Sooo I guess my dinners with my ATF were not like that! we actually had intelligent coversations! Again you have a bullseye!
I did not check through all the replies, so this might have already been said, but I like trophy dates and I don't might if people think I'm dating my daughter. I dated a stripper once in California that had a Daddy's Girl tattoo on her back - visible to the public. I've also had ladies address me as Daddy, Pops, etc...usually on their own violition. Nothing wrong with a little faux incest.
Costa Rica!
This is not a flip answer. I'm hoping you can garner some help from cultural differences.
Yes, prostitution is legal in Costa Rica. Yes, there is very little enforcement of child support decrees in Costa Rica because the men rarely have jobs long enough to make payment. Yes, average annual salary for a Costa Rican is $3900 US. Yes, many Costa Rican men have two families and girl friends on the side. Yes, being macho with the little head is very important to the Costa Rican men.
Which brings me, a 60 year old American, to tell you why I love to go to Costa Rica. 18 year old girls smile and flirt with me. To them I could be all the maturity, security, love, and the answer to their life and the life of their families.
This story, in one fashion or another, happens all the time. I'm in a supermarket and I'm looking for my last item: a notebook. I approached a cute 18 year old female clerk who didn't understand english and I didn't know the spanish. Immediately you switch to charades. I pretend I am writing on my hand and keep pointing to my hand. A puzzeled look changes and Si! She went down the aisle and reached in behind the potato chips. She came back with her address book, page open, Si, pointing to an open space. I wrote in my address and telephone number and said gracias. No, mi gracias and she kissed me on the lips!
I think you are embarressed because everything you have said is true about our culture. People do think you are a w**re, etc. I think the advice above is reasonable: Either take it off the menu (until you know your client) or don't care what other people think and provide the fantasy. Maybe if you get a one week gig for $15,000 it will change your mind about what other people think. I do what I have to do! I kiss 18 year olds!
in public, I have a delightful conversation with the client and I may give pecks on the cheek or forehead as I am european looking. Older men have more to talk about whereas younger men act like they are the scolded boy in the principal's office and then comment that I did all the talking.
I do the dinner date to get rid of first time nerves as men have to be in the right train of thought for sex
Nah, people are always going to look.
If your date was of a diferent race, people would look.
If your date was far more or far less educated than you, people would look.
Today, who's to say what does and does not constiute a couple? I bet only a very few imagine it's a commercial/sexual relationship. most probably assume the traditional steretype that you're a golddigger.
Unless you provide in a very small town, I don't think this ought to be something to worry endlesly about.
Remember, it's only a job, you're an actress, you're playing a role, and you have an audience of one.
Good luck.
allow herself to be seen with me in public.
Smithers, get this young ladies contact information and forward my references, post haste!
LOL
I am in later middle age and very much enjoy public dates, and although I admit to having a preference to ladies over thirty, it is clear your concern would still apply. The few ladies I have dined with have been very professional and great companions. This is part of the fantasy life we choose. To all the other gentlemen like myself, I have found it best to ask the lady if she is ok with a public engagement.
Feels to me like two different answers are required here:
1) It is a sad comment on the world if I can't take my daughter, goddaughter or nieces out to lunch or dinner without them be thought of as w****s. And yes we are an affectionate family.
2) Some of the nicest dates I have had in recent years were with providers - often, but not always, purely social. It's a delight to go out to dinner or theater with a charming companion and say goodnight afterwards with no drama and no worries (betraying a down under influence.
Guess my body line don't worry about what people think, just enjoy yourself in an appropriate (rave vs. dinner at the Ritz) and dignified manner (especially the Ritz)
Milehigh50
When I was a road warrior, I would travel with female co-workers who were either younger or older than me. Some were very good looking. Being of a different race, I would get stares from people but didn't give a shit because the lady and I knew our situation and we needed to eat. When I take a provider to dinner, I just act as if she was a co-worker. I have learned to overcome any anxiety because people will always think what they want, and in the long run as everyone has already stated in the thread, just enjoy the person you are with.