What is your biggest reason for seeing providers? Variety in bed or because your significant other doesn’t put out enough? Maybe her looks changed over the years? I know keeping things new, exciting and having a good variety is important. However... if your wife did all of this on the regular, would you still see providers? Thanks guys. 
-- Modified on 12/7/2017 5:56:19 AM
I made a decision to start seeing providers again after about 5 years of getting nothing at home. I still enjoyed sex with my wife but she closed up, and I couldn't stand it anymore. Not sure if I'd continue had she been more romantic.
I am now remarried (to a former escort), and continue to hobby with her blessings since we live 1,500 miles apart. If we lived under the same roof, I would continue to hobby as I have so many close provider friends, some of whom I've know almost 30 years, that I could not bear the thought of not seeing them again.
It's just possible to have lust for more than one woman at a time. I look, I lust, I want to act on it.
Marriage is sort of a bureaucratic thing. The fact of it has no bearing on lustful feelings.
I was married 20 years, the last 15 were awful. I should have left earlier. I had an affair during the divorce process with a younger woman, I helped support her financially also. I was a dumbass in love. One month my cash flow was tight, the girlfriend knew about the divorce, the wife knew at this point about the girlfriend, I could not help financially that month. The girlfriend went on radio silence and I googled her number, that led me to this site and other sites. She is a provider. I had no idea, thus why I say I was a dumbass in love. When confronted the girlfriend denied everything and told me what a piece of shit I was. Obviously that relationship is over although I still love and care for her. She is the reason I'm not interested in any type of gfe.
If I had it to do over again I would have stayed faithful, divorced earlier, and started seeing providers as soon as the ink was dry on the divorce. Providers play a great role in life, providing what you need when you need it. Good providers should be treasured
Been with the wife almost 40 years now. First 25 years were great sex, great BBBJ, and I never touched another woman.
Honest!
In 2004 she stopped sucking my dick, one month later I found TER and started hobbying. Would stop if I got it at home.
Meanwhile I'm having a great time in hobbyland. Have to admit the wife looks great for her age, and we do sleep/spoon together every night.
... including us female mongers.
I see providers simply because I love variety. My wife gives me all I want and I still seek others. It's just how I'm wired.
I travel a fair amount and like meeting the women, filling the time, and maybe experiencing something new. My wife and I have sex on a regular basis when we're both at home. There are somethings she does better than some providers and some providers who do somethings better than her. This is really about me seeking out a little extracurricular pleasure. I stopped trying to analyze it.
I married my wife because I was lonely. I married her because she is a good person and was a friend before we got together. She is sweet and smart and a good Mom, she works full time and actually makes slightly more than I do. I love her, she loves me.
She gives the absolute hands down best bbjcimnqns in the fucking world! All while edging me! Her oral is bliss. She loves when I daty as well and is multi orgasmic and cums like crazy. When we have sex. Which is 1-2 x a month. She is also about 5'3" and 200 lbs.
However, I need more. I need sex at least once a week (preferrably 2x a day!). Jacking off only gets me so far. I want head and I want a woman. I don't want to give up my wife and family and all that we have shared (she is still my best friend in the world) but I just need MORE. (The fact that the providers and/or SBs I see range from 7 to 10 on the appearance scale doesn't hurt either) the wife is about a 6 appearancewise. Hell, I wouldnt even care if she was a 5 if we simply did it more I wouldnt stray because my wife is a 10 on service when she finally decides it is time we do something.
Did you say both that your wife is 5' 3" and 200 lbs and then go on to claim she is "about a 6" in appearance???
Please tell me you made a typo somewhere.
I guess being love is like wearing "beer goggles" at last call? :p
It's great that people can be honest on this forum, except for fuckers like you who have an impulsive need to insult every fucking thing. Go see a therapist.
Besides everyone knows that a best in class BBBJ raises the visual score by at least one, sometimes 2 grades.
No matter how ugly a woman is, she is somebodies favorite fuck..... also no matter how good looking a woman is somebody is tired of fucking her.
So if there is a relationship it better be about more than fucking
You have spoken quite well. These are basic principles that some people fail to understand.
Well said 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Yes, facewise she is ok and she has nice tits. Just cuz you don't like fatties doesn't mean they are all fugly. Like I said, she is a great person other than the infrequency of our sex. Performace is a 9 for sex and a 10 for bj so she isnt bad all around. Sheesh, she IS my wife, not a pro.
I do believe appearance scores are greatly exaggerated.
In your case, she's your wife, you still love her, I can accept a bit of "grade inflation" lol
Additionally, I have had a lot of great sex with pros, but i have had sex even better with non pros. I am NOT one of those guys who insists that hooker sex is always better than civvy sex.
After maybe the first year, married sex doesn't normally include blowjobs. Even guys sometimes want a little foreplay.
My wife is still hot as hell 17 years into marriage but she is no fun in bed. Much is due to kids taking a ton of time but even when we have time she wants it quick and over so she can do other things
But when I was, the wife stopped putting out and later had a dozen or more affairs. Also, I lost my religion around that time. I no longer consider marriage to be sacred, and if a woman's body is a temple, it's going to be MY goddamn temple for an hour or two.
Need more reasons?
not surprised most of the women stop loving you and you in turn need to pay or otherwise put the envelope out of sight so you don't feel like you are paying to be "loved and cared" for .. for that hr or so.
Its one thing to pay for sex, another thing to pay a pretend person to love and care for you when even your wife won't do that ...lol
You get walked over by your wife and then get walk over by a hooker, geezz you really should feel bad for yourself
But then again women want a real men, being a carpet is not something that turns anyone on. Well except the hooker because she can get away with lackluster behavior and still not be reported 
..... and stomps all over me. A little California Hard Core Ecstasy. Then a good flogging and a riding crop to the balls.
Never thought MAC could get me all turned on.
Good onya ya prick!
-- Modified on 12/7/2017 6:02:16 PM
My wife was once drop dead gorgeous and great at sex but she eventually lost interest in it. She actually said we didn’t need it as we had so much going for us without it. Hence, I started hobbying. Within the past several years, she has gained conisderable weight and I don’t find that appealing. I love her, and like her as a person. She has many fine attributes and a great sense of humor but I’m not sexually attracted to her. Additionally, once you start this stuff, it is extremely difficult to stop. I’ve tried repeatedly with only transient success.
Relationships are simply complicated, and people change over time as well. I see several married gentlemen who are married. The majority of them state that their reason for seeing an escort is that they aren't receiving the love and attention they need from their spouse. I do not believe that there are many men who see escorts when having a healthy love/intimate relationship with their wife/girlfriend at home.
Married for almost 24 years - wife has depression and started taking meds. Good news it helped smooth out her depression - bad news it just killed her sex drive completely. Off her meds - sex is amazing. Started seeing providers as a way to fill in the gap. Have had some real honest talks about sex about my wife. Admitted we are really good at being marries but man do we stink at sex - like really just can not connect. She has gained a ton of weight and is less attractive as well (thanks to the meds ). We keep talking about it but just not getting any better. Promised weekly BBJs if got the fence installed; that was 30 plus days ago - nothing.
Seeing providers has been great for me personally - made me much more confident as a person and man. Cheaper than divorce which I really do not want but have pretty healthy sex drive at 50 still. Tried some things that I dreamed about, developed an outlet when things at home get tough. Met some very amazing women and keep some sanity
could find something that works for depression without killing the sex drive. Most all of them cause sexual dysfunction for women to orgasm. There are 2 antidepressants that I know of, that do not cause this side effect. Has your wife tried Effexor or Wellbutrin? Also, unless she is clinically depressed she should not have to stay on a medication. If she is using medication for situational depression then I would encourage her to make changes with what is causing her stress, low energy and depression. I would have her walk or exercise 20 minutes a day, also get 20 minutes a day of sunshine either outdoors or artificial light from a tanning bed. It really works to lift the mood to be outdoors in nature.
Regaining sexual energy with your wife is going to take work from both of you. The longer you have went without, the harder it is for her to get aroused. You are going to have to initiate. I would buy toys to bring in the bedroom especially if she is having difficulty orgasming. Don't let her say that she is tired, headache or whatever... take control and initiate. Dedicate 30 minutes at least a couple of times a week when she feels her best!
Maddie
My wife an I enjoy a somewhat open marriage. We are both aloud to buy and sell sex. We are open about it. My wife does put out and gives me a full menu for lack of a better term. I find my wife extremely attractive.
But here is the thing we both enjoy variety, my wife more so than me. Since my wife and I have an agreement allowing P4P, I enjoy some strange now and then, and I can afford i, why not? I have never cheated, and would never but it just isn't cheating if the wife knows, and actually encourages it, it isn't cheating. Especially since she is doing it too, both with and without me. If my wife asked me to I would stop.
When I caught the hubby he was totally shocked! He said “I paid to have them leave” less drama and no real emotional commitment. I guess it’s better than an affair. I think he’s stopped he told me those were dark times and would prefer to be in a real relationship. Anyway that’s what he said....still together it’s pretty good a little attention, sex, intimacy, and friendship go a long way to healing a dead relationship.
Interesting. You must be checking here to see if he's active.
I think it is a mistake to check. The only thing you'll ever find will be something that brings you misery.
Damned if you do....damned if you don’t
Pretty astute response!
I think only damned if you do. He didn't leave you and you didn't leave him. You must have some foundation, be it love, friendship or financial interests in which the situation is not so terrible that you feel you must flee.
By snooping all you are doing is taunting fate to force you to make a choice between living in a situation you find tolerable and divorce, financial difficulty and loneliness. I really don't see the upside to snooping. If he is going to leave you he eventually will. You can't prevent that with by locking him in a cage, in fact it will only hasten it, or force the issue on your part.
Don’t want to lock anyone in a cage that’s no fun for either party, Love, freedom, sex and security for all. However, I’m not getting any younger and do not want to be blind sided again...Gotta say though this is a little guilty pleasure for me and besides this is his handle anyway! Yeah and I was pretty shitty so I’ve learned my lesson I will never be that cold disinterested wife again....good nite!
Seems like its the same story. My appetite was always greater than hers for vanilla sex. She liked the stranger stuff, which I was happy to oblige but did nothing for me. Guys on this board would pay big bucks for what she liked, but she just didn't like sex that often.
So, getting tired of asking, was on travel and had an opportunity. Easy, nobody would find out, bam...addicted.
Why I don't give out my info anymore? An agency had a little black book and the rest is history.
Sex is important, but for me the connection is a bigger part of the rendezvous. Don't have a desire or time to seek out a civii. What can be better than hobbying with beautiful intelligent ladies who can entertain me for an hour or 2. Sometimes longer if my schedule permits to enhance my life from my normal routine, which I do cherish.
Connection is the key and I will keep seeing the ladies whom I have wonderful intellectual conversations and sometimes interesting debates with.
My wife hasn't been interested in sex for a very long time. She is a great mom, a pretty good wife and a great friend. If we were having sex of any sort at all I don't think I would have looked beyond the fence. But once u look, the grass is not only greener, it's really fucking green! I am a happier man by far and frankly a better husband since becoming a lot more active in the field.
When I'm in a relationship, I don't indulge in p4p. That's what works for me, as I don't want the guilt and I don't have to keep my lies straight
There are times when a civvie relationship just isn't in the cards for me (as has been my situation for the last 4 1/2 years), so when I'm able to find the time to play, a companion of negotiable affection is the perfect solution.
Should I find myself available for a civvie relationship again (and that probably won't be for a few years yet), I'll take off some time from p4p.
Because she NEVER does it.
makes me find pussy elsewhere.
Good reason?
I totally enjoy variety and I have no interest in seriously developing a side chick or whatever! I've done that and it is too much like being married to two women ! Over the years in P4P I have developed several favorites in different markets and locally as well. Just seems to work for me !
Was together for almost 20 years, but the sex life faded after the second kid and she promised more, but never did anything. When we had sex, it was like she couldn't wait for it to be over (and rarely blew me and stopped letting me DATY - my fav). She shut down my romantic motions, naughty come on's and even trying to plan to have sex on certain days - so I stopped trying.
Started in the hobby and with SB's for many years, exploring a lot of things and seeing a ton of women (most good, some not). I decided I needed to stop for her and the family and change my outlook on sex for the good of the fam. About 6 months after I stopped, she tells me she wanted sparks and romance - and she had fallen in love with another man. I pointed out she is the reason I stopped with the romance and why our sex life was almost non-existant and she agreed it was her fault. She divorced me, realized he was a jerk and I've moved on. I've done a little hobbying since the divorce and I've been having fun with civvie ladies (some are as hot and dirty as many pros!)
Funny, had she actually put in a little effort on our sex life, I'd not be here and we'd still be married.
Speaking for myself, time spent with a provider is a brief moment away from the realities of life and all of its associated problems. I love my wife and we have great sex but when I’m with an escort I am totally free even if only for a little while
My wife no longer wanted to have sex. I was frustrated for the longest time and considered divorce but I love her and she is still the best part of my life. After a couple of years of resentment and lots of masturbation, I looked into an escort while travelling for business in Australia because it was available and legal. I was on cloud nine having a hot young lady satisfy me in every way, that I having looked back. I still love my wife as much as always but now I'm not frustrated with her lack of desire for sex.