I would be interested on what both providers and hobbyists would say to this. Earlier in the day I was texting with a provider I have seen several times, although not in the past year. We had very good sessions previously. As it turns out, she was in the area, reached out and contacted me to let me know she was near by and wanted to know if I was interested in getting together. We found a mutual time and date that worked. As a final thought I asked her if I could request she dress a certain way when I arrived. I didn't ask her to be naked. But I was thinking about a minimalist approach to her clothing. Before I could even request what I wanted she replied that it would need to be classy and nice. I don't have a problem with classy and nice in general, but she has a great body which I haven't seen for awhile so I had some other ideas. And since I am the one paying I thought it was not unreasonable to have some input into how she would be dressed. Nope, she made it quite clear that she controlled what she would be wearing, and my opinion or request would not be honored. So the question is this: was I being unreasonable to request a specific type of clothing? Was she being unreasonable to disregard my request and tell me she wasn't interested in my request? I just thought it was rather inflexible on her part.
It's reasonable to make a clothing request, but it's also reasonable for a provider to decline. She may have an appointment or other prior commitment right before or after you that requires classy attire.
First, It's totally reasonable for her to decline any of your requests.
Second, I can totally see someone not wanting to spend $100+ on an outfit that she's going to wear once for you, and then in all probability never see you again. Sounds like good business.
Now, if you wanted to make this happen, you should have offered to pick something out for her and purchased it for her, presenting it on the day of meeting. See, you could have turned this into a nice gift, but instead you've turned it into an awkward conversation that you're blaming her for.
...I don't do BCD clothing requests. It's largely because I don't do any kind of role play or dress up - I'm me and that's what you get. There's really not anything more to it than that.
There are lots of ladies out there that are brilliant at dress up and role play and I wouldn't be offended if a fella declined time with me to go and role play elsewhere. It's his choice. Thinking about it, non BCD clothing requests would be pretty limited too - again for the same reasons....but I've never had anyone tell me they've been disappointed by my attire either when I'm wearing it or when it's on the floor ☺️
I ask her to greet me in high heels and lipstick, nothing else. Never been turned down, it never cost me anything extra, and no awkward conversation. Problem solved.
If, and I want to be clear, if that's what you asked for then she's a nut for not providing that for you. Most or all traveling ladies surly must carry that along. If you requestd a school girl or a nun outfit, I can see her telling you no way Jose.
Sounds to me that she must be that elusive, "Elite Provider"....in her mind.
Two band-aids and a cork.
...then I can't see her having any issues with a clothing request. If she's cutting her other obligations timing so tight as to make that an issue then she's got bigger problems than just a wardrobe request.
If she is visiting you, then I don't see why she couldn't do a change of clothes at your place, including deducting the time it takes to do so from the scheduled date time.
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-- Modified on 6/21/2017 4:28:34 PM
sounds like you are paying for the Wife Experience, not the GFE.
It is VERY important to me what a woman is wearing when I see her. So I ALWAYS ask after the date is booked and I've been screened if it's OK for me to make a clothing request. I have NEVER been told no. If I were told what you were told I would break the date.
I figure the gentleman is paying, so I do whatever I can in my power within reason to accommodate his clothing request. I want to fulfill his fantasy and make sure he has a pleasurable time.
The only things I don't like are 1) when I'm on tour and someone makes a clothing request at the last minute. I can't bring every outfit I have with me, so I like it when gentlemen make a clothing request in their initial email or as early as possible when I'm touring. 2) a gentleman makes a clothing request for something I don't own, and expects me to go out and buy it. I decline clothing requests if it's something I don't already own, unless the gentleman buys it himself and brings it along to our date. Then I'm happy to wear it, as long as it's brand new with tags still on.
Perhaps I'm blind, and no I'm not reading every single word of every ad I check out, but I don't recall noticing any providers prominently flashing an extensive wardrobe (yes, I've seen a few where one or two sets of lingerie, etc...are displayed, but I'm talking a full set). Perhaps this could be a strong marketing angle, escorts can display their variety of clothing and underwear sets and hobbyists can make requests?
Now to further your point, how would you feel if a potential client asked for something you did not have, and then when you could not fulfill the request posted about it here, complaining and calling you "unaccommodating"?
Some girls post photos in outfits they don't own. Other women have the wardrobe to accommodate your requests and have no problem doing so. I love that. Some girls agree to wear what you requested and don't. It is such a mixed bag I rarely ask for anything more specific than stockings and heels, or a garder belt.
I've had better luck booking with providers who post images in the kinds of outfits I'd like them to wear. It's more than likely if they choose to dress how you like, it will be an easy request to accommodate. But yea, just because you're paying doesn't mean you can dress them like a doll. I know a lot of guys are guilty of living in their fantasy and not realizing their meeting a real person. There are tons of escorts out there who will there are tons of escorts out there who will dress anyway that you want... you just have to find the ones who are cool with that
I've had plenty of girls say, "I couldn't find that outfit so I hope this one's OK." That's fine, but at least she tried and didn't say no.
Well you did not mention in your post what it was that you were requesting her to wear?Is this a touring lady or a local lady?I can't say if she was being unreasonable since you did not mention what you wanted her to wear.
I have guys who have booked appts mention they have a clothing request.I will accommodate them as long as it is nothing extreme.Most guys will mention heels,stockings,garters,maybe a certain color of lingerie,jeans,or a dress.
I get many clothing requests for me to wear something I wore in one of my photos or a certain type of heels I wore.
I have no issue with this as I still have everything I have ever worn during one of my shoots.
There has been on occasions where a guy might ask for a specific color stockings and I don't have it I will go buy it if it is not too expensive.But that is just me and every lady is different there are some ladies who will not accommodate any clothing requests.
It's not unreasonable to make clothing requests. Most providers have something on the websites about clothing requests. So unless you were asking her to wear stripper clothes to a fancy restaurant then I don't think it was unreasonable.
But without context as to what your actual request was, we don't know if the request itself was unreasonable or her refusal wasn't justified.
I can't help but think that the details have been purposefully omitted by OP in order to save face.
I'm betting that if we knew the whole story we'd be roasting the OP by now.
have only brought certain wardrobe items along with her.
Different story (as Lopaw said previously) if you are going to her incall. If I am going to her incall I may make a request in advance based on something I've seen in her photo gallery.
Outcall requests are a different story. Sure, she wants to blend in when she arrives at your hotel, but she can always change into something else when she gets there. There was one time I had a provider change into a nice sexy outfit and then after things go heated up, she went and changed into another sexy outfit before the main course. Unfortunately, she has since retired.
If I've seen a provider before, and there's something I'd like to see her in, I just buy it. It can be as simple as bra, panties and heels, or more complex such as jackets and boots and stockings, etc, , but I get the color I want, the texture, and she always looks great in it.
If I don't feel like buying something, then I just ask for a nice set of bra, panties and heels, and hope for the best.
We're paying enough, we don't need to be paying for wardrobe, and we don't need elitists like u telling us, "ok, don't, and just be happy with whatever she has on" (I know BTW, obviously have no clue if you're actually an elitist, just throwing it in for effect).
It's not a clear cut, black and white issue, I just think wardrobe is part of the profession
In my case I want the ladies I see to be wearing a smile, and nothing else. My donation covers that just fine. lol
See, I can point it out when you are right as well as when you are wrong. Its the one happens a lot more than the other, but maybe that will change with time, maybe.
be right more often and I'll get better at it. lol
But yeah, some guys seem to think that giving gifts, over paying, jumping through hoops etc etc etc, to the women that are supposed to be making THEM happy, somehow makes for a better experience, but then in their very next post they whine about how "used" they feel.
It's not rocket science, you don't have to be a jerk, but "manning up" will go a long ways towards enjoying this hobby without feeling like a sap or an ATM.
I do not honor "minimal" clothing requests (i.e. very short skirts, super low cut tops, etc) if I'm doing outcall. It's funny how guys value discretion so highly and yet would want me looking like a whore walking up to the door. However, I wouldn't mind changing at the location only if bringing the clothes was convenient for me.
It was nice of her to let you know she was around and available. It was not so nice of you to take her "no" so personally.
I am sorry but I have to totally agree with Abbi. I simply will not dress in public like a whore. I am happy to dress like one in private.
Christine
Yes your paying so it seems she should accomodate and when i get simple requests like thigh highs,the color red,secretary,etc i will do my best.
But on the other side of it we may not have a particular outfit or we may feel uncomfortable wearing certain thing and when we are not feeling sexy and comfortable it affects the session overall. I have had guys requests certain things that I know would not look great on me with my body shape because I have a 38 k size breast and I'm a bigger woman they may simply not make something in my size ot thier request may not be flattering on me.
Overall i do my best but there could be a few factors of why a provider wouldnt/couldnt.
Afterall, you're the one who's paying for her service, and in this hobby wardrobe is a very important service detail that can't be disregarded. It may be the very thing that triggers a more intense arousal, especially if the client is into CFNM. I think she was being totally unreasonable to think it was all about how she felt, and that's the surest way for her to lose business, especially when word starts to spread. It's her body as long as we're not paying for it.
for any number of reasons. Maybe she doesn't own what you want (in which case offering to buy it might work), she may have other engagements that day that require different dress, your request might be more of a fetish than she is comfortable with. Guys ask for some pretty specific and sometimes bizarre things.
Personally, I don't specify dress unless it is simple guidance about is what is suitable for wherever we are going. In all reality, I expect clothing and lingerie to be discarded pretty damn quickly once we are BCD anyway.
..... without all the specific details, it's hard to say who was being "unreasonable".
But on the surface? You were not out of line to ASK, but no lady should be expected to accommodate clothing requests, unless of course she advertises that she will do so.
Hopefully, as long as you asked her in a polite & respectful way, she responded in kind.
Actually, the same goes if your wording was more along the lines of, "oh btw, I want you in your highest heels and a bikini!"..... she wouldn't be out of line to reply, "OK! And btw, my rate just doubled!". In my opinion, of course. LOL.
I will NOT grant any clothing request other than adding stockings/thigh-highs/garters to my chosen ensemble, and this is mentioned on my website.
Why? Because I know I provide a better experience when I feel good (sexy) in what I'm wearing.
Yes, I am inflexible on this (and other things) and don't mind admitting it.
Very fortunately for me, there are enough gentlemen who don't make clothing requests that I can get away with this attitude. Trust me, if I found any of my more superficial policies were having a seriously negative impact on my popularity, I'd rethink them. LOL.
I like wearing what I think looks good on me. There are guys that request I wear things I've worn in photo shoots and that's annoying because for one I don't keep those clothes and number two they can be uncomfortable or impossible to get into alone. I need another person to lace up a corset from the back. Wearing thigh highs looks great in a picture but they don't stay up in person so they look bad. I would prefer to wear what I like. I don't feel like being uncomfortable for dates. However if a guy BUYS me something to wear, that I can actually fit, I will wear it if he insists.
You were not unreasonable to ask. And she is in her right to decline your request. After all, it was a REQUEST, not a demand. That's not how it works.
Also, there's so many variables at play regarding clothing requests.
I can only really speak for myself, but I do take them within reason. If it's something I have and it's not a whole lot of work to add to my outfit, I'll oblige.
If the date consists of public time together on top of between four walls, I'll indulge in requests that are still discreet enough for the occasion, and decline if they're not for reasons that should be obvious.
If the request encompasses items that require extra work to wear, like tight lacing corsets, sky high stiletto heels and such, and I have them, I might request an extra fee if the date is on the shorter side.
If the request includes things I do not own, I will ask the client to bring them, as I've had the bad experience of buying items for clients that ended up cancelling.
And so on and so forth.
As you can see, sometimes there's a lot to a request.