This is one is for any highly paid executives, large company owners, trust fund kids, celebrities, high profile men, etc.
How do you go about getting verified? As much as i would like to use the services of some of the gorgeous providers on this site i am very, very, very reluctant to give my real name, company name, or any type of personal info to anybody.
If you are a provider and i give you this data you have to "store" it some where right? Even if a had full trust in you the provider, there is still no way that you can be 100% sure it won't fall into the wrong hands. It could be LE (highly doubt it) or just something as simple as a pissed off screener or maybe even the "cleaning lady". I could be at risk of fraud, extortion, etc.
i don't mean to disrespect anyone, it just seems very risky to me.
just asking.
The easiest way to get into the game, in me opinion, is to look for a lady who is a date-check member, and who will see you without a prior reference. They exist! Once you've seen the lady, ask her for a date check referral. Then you are a verified date check member, and many of the better ladies are either members of this service or accept it as verfication.
from a provider prospective (and I am speaking for myself only), I screen you when I get the screening form and then erase everything. I rely on my memory most of the time(which is pretty good if I do say so myself) to give references. That is why I don't give a reference unless I have seen you within the last 6 months. I do memory exercises to remember you. I know this sounds crazy but I would rather be safe than sorry. I don't like anything being left on my computer. I change passwords and do sweeps of cookies, temp and email files, so that I don't have your info on my computer. I am sure there is some way that they could still get the info. Once sent out over the net it is there forever or so they say. I don't know if this helps you or not. All of the ladies are different and like I said I am only speaking for myself. I hope things work out for you. Muah!
Then move along to another source: Like CL where you had previously posted you had been playing.
Continually posting your objection to cooperating with providers screening isn't going to change any established providers policies, procedures, avenues of screening or her opinion of how she chooses to protect herself-
Just move along to another preference of yours if you can't deal with the providers screening- posting continuously about your objection and making comments with insinuations about what a provider might do once you have met her isn't painting you in a very favorable light- Just an FYI for future conversations you might have with a provider.
-- Modified on 10/9/2008 7:14:39 PM
Tori, it is GREAT to see you posting again. Your words are always so wise! I hope all is well with you in Atlanta!
Jim
I'm back "visiting" CONUS until the end of October- I'll be around the capital area most of October. I appreciate your welcome back.... kisses T
Well my preference would be a brothel (plenty of 'em in vancouver) or something like a red light district (plenty of them in europe). Just walk in off the street anonymously, see the providers in person and let's go.
But you have a point, i'll stop bringing it up on this board
and i never "played" with anyone from CL i was just looking for solutions. same thing i'm doing here. looking for a solution to the screening problem. and yes, i feel it's a problem. I would never ask you for you real name or social or anything. I respect your privacy.
but unless you are willing "to take one for the team" you see our reviews which tell you all you need to know about us. The providers don't have a review system for the gentlemen. Probably a good thing - we'd all be laughing so much, we wouldn't have time for appointments. LOL (just kidding guys, you know you are the stud muffins you think you are!)
After reading all your posts and listening to your parania, have you not thought about the fact that Spitzer was the one who brought all the trouble to himself??? I need just as much discretion as you do. My personal life would be pure hell if others found out what I do. You may have more money than I do, but that doesn't mean that your carelessness couldn't screw me over as well. I KNOW how careful and discreet I am. You (or any hobbyist that I communicate with) are unknown. Case in point - I received a phone call from someone that I had been in contact with months ago. We had never met. When I mentioned that I wasn't sure what we discussed since everything was deleted, he offered (and did) send me all of our past emails! And this wasn't the first time that has happened. Now what if HIS pc gets in the wrong hands????
Safety is a two way street. You will do well to remember that.
Play safe and have a great weekend.
Kari~~
I'm wondering just how many "employees" of your department are posting. Now you 'claim' you never played with anyone from CL- Your previous post suggested otherwise:
Posted by evilclown, 10/5/2008 3:43:16 PM-
So i finally joined TER, I am now a VIP. First of all thanks to everyone who makes this possible, it is a wonderful service. What lead me to join after knowing about its existence for over 5 years??
Well first of all i'm going thru a dry spell, but mostly a bad experience with a CL provider late last night. She seemed like a cute petite girl next door (in pics and over phone). Showed up to a filthy "crack house" and the girl was definitely her, but she had clearly gone thru some rough times. God knows what kind of drugs she was on.
http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=44663&boardID=33&page=1
Communicating with a woman off of CL and setting up a meeting with her then following through IS playing w/ a provider off CL- whether you actually paid her, or just placed those shiny silver bracelets on her.... doesn't really matter, you posted this was your behavior- I am only pointing out that this is considered "playing with" a provider off of CL. Maybe you should communicate when you guys have shift changes- then your story wouldn't contradict itself.
as my late father would have said..... '
Consider the carelessness of the provider who doesn't care to screen at all.
Is that someone you want to spend time with?
You have to make a decision as to whether or not the hobby is right for you. If you are so concerned for your privacy, then this is probably not for you.
i never said don't screen at all, i'm just wondering about an alternate system for those whose privacy is more important than others. To assume that the privacy of a 27 year old, single, locksmith is the same as a 55 year old, married, Chevron executive is just ridiculous.
i will admit that as of right now i don't have any great solutions that will satisfy both parties but i'm looking; because to me privacy is paramount. It seems to me a little close minded to just say, well that's just the way we do it and too bad. The fact that a more private solution is not in place doesn't mean it doesn't exist. I am surprised that men/clients don't seem to think this is a big issue. Providers certainly care about their privacy that's why they don't use their real names! I respect that.
How does this sound for an alternative. It's just a simple idea and i know it's not for everyone.
A provider meets an "unverified" possible client at a neutral spot of her choice (starbucks, etc). The client pays her, her full fee for doing absolutely nothing other than meeting him, respecting his privacy and giving him a fair chance for a possible "real" encounter. This initial meeting will last as long as the provider wants, she calls all the shots. The goal is to "feel out" the potential client. Girls are very intuitive as we all know and i think can do an excellent job at determining if the guy is trouble or not. The are no expectations or strings attached of any kind. At the end of the meeting nothing happens, the provider doesn't even have to make up her mind at this point. The client understands that this is the price he has to pay for his privacy. If the provider thinks the client is "cool" then she can contact him at her convenience, if not then she never sees him again.
how about that?
not a good solution at all. "girls are very intuitive" is what it boils down too. on the other hand i am sure that a practiced psycho or LE agent can put on an act that can get past those "intuitions". many serial killers use some social skills to entice their victims. i am sure that a thorough shower and use of mouthwash can subdue the bouquet of doughnuts from LE.
the scenario you describe (whether it is you or a hypothetical) of a married 55 year old Chevron executive is not at all extraordinary in its need for discretion compared with other posters here. what is extraordinary is the flimsiness of your suggested "alternatives". they are careless and not well thought through.
woman would meet without knowing anything about you. I have met "newbies" before who didn't have any references and were cautious about me doing a work reference. We met in a public place, he showed me his id and his pay stub (numbers hidden) to verify who he is. Yes, he paid for my time. Personally, I don't keep any information. I delete all records and use a computer program (white wash) to totally erase all deleted files from my pc. Typically I can remember someone if they tell me something about our last visit.
A suggestion: Do some research, find a provider who seems mature,professional, with a proven track record. Give her the information she needs, set a date and then use her as a reference. Once you get started, you will rarely have to share that information again.
Kari~
-- Modified on 10/10/2008 7:23:01 AM
Is that men can be very good actors when they want to be. Spending time with a guy in a coffee shop is not the same as being alone with him in a hotel room. The bottom line here is that verification is about protection. The information is needed in case something goes wrong during the appointment. Yes, a reference is good as well but ultimately I don't know any quality ladies that are not going to want work info and your real name as it appears on your drivers license. Even if you DO use a verification service you will still have to cough up your real name when you book with a lady.
The mistake you are making here is your assumption that hobbying is strictly a buyer's market. On some levels it is but here on TER it's really not. If you want to deal with AMPS, Brothels or Craig's List you will have no problem getting laid and calling yourself John Smith all day long. If you want to see the ladies that frequent this board and are well reviewed you are going to have to submit to their preferred screening process. They are not calling you dude, you are calling them...
Clearly we think on different levels. This may sound a bit odd to you so just try to understand this concept-
Regardless of what you do for a living and regardless of what part of the world you live in.... the privacy of every client is of importance to the provider he is spending time with. Most established providers could care less how you have earned your money. We get paid to protect the client regardless of who he is.... I'm sorry to disappoint you but the fact that someone might be "high profile" would only have an influence on the donation that the provider requests because high profile clients usually take more effort and time to protect than a regular citizens who have anonymity to the general public.
Titles, bank accounts and looks usually don't impress most established providers- the fact that you leave your donation up front, keep communications simple and don't request additional time & effort usually weigh more than any title or "position" Sorry to disappoint you but as an established provider..... no client's sense of privacy is more valuable than another. I protect all of my clients the same.
Again I suggest you research more, you familiarize yourself with established providers and you try to refrain from adding asinine statements to the board.
-----and don't bother sending me any additional PM's you are on my ignore list-
At least you only have to give the info once, and not to the lady that could try to blackmail you. I would trust a verification company to destroy the verification data promptly. After all, that is the purpose of their business.
Unless you plan to rent a car for each date, she can mark you from your car.
From all your posts in this forum, I have determined that you are a prominent self-employed business owner with an acute paranoia complex. I think you need to lie down on my couch and relax for a while.
Of course, I'll need to screen you first.
Sincerely,
Dr. Carrie Hillcrest-Freud
you are almost 100% correct, but i don't think i was really trying to hide it? now if you can guess what my sexual issues are then we are onto something.
Ah, yesss. Very goot, I theenk that ve can feegure dees out.
Eet seems dat you are highly undersexed, a result ov a defense mechanism in vich your ego eez severely repressink your id.
I beleef dat ve can verk on dees togezer. But I veel ov course need to screen you first.
i wish i was highly undersexed, then i wouldn't have to be here to begin with : )
if i ever make it to dallas i will undergo your screening ritual.
not sure if i will pass though, as i have no verifiable employment or residence : (
i guess money, charm and good looks just aren't enough anymore
; )
thanks for the offer, you are adorable
Please check out this post under general discussion
No Personal Info-I Need Help Providers &Hobbyists --- funtonite
With all due respect you are trying to manipulate the hobby and it's safety requirements to your paranoia. It just doesn't work that way.
Folks here have given you VERY good advice and you still choose to ignore it. You should not be partaking in the hobby.
Just My Two Cents,
Anneke
When screening I want your real name, work info and Ladies refs, its all for my safety. The Ladies will let me know you are safe sane and not an ass, and thats just as important as the rest.
Once you have been verified, and we have spent time together, all I need of any of that info is the memory of Our experience together. I remember your name, where you are from and what you do for a living but honestly, aside from Our experiences together, the rest of the info I have no interest in. What I remember of you is enough to give you a refs with another Lady, as well as a return visit with me.
I totally understand your issue, but then again it is what it is, and all the protest in the world will not make any difference in what the Ladies need to feel safe. Its risky for all parties, so you have the choice of, play by the rules or take your hardon n go home.
Simple as that.
Play safe all...have a hot n horny weekend Lovers!!!
Nicole
-- Modified on 10/10/2008 6:01:51 AM
Look back through this board. There are numerous posts by retired & self employed, like I am.
I may get turned down by some but frankly it has not been a problem. I truthfully explain my situation and the ladies I've chosen have worked with me. I have offered to meet in a neutral location if they prefer & have met a couple of times at the corner coffee shop.
But you have to be willing to give up some information.
You are worried about the provider... How discrete are you? Does your computer run a windows washer program so your TER log ins can't be forensically recovered from your computer? Do you have a separate hobby phone?
Please read back at least several pages on the newbie board, and all of the Newbie Manual at the top. This is not a hobby to be undertaken without knowledge.
skb
That the ladies have a right and a necessity to protect themselves. This is in your interest as well. If I find out that a lady is not screening, she's losing my business (and I'm richer than any fortune 500 type is today ' ) So if you want to see someone, and if you don't honk everyone off with your posts, talk with them about how you might make them comfortable with seeing you. There are many ways that a lady might screen you. Cooperate, get some references and enjoy the hobby. No sense in debating screening. And again, try to join date-check or one of the screening services.
If you are such a high profile person, then go to Nevada and do it legally. The only name they ask there is how many Ben Franklin's do you have.
Nevada providers (at a ranch) are not very pretty compared to LA standards. Vancouver is awesome, so is Thailand, Japan and Ukraine. To have someone in town is more convenient, i have also considered importing talent but then variety could become an issue.
and that goes for everybody, those who were actually helpful and also to those who weren't. Most of you have proven that there is no interest or need from this community to offer more privacy to clients. It's all supply and demand. Clearly providers have the upper hand and if there is no interest in change i can respect that and move on. Clients don't seem to mind giving out there info either so it seems the system that it is in place is perfectly fine for the majority of the community. Based on this i will stop writing about this subject.
i however am not part of the majority, neither in the real world nor obviously in this community, and feel that i have a right to express that. now that i did it's done.
P.S. for those of you who care, i don't give out my personal info to civilians either, until i've known them long enough, so it's nothing personal against providers.
Privacy is certainly important. However, offering any more privacy to clients than we already do would coincide with risking our safety without additional benefits. You need to be able to trust that a provider has huge incentives to respect your privacy. If she were to compromise a client's privacy, best believe it would also compromise her privacy- and just as importantly- her own livelihood. Best believe it would be all over this board and/or reviews and no client would see her after that. But if we screen you, take precautions to delete your data, and it exists only in our minds, how can we offer any more privacy? Only by not knowing that information at all. And I don't know about you, but I don't feel it is reasonable or respectful to expect any woman to put herself in that position. We offer a lot to our clients, and put ourselves out there in so many ways. Do you really expect a woman would be willing to meet a strange man in a hotel room with the willingness to meet his physical sexual and emotional needs without at least knowing his real name and a bit of personal info? I see you are fishing for ideas as to how this might work, but when it boils down, no self-respecting provider would accept this scenario, and nor should she. The important thing is to be able to tie an individual with a name/identity. Without that, you are not accountable for your actions and there is no recourse to protect others. If you harm a provider, and she doesn't know who you are, you will be able to do it again to another. And because providers have been harmed and do take risks, there is no way that you should be exempt, this must be applied evenly to keep things safe and fun for everyone. Furthermore, I am not comfortable meeting with someone without knowing something about them, and screening allows me to feel comfortable enough to go into the situation at my best and take good care of my client. Meeting in a coffee shop says nothing- you still don't have any accountability. It is true as others have said that many people who steal, scam, or hurt others are able to deceive them due to charm or personality. We don't want to know that you look nice, or act nice, or talk a good talk. We want to know that you are willing to be honest and allow us to check you out. Meeting in person under a fake name does not allow us to see if you have a history of violence or law enforcement involvement, it does not say anything about the way you have behaved in the past or the way you will treat us on subsequent visits.. does that make sense? I get what you are saying, but there is no feasible way that we can accurately and safely go about our business and meet new clients with anything less. What you can do- ensure a provider has good reviews, pm her reviewers if you have specific questions, use YOUR intuition as to whether she is trustworthy and professional. Beyond that, you need to trust us and give us a little credit. What you cannot do- get around the screening requirements or expect that providers will make an exception for you. Plenty of men from all professions and all walks of life do see providers, and there is rarely any problem. You are not unique in that respect, but others here do have a lot to lose as well, that is a risk you either choose to take or don't. You can minimize risks by seeing professional ladies and keeping your own discretion as well, but you can never eliminate the risk; neither can we. Your decision to make, whether it is worth it to you. But other men here take the risk, however minimal, without complaint, and realize that this is what needs to happen to keep everyone safe. We providers do everything we can to protect you because believe it or not our own livelihoods and our own discretion also depend on that. But we don't like being asked to make exceptions or treated as though we do not understand and respect the importance of privacy for everyone involved.
Touche!!!!!!!! I'm a Newbie. I've had reservations, but I don't think it could have been said any better. All my reservations have been laid to rest. LOL, this guy makes me glad I don't work for a Fortune 500 company. (Sigh) To be a regular Joe. LOL, I wouldn't have it any other way. 
I'm ASSUMING that you are the highly paid, middle-aged, married exec, or a trust fund baby you suggest (actually, it is just as likely that you are a smart, but lonely, high school sophomore). Up until a few weeks ago, you and I could walk into the same bank asking for a 6 figure line of credit, you get it, I don't!!! Your are known, and known to be trustworthy, I'm not. It works the same in the hobby world. If you want to claim privilege status, you first have to establish yourself. Somewhere along the line you will have to give out personal details.
As for personal privacy, we're all in the same boat. NO ONE's privacy is any more important than anyone else's. Your statement "To assume that the privacy of a 27 year old, single, locksmith is the same as a 55 year old, married, Chevron executive is just ridiculous," is elitist, offensive, and WRONG!!! WE ALL compute a risk/reward calculation when we hobby, with the ultimate risk being losing everything. Just because you have more to lose in absolute terms doesn't make your 100% loss greater than everyone else's.
Your suggestion for gals to offer a private M&G has some merit for "special potential customers", and some gals demand this, but it does have its problems. How is a gal supposed to determine that you are a 55 year old, married exec with Chevron, thus qualifying you for this alternate routine? Your word, given in an email from an an anonymous address? Back in the bad-old days of the hobby, when contacts were made via classified ads in the newspaper, or the local "adult alternative" rag, this type of full price visit was quite common. Unfortunately, the suggested follow-up visit rarely happened. If you don't trust providers, why give them an opportunity to violate your trust.
jazz32
-- Modified on 10/11/2008 5:58:58 AM
Here's a solution. You go ahead and give out your fake name with absolutely no verifiable info. This solution is only good for a non LE type guy.
What I suggest the ladies do is install a hidden webcam in their hotel or incall...(no outcalls to your hotel). If you are not a good guy and that is really up to the escort, she takes a snap shot of your face and places that on a national BCL. That way any other lady can have a copy and if you arrive under your fake name and hobby phone after contacting her on your anonymous email address she simply runs through her database and if you're on there asks you to leave.
Then you can go about changing the fake name etc all you want but you may have some trouble changing your mug just to see an escort.
Now remember if you actually hurt an escort this mug shot can be handed to the police and then plastered on the TV. Or this national database can be open to the public just like escort reviews and there you are in all your hobbying glory for your family and friends and collegues to see.
Which way would you like this to go...because we are sick and tried of this crap. Escorts have their faces (not all) phone numbers, incall locations etc in full public view.
If it's good enough for a real fortune 500 guy to give me his real name and I could look him up on the Forbes website..you're complaining does nothing to change my mind. We ladies get very suspicious when a man who wants to be alone with us does not want to give any identifying info...what does he really intend to do and not have any accountability what so ever?
I just realizes Jazz...this is not directed at your comment but to the OP.
Take a closer look at his screen name (evilclown)...anyone think it's a tad John Wayne Gaceyish? Bet you have a crawl space just waiting to filled eh? From all those providers who will see you with no verifiable info.
that providers have the right to decide how they will operate their business. A good provider will always protect herself and put her saftey first. To me there's no amount of money that's worth walking into a situation where I could be physically hurt or arrested. Many providers are educated women with careers who only hobby on the side, and they have just as much to lose as you do. Screening is about establishing trust- and it goes both ways.
You can decide not to participate in this hobby and that's your right. Just please, whatever you do, don't contact providers and then refuse to provide your screening info. There's nothing worst than time wasters who ignore a providers website that clearly states their screening requirements. Grrrrrr....
We as providers have rules we follow, and it doesn't matter who the hell you are, or how much money you have in your bank account, any GOOD provider screens, it's how we do things, if your not down with any of this process, then i suggest you get in your little Bentley and cruise down town L.A. i'm sure you'll find girls that don't screen!
Jesus, I can't believe you had the balls to post something like this!!
As someone else said, use a verification service... Preferred 411, Datecheck or Room Service 2000. They can verify you even if you are a "trust fund kid," a retiree, etc.
Do your research. Find established and highly reputable providers. These ladies have multiple pages of reviews, by reviewers who have seen more than one provider. Also look at your local discussion board on TER or, if you are travelling, the local board for the area you will be visiting. Do a search of posts by and about any provider you consider seeing. She may not be a poster, but then again, she may. Are her posts well received or is there alot of drama associated with them. Do her peers and the hobbiests in the area respect her?
Most of us have other "high profile" clients who we already see. These gentlemen understand that their information is safe with us.
SINfully sinthia