Newbie - FAQ

Does the first message matter?
en32984 1 Reviews 2256 reads
posted

Hi,

I'm curious if the contents of a first message to a provider makes a difference or not.  As in, would a funny message increase the likelihood of a response or is it irrelevant?  What details would be relevant overall?

I've sent a couple generic messages but haven't heard back from anyone (likely because I'm brand new, no references or anything).  Would a clever message improve response rates?

Thanks!

-- Modified on 6/14/2017 3:11:19 AM

... but especially the first message.

Some providers ask for certain info to be included in the first message. If so, do that.  If you don't feel comfortable sharing all that info, move on to someone else who doesn't request it.

If the provider hasn't asked for specific info, I alway include the date(s) and time(s) I'm available--sync'd to her availability if she's published it--and info about providers who will vouch for me.  That's usually my P411 OKs since I almost always use P411 for initial requests these days. If she's not on P411 I mention my white lists and offer to send her references if she needs them.  P411 makes intros a lot easier IMO due to the OKs, plus my profile tells the provider what kind of person to expect when the door opens.  I also include the duration I'd like, and mention the general location if it's not obvious, e.g. give the city if she tours.

I usually give my TER handle (for white lists, and my reviews if she wants to read them), and it's in my P411 profile. If I don't put it in my initial message, I give it on request.  

I'll add a short close that includes something about how I'm really looking forward to meeting her, if she consents to see me.

The message is short, and respectful... including correct spelling and grammar.  I don't try for "clever", but I write it such that the provider can get a glimpse into my personality.  Of course, NEVER mention anything about services in a first message to a provider!  I don't put anything incriminating into ANY message to a provider.  

-- Modified on 6/14/2017 6:59:38 AM

Your first email has to show to the provider your serious about seeing her and that your not a "tire kicker". You do that by giving her a date, time and length of session.  

Since you're new you should mention that you'll agree to her screening protocols.  

Top providers get numerous emails a day and many simply delete the emails they perceive as being sent from time wasters and only respond to serious inquiries.

is an age old cliche. However, it is sooooo true.  

Also, as has already been said--be specific in your request. Don't just say "are you available later this week?" but say "Are you available Thursday evening, June 15 for a 1-hr. incall date?"  

This is what I do.  Be very business-like.  I do it really because I have nothing funny to say to someone I've never said or sent one word to.  I let the jokes develop instead of trying to lead with one.  Be specific in your request.  Say the date, time, and length.  Let them know you're serious, that's one sure way for the girl to open up to you.  

Also, I live by a mantra that I picked up early on when I first started TER, be polite and courteous.  No dirty talk until after you've heard back from her.  I usually let them start that dirty talk or the innuendo to gauge what's appropriate.  

so agreed. sometimes time wasters just email u back and forth or text you without any intention to make a session

appreciate when a gent sends his screening info and a little about himself and a date he is interested in.
I would also mention in your correspondence that you are a newbie and take  a look on her website if she mentions being newbie friendly.I think if you take the advice of HH you will have a way better chance of getting a response to your emails.
Good luck to you!

If it's good, a little dab of it can be quite alluring, but if it's bad, it will repel, and if you have too much of it, it will repel no matter what.

 
Are you a funny guy?    Do friends laugh at your jokes?   If yes, then give a bit of humor a chance.   Otherwise, steer clear and wait until you're BCDs to try out your material.

OCmadness112 reads

first started, I initially put in the first message all the info they requested along with a time and date for the meeting. In hindsight I was really lucky that everything worked out without much hassle. After that I was able to get other dates easily. Good luck.

We enjoy all the basics in the first contact...some only will respond if you register on their sites.  Your name, phone number and email (add info that are specific to you like don't text me or only text if I text first OR just whatever is your preference along with time variables of preferred contact).  References and pertinent info if you have them.  If not, provide info of an online presence and be prepared to be asked for more if that provider prefers that.  Give a little bio and intro...this can be a place for humor too.  I definitely enjoy a man with that catches my eye by making me laugh.  And yes, yes, yes....when----date and time with time frame---- do you ideally want to meet and where (your place or mine) plus give me wiggle room to tweak the time to sync with my personal schedule if you have it.  If there are special variables like "I can only meet in the day- weekdays- between 12-3pm...or on my home from work between 4:30-6:30pm or on the way to work early before 6am...or only weekends evenings etc etc etc.)

Hope this helps!

Thanks everyone!  I have a message put together that I think is pretty good based on the feedback I've gotten via message and here.  Would any providers / experts like to weigh in with their opinion?  Please PM me and I'll send it to you.

Register Now!