Monogamy is for Swans....

"It is a widely held view that certain animals -notably the great majority of bird species -- are monogamous. Second case in point: the belief that females of most species, including our own, strongly tend toward sexual fidelity -- in contrast to males, who are known to have a penchant for sexual variety, if not promiscuity".

The Nobel Prize-winning ethologist Konrad Lorenz used to recommend that every scientist discard at least one cherished notion every day, before breakfast. It is excellent advice (although Lorenz wasn't known for tossing away many of his own prized ideas).If we wait long enough, the world has a habit of making mincemeat of even our most strongly held ideas. The only thing necessary is to remain open to the evidence. " David P. Barash  

I read your previous post and greatly sympathized for you, and yet greatly appreciated your raw feelings bravely shared.. I felt your pain, and know so many others, that "if it were not for the grace of God, there go I".  

Ive always believed that, "One should learn to carry ones own water", (meaning do not confess ones sins to relieve feeling of guilt at the expense of others) and "if you carry coal in you pocket, expect to get your hands dirty" (meaning should be obvious).

However, with all said, and you really love your wife,a s you have previously said, then I see know reason why you both cant at least TRY to work this out.

Just my two cents, but if the is ONLY about sex, Go to her and let her know that you are no saint eitheR (without giving away to much).  You should be able to work things out..  Monogamy is nothing but a myth after all.

-- Modified on 7/10/2010 11:23:15 PM

97 reviews over 10 years means at least one visit with an escort per month.  And if he only wrote reviews for a small portion of his visits, then he was probably seeing a lot more than one woman per month.

Even if the wife did NOT know about the hobbying, is there a chance she left due to a lack of emotional/physical intimacy on Phunhog's part?  After all, if he's having sexual relationships with women outside his marriage, how much could he have been there for his wife in terms of physical and emotional intimacy.  

Women wander only when there is some deep need being left unsatisfied.  I have a feeling Phunhog's hobbying emotionally distanced himself  from his wife over a long period of time and he simply didn't realize it.  It's not uncommon for men to be oblivious to their partner's needs, especially if she wasn't articulating them.

Please don't attack me.  I'm not chastising Phunhog for his hobbying or saying he deserved what he got.  It's a shitty thing whenever a marriage dissolves and nobody wins.

Dressing differently, changing her tastes in music and showing an interest in things she never cared about before where all signs of someone else being in the picture. Most of us assumed she was having an affair with her girlfriend who is also getting divorced. Hence all the lesbian posts.

The fact is, neither of you was honest with the other. However, I believe that there is a difference between hobbying and cheating. Hobbying is recreational, without love or commitment. Cheating is more serious. I know some will find my logic flawed.

While I recommended, in my original post, that you consider counseling I am now thinking you need to get a really good (shark, pit bull) attorney.As I said in my original post, no divorce is easy or painless. Good luck to you.

Lancer

PS: I still don't understand why she was having sex with you almost every morning, under the circumstances. But, that is women for you.

Rule number one with trainers.

Rule number one with trainers.

If it's for your wife, make sure she has a female trainer.  Anyone else is going to spend an hour every day flirting and sweating with her and touching her while all her juices are flowing.  At some point she's going to want to suck his cock.

I started dating a girl and met her male trainer.  I told her hey by the way that guy wants to fuck you.  She said no way.  I said um yes way.  A week later she said yeah I think you're right and she fired him.  Unless your wife is a fat cow insist she get a girl trainer.

Working out brings out the sexual napalm in peeps.

And if it's for you guys unless you want to be distracted and thinking about sex and frustrated as hell every workout you should get a male trainer or just man up and train your fucking self you pussy!    

I've had many female trainers and I'm pretty sure I fucked most of them including the married and seriously dating ones.

All the phermones are just too much to resist.