First off this is not meant to make fun of advertizers on Back page. Well ok, there are a few out there that are really off the chart. Actually this is meant for us fellas to make a bit of fun of ourselves.
The rules??? We dont need no stinking rules with one exception, DO NOT make fun of an individual.
Gentlemen, if I can call you that, post your "ad" replying to this post, not someone elses ad. And feel free to comment without being rude.
Ladies, no voting till tomorrow. Let everybody get in today. You know how busy these boys can get. Also ladies yall can shill a little rotflmao. Also ladies you cannot put your ad here. It wouldnt help your image at all being associated with our lame attempts lol.
The winner will be appointed to the city council of Hobbywood as the Director of Public Parks and Recreation. You will be responsible to ensure the grass patches are all trimmed and looking good. IF you catch my drift.
Good Luck and may the mmmm best mmmm stud win!
Hi ladies! The name is ♥Love♥, Buddy Love, and I'm waiting just for you to give you the special treatment . •*"*•♥•*"*•
Not getting what you need? Let me take care of your needs and all your stress will go away.
♥No rush No fuss. ♥ wont leave you disappointed. So much that will have you mesmorized!
The ULTIMATE mature male companion, let me take your breath away. 1000pct BFE. So make your day a great one and call me. Dont keep me waiting 33six - 5five5 - 1one22
Ask about my 50 rose special!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
T_H_E • ★• _F_U_N_ ° ☆° S_T_A_R_T S _• ★•_ H_E_R_E ° ☆°
I am your New adDICKtion! Tired of the Same old Dick? Frustrated with NoT Getting what you want, when you want it.
Well Look no More, everything is all here,Handsome,Hung like Bull and never ending supply of Body Lotion. YOUR very own Toy.
On Demand and won't stop, better than any Rabbit or Dildo.
TXT friendly and I am always available day or night,Great Incall location down on the River.
Please call for rates and don't ask for speicals, and don't talk any nasty shit or I will probally get off, LOL.
Check out my web site for all the cuRRent and Stiff pictures, BIgMeat @footlong.com or 555/666/6969
Look no farther than right here! Sensitive, strong and sexual male for ALL your pleasurable needs! My pics are 110% real and I am well reviewed on BigSexy.com as well as TheEroticRedude.com...My goal in life is to make YOU happy! I love what I do and it shows in all that I do. I have a PHD in Sexual Healing as well as a Masters degree in Cunnilinguistics!
My Stats: 6'1" tall, 195lbs of warm steel and sex appeal! My tongue reaches out 8 inches and other parts reach MUCH further than that!
I'm always well groomed, clean and smelling good for you....I am the ultimate in discretion and only want to be like Calgon.....here to take you away!
Donations: 500 roses 90 mins, 750 roses for 3hrs (my personal Fav) 2750 roses for ALL NIGHT DONG!
Call me now..........867-5309
The HunkSter Hal
Hey ladies, you been with the rest now cum get with the best. Voted Charlottes best entertainer and new stud of the year. ask about my 60 beers special. Only in town for a few more hours be sure to cum get some of the best before I leave. Near airport and exit 69 off of highway 123 mall area
60 beers for 30
100 beers for 60
150 beers for 60 BFE
please note BFE is no small talk or cuddling, no DATY, no foreplay and you must leave when I finish. Other dudes may say they are BFE but they aren't, only I am truly 100 % BFE. Pics are recent if its not me its free. Call me soon at 5 fIv3 5 *for 4 four *(#*_ 1 two zero o and ask for Jacob.
Down to earth man ready to meet your every need. I'm 6ft with brown hair and deep blue eyes you can get lost in. I have soft hands to caress your silky smooth bodies but yet they are firm enough to hold you close and make you feel wanted/desired. I have a smile that can brighten the darkest of days.
If you are tired of the ads that read; I have the Rock looks, Armstrong stamina, Gene Simmons tongue, then give me a chance for a relaxing good time.
555-LICK...
Ladies, let me introduce you to your new Italian Teddy Bear! •*☆*• (what does that even mean???)
I'm in my prime and ready for action. •*☆*• (My prime started at 16 and should last till I'm 75)
Very clean and well groomed •*☆*• (I bathe every Saturday whether I need it or not, and I had a haircut right after Christmas)
I'm upscale and pics are 105% me •*☆*• (I got up on the scale and gained 12 pounds since the pics)
Ask about my specials •*☆*• (3 mins, 5 mins, or the bonus package: 7 mins and a short back rub)
See my website for rates •*☆*• (subject to change anytime without notice)
Don't text, don't call, don't email. Just show up at my place: 1313 Mockingbird Lane, ask for Herman.
•*☆*•Disclaimer: this is not a solicitation in any way and LE cannot arrest me cause I said so.
Howdy ladies,
Ya lookin' fer just the right fella to make all yer dreams cum true? Well what'cha waitin fer? I'm all tha man ya could ever want.
It's true, I'ma lil bit out tha way but I's truly got five star accommodations. For years my friends done said "HOT DANG BILLY, I wish I had'at trailer!"
For em gals that like it outdoorsy, there's a pig pen in back fer some real no-holds barred hootin and hollerin. HEH, HEH, HEH!
Now if ya ain't got many of 'em dead Presidents on ya, well don't fret! My rates ARE negotiable and I accept many forms of currency: pigs, salt, cows, sheep, gold, and silver.
But even if ya ain't got that, I'll still let ya on over! All ya gotta do is work off ya time after yer done. Five bucks per hour and ma'am lemme tell ya we could sure use extra help round here from a sexy gal such as yerself.
Space Mountain's open fer business! Come on over and lemme show ya how a real man treats his gal. (psst: Don't mind Fred watchin through tha window. It's sorta his thing).
Only upsellin is fer an extra 5 bucks ya can get yer picture taken durin, after, or right before.
Guaranteed to make ya squeal like a pig or yer currency back.
Billy
919-555-5555
Let me pamper you. Back Rub. Foot Rub. Hold your hand and just listen. All this and more when we connect. You can experience the Boy Friend Experience you have only dreamed of. No shortcuts, No Pressure, No rush. Discount for multi-hour engagements. Call 555-123-four703 to schedule your fantasy. No texts, no blocked numbers. Discretion assured. Profession, secure ladies only please.
And its probably a good thing
OLDTED'S EXOTIC DAY SPA
UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT! for the fifth time this year.
THEE place for ladies to be pampered. Papasan Charlie will draw you an exotic bath surrounded by candles. As you relax in the steamy water Charlie will softly strum your favorite Manilow song on his guitar (he knows them all). After 30 minutes he'll wrap you in the softest robe made and lead you to the massage room where oldted will rub out all the tension right down your back and out through the bottoms of your feet. On the flip his master hands will cause the earth to move beneath you from the release of your sensual energy. Your time will conclude with you wrapped in his gentle embrace.
You can find us at the Metrolina Industrial Business Park, Suite J, next to the World Full Gospel Fellowship Church on Frontage Road.
Parking in rear.
Posted By: Roadshow2
First off this is not meant to make fun of advertizers on Back page. Well ok, there are a few out there that are really off the chart. Actually this is meant for us fellas to make a bit of fun of ourselves.
The rules??? We dont need no stinking rules with one exception, DO NOT make fun of an individual.
Gentlemen, if I can call you that, post your "ad" replying to this post, not someone elses ad. And feel free to comment without being rude.
Ladies, no voting till tomorrow. Let everybody get in today. You know how busy these boys can get. Also ladies yall can shill a little rotflmao. Also ladies you cannot put your ad here. It wouldnt help your image at all being associated with our lame attempts lol.
The winner will be appointed to the city council of Hobbywood as the Director of Public Parks and Recreation. You will be responsible to ensure the grass patches are all trimmed and looking good. IF you catch my drift.
Good Luck and may the mmmm best mmmm stud win!
Enjoy a wonderful Tantric massage in your own home followed by an hour of nude house cleaning! My fingers (and if you request, my tounge) will massage every inch of your body into relaxation. Then as you sip a cold drink, sit back and enjoy the view! At 6' 2" and 200 lbs (soaking wet) your eyes will enjoy feasting on me as I dust, mop and yes do windows! I will bring the 6 pack, so make sure you are REALLY thirsty! 2 Hour sessions ONLY.
Call 864-BON-ESON or email me at [email protected] and we will discuss how many ROSES!
By contacting me you agree that you are in no way associated with law enforcement!
Any money exchanged is for my time, massage and cleaning services ONLY.
This is not an offer of prostitution.
I'm throwing in the proverbial towel after seeing some of these ads.....I am out of my league here...
