Going where no provider has gone before, netmichelle wears her sporting uniform of a pink pleated skirt, pink construction boots, padded black Victoria's Secret push up bra, Varga girl undies from the Museum of Sex Gift Shop. She straddles her legs with mallet in hand, and for every hoop she gets to ask for a sexual favor of the other team members, and one piece of clothing is selectively removed. The game was going good until her opponent's tallywhacker got bit by a mosquito. He was injured and was removed to the sidelines for further administration.
Reminds me of a funny...
A husband and wife are on a nudist beach when suddenly a wasp buzzes into the wife's business end. Naturally enough, she panics.
The husband is also quite shaken but manages to put a coat on her, pull up his shorts and carries her to the car. Then he makes a mad dash to the doctor. The doctor, after examining her, says that the wasp is too far in to remove with forceps so he says to the husband that he will have to try and entice it out by putting honey on his penis and withdrawing as soon as he feels the wasp.
And so the honey is smeared, but because of his wife's screaming and his frantic dash to the doctor and the general panic, he just can't rise to the occasion. So the doctor says he'll perform the deed if the husband and wife don't object.
Naturally both agree for fear the wasp will do any damage, so the doctor quickly undresses, smears the honey on and instantly gets an erection, at which time he begins to plug the wife. Only he doesn't stop and withdraw but continues with vigor.
The husband shouts, "What the hell's happening?" To which the doctor replies, "Change of plan. I'm going to drown the bastard!!!
Tally-Ho!
Part 1
The Other trainner's at the gym stiffled their laughter when Tony sauntered in. Tony had no idea what he was walking into. Unbeknownst to him, the guys had switched his schedule so that instead of the usual bunch of upper-east side socialites who'd paid through the nose to watch the beefy italian stud work up a sweat, Tony would be walking into a class full of angry lesbo-feminists who had been well informed of Big-Tony's infamous womanizing career and general cockiness. It was Tony's attitude in the gym and locker-room that had landed him in his impending perdicament. He already made the other guys feel inadequate with his overwhelming muscles and rugged good looks. But it was the fourteen inch salami and big old bull-balls that dangled between his over-muscled legs and the macho bragging about all the pussy he got that really made the guys despise him. They could'nt wait to see Big-Tony put in his place.
Tony was a real stud. When he walked into the gym that morning, all heads turned. He was 6 foot 2 inches and 250 pounds of pure italian muscle squeezed into a skintight navy-blue singlet from his high-school days as a star wrestler and all around superjock.
All the chicks ate him up as he swaggered down the center of the gym. Some of them stared at his face, his black hair and mustache, dark complelixion, square jaw and thick neck. Others checked out his killer bod. Broad shoulders, wide thick pecs and big round abs covered in light black fur, tree-trunk legs and cannonball biceps. The rest gaped openly at the monster bologne-pony held in place by the painfully tight speedo under his singlet. He winked at some and smiled at others, yep Tony was one big sex machine.
Walking up to the desk, he saw Kyle and the other trainners eyeing him disdainfully.
"Move over boys, theres a real man here now." he thought as he readjusted his big balls. He said
"Another day another dollar huh pindicks??"he said in his heavy Brooklyn accent as he walked past them.He was always calling the other dudes pindick's. He noticed one of the dudes looking at him funny and smilling. "fag" he thought as he opened the door to the private weight room where all his high-society nymphos waited to see what a "Real Man" looked like.
Closing and locking the door behind him, he threw his duffle bag to the ground. He looked at his class of scantily clad women.Most were real hot, though some were a little masculine looking.
"Hya'doin ladies, I'm Tony, but uh, alot of people around here call me "big-Tony" for uh, obvious reasons." His deep voice sounded through the room as he made his big pecs dance for the girls. He couldn't understand why none of the chicks seemed to smile, giggle or whisper to each other, it was usually a good ice breaker.
"tough room" he thought.
"oh well, they'll be meltin soon."
"Do you ladies like a big strong man?" he asked as he flashed his sexyest smile and did a bicep flex. Nothing.
"Hey whats a matter with you chicks??" Tony asked confused. Usually chicks were falling all over themselves to feel his muscles.
Two of the women in the front row came to him.
"Oh Tony, we know just what to do with a guy like you, who's big ALL over don't we girls??" she asked the class eyeing his ponderous bulge. The class answered "uh-huh" in unison and Tony smiled.
"Oh yeah, you girls know what to do with an Italian-Stallion such as myself?" he laughed
"oh yeah.."she said still eyeing his fat package. The second girl stood behind him and ran her hands down his massive muscular back.
"You'r sooooo big Tony.." she said as her hands reached his round bubblebutt. She then reached up and pealed the singlet down so that his huge hairy pecs and eight-pack were showing.
"Hey girls, what the fuck, you guys are turnin me on." he said looking over his big shoulder at the sexy chick checking out his ass.
"Let's see that ass " the first girl joined the second behind unsuspecting Tony. "Very nice " she said as she gave her counterpart the signal.
"Well I played alota football.." Tony said as the two girls reached into the back of his singlet, grasped the elastic of his red speedos with all foor hands and yanked upwards as hard as they could ,giving Big-Tony the worst wedgie ever. Immediately, Tony's face turned red as his big balls and fat dick were yanked violently backwards against his underside with blinding pain.
"HOLY SHIT MY NUTS!!!" he yelled as he fell to the floor grasping his groin with both hands.
"What the fuck man???" he screamed at the girls.
"oh Tony, we know just what to do with a big stud like you..." the first girl said as she grabbed a handfull of his manly chest hair and yanked.
"FUCK!!!" tony's hands flew to his pecs as he rolled onto his back leaving his mountanous groin jutting upwards between his beefy legs , proudly and unprotected. One of the larger women stepped forward and began talking.
"I betcha I could lift this preety boy off the ground ten times with just one hand..." she said.
"no way, he's way too big and heavy." a smaller girl said.
"Nah, check this out." the large woman reached down with one hand and grabbed a handfull of Tony's manhood. "Ready to count??" she said to the girl's.
Tony's eyes bulged as he realized what she was a bout to do.
"Please no, not my dick!!!" he pleaded trying to break her firm grip on his member to no avail.
"ONE" the class shouted as she puuled upwards on Tony's pround mound. His muscular ass left the floor as Big-Tony was lifted into the air by his fat cock.
"OHHHH OWWWWWWW! FUCKKKKKKKKK STOPPPP!" he yelled as his the womans grip tightened on his dick.
"TWO!" the ladies yelled as he was lifted over and over. By Five, Tony's dick was swelling between her fingers as she kept lifting the entire weight, 250 pounds of muscle, by the king-sized johnson.
"TEN!!!" the ladies shouted and Tony was dropped to the ground as he clutched his abused tool in both hands. His pride and joy was obiously dammaged and there was swelling at the base and the tip.It felt longer and deformed.
"My dick man! You ruinned my big DICK!! what the fuck!!!!" he screamed. He was rocking himself back and forth when one of the ladies finally stepped to him and tried to grab him. He rolled over on his stomach and tried to crawl to the door. This was the one time that having a huge package wasn't an asset. Tony's big nuts were obvious and an easy target from behind. The girl stepped between his muscley legs and slammed her foot down on his huge ballsack. Tony screamed in pain. His babymakers were crushed against the cold hard floor.
"OOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOWWWWW MY BALLS!!!!" he screamed.
The ladies cheared.
"Well we've had enough fun, don't you think?" she said." well maybe not yet.." she clapped her hands and the girls came into action. Tony's enormous body was picked up and brought to the standing weight machine.
"What are you doin ??" he cried
"You'll see big boy..." one of them said.
Handcuffs were brought out and tony's meaty hands were cuffed over his head to the machine.
"Let me go pleasE!!!!" he begged.
Tony stood, tied up and shamed. Tears came down his face. His massive hairy chest heaved as he cried.His big macho muscles now useless.
One of the girls finally pulled the singlet down around his ankles to his black Nike high-tops and football socks,leaving him only in a tight red bikini brief, bulging obsenely full of his abused dick.
"God Tony you really have one huge horse cock don't you." she said as she produced a can opener and a can of dog-food.
"WWWWWWhat the fuck are you gonna do wit that??" he asked squirming.
"You'll see. Becky, the honners."
a girl stepped forward stairing at his huge sweaty meat and potatoes barely contained in the red speedo . Reching over, she pulled the waistband away from his hairy eight-pack stomack so as to pear into the shorts. Then, the now open can of dog food was dumped onto the big fallen stud's broken cock and balls. Letting go of the elastic, the ladies were pleasently surprised that his osupertight speedos held most of the cold wet dogfood.
""What the fuck is this man??" Tony pleaded.But the ladies were already filling out.
"Hey Where the fuck ar you going!!!" he yelled squirming with a crotch full of dogfood. "You can't leave me like this!!" he yelled. The door closed and he was alone. His painned pecker sitting in dogfood. He was in more pain than he'd ever had even in football. His huge dong and swollen balls ached from forty different places, but he did'nt think there was any permanent dammage.
Maybe he'd need a schlong cast but he'd be back in buisness in no time.Just then the backdoor opened. He was expecting someone to walk in, but instead he was greated with the sight of a large pit-bull.
"Oh fuck. " he said looking down at his prized possession hanging defenselessly in his dogfood filled speedo.
"Nice puppy...." Tony said The dog smelled the food and went straight for the tied up muscleman. Sniffing at the big bodybuilders captive crotch the dog was obviously hungry.
"Fella's!!!" Tony yelled "Help me Man!!!" he called trying to summon the other trainners. The dog had started licking the big macho italians crotch trying to get some food from the spandex pouch to no avail and was now getting angry.
"Nice doggy..." Tony squirmed trying to move the bulbous crotch away from the hungry dog. Finally, fed up with the tight speedo restricting his access, the dog decided there was only one thing to do. The dog bite down hard on poor Tony's groin.
"OHHHHHHH FUUUUUCKKKKK!!!" the hairy jock screamed as the dog tore into his big manmeat. The first bite luckily only grazed Tony's big balls but the dog was relentless. The second bite clamped down hard on Tony's fourteen inch hot-dog like a beartrap. "FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK!" Tony howled. The dog yanked mercilessly on Big Tony's fat prick. Twisting and yanking it. The muscle-jock's huge beaten member was being stretched and pulled out of all proportion. The dog released the big pecker and dove in again this time getting a big mounthfull of Tony's huge nutsack.
"OHHHHHH SHIIIITIITTTT!!!" The big stud screamed. The dog dove again and again. Catching Tony's big prick between its jaws again the dog became furious at the sausage and began yanking wildly. Tony's tight red speedo were torn completely to shreads by now and soon Big-Tony's manhood would be too.
"OHHHHH FUUUUUUCK MMMYYYYYYY DIIIIIICKKKKK!" Tony yelled as the big dog finally won the tug of war with Tony's fourteen inch italian sausage.
Outside at the desk, the other trainners laughed. Big-Tony's career as a super-stud was over... (AUTHOR UNKNOWN)
Baddabing!
Thank God it wasn't this Tony. I wouldn't wish that upon my worst enemy although a certain few come to mind. May have to work this into the script next year as I'm flush out of bowling bags.
-- Modified on 6/16/2004 10:47:44 AM
What kind of mosquito would pass up a delectable little treat like you just to bite some guy on his johnson?
I can think of a hundred places on you that would taste far sweeter. Maybe it was suffering from West Nile virus.
and deep throated him back to life!
And that's how we know NetMichelle is having a good day!
/Zin
That will take the swelling down...eventually.
/Zin
-- Modified on 6/18/2004 8:24:10 AM
Too bad for that poor dude's tallywacker...lol
I see you weren't wearing your 20' black stilettos...That would have really thrown off your pest biiten opponent....
but those were for another place and yet.... the same day....lol
Mighty fine!
Cheers!