what is so great about beautiful women? The jes' reglar ones are the real gems in my book!
There area few courtesans who truly combine stunning beauty with compelling skills and personality. But usually I have found you get an either or situation. I prefer the regular ladies- their reality is usually great and pleasant enough.
And who needs the really haughty bitches? Not me and I suspect not you either.
But I am lucky- I only really need a bbbbj about 4 times a year- for the guys going nuts w/o SOs (or with them -worse)- I forgive them for going for the hotties. But even then I bet a more approachable lady would end up being more fun!
Wow! 24% of you said you would not "hobby" with your S/O given the chance. I hobby with my wife and find it very surprising the number was that high. I would be very interested to see the reasons why those 24% answered no. If you don't mind please take a second to reply. I have included some answers that came to my mind to make it simpler to answer. If you don't fit into one of the answers below please take a moment to give your own reason.
A. Afraid of the problems that may arise in the relationship in the future.
B. Prefer one on one.
C. My S/O is unattractive and this situation would be
undesireable.
D. Due to extra cost that is usually involved in hiring a provider for couples. (I doubt this one but had to ask).
From the reaction my SO had to the one triple opportunity we had, I'd say it would mess up our relationship...
We've been over this on the forums before. Anyway ...
For me, the short quick answer is, I feel "driven" to providers because of my own lack of charm / income / desirability / sexiness / game / pimpishness / sensitivity / coolness / wardrobe / whatever-the-fuck-it-is-that-women-want. If I could figure out how to get the girl(s) whom I meet, and whom I want to go to bed with me, to actually DO that, then I wouldn't be paying the money for the girl(s) I've never met, to do that as a surrogate.
I don't condemn or criticize men who choose hobbying despite having civilian options -- the hobby certainly provides many beneficial side-effects. But for me, I'm only in it because of my own detrimental civilian situation. Consequently, if the civilian optinos improved, the "need" to hobby would be (and this is borne out by my experience) eliminated.
-- Modified on 5/24/2004 4:55:54 PM
I hobby because I have Too. I have meet many wonderful women in my life, but NONE of them have ever been interested in me enough to date me. I believe its because I have a physical disability.
I notice a lot of guys trying to get the same girls- ususally the "hot" ones. I was a college athlete with the capability to hunt in those waters and I thought it absurd. The hotties all know it and react accordingly- plus they are often not as deep as the others- go for the second and third tier- flawed beauty/one bad feature/not quite hot but cute enough and you'll do better- plus they outnumber the truly hot by a lot, so you open up the pool...
Cute enough is the best group- and usually are sexier...
MHO- a hobbyist with a really good SO relationship (didn't we ALL have hot sex with a beautiful woman this morning at 6:15AM?).
Sully I am in agreeance. I read reviews and it's the same men who go buy beauty only to be disappointed over and over. When will they ever learn?
what is so great about beautiful women? The jes' reglar ones are the real gems in my book!
There area few courtesans who truly combine stunning beauty with compelling skills and personality. But usually I have found you get an either or situation. I prefer the regular ladies- their reality is usually great and pleasant enough.
And who needs the really haughty bitches? Not me and I suspect not you either.
But I am lucky- I only really need a bbbbj about 4 times a year- for the guys going nuts w/o SOs (or with them -worse)- I forgive them for going for the hotties. But even then I bet a more approachable lady would end up being more fun!
I agree, about the "either / or." It's odd, isn't it? You don't often find that men who are tall, are also stupid, for example. Instead, the two traits are rather independent. Or that women with flat feet are also hysterical. Or that children with gap teeth are also excellent at math.
But you do find, quite often, that extremely physically attractive women are usually vapid and shallow. The "next tier" is really much more interesting.
I theorize, that it's either because (a) they're that beautiful because they spend so much time on it, so really the only thing to learn is that the cart seems before the horse; the vapidity and shallowness LEAD TO the excess obsession, the fashion-plate and gym-rat behavior, hence the beauty; or (b) they've always gotten what they want because of their beauty, and never had to learn to be nice or have any other character strengths.
But (b) begs a question: do people have to LEARN to be nice? Aren't there some people who just start out that way? Why would beauty DIScourage it, if it is (presumably) an average trait, not a rare and difficult-to-find one?
And anyway, who likes to fuck her "niceness"? I honestly care very little for her "niceness" when I'm considering whether or not I want to have sex with her. Want to have a RELATIONSHIP with her, yes, I want her to be nice. But have sex? No. I want her to be sexually hot to me. Niceness has nothing to do with it, except in so far as I have to put up with her personality from here to the bedroom when I finally get her there.
ALso, isn't "need for beauty" somewhat hard-wired? I'd LOVE to "lower my target" a bit and go for women less attractive than ideal. But John Henry won't get hard. They're great people, these friends. But then I want to go fuck their roommates, no matter how nice the "second tier" ones are, and John Henry won't comply with the "niceness" stratagem. He is blind to all but "hotness."
your John Henry belongs with them bootiful but vapid gals. I prefer John Henrys that actually want eroticism that is a little more complicated.. and puts us both on a MUCH deeper level sexually. Vapids please stay with vapids!!! I dont WANT the shallow guys! deeeep deeeeeep DEEEEEEEEEP suits my needs OH so much better!
... I only get hard for fucking grown-up ladies & grown-up ladies look ALL sorts of different ways. It's lucky that we all have have a secret sign so we can recognize each other and we don't have to fool around with the bozos (or is it bozi??) most of the time.
Stay happy 'doll. Hope your main guy gave you a good b'day present. Harry
for a male/female couple.. I fricken LOVE couples.. especially if we create a fantasy pick up scenario in a bar or sometin HOT like that! I also make sure that the female is the focus.. by me as well as him... that is how you decrease jealousy.. and okay it is true.. I love having my face smashed while two people are slammin on top of me. 
If I lived in Chicago, I'd be broke.
A very memorable two hours it was.
She proves the adage: all the (VERY, VERY) good ones are married.
What does "given the chance" mean? My S/O doesn't know I hobby; if she did, she certainly wouldn't be interested. So the chance would never come up.
I would like the idea of hobbying with a provider w/ whom I had an ongoing relationship. Do it in a New York minute.
WOW, have never seen a subject take such a turn. I wasnt asking about shallow men or about hot college girls. My question was simply - What are your reasons for not having a provider with your SO. It has nothing to do with beauty or being shallow.
My SO is very "hot". I would likely give her an 8 if I had to rate her here. She has a tiny spinner body and enjoys being with women as well as men (maybe more so). When she suggested we have a girl over to join us in the hot tub, I jumped at the chance. We have been in the hobby ever since. Just wanted to know why some would not. Maybe I'm missing your point?
P.S. for bebedoll - It's great you don't upcharge for couples, I never have understood this practice. I do, however understand why some providers have a 2 hr minimum for such service (you can't satisfy 2 people in an hr) and we usually do 2 hrs anyway.