I mean afterall, we only have his side of the story to go on. What if he isn't just a coward, but a liar as well and she canceled for a VERY different reason that what he claims here?
I mean being a coward and a liar are not mutually exclusive, it's quite possible he is both and perhaps trying to extort a lady with the "threat" of naming her here.I was to meet a very well reviewed provider in the area this weekend. It was to be our first meeting and she had lots of time to screen me, was happy with what she found, told me how much she was looking forward to it and we set a day and time a couple days out. No rushing, no last minute stuff, a full hour, no QV stuff. Should go smoothly. She knew from the texts that I was driving in from an hour away to see her.
So the day comes, I start out from home, texting her with my ETA. She texts me back when I'm halfway there asking if we can push it back by 45 minutes. I say OK, but that I'll have to cool my heels somewhere while I wait since I'm already on the road. The new time comes and goes. I text her asking where, no answer. I text her again after the new time passes, no answer. I wait another 15 minutes, try again, no answer. Another 15 minutes, then I text her that I think she's standing me up, no answer. 20 minutes later, I text her and tell her that I'm leaving. 8 minutes later (almost two hours after the original appointment and well over an hour after the reset appointment, she finally texts "I'm sorry baby, we had an appointment run over," and that's it. I text back that I just wasted 3 hours of my time.
I don't want to be a whiner, but that's not acceptable. My original appointment was set days in advance and she knew I had to travel an hour. I thought of posting a bad review, but that's not honest. But I hate to let that kind of behavior just slide, especially since she is not a Backpage girl, but a well and heavily reviewed provider on TER in the well above average price range. She didn't appear to give a shit that she wasted my time like that and made no attempt to make up for it.
Any suggestions?
I've seen several of these types of threads over on the general board and essentially it comes down to 3 options from your end of the shit treatment. I will say one thing for her based on what you've said here. Her willingness to tell you the truth about the situation rather than make something up gives you some additional insight into how she runs her business and her consideration of potential new friends. What is it? New friends are not relevant and courtesy is not extended as a general rule.
I hate to be captain obvious on that one, but just in case someone reading doesn't follow my train of thought. Hey, it happens.
Your options from the way I see it.
1) Name said provider and the potential drama that goes with that. I'm not saying I would if I was in your shoes or I wouldn't. I'm not sure. Pissed as hell? Yes given the way you've laid out the sequence of events. It would certainly appear that she has no intention of reaching back out to you and I'm not sure it could be "made right" at this point from your perspective. Really, even if there was an attempt, how would the session go?
2) Provide back channel info at a minimum for those who would ask, you'll most likely see the PM from me. If she treats one that way, she'll do it again. That lack of courtesy is not something I would care to even attempt to reward with my play time and one can only wonder how does she really treat her friends when they are visiting?
3) Move on and spend the time with someone else. Either way I know that is what you will have to do, as would I. The question really is do you do option #1 or option #2 at all?
Sorry that happened my friend and your time wound up wasted on the weekend. It certainly sounds as if were doing the appropriate levels of diligence to ensure a good time. I find myself having to drive an hour sometimes two but knock on wood have not had this happen to me yet.
Not sure if my response helps but thanks for sharing and looking out for the rest of us. Be on the lookout for that PM
...to call her out here. It's understandable if you're concerned about blowback from her; your choice. The sad fact of the game is that it's not uncommon for an appointment to get blown off for a better offer.
I'd back channel this one. The WK's and several others would try to fuck you over to no end. Several of her "good" reviewers would call Bullshit and you could end up on a couple provider DNS lists (maybe) it's not worth the headache. Back channel works just as well as putting her on "Blast" on the board without all the blowback.
Both times were with well know women on this board.
First time I drove a good bit and got there and nothing. No text, no calls. I was rather pissed.
Second time she admitted to it but it was still frustrating.
My approach is simple. It's a retail business. Many ladies are looking to maximize profits. She has the right to refuse me service or it was a simple mistake. Or she doubles book and I get pushed out in that case (bad form ladies). I can not review and frankly refuse to name names here or anywhere because I truly do not know the circumstances. Sure I want to believe she stood up and it is all her fault. But that is very one sided.
So my reaction is to not go back. Well not try and see this person again. That is hard because both ladies have good reviews and it is tempting to want to call them. But it is a retail business and I choose not to shop there anymore.
I hate this happened to you. It is inexcusable given the details and your flexibility and going the extra mile to accommodate her requests. I don't think she ever had any intention of meeting with you and I find it poor taste and a total lack of respect on her part to treat anyone this way. Especially after you agreed to back the appointment up. Wasting three to four hours of your time, the fact that you had to travel, and the extreme lack of courtesy warrant that you simply post who it was with so the rest of us know the situation and to be aware. I have had the same happen to me before and it is not funny. It is not complaining on your part. It is simply stating the facts. And using the excuse of an appointment running over is lame. It shows she had no respect for your time and effort and appointment. She could have easily told her current client she had another appointment and asked that he leave instead (assuming that was true) she chose to crap on you.
But if guys would finally start calling them out publicly on their BS then maybe they'd stop doing it... As often at least lol.
Sorry ya got stood up, my VIP is out you have my hobby email if you want to share privately. Haven't heard from you in a while guessing my aggressive fix took care of your hvac problems.
Yup, everything fine in the HVAC stuff, you stand behind your work. Haven't been hobbying the past year or so, been with a civvie exploring the kink world. Fun stuff, developed a real love for rope. Pretty young rope bottoms really do it for me. There are some interesting things to discover in the real world, too. But I'm hobbying again, just searching slowly for a regular, sampling the gorgeous women in the Carolinas, trying to find that perfect combination.
She should not have treated you that way, and there is no good excuse for it. I would feel just as bad and upset as you do, and probably wouldn't try to go back. Knowing that a girl will keep an appointment, is number one for me.
However, I know that some "very well reviewd providers" can and do sometimes get serious crap plied against them by some clients gone bad, who thus spoil things for the rest of us. Maybe even forcing her into an early retirement...
You talk in terms of minutes, or a few hours of inconvienence. Some ladies have to deal with shit, and even stalking, for weeks, months, and longer. And not just of her, but her family too. If so, that would be really rough. So maybe, in perspective, I would give her another call.
I don't imply that is her case, but we never know. It's just a "hobby", as they say, for us. But for her, it is much more
Very nice point of view!
My first instinct as a business woman is to say I would politely decline the request to extend a session if it will conflict with other commitments. And I certainly would never tell a client I had other appointments that day! Having 2 established clients is better in the long run than just having 1.
But then again its true that sometimes we are put in compromising positions... It's amazing the things some people in this hobby will do to punish others, from petty yet harmless passive aggressive blows to their self esteem, gossip, to threats, use of their photos for online scamming, and even stalking and harassment. And for some women who feel they are a slave to maintaining an unblemished reputation and high numbers, or even their privacy and safety, well... I'm sure you can fill in the blank.
However, I know that some "very well reviewd providers" can and do sometimes get serious crap plied against them by some clients gone bad, who thus spoil things for the rest of us. Maybe even forcing her into an early retirement...
You talk in terms of minutes, or a few hours of inconvienence. Some ladies have to deal with shit, and even stalking, for weeks, months, and longer. And not just of her, but her family too. If so, that would be really rough. So maybe, in perspective, I would give her another call.
I don't imply that is her case, but we never know. It's just a "hobby", as they say, for us. But for her, it is much more.
I don't like drama and don't intend to call out the provider publicly on this. I know that there isn't any way to "make it up", as one poster said, how would that session go? I'm just going to cross her off my "Want to See" list and write it off.
I've had worse experiences in the hobby. This one in particular just pissed me off because I didn't do anything stupid like see an unreviewed girl off BP and I still got slapped and insulted. I guess the reason that I bothered to post it was that I wanted other providers to know that while we love them, this is still a business relationship and you don't want angry customers out there. Every angry customer tells ten people who tells ten people, etc. Things go downhill fast. There can be consequences when you don't give a shit about a booked client.
I've met some amazing women in the hobby, many of whom I would be proud and happy to have as a personal friend outside of the hobby. I understand (I think) some of the economic and social forces working here, and appointments do run late sometimes, that's understandable. But running two hours late? I don't think so, that's just cold rude and demonstrates an intolerable lack of respect.
Venting over, /RANT OFF , enough said, moving on.
Most guys know that this kind of shit has real consequences in the business world, but a young provider who never had a job and has the attitude that guys will always be there with cash stuffed envelopes ... Not so much.
It's like getting robbed and instead of going to the police telling yourself "Well, they know what they did and now they have to live with it"
NEWSFLASH, liars, crooks and thieves don't have a "guilty conscience" about what they have done, quite the contrary, "getting away with it" just reinforces the idea that what they are doing works. Whining about it here and then doing nothing is if anything, worse than saying nothing at all.
-- Modified on 4/11/2016 5:45:53 PM
Don't whine and complain unless you are going to do something constructive about it.
I mean afterall, we only have his side of the story to go on. What if he isn't just a coward, but a liar as well and she canceled for a VERY different reason that what he claims here?
I mean being a coward and a liar are not mutually exclusive, it's quite possible he is both and perhaps trying to extort a lady with the "threat" of naming her here.
The deck is stacked. I call her out in public and get blacklisted. Is that worth it? I don't think so. Maybe the thought of how much back channel communication is going on might give her pause to not do it again so lightly.
Congratulations, you have now graduated into becoming a BSU.
Either grow a spine and call the bitch out or STFU and quit your goddamned whining. The only thing that's going through her mind (and mine) right now is what a pussy you are, and who she can probably do this again and again with guys like you without ever being called out for it.
Do you hear that sound? That's dozens of ROB's LOLng at you and your impotence all at once at the top of their lungs.
....who stood me up twice recently here in Florida? She travels between the two areas. Well reviewed and I had a date with her one-time doubles partner so she knows I am "legitimate."
Sucks. Happens. Worst part is that if it was reversed and YOU stood HER up in that fashion, your name would be on a black list in record time. Nothing you can do but move on. Good news is...you have that money in your pocket. Add a little more to it and go even bigger and better with the next provider on your to do list. While that was a hobbying disappointment, I'm betting your next dream girl date will make up for it, big time.
-- Modified on 4/17/2016 5:29:03 PM
i have also had the same thing happen to me from a high end provider in the Raleigh area. We did a meet up and talked for so time, set up a evening date with her. texted a couple of times. Set the date and time, and as of today have not heard a word from her. I just wished that some of the providers were up front and just tell us if you are not interested. But it all worked out as I found a Great provider. that's not her