The safeword is the biggest thing. It's not uncommon for a guy to be "too nice" to not listen to the word no as well. I have had a few book fetish sessions who found that they just couldn't get past hearing the word no regardless of how much I told them it was ok, I wanted it, and so forth.
Ok, so I've really been playing with this for some time now. Most can tell by my reviews this is something I really enjoy. The thing is, when the words "no please! !" just slip out because I'm getting all reved up, some guys literally stop and say "oh no, am I hurting you?" I usually just giggle and say "please DO hurt it" Now keep in mind, I don't do this with every single guy but I feel pretty comfortable with majority of the guys I see plus I do require several references from well known ladies. Are nice guys just to "nice" to do this?
How in the world do I just let some know that I WANT them to take it? Is this something that's just to weird or taboo for most? How do you all here on the bdsm board feel about consensual non consent?
Thanks for your input and suggestions
Xoxo,
TL
Something unusual that is only said when you really mean stop, not just saying it as part of the activity.
Something like swordfish, or similar easy to remember and unique word
Exactly...and you need to be having a conversation with your play partners before you play to let them know, something like "when I say "manatee" that means stop what you are doing, otherwise, don't stop!"
But don't make it something that you won't be able to remember once you are playing...if it is too difficult, you could end up in a situation where you or they get hurt and you don't want that!!!
Play safe 
K
Red, yellow, green...
They aren't exciting or creative by any means, but unless you're playing with someone that you're extremely familiar with, I feel like everyone will remember & understand those so easily, and unless you drop the red bomb, the fun can continue!
The art is to understand when a "punishment or abuse" is just "unpleasant" enough to be effective but not so to cross the boundaries. This requires either ongoing knowledge of the other person or --most often -- clear understandings. Safe words are vital but one could have more than one "yellow" means I like it be not more intense or whatever you want it mean mean while "Red means STOP.
One of the best domme ladies I ever played with is an amateur, married to a man with no interest who loves control and torment. One of her friends she told me loves to haves his balls kicked and beaten while he begs for mercy. I hate to have my balls tortured, but at a key moment she would knee me once (ouch) just hard enough and make it clear that would happen again much harder unless....
I used to play with a sub who hated to be blind folded, but after I had brought her --fully restrained--over and over to the edge of climax and then gave her "permission" to cum she would a giant climax. She would calm down and say she was done. After a minute, as she lay there fully restrained, I would then blind fold her ("please please not that" and tell her I would leave her restrained and blind folded while I went out and ran errands unless she could climax again within a certain time while I used vibrators from and back (which alway made her crazy.) "Please pleas, you know I can't. Please take off the bind fold". Then I would begin and of course she would have a second great climax. I would reward her by removing the blind fold, ("Thank you thank you Master') and then give her long and very affectionate after care.
Yeah, I have purple as my safe word 
it just doesn't sound like any other word to me. I guess I'll just have to let people get to know me so me asking them to take it won't freak them out
Thanks again
Xoxo,
TL
The safeword is the biggest thing. It's not uncommon for a guy to be "too nice" to not listen to the word no as well. I have had a few book fetish sessions who found that they just couldn't get past hearing the word no regardless of how much I told them it was ok, I wanted it, and so forth.
We need more sexy mature submissive ladies like you in LA. I would love to knock on your hotel door and pounce on you when you open the door. Struggle, plead and try to get away as I hold you down on the bed and take you. Make you hot by sucking your toes as you struggle, flip you over and force your panties down so I can tongue your ass as u plead "please don't"!
As others have said, it's about communication and trust. I'm not sure that you can have that with a first-time friend or client. It has to be earned. The CNC top needs to be very sure of what the bottom really wants, as well, so he can understand what she's really meaning/feeling during play. I'm assuming that the client (guy) is the top and the provider is the bottom. Some guys might take advantage of the situation or misunderstand or _____ and things could get out of hand. People vary a lot in what they really want in CNC play and what's fine for one person would get someone blacklisted or worse for another. Some like it actually very rough with bruises and blood, some like it exciting but not really rough, some like to pretend its rough, etc. You have to get to know each other.
CNC is something that I only do with friends that I've played with enough to know and trust. Ladies, I'd stay away from CNC with new clients and stick with D/s until you know each other well enough.
There are lots of resources on the subject, though I've found that it helps to first explore such fantasies outside of the p4p realm. Have fun!!